Great that you had a nice date - they all don't have to go anywhere, sometimes getting out and just going a date is good practice.
For the people on the side of "letting someone keep you as their emergency contact is another way of prolonging the connection," um... I mean wouldn't her ex have to be a complete sociopath to actually play that card? I mean like, he'd have to be the kind of crazy where he takes a bunch of pills just to go to the hospital just to get her called?
By which I mean, wouldn't he have to be a chick?
Ha. Yeah that would be nuts. He'd never do anything intentionally, but I just don't want to be on the hook if something bad does happen, and then I'll be expected to step in and manage his life. I think it's because I'm the most stable, reliable person in his life and he knows he could count on me. But this goes back to letting him rely on me too heavily when we're not together anymore.
From you are saying, I think you should once and for all decide who gets to keep the dog, take your name off of his emergency forms, and 100% stop communication with him and his mother.
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I hear what you are saying. Unfortunately neither of us is willing to give up the dog. He has an equal claim to her since we bought her together. I could be a heinous bitch and go to court to get full ownership, but the cost of that process would be ridiculous. So here is where we are.
Sounds like someone needs a surprise puppy!
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Sounds like the dog needs a lawyer.
2 oz blended whiskey
Juice of 1/2 lemon
1/2 tsp powdered sugar
1/2 slice lemon
Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.
I mean, I think the more likely scenario for an emergency contact is "I just got into a car accident and I'm out of it, I need someone to call my family and let them know." As someone who lives across the country from the family I'd want contacted, generally speaking I have to list the person I'm having sex with, whether it be a girlfriend or one of my gay roommates.
How old is the dog? Most dogs live to be 15 years old, with some living 20+ years.(oldest dog on record was almost 30) Do you really want to be attached to each other that long? And while I am no dog expert, I am pretty sure that shared custody is not the best thing for the dog. The workplace emergency contact thing is just silly. We live in a world where being on the other side of the planet really doesn't mean much in terms of contact. In fact it almost seems counter productive to have you listed because you will essentially just be a middle man between his work and his mother. It's not like he has given you power of attorney or anything. As far as the cellphone emergency contact goes, I would have him put his new SO in there because that is really only going to be used if someone finds his lost cellphone.
We did have two dogs. The one we still have is only 2.5 yrs old. Originally if our other dog (which was originally his) hadn't died of cancer, I'm sure I would have kept the puppy and he would have kept the older one and we'd have gone our separate ways. Part of the reason I think he wanted to share was because we lost Maggie and he was still hurting from that. I'm settled in the idea that we will continue sharing the dog, and that aspect of it is going ok. She has two happy homes and the bonus is I never have to pay to put the dog in a kennel if I go out of town. However I am going to see how this other SO of his works out and gradually make the suggestion that a transition of the emergency contact is the best thing. Thanks for the input folks.
I'm never getting a pet with anyone.
I have two kids but you couldn't give me enough money to give up my dog.
Marlo not sure what you're fearing here. It may be a bit of an odd request but it doesn't seem unreasonable given the circumstances. I mean is the guy gonna go around and tell his buddies, "heh heh, yeah, i'm banging this new chick now but I still got my ex as an emergency contact on the side, heh heh."
On the hook? for what? "Joe's been in a car crash, it doesn't look good." "OK. Can I come get Fido now?"
If you decide not to do anything, you run the risk of getting ticketed by the Emergency Contact Police.
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I take it there was a certain amount of acrimony in this break-up, but not enough acrimony to make it so where you would tell him to fuck off when he asked you to do this.
Marlo, shouldn't we be talking about your new dude?
I think it's just that I'm too fucking nice. But if I'm really not obligated to do anything except reach out to his family and other friends if something happens then that's no big deal.
Jesus Christ you're the worst.
How big is his dick?