The Sex thread

[RotationSlimWang]

I've shared that story at least a few times in other threads on this board, but PER USUAL we are such a boring fucking lot that we all continue to have the same fucking conversations every couple of months and remain wildly entertained by our own lameness.

But sure, that story isn't true. This one is: getbetter and I did some serious reconnaissance weekend one and got dirty on your daughter's sleeping bag.

Oh my God please tell me that's real.

[thelastgreatman]

Okay so, when your ex pushed you through an apparently closed window... were you nekkid?

[guedita]

Nah, he had put some boxers and a shirt on me -- the ejection came later in the night, not immediately following the sex. The window was open (one of those no screen, knob turning out ones). I cut my knee on his empty glass candle holders. That I'm pretty sure some other chick had given them to him as a gift.

[amyzzz]

[ThatGirl]

You don't tell the story about finding a pot-belly pig in the bathroom of the house you were staying at ENOUGH. It kills me.

That is a great story, which I'd like to hear again in person, with inflections, in September.

[algunz]

We are going to have some good story time in the fall.

[thelastgreatman]

So what the fuck was wrong with his parents that he felt the need to throw you out a window?

Do you have any more sex stories that involve you being physically injured but not in the usual ways (i.e. sexy punches to the face)

[amyzzz]

Vomiting during sex sounds so wrong; that has not ever happened to me.

[guedita]

So what the fuck was wrong with his parents that he felt the need to throw you out a window?

They had rules, man. Sneaking out the window wasn't an isolated incident, this was more a force of habit. I had just always been more adroit at alighting.

[canexplain]

adroit at alighting
That's more impressive than your story .... cr****

[TomAz]

RON TELL US AGAIN ABOUT THE TIME YOU FUCKED THE GIRL IN THE PLANE WITH THE CARGO DOOR OPEN

[canexplain]

Old (er) news ..... cr****

[HunterGather]

So it was more that you were unsure, rather than feeling like you wouldn't have any support?

Pitcher, catcher, both, neither? When you're interested, are you aggressive like some dudes are with chicks? Would you be upset if a straight guy lead you on for, say, drinks? That's if you'd even buy someone a drink. 28, eh. When did you come out/accept/realize?

More so unsure.
Both and neither.
Not really aggressive.
And how do you mean? Like a guy just wanted to hang out and I assumed he was gay or something?
I'd say around between 19 and 21 I realized and accepted and so forth. Not really out to the whole world, but not living in a glass closet either.

[algunz]

The first time I was exposed to bondage-like sexual behavior was when my boyfriend made me lie on the floor of his dorm room, and he held my wrists still while he went down on me. That was fun, but not the best part. A mutual friend sat behind my head and held my shoulders down. She would alternate between making out with me and watching my boyfriend. She would order me not to move or make a sound. She wouldn't even let me close my eyes. If I did, she would make my boyfriend stop and she would make out with him

[Mugwog]

The first time I was exposed to bondage-like sexual behavior is when my boyfriend made me lie on the floor of his dorm room and held my wrists still while he went down on me. That was fun, but not the best part. A mutual friend sat behind my head and held my shoulders down. She would alternate between making out with me and watching my boyfriend. She would order me not to move or make a sound. She wouldn't even let me close my eyes. If I did, she would make my boyfriend stop and she would make out with him

[Neighborhood Creep]

I need more stories.

I just beat off to the Farrah Abraham porn.

[IceyHotshot]

The first time I was exposed to bondage-like sexual behavior is when my boyfriend made me lie on the floor of his dorm room and held my wrists still while he went down on me. That was fun, but not the best part. A mutual friend sat behind my head and held my shoulders down. She would alternate between making out with me and watching my boyfriend. She would order me not to move or make a sound. She wouldn't even let me close my eyes. If I did, she would make my boyfriend stop and she would make out with him

Wow, what a fantastic post.

[Neighborhood Creep]

Wow, what a fantastic post.

Way to overlook mine

[algunz]

Yours was great, creepy.

[Neighborhood Creep]

Yours was great, creepy.

Needs more detail, huh?

[VigoTheCarpathian]

Way to overlook mine

No one wants to read about your filthy rumpy pumpy creep

[algunz]

Needs more detail, huh?

A little embellishing might be useful.

[VigoTheCarpathian]

useful hu? I like where this thread is going.

[Neighborhood Creep]

No one wants to read about your filthy rumpy pumpy creep

Fresh out the shower, clean as a sanitized whistle.

[VigoTheCarpathian]

I'm closing my eyes. I see soft voluptuous boobies. My penis is growing. It's getting real big and hard. I'm running my fingers softly up and down her inner legs..up her thighs down to her ankles. I'm beginning to sweat all over my buldging muscles.

[caeden]

jesus christ. y'all blew up this thread

[SoulDischarge]

I've gone to gay cruising location and put a blindfold on and sucked anonymous cocks on multiple occasions over the last year. Although the worst part is there have been times where no one even wanted to stick their dick in my face the whole time I was there. It's kind of amazing I haven't caught more diseases. Although that whole situation kind of turns me on, most cruisey places in my town are filled with senior citizens, which doesn't turn me on at all, so that practice has fallen by the wayside. In fact, cruising in general has kind of been in remission because it's almost always a total failure; everyone is either disgusting or disinterested (or both).

[roboto]

They had rules, man. Sneaking out the window wasn't an isolated incident, this was more a force of habit. I had just always been more adroit at alighting.

adroit at alighting. yes we can all read books and shit. Making a sentence nobody understands isn't communicating, it's embracing elitist bullshit.

Those last two words describe you perfectly.

[BROKENDOLL]

jesus christ. y'all blew up this thread

I've gone to gay cruising location and put a blindfold on and sucked anonymous cocks on multiple occasions over the last year. Although the worst part is there have been times where no one even wanted to stick their dick in my face the whole time I was there. It's kind of amazing I haven't caught more diseases. Although that whole situation kind of turns me on, most cruisey places in my town are filled with senior citizens, which doesn't turn me on at all, so that practice has fallen by the wayside. In fact, cruising in general has kind of been in remission because it's almost always a total failure; everyone is either disgusting or disinterested (or both).

Okay, call me perplexed, but are you cruising into these slutty trysts with hopes of finding Mr. Right, or Mr. Right Now? It just seems to me that in order to find him, you'd have to be able to see him.. and that ain't gonna happen with a fucking blindfold on, silly. I'm actually surprised that you didn't have a cab related incident you could share with us...

[TomAz]

adroit at alighting. yes we can all read books and shit. Making a sentence nobody understands isn't communicating, it's embracing elitist bullshit.

Those last two words describe you perfectly.

I understood the sentence just fine. No need to dumb down the conversation for the retarded fucks.

Those last two words describe you perfectly.