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Thread: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

  1. #11341
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I've got a pretty gag reflex, you know, it's part of my business, but seriously I cannot service you without getting violently ill. So....goodbye.

    2/28: SALES @ Brick and Mortar
    2/28: Objekt @ TBA
    3/1: Holly Herndon @ The Lab
    3/6: Steffi, Virginia @ Mighty
    3/14: Simian Mobile Disco b2b Roman Flugel, JPhlip @ PW
    3/23: HINDS @ Rickshaw Stop

  2. #11342
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    If I taste your dick, I will vomit bile.
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  3. #11343

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Once a month for a year and a half was just fine. She was an entertainment industry chick (which I prefer to pimped chicks or total desperados), so it would be great if her career took off so I could say myself, I can't believe I used to hang out with her.
    "why are you so annoying" TheKlein25

  4. #11344

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    Once a month for a year and a half was just fine. She was an entertainment industry chick (which I prefer to pimped chicks or total desperados), so it would be great if her career took off so I could say myself, I can't believe I used to hang out with her.
    wait...what
    Quote Originally Posted by Mammoth85 View Post
    I hope Wario and Donkey Kong don't conflict.

  5. #11345

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I have a slight stutter which makes it hard to talk to women. The treatment I am getting here is typical of the treatment people like me have had to endure throughout history.
    "why are you so annoying" TheKlein25

  6. #11346
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Oh, the historical suffering of stutterers. I heard they're erecting a memorial in Statham, GA.

    2/28: SALES @ Brick and Mortar
    2/28: Objekt @ TBA
    3/1: Holly Herndon @ The Lab
    3/6: Steffi, Virginia @ Mighty
    3/14: Simian Mobile Disco b2b Roman Flugel, JPhlip @ PW
    3/23: HINDS @ Rickshaw Stop

  7. #11347
    old school HotHamWater's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Oh, the historical suffering of stutterers. I heard they're erecting a memorial in Statham, GA.
    Hey, fatty, how much have you expanded over the past two weeks?

  8. #11348
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    ASTRONOMICALLY.

    2/28: SALES @ Brick and Mortar
    2/28: Objekt @ TBA
    3/1: Holly Herndon @ The Lab
    3/6: Steffi, Virginia @ Mighty
    3/14: Simian Mobile Disco b2b Roman Flugel, JPhlip @ PW
    3/23: HINDS @ Rickshaw Stop

  9. #11349
    old school HotHamWater's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    You're probably not much on the eyes now, but it makes for funnier message boarding for everyone else.

  10. #11350
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I certainly feel funnier. Also, fleshy.

    2/28: SALES @ Brick and Mortar
    2/28: Objekt @ TBA
    3/1: Holly Herndon @ The Lab
    3/6: Steffi, Virginia @ Mighty
    3/14: Simian Mobile Disco b2b Roman Flugel, JPhlip @ PW
    3/23: HINDS @ Rickshaw Stop

  11. #11351
    old school HotHamWater's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    And pretty gassy, I imagine.

  12. #11352
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    If you were a hooker--and still fat, that part doesn't change--how much would it cost for you to fuck that guy?
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  13. #11353
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    The embarrassing part about the hooker-pricing-speculation game is that I always low ball. Especially when I'm hungry (which is often, cus of the fats).

    2/28: SALES @ Brick and Mortar
    2/28: Objekt @ TBA
    3/1: Holly Herndon @ The Lab
    3/6: Steffi, Virginia @ Mighty
    3/14: Simian Mobile Disco b2b Roman Flugel, JPhlip @ PW
    3/23: HINDS @ Rickshaw Stop

  14. #11354
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I've heard you offer a discount with little to no prompting. "100 for everything." "Oka--" "Make that 15."
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  15. #11355
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    "Fine, I've only got $6 in my pocket. And I really want that Dominoes coupon on your fridge. Let's get this thing going."

