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Thread: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

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    Question Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Coachella virgin here, and this may seem like a ridiculous concern but I'm worried about being too short and not being able to see anything. I'm 5'1", and I've heard that the stage can be pretty hard to see. Thoughts, any tips from fellow shorties?

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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    ill put you on my shoulders
    Everyones a Photographer.

  3. #3
    Coachella Junkie heart cooks brain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

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    Old Gay Guy gaypalmsprings's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    The life of a short gal: attending a concert.

    I am short.

    I mean, not dangerously short. I donít run a risk of poking my eye out on a door handle or anything like that. But short nevertheless. As in, if Iím not wearing heels, I can stand straight up from my seat on an airplane and not hit my head on the console above me.

    Those of you who know what Iím referring to will agree: thatís short.

    Iíve no particular issue with my height. At times I wish my legs were longer, because skirts look ghastly on me, but thatís about it. I donít actually wish to be taller, except on those rare occasions when Rand puts the cereal on the top shelf, and I canít find my stepping stool.

    Oh, and during concerts. Because concerts, when youíre 5í2″? Those suck beyond belief. Here, in brief, is what itís like:

    Arrive at venue. Suddenly become aware that nearly all of your friends are absurdly tall. Seemingly at the same moment, they notice your height for the first time. They stare at you blankly, with an expression that reads, ďHow did I never notice before that sheís a pygmy?Ē

    After a few seconds, you friend will utter the phrase that youíve heard time and again Ė the one that is always on your mind: ďAre you going to be able to see?Ē

    You shrug, and say your are going to be fine, because that seems easier than screaming, ďWHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK?Ē and insisting they carry you on their shoulders.

    Folks begin filter in. Claustrophobia ensues, as you become intimately acquainted with the middle of peopleís backs.


    Every concert I've been to, EVER.
    -

    Suddenly, there is clapping and thunderous applause. This is the only thing to alert you to the fact that the musician has come on stage, because visual cues are unavailable to you.

    Apparently something is happening. Music is being played by someone, somewhere. Wait, whatís this?

    You can see something.

    YES. SORT OF. YOU CAN SORT OF SEE SOMETHING.

    -

    Wait, who is that? Is that a bassist? God damn it.

    You crane your neck in a vain attempt to see something else, and end up bumping into the woman next to you. She is roughly 2 inches taller than you, and in the concert hierarchy, this makes her your superior. The look she gives you confirms this fact.

    Your calves begin to ache. Looking down, you notice youíve been standing on your tippy toes without realizing it. You stop, because it makes no difference.

    Oh, Christ. Alright, who farted? They realize thatís like, SIX INCHES FROM YOUR FACE, RIGHT?

    Fart in retaliation, despite the fact that you will endure the brunt of it.

    Decide to use your camera in order to catch a glimpse of whatís going on. Holding in high above your head, you take a picture.


    God damn it.
    -

    You try again.


    Well, shit.
    -

    Apparently all the other short people had the same idea, too. Contemplate asking your petite brethren to join you in some sort of human pyramid. Insist that everyone will have a chance at the top, and that you should have it first, since it was your idea. Once you reach the top, you will refuse to give up your temporary stature as an altitudinal queen. Those at the bottom of the pyramid, angry that you renegged on your promise, will shift enough to send you toppling to the ground, a dangerous 5í6″ away.

    Decide against the pyramid idea.

    Attempt to take another photo. This time, you actually got something!

    -

    Zoom in.

    -

    Zoom in a little further.

    -

    Wait, is that Stevie effing WONDER? Youíve been at a STEVIE EFFING WONDER CONCERT AND YOUíVE ONLY JUST SEEN HIM NOW?

    Well, in all fairness, itís not like he can see you, either.

    Oh, honey, no. You did not just make that joke. I let the early one about pygmys slide, but seriously? First short jokes, now blind jokes? That is NOT okay.

    Wait Ö are you fighting with yourself in the middle of a blog post?

    No.

    Yes.

    Iím confused. Back to the concert.

    Contemplate weaving through the crowd to get to the front, but realize that while your petite stature would make it easy to do that, you arenít entirely sure you could see anything once you got there.

    Plus, thatís like, 100 feet away. Which is a long distance for someone with short legs.

