it's so true...
So when white people go to concerts at smaller venues, what to do they do? They stand still! This is an important part of white concert going as it enables you to focus on the music, and it will prevent drawing excess attention to you. Remember, at a concert everyone is watching you just waiting for you to try to start dancing. Then they will make fun of you.The most horrific recent example is Trucker hats, that shockingly went from mainstream in the 80s to Ironic in the early 2000s back to mainstream, at which point they are no longer rare or unique. Once something reaches this stage, irony cannot be restored for 10 years.But BE WARNED, talking about Indie Music with white people is perhaps the most dangerous subject you touch upon. One false move and you will lose their respect and admiration forever. Here are some general rules
* Bands that have had their songs in an Apple ad are still marginally acceptable
* Bands that have had their songs in ads for other companies are not acceptable
* If you mention a band you like and the other person has heard of them, you lose. They own you. It is essential that you like the most obscure music possible.
Remember, popular artists can turn unpopular in a heartbeat (Ryan Adams, Bright Eyes, The Strokes), so you would be best to stick to the following statements: “I love the Arcade Fire,” “I still think the Montreal scene is the best in the world,” “I would die without Stereogum or Fluxblog“* and “Joanna Newsom is maybe the most original artist today.”Counting the number of black friends is then clearly a divine imperative. The number of black friends white people possess also illustrates their comfort with black culture. Here’s a handy guide to the number system:
1—The white novice. This black friend is the gateway to helping white people understand gang signs and Vietnamese beauty supply stores. This black friend is probably the only black friend for many white people and when they all hang out (because white people hang out) they bring their “mutual” black friend with them.
2—The white black club-goer. Two black friends serve as bodyguards when white people go to black clubs to see how exactly one “pops, drops and locks” it.
3 -4—The white BET-er. See Justin Timberlake/ Robin Thicke/ Jon B for more information. For old school reference, see Michael McDonald.
5 and up—Impossible.