Amy you slut.
had a friend in grade school who thought black babies were black because they came out of the pooper.
What a shitty kid.
When I was 16, I was home alone during summer vacation one day and browsed through my yearbook looking at pretty girls. One sophomore in particular caught my fancy and she had a unique enough last name, so I looked through the phone book and found just one listing with that last name. The conversation went something like this:
Me: Is this (whatever her name was)?
Me: Hi, this is Rick. I go to UHS, too. Do you want to hang out at the mall?
Her: Um, no.
Me: Ok, thanks.
Upcoming: 04/10/15-04/12/15 - Coachella Weekend One; Foo Fighters - 09/27/15 (Isleta Amphitheater - Albuquerque, NM)
I itched my anus for a straight minute through my boxers before hopping in the shower today. Felt great
Did you smell it?
My cock has a fin.
2 oz blended whiskey
Juice of 1/2 lemon
1/2 tsp powdered sugar
1/2 slice lemon
Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.
I really like the smell of the bread aisle in stores.
OMG UR SO KINKY LOLZ
I flicked a lit cig into a crowd of people last night
found out that my parents cleaning lady has been stealing alcohol from their liquor cabinet, so i emptied one of the bottles of vodka she's been diluting and replaced it with water and rubbing alcohol. i am looking forward to her next visit.
July 16 - Cough
July 19 - Dragged Into Sunlight
July 29 - Inter Arma
August 12-14 - Migration Fest
August 16 - Monolord
August 26-28 - Psycho LV
September 7 - Cobalt
September 12 - Kraftwerk
September 17 - Melvins
September 20 - Wolves In The Throne Room
September 21 - Kanye West
September 30-October 2 - ACL wk.1
October 7-9 - ACL wk.2
October 11 - Failure
October 21 - Sleep
October 22 - Sleep
October 23 - Sleep
November 6 - Sia
November 12 - Black Sabbath
hope you dont poison your parents