    Besides, if that one person just moved. Youíd be able to see everything. But they wonít. Theyíre just standing there on their incredibly long legs and you canít see anything except -

    Oh. My. God.

    They moved.

    THEY MOVED.

    You have a clear view. You can actually see the stage. Itís amazing. Itís beautiful. Itís like Moses parting the Red Sea. YOU CAN SEE AND OH GOD ITíS SO BEAUT-

    Nevermind. They moved back.

    Sigh.

    Whatís this? One of your friends has offered to pick you up? Awww, thatís sweet. You laugh, because despite being 6í2″, they weigh roughly what you do. You pat them on the arm and thank them for what is an adorable but impossible-by-the-limitations-of-physics offer.

    Decide that seeing a concert isnít that imperative, anyway. Start to dance. Inadvertently hit the tall people around you in the groin and lower back, because all your moves are borrowed from Elaine Benes. The Amazonians who youíve accidentally whacked give you dirty looks. You are able to avoid them easily, because making eye contact with the league of giants around you would involve some serious neck craning.

    And you? You are not here to crane your neck. You are here to boogie.

    What? The concertís over? Already? Sigh. Time to head home. You pile into a cab with your never-realized-they-were-so-tall friends. You offer to sit bitch, because itís not that big a deal for you. Nevertheless, this makes you a saint in the eyes of all your friends, who have yet to realize that even in the middle seat, you have more leg room than they do.

    Smile brightly, because really, being short? Itís not that bad.
    Quote Originally Posted by SepaGroove View Post
    You shouldn't feel uncool for not going to EDC, you should feel uncool because you are uncool.

  5. #5
    Cobra psychic friend's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    .................................................. ..............
    She added the phrase "meany head" to my profile.
    I hardly think I'm an attention whore.
    I train birds of prey and am I licensed falconer

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    Member TheWatcher's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Ha Ha, 5' 1" does not make one a dwarf. Depending on one's racial background it might be average.

    Only advice I can give is to either try to get to the rail or be back far enough that the crowd thins out and you can see--this works best for big acts that have the video screens going.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Quote Originally Posted by lexilou View Post
    Coachella virgin here, and this may seem like a ridiculous concern but I'm worried about being too short and not being able to see anything. I'm 5'1", and I've heard that the stage can be pretty hard to see. Thoughts, any tips from fellow shorties?
    Darn, those screens they have everywhere wont help for much then.

  8. #8

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Just don't ask the tall person who is standing in front of you to move, or try to push through them.

    But, if you politely ask "excuse me, I'm sorry to bother you but you are much taller than I. Would it trouble you if I stood in front of you for this next act? I would really appreciate the gesture." They likely will switch places with you.

    I'm 6-3 and have had everything happen to me from the polite way (those people I gladly switched with), to someone standing behind me hitting me with a bottle because they told me to "move to the back so others can see." That person got an inadvertent elbow of which I'm sure they understood because they stopped hitting the bottle on my shoulder.

    Just be polite if you can't see. It likely will work out.
    Last edited by gam3g3ni3; 04-05-2014 at 05:07 PM.

  9. #9

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    You have a few options . Stay far back where it's not completely packed , use the video screens , get to the rail up front , get to a secondary rail by the soundboards. Being in the closer areas where it's packed would not be good for you. The Sahara tent will be the easiest place to see from any spot. The Yuma should also be no problem. My gf is short so I try to do these things too.
    Spicy pie is mainstream shit.

  10. #10
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Lexi, I'm 5'6-ish, and I can probably only see maybe 50% of the time at any given concert. Coachella is no different. With the smaller bands who play early in the day, you'll probably have no problem, but for more popular/crowded stuff as the night progresses you may definitely have difficulty seeing (and if someone big/tall is standing in front of you, that will probably block both the stage and the adjacent video screens) -- there's always the option of just moving way to the back of the crowd, although at that point you may not be able to see every little detail.

    If you are content standing there and enjoying the sound of the music, then I don't think it's a problem. However, if not being able to see is going to make you extremely frustrated every time your line of sight is blocked, you should probably seriously consider whether this is the best use of your time.

  11. #11

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    I am 5'3. I can never see at concerts, I seriously can relate to that blog post someone posted on here. I have just learned to live with it and have a great time at shows, and just feel like being able to see anything is just a little added extra bonus every once in a while.
    Just try to get a view of the screens. Sometimes I can see those.