    2/28: SALES @ Brick and Mortar
    2/28: Objekt @ TBA
    3/1: Holly Herndon @ The Lab
    3/6: Steffi, Virginia @ Mighty
    3/14: Simian Mobile Disco b2b Roman Flugel, JPhlip @ PW
    3/23: HINDS @ Rickshaw Stop

  16. #11356
    VigoTheCarpathian
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I used to be such a sweet sweet thing 'till they got a hold of me
    Last edited by VigoTheCarpathian; 02-13-2013 at 05:30 PM. Reason: Board induced mental health deterioration

  17. #11357

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I'd give Guedita a hundred and I never pay more than 50
    "why are you so annoying" TheKlein25

  18. #11358

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I'd give Guedita a hundred and I never pay more than 50
    A hundred and one, Bob.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mammoth85 View Post
    I hope Wario and Donkey Kong don't conflict.

  19. #11359
    Coachella Junkie Miroir Noir's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    @fakedansavage
    Go home, #fuckfirst, work up appetite—9PM or 10PM reservations easier to get, meal more enjoyable with no more V-Day obligations to fulfill!
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    To you guys I say Wat?????????? Off to ?????? ....... cr****
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    It's hard to argue with that.

  20. #11360

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I know it's stupid, but I'm feeling blue today.

  21. #11361
    Member ENluv12's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by IceyHotshot View Post
    I know it's stupid, but I'm feeling blue today.
    I am sorry. flowers.jpeg
    Quote Originally Posted by involvelemons View Post
    Silent discos are like having sex with a virgin: really exciting in theory, extremely awkward in execution.
    Quote Originally Posted by BROKENDOLL View Post
    I bet Cara's gotten enough Twats on a Platter and Dick on a Stick to open her own Trolls to Go snack shop.

  22. #11362
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Sorry, Paul.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Churros are for single user eating and are not to be shared.

  23. #11363

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Thanks. I hope all you who celebrate have a lovely day.

  24. #11364
    Coachella Junkie getbetter's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Paul you know this one of those day some girls are dying for a guy to pay attention to them..why dont you go talk to some girls.
    Translation


    Caribou @The Fillmore 03/01/15
    The Pop Group @ GAMH 03/11/15
    Swans @ Terminal West 03/28/15
    Electric Wizard @ Slims 04/17/15
    Acid Mother Temple @ BOTM 04/18/15
    Faith No More @ the Warfield 04/20/15
    John Zorn @ UCLA 05/02/15
    Will Bulter @ Slims 05/26/15
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    Last.fm



  25. #11365
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    If it's any consolation, I rolled my eyes extra hard at your woe-is-me post, Paul.

    2/28: SALES @ Brick and Mortar
    2/28: Objekt @ TBA
    3/1: Holly Herndon @ The Lab
    3/6: Steffi, Virginia @ Mighty
    3/14: Simian Mobile Disco b2b Roman Flugel, JPhlip @ PW
    3/23: HINDS @ Rickshaw Stop

  26. #11366

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Who needs companionship when you have life-affirming eyerolls from guedita?

  27. #11367
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    ...and if it's any consolation, I'm spending Valentine's evening with my parents, and I won't be getting any gifts/flowers this year.
    Last edited by amyzzz; 02-14-2013 at 10:56 AM. Reason: s
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Churros are for single user eating and are not to be shared.

  28. #11368
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I'll be home alone going nuts from cymbalta withdrawal. IT COULD BE WORSE
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  29. #11369
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I actually feel pretty good today. Yay anti-depressants (not cymbalta!).
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Churros are for single user eating and are not to be shared.

  30. #11370
    Member ENluv12's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I think I need to get back on mine.
    Quote Originally Posted by involvelemons View Post
    Silent discos are like having sex with a virgin: really exciting in theory, extremely awkward in execution.
    Quote Originally Posted by BROKENDOLL View Post
    I bet Cara's gotten enough Twats on a Platter and Dick on a Stick to open her own Trolls to Go snack shop.

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