You also aren't a girl, though. (Right?)
You also aren't a girl, though. (Right?)
I was reading this at work, and started to wonder how I would handle something like this? Has anyone come across this, where your child gets bullied, or does the bullying?
A young man taking a stand against bullying at his school was apparently roughed up by fellow students as a local TV crew was preparing to interview him.
"The student came up to me and pushed me out of the way and said, 'What are you recording?'" Preston Deener told WHAG. "All of a sudden, the student was chasing me and I needed some help."
The incident happened as WHAG cameras and reporter Katie Kyros were preparing to interview Preston, a sophomore at Brunswick High School in Frederick, Md.
Kyros described the events:
"I had my camera fully set up. I was getting ready to interview Preston and his friend, and the boys just didn't seem to care. A group of three boys came up, and one of them just lunged toward Preston, started pushing him and hitting him in the head so quickly. I was shocked. They didn't even care that I was standing there and yelling about it. … It was all on camera. They have no shame about it."
However, Kyros later points out the camera was not recording when the alleged assault took place. But crews did capture images of the boys approaching and Preston running away after the incident.
Preston went into the school to report the bullying, as is district policy. He was recently suspended for three days after an incident last week in which, instead of telling administrators, he fought a student after being tackled at school, WHAG reports. Preston says he's been a victim of bullying for years, including cyberbullying.
That's why Kyros was on site to talk to Preston.
Cheryl Deener , Preston's mother, hopes the recent incident caught mostly on video will nudge the school district to take action against this bully, WHAG reports.
The TV station is cooperating with the school district and has turned over a copy of the video so the school can identify the young men involved.
"A full investigation is step No. 1, to find out what's going on and what happened," Michael Doerrer with Frederick County Public Schools told WHAG.
Cheryl Deener has started a Facebook page in support of her son through which she hopes parents of bullied teens can share support and ideas, ABC2 WMAR reports. Recently, she got the district to reverse a ruling that kept Preston from attending homecoming because of his suspension, ABC2 reports.
This is yet another notable case in which a parent is seeking public support for a child who has stood up against apparent bullying—only to get punished for retaliating.
Randy Duke of Victoria, Texas, pickets his son's middle school, carrying a sign that reads, "Bullying victims are punished here."
Duke's 14-year-old son, Max, was suspended for allegedly fighting with a student who had been bullying him at the school, Duke said.
In his TV interview, Preston said eloquently, "You've got to have one heart and stand up for someone who's getting bullied, and it needs to stop."
My kids have not been bullied nor have they bullied anyone themselves. This would be hard for me to deal with. If it was really bad, I would just have them change schools.
My 12 year old daughter is obsessed with My Little Pony right now and wants all the MLP toys to play with, but Jacob thinks playing with those toys is regressive, and we should not allow her to get anymore toys because she should be too old for this. What do you guys think?
Are you positive she wants them "to play with" and not to collect? She might just be a nerd.
I don't think it's up to parents to decide what kinds of hobbies their children should have. If she wants to collect and play with or display MLP toys, then that should be to her. Let her decide when she's too old to play with toys. Trying to force her out of childlike things isn't particularly healthy. Plus, she's only 12! She's still a kid.
She still plays with them. And she draws them. And she wants to be Fluttershy from MLP for Halloween.
Amy, is your daughter responsible for her own money and budgeting? I mean as long as she's willing to spend her own money on something like this, it's great for her to learn based on the choices she makes, not on the limitations others impose.
I actively played with action figures until i was 14 or 15 and still collect toys of various kinds, though not at the level i did when i was younger. I think it's good to encourage creative things like that for as long as possible. Kids grow up too fast nowadays, so let them play with toys!
My wife's ex-husband constantly fails to live up to his portion of the parenting bargain. Whether it be child support, problems with his home (No AC, which is a necessity in Tucson, a broken window in her room), passing her off to his sister, not knowing when to put the teenager that still lives in his body aside... he really doesn't seem to fully grasp the parenting concept.
The child support isn't a huge deal to me. We are far from loaded, but we make enough to where we don't need his money, but it is also a tad frustrating to know that the only time he saves money to do stuff with her, it isn't to live up to his end of the responsibilities, but it's to take her somewhere like Disneyland or the State Fair or something a kid would enjoy. That seems all fine and dandy but at one point, his motorcycle broke down and decided it was better to put money into getting into another motorcycle rather than help pay some of the bills like he should. He rarely pays for any of her child care, health costs, clothes and leaves us with the bill and in turn, we end up having to delay any plans to do something fun and exciting for her because we are spending so much of our paychecks on her necessities while he saves that money. I think he does that to look like the "good parent" (yes he has been proven to be THAT immature) so she still wants to see him, but she's starting to pick up on certain portions of his BS because she is getting older and smarter.
He also displays extremely selfish behavior. He wanted to see an R rated movie (pretty sure it was Inception, not quite sure) on the night it came out, which was on a night he had her, on a school night and the movie didn't start until midnight. You would think he would exercise patience and see it at a more convenient and appropriate time for himself and even if he wanted to take her, that's his daughter and he can choose to do as he pleases, but so late on a school night is unacceptable in my book especially when she told us she didn't even want to go see the movie and told him this multiple times.