  12. #12
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    I'm barely 4 ft 11" so I get this, and I always make sure I get to the stage early. If it's a set I really care about, I'm there by the time the act performing prior is done and when people move out I usually get a decent spot. And most really tall people will help you out if you ask nicely, since I wouldn't block their view at all being in front of them.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
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    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  13. #13

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    There are also speaker towers and the tent posts that have railing that can provide space between you and the next person so you can see better.

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    Member baily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Your height is gonna be an issue...I'm 5'10 and I have to move around to see.

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    old school DFrank's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    5'1"? Yes, I can help you out. But first...post your picture with a banana for scale?

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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Quote Originally Posted by gaypalmsprings View Post
    The life of a short gal: attending a concert.
    This was amazing. Thank you for this.

  17. #17
    Member anonimouse's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    left out the part where the short person was carrying a large purse and giving tall people around them PJ's the entire show.
    Originally Posted by menikmati
    I'm locking this fucker.

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    old school Cheddar's Cousin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    You're gonna see lots of BALLZZZ!
    Youth, you son of a bitch, where did you go?

    Quote Originally Posted by Emma Ocean View Post
    so I assume you've never been cunt punched at a festival? Well lucky you!

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    Member djbionik's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    I totally understand. I'm 5'1 too. It's maddening to travel so far for an expensive as fuck weekend, get so close and still not being able to see.
    I wear flatform shoes, use binoculars, and once I crafted a periscope out of a cereal box. Those are practical solutions, in addition to what everyone else says. It's a real thing, I know. If you do get on someone's shoulders cash that favor in for the length of just one song at the most. Don't be afraid to climb the side rails at the tents, it'll be the best view you'll get all weekend, but careful, it's a long fall!
    02,06,07,08,10,11,13,

  20. #20

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Oh I hear you. I'm 4'11. Boyfriend is 5'0. Its easy for us to snake through the crowd, so I like to just get as close to the stage as possible.

  21. #21
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Quote Originally Posted by giraffegiraffe View Post
    Oh I hear you. I'm 4'11. Boyfriend is 5'0. Its easy for us to snake through the crowd, so I like to just get as close to the stage as possible.
    I find this amusing considering your screen name.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

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    Member Wonderbot's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Everyone's given the practical advice here.

    Now for PROTIPS:

    1. Aim for the sound stage. If you secure a spot in front of the sound stage, either left front, center front, or right front, you're usually in a good viewing spot.
    2. If there's a fence, try to get next to it. Example the main stage last year had a fence keeping people from getting further than the Sound Stage. This is a great area for short people because there's an empty space between that and the next fence for staff to walk through. Gives a great view for shorties.
    3. Going to a stage at an 45degree angle from the sides. Usually not a lot of people on the sides, and you can still see/hear.

    Source:
    I'm 6'6" with a 5'1" girlfriend
    With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams; it is still a beautiful world.
    Coachella: 08, 09, 10, 11, 12w1, 12w2, 13w1, 14w2
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  23. #23

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Wow! You are an amazing writer that was hilarioius

  24. #24

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    This is amazing. Thank you for sharing that--you are the kind of person that is going to make this weekend even more awesome!

  25. #25

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    I don't think that poster wrote that, this is where its from:
    http://www.everywhereist.com/the-lif...ert/#more-3674

  26. #26

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    I'm 5'-0" and when I can't see shit I just dance my ass off... maybe if people around me see me dancing like a loon they will partake lol

  27. #27
    Member amma_sol's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    I took this last year, this chick was awesome.

  28. #28

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Quote Originally Posted by amma_sol View Post
    I took this last year, this chick was awesome.

    Hahaha they let you bring that? Holy shit I am so taking one with me!!!!!! YAY no longer seeing someone's ass!

  29. #29
    Old Gay Guy gaypalmsprings's Avatar
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    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Adapt...








    or if you feel like jumping, too

    Quote Originally Posted by SepaGroove View Post
    You shouldn't feel uncool for not going to EDC, you should feel uncool because you are uncool.

  30. #30

    Default Re: Seriously concerned about my height--am i too short to see anything?

    Security: "..."

    Coachella goer: "What? These are my real shoes, I wear them everywhere!"

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