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Thread: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

  1. #241
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Tell me about the stupid phrases your boss uses

    Circle back around
    low hanging fruit
    not enough bandwith
    out of my scope
    regroup after lunch

    KEEP IT GOIN!!

  2. #242
    old school RageAgainstTheAoki's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Can we talk LinkedIn? Has anyone used it to land a job? I have to admit that I've really neglected my LI profile over the past three years. I pretty much did nothing with it other than occasionally add people who sent me requests. I've since updated my work history, skills, given endorsements to several current and former colleagues--some of whom have already given me endorsements, and joined several industry networking groups. I've also added some former and current colleagues I should have added months and even years ago!

    I just applied for a position at what is widely considered the number 1 brand in my industry. I currently work for the number 2 brand, but I have zero contacts at number 1. However, I'm almost certain that some of the C-level execs from my current company know the top brass at the prospective company. So, naturally, I've asked my current and former colleagues if they have any contacts at this company that they'd be willing to introduce me to. Those introductions may happen via LinkedIn or email--it's up to the contacts.

    But, how do you guys feel about essentially "cold calling" people at the new company via LinkedIn? My skills/background are really well aligned with this position's requirements, but I also know that I will be facing a ton of competition. Anything to help separate me from the pile would be great. Is it kosher to send a message to, say, an HR manager/recruiter at this company? The idea would be to briefly introduce myself, drop 2 or 3 bullet-points on my history/relevance and let them know I have great references from some well known figures in our industry. What about doing something similar with the hiring manager(s) in the marketing department? Would that be considered an affront to the HR department's gate-keeping status--you know, looking as though I'm trying to bypass HR. Note: I'm not suggesting I do this instead of the company's regular application process on its website, but in addition to that.

  3. #243
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Quote Originally Posted by RageAgainstTheAoki View Post
    Can we talk LinkedIn? Has anyone used it to land a job? I have to admit that I've really neglected my LI profile over the past three years. I pretty much did nothing with it other than occasionally add people who sent me requests. I've since updated my work history, skills, given endorsements to several current and former colleagues--some of whom have already given me endorsements, and joined several industry networking groups. I've also added some former and current colleagues I should have added months and even years ago!

    I just applied for a position at what is widely considered the number 1 brand in my industry. I currently work for the number 2 brand, but I have zero contacts at number 1. However, I'm almost certain that some of the C-level execs from my current company know the top brass at the prospective company. So, naturally, I've asked my current and former colleagues if they have any contacts at this company that they'd be willing to introduce me to. Those introductions may happen via LinkedIn or email--it's up to the contacts.

    But, how do you guys feel about essentially "cold calling" people at the new company via LinkedIn? My skills/background are really well aligned with this position's requirements, but I also know that I will be facing a ton of competition. Anything to help separate me from the pile would be great. Is it kosher to send a message to, say, an HR manager/recruiter at this company? The idea would be to briefly introduce myself, drop 2 or 3 bullet-points on my history/relevance and let them know I have great references from some well known figures in our industry. What about doing something similar with the hiring manager(s) in the marketing department? Would that be considered an affront to the HR department's gate-keeping status--you know, looking as though I'm trying to bypass HR. Note: I'm not suggesting I do this instead of the company's regular application process on its website, but in addition to that.
    The best thing to do is to follow the HR process and if you have made a formal application that is the way to go. For you to reach out directly to others in the company could be perceived as trying to move around this process. But what is way more powerful is to get an endorsement from someone else in your industry, that can reach out to one of their contacts at the new company, and vouch for you by saying - "this is someone I know of, and I think they would be a great fit." If your contacts are willing to make introductions either via Linkedin or email, have the message come from your contact. In an email they could cc you and just say, " this person would be a great for the open position you posted, and I wanted to make sure you were in touch." Many companies ( like mine ) have programs for employee referrals and sometimes there is a policy about how to handle referrals when they come in. That may help you stand out. Or I would suggest after making your formal application to HR that you follow up about a week after to ask the status of the role and your application. Do it by phone directly to HR and you can find out where they are in the process and whether the interview cycle has begun.
    Good luck! And by the way, IMO Linkedin is great, it's my primary source of candidates when I need to fill a job.
    Last edited by ThatGirl; 02-28-2014 at 03:56 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  4. #244
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Quote Originally Posted by PlayaDelWes View Post
    If you are going to host a call with 60+ attendees, please turn off the announcement that tells everybody's name when they join or leave the conference.
    They normally have mandatory mute on our conference calls for training, or high attendee calls, but the other day we used a phone dial in combined with MS Lync for the call, and 1/2 the folks didn't bother to mute. One guy did a full on belch right in the middle of a presentation. Such a joke.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  5. #245
    Coachella Junkie PlayaDelWes's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    They normally have mandatory mute on our conference calls for training, or high attendee calls, but the other day we used a phone dial in combined with MS Lync for the call, and 1/2 the folks didn't bother to mute. One guy did a full on belch right in the middle of a presentation. Such a joke.
    Some lady didn't mute when she went off on somebody and cussed them out for a full minute in what appeared to be a roadrage incident during one of our all-hands calls. She's not around anymore.
    Last edited by PlayaDelWes; 02-28-2014 at 07:58 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by dj12inches View Post
    What makes me qualified? I've watched EVERY fucking episode of American Idol, and every single episode of The Voice...Forget that I won departmental music awards when I was in the 8th grade choir.