On top of that, a while back we found out that he took her around on his crotch-rocket in his neighborhood, which is just ridiculous simply due to the fact that he is a complete idiot of a driver regardless of what vehicle he is utilizing. What's even more frustrating is that she said she wasn't wearing any sort of helmet or padding. She played it down at first, but when we told her she wasn't in trouble she started opening up about other things he does while he is in her custody.
His sister - who happens to be a welfare mother that possesses no responsibility - actually dropped her and her cousin off at a house where, according to my step-daughter, had no supervision. The adults that were there stayed in the bedroom behind closed doors, failing to come out and check on the kids. I am also finding out that he has been passing her off to his sister at least once every one-to-two weeks, which would be fine except that she only gets two days with him and she would complain that she never gets to see him.
She is now getting to the point where she is being very short with him in phone conversations and wants to come home to us early more often than not. My wife is continuously being patient with him because she's afraid that elevating her stress will cause her MS to act up again (and that's an entirely different issue altogether that can cause added frustration to our marriage and we try to avoid that as much as possible), but certain things are beginning to really piss her off with him.
As a step-parent, am I overstepping boundaries if I tell my wife she needs to finally take legal action? He doesn't pay child support and her living conditions over there are poor and he does very little to fix them despite having a steady job. I know that deep down the guy loves his daughter, but he never seems to fully grasp the concept of being a parent and I am afraid his lack of responsibility is going to hurt her either physically or emotionally in the long run. My wife and I are fully capable of raising her on our own and given his actions and lack of child support payments and unwillingness to improve his living conditions, I am pretty sure she could get full custody if she wants.
Yes, she should take legal action ASAP.
b) file for emergency full custody. Like this week. If the kid doesn't seem to want to be there, there's something going on
c) get an attorney. It's one thing to be a deadbeat and not pay child support. It's quite another to have your child in an unsafe environment. The stress of not knowing whether or not my kid is going to be injured when she leaves the house would be much less than the stress of having to take him to court IMO.
I agree with the others. Get a lawyer ASAP.
Kids are cool, it's when they turn into adults lolz, my youngest has just hooked up with a guy from Boulder that is a chef so that's cool, my adopted got her SECOND bronze star, and my oldest has great kids, life works out sometimes.... cr*****
Yes, get a lawyer. I would think that hearing what your legal options are and how best to keep your daughter safe would be better for your stress levels than feeling angry and helpless. Save the fight for court; physical altercations solve nothing and may harm your case.
I should probably clarify that I haven't had any sort of altercation with him in nearly 7 years. It all happened very early in my relationship with her. He likes to antagonize people until they reach their boiling point and then runs off. He actually tried getting a restraining order on me once but his attempt failed because the judge told him that he would not reward an instigator. My wife also had a restraining order on him for a year out of safety to their daughter because he doesn't seem to have a filter at all when he's around her.
A lot of these instances have occurred over an extended time-span, but my post this morning was sparked by his daughter wanting to come home a day early and her virtually not speaking to him when he called last night. It was like she didn't even care.
My main concern is that, while I don't like him at all, I can tell she is getting more hurt over the years at his part-time involvement and I care about how SHE feels. I told my wife if we could just remove him from the equation everyone's life would be easier, but I don't want my step-daughter holding anything against me for "running her dad off".
Fwiw: +20 points to you for being a good step-parent and giving a shit about the well being of your partner's child.
You may not have to get a lawyer, as it sounds like your step-daughter is growing tired of her dad's shit and she's getting to the age where she will probably cut him off herself. He will have to improve his own habits before he is welcomed back into her life.
The last year and a half have been the greatest years of my life so far. I have so many trips planned, started a new business, and buying a new house coming spring/summer. So kids are starting to come into the picture, but I really enjoy life now and do not want kids to ruin this high. I'm selfish, kids are gross, I have the same feeling towards pets. They are awesome but 12-14 years is long enough. They stink and say stupid shit......ugh I want like two of em, but I want them to only come around like twice a week. I know my wife feels the same way...........fuck.
i totally thought you were gonna say she was knocked up
No no no no. The making of nonexistent children also is a point of awesome selfishness. Fuck it. I don't want kids. My family name dies here.
I'm just going to be the awesome uncle.
Adopt/Foster. Pretty sure they come with a return policy.
You sort of alluded to it, but does your wife really feel the same?
GiT, your situation totally sucks. Have you been able to make any progress in getting a lawyer?
Our 10 ½ year old daughter loves soccer and loves track. Its track-season and she has practice Mon, Wed, and Thurs from 4:30-6. She also wants to join a weekly soccer camp during the spring that is either Tue, Wed, or both, from 6-7:30. I’m supportive if she wants to do 1 ½ hours of soccer directly after 1 ½ hours of track, but I have no idea if that starts to test the physical limitations of a 10 ½ year old.
Is 4 days in a row of intense 1 ½ hour exercise too much? Or would skipping Tuesday and having 3 hours of activity be too much on Wednesday? Or should we just be totally supportive of this, let her do it all, and only start pulling back if it’s too grueling or if we find that she’s too tired?