It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

[SlowMotionApocalypse]

hand job

[RotationSlimWang]

... how about for a second date you just hand her 60 dollars and take your blowie?

[RotationSlimWang]

Also, for fuck's sake, I was a whore myself and even I feel like this is brutally unromantic.

[SlowMotionApocalypse]

Also, for fuck's sake, I was a whore myself and even I feel like this is brutally unromantic.

are you female?

I found it to be fun and exciting.

[RotationSlimWang]

... and now you're trying to take her out on a real date? Dude just buy some weed and keep it near a bed.

[SlowMotionApocalypse]

... and now you're trying to take her out on a real date? Dude just buy some weed and keep it near a bed.

No, I want a repeat, she isn't getting back to me.

Now answer my question.

[RotationSlimWang]

No, I am not female. You don't have to have a vag to be a ho.

[SlowMotionApocalypse]

No, I am not female. You don't have to have a vag to be a ho.

Why did you do it? Drugs, survival, excitement, Coachella tickets?

[RotationSlimWang]

... fun?

[SlowMotionApocalypse]

... fun?

Awesome!

[JustSteve]

No, I am not female. You don't have to have a vag to be a ho.

[bmack86]

I love it. That is classic.

[chairmenmeow47]

i like hiking dates, but not as a first date. i was trapped on a trail once with a guy who wanted to know if eggs went bad or not.

outdoorsy people are attractive, but they always tend to be more hardcore than i am.

[getbetter]

First dates shoukd always include some type of intoxication to make sure they can keep their shit togethor.

[guedita]

I'm with you. During my extremely brief foray into online dating I filtered out anyone who appeared to go outside too much.

Right. I was silly to ever think I'd find a guy who was down to lay in bed doing drugs, having sex, and watching Golden Girls with me on a dating site.

[RotationSlimWang]

I'll hang out in your bed, I'll do your drugs, and I'll penetrate your orifices... but I'm probably gonna be paying more attention to my laptop than GG.

[weeklymix]

I haven't had sex in a while.

[Zafocaine]

Right. I was silly to ever think I'd find a guy who was down to lay in bed doing drugs, having sex, and watching Golden Girls with me on a dating site.

Golden Girls is sort of a deal killer. No one wants to look up from blasting a line up their nose to seeing you fifty years in the future on television. *shivers*

[Zafocaine]

Golden Girls is sort of a deal killer. No one wants to look up from blasting a line up their nose to seeing you fifty years in the future on television. *shivers*

And when I say no one, I mean this guy right here is down. Was I supposed to be more subtle? Fail.

[chairmenmeow47]

I haven't had sex in a while.

start with getting rid of the unibrow

[sonofhal]

Probably been mentioned, but...

http://www.indiedating.com/us/

[chairmenmeow47]

Probably been mentioned, but...

http://www.indiedating.com/us/

hahaha, we should battle for who can make the most pretentious profile

[getbetter]

I got the cats to like me !!!!! They seem unfriendly and I was very worried about it....but. ***whip crack** * i tamed those pussies.

[BROKENDOLL]

Wait. How's your dating life going, Bev?

As of January 22, 2013, I'm over it...

[SoulDischarge]

I fucking hate people. This guy, who I've never met in the flesh, was going to go to DEMF this year for the first time and we were gonna meet up and hang out. The fest is totally up his alley, and he seems like a really cool dude in general. I mentioned that maybe I'd organize a room full of homos if I could but didn't set anything in stone. So he posted something on FB about wanting to go to Miami around WMC and I commented on it saying "This better not fuck up your DEMF plans." So he messaged me saying he was still in for DEMF and might even bring a friend. I mentioned that I might be staying with this guy I hooked up with that lives in Detroit, to which he replied "Oh. Well. I guess that changes things." And then we had this long drawn out conversation where he basically guilt tripped me because he thought this was going to be some kind of exclusive date between me and him all weekend while at the same time being all fucking passive aggressive and saying shit like "This isn't your fault, I can't blame you, I just wear my heart on my sleeve." I never made it seem like it was going to be some kind of romantic getaway weekend, just that there might be the possibility of sex if there was free time and we hit it off. He said he'd have to think about it overnight and now he's definitively not going because he won't be able to figure out lodging if we're not going to be shacking up together. I tried again to convince him to go for his own goddamned benefit and stay in the really awesome hostel there. And this is what he said back to me: "It just wouldn't go down how i imagined it would. And, in this instance, I'm not really willing to compromise too much. Again, I'm sorry." Fucking childish. If he wants to be a bitch about things, his presence won't be missed. I just don't get why everyone has to be so damned melodramatic about minor things like that.

[guedita]

He sounds like someone who would cry after you fucked him anyway, Patrick. (Unless that's what you're into)

[chairmenmeow47]

well at least you dogged a bullet there. i don't think it has anything to do with his heart being on his sleeve and everything to do with him projecting his expectations onto you.

i had a slight bit of drama about my ex meeting up with me at a concert over the weekend (i was also bringing a friend and potentially meeting-up with other people, this was not exclusive either). the night before he's texting me after midnight about how he may not be able to go because his girlfriend was getting upset. and the only reason she gets upset and doesn't like me is because of whatever he has told her. i barely see this guy but maybe once a year and we hadn't even kissed in a decade. there was absolutely no reason for her to be concerned. and why put us in this situation where she now doesn't like me doesn't make any sense. just don't tell your girlfriend how great you think i am. problem solved.

[locachica73]

After a 4 month dating break I have decided to try again. I have a date on Thursday with someone who seems to be very mature. I am sure it will go horribly, but I can't help but to be slightly excited about it.

[guedita]

1. Why are you sure it will go horribly -- this isn't a good attitude

2. How does he seem mature?

[locachica73]

Previous dating experience just has me a little leary I suppose. As everyone has pointed out my picker is broken, which becomes more and more obvious with every dating adventure. He has a good job, a drivers license, a car, a house and can carry on a decent conversation, there has to be something wrong with him, right? He has kids, which is normally against my rules, but he seems to be a very good dad which I find strangly sexy.