  6. #246
    Member Sheldorrr's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    My current position (which is just as boring as every other job I've had but pays a lot better) happened through a Linkedin application. It's a great resource - particularly if you have a technical background and often saves the time of filling out apps. You can crank out like twelve linked in applications in 5 minutes.
    CHECK OUT HOW ME AND MY BORING FRIENDS EXPERIENCE COACHELLA!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7FL8IWFxMU

  7. #247
    old school RageAgainstTheAoki's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    The best thing to do is to follow the HR process and if you have made a formal application that is the way to go. For you to reach out directly to others in the company could be perceived as trying to move around this process. But what is way more powerful is to get an endorsement from someone else in your industry, that can reach out to one of their contacts at the new company, and vouch for you by saying - "this is someone I know of, and I think they would be a great fit." If your contacts are willing to make introductions either via Linkedin or email, have the message come from your contact. In an email they could cc you and just say, " this person would be a great for the open position you posted, and I wanted to make sure you were in touch." Many companies ( like mine ) have programs for employee referrals and sometimes there is a policy about how to handle referrals when they come in. That may help you stand out. Or I would suggest after making your formal application to HR that you follow up about a week after to ask the status of the role and your application. Do it by phone directly to HR and you can find out where they are in the process and whether the interview cycle has begun.
    Good luck! And by the way, IMO Linkedin is great, it's my primary source of candidates when I need to fill a job.

    ThatGirl - Thanks v. much. While having a connection to introduce you is obviously great, what if that isn't an option? In the particular case I mentioned, I do have the relevant connections and have asked them to make intros to key people in marketing and HR via LinkedIn. But, there are going to be cases in which I don't have any direct or secondary contacts at a potential employer. In those cases, would a brief message via LinkedIn to an HR manager or recruiter--not the hiring manager(s) in my actual department--be kosher in your opinion? It would be a v. brief, ala:
    "Hi, I'm Sigourney Weaver, I recently applied for the marketing dir position. I have 7+ yrs exp in integrated marketing for a similar co where I designed and executed the brand's larget b2c ad campaign in its history. I just wanted to introduce myself and answer any questions you may have about my work history. Thanks for your time. Regards, Sigourney"

    I've read interviews with recruiters from major companies who say they welcome LinkedIn contact from potential applicants, but I have no idea how representative those claims are. I don't want to cross a line, but I also don't want to miss out on opportunities that might benefit from a slight nudge. Is it a hard and fast rule to never, under any circumstances reach out in this manner? Welcome others thoughts/feedback as well. Poor ThatGirl is doing all the heavy lifting in this thread--much appreciated, TG!

  8. #248
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    personally, i absolutely hate when people go outside the HR process or do follow-up calls/emails about interviews. unless we have some sort of personal connection, it's annoying, it wastes my time, and puts me in the awkward position of having to come up with an HR appropriate way of saying "thanks, but you need to follow the HR process or wait for a response".
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  9. #249
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Quote Originally Posted by RageAgainstTheAoki View Post
    "Hi, I'm Sigourney Weaver, I recently applied for the marketing dir position. I have 7+ yrs exp in integrated marketing for a similar co where I designed and executed the brand's larget b2c ad campaign in its history. I just wanted to introduce myself and answer any questions you may have about my work history. Thanks for your time. Regards, Sigourney"
    I completely agree with Ivy about time wasting - and truthfully, I would think Ms. Sigourney Weaver was being a giant brown-noser and it would annoy me. Consider the flow of email and crap applicants we as HR folks go through every day; I get so many shit respondents to postings, that I have to look at only to roll my eyes, having one more email just adds to the list of stuff that goes in the delete pile. But I do feel follow-up by phone on the status of your application to the appropriate HR person will be far more effective, unless you can get another person to provide you a direct referral that will be relevant and valued to the prospective employer.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  10. #250
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Quote Originally Posted by RageAgainstTheAoki View Post
    Poor ThatGirl is doing all the heavy lifting in this thread--much appreciated, TG!
    No problem - I have created this thread which is specifically for job search inquiries.

    http://www.coachella.com/forum/showt...ns-Help-Thread
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  11. #251
    old school RageAgainstTheAoki's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Cheers. Appreciate the candid feedback.

  12. #252
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Our Admin Assistant is purposely being mean to be. I'm about to fire her.

  13. #253
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    What's she doing !!!!!! ??? !!

    8/16: Anthony Naples, Maxmillion Dunbar @ f8
    8/18: Man Man @ The Chapel
    8/23-8/24: FYF Fest
    8/30: Peaking Lights @ The Chapel
    9/3: Bear in Heaven @ The Independent
    9/24 - 28: Decibel Festival
    10/5: The War on Drugs, Cass McCombs @ The Fillmore
    10/18-19: Treasure Island Music Festival

  14. #254
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Here, do this detailed task on this project you haven't been on. have it done in two days.

    Yes sir.

    Sometimes this shit gets stressful.

  15. #255

    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    I just got an 8% raise.

  16. #256
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    congratulations!
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  17. #257
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    yay, got more work assigned to me.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Which healthcare provider will euthanize you the fastest as a service to society?
    9/2 Bear in Heaven@Echoplex - 9/4 Phantogram@Fox Pomona - 9/6 Atmosphere@Palladium - 9/10 Britney Spears - 9/18 Fatboy Slim@Shrine - 9/22 Interpol@Fox Pomona - 9/23 La Roux@Fonda - 9/25 Simian Mobile Disco@El Rey - 9/26 Die Antwoord@Observatory - 10/8 Gus Gus@Roxy - 10/10 Twin Shadow@Glass House - 10/12,19,26 IAMX@Complex - 10/24 Placebo@Club Nokia - 10/25 Superhumanoids@Palladium - 10/27 Tycho@Glass House -

  18. #258
    Coachella Junkie PlayaDelWes's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Trying to convince people that summing a series of quarterly variances only gives you the final quarter vs. the first quarter and to get a year over year variance they first need to sum the years and then subtract.
    Quote Originally Posted by dj12inches View Post
    What makes me qualified? I've watched EVERY fucking episode of American Idol, and every single episode of The Voice...Forget that I won departmental music awards when I was in the 8th grade choir.

  19. #259
    Coachella Junkie PlayaDelWes's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    When any of you reach the cap of your vacation accrual, do you feel the need that you absolutely must take time off so that you don’t lose out on additional accrual?
    Quote Originally Posted by dj12inches View Post
    What makes me qualified? I've watched EVERY fucking episode of American Idol, and every single episode of The Voice...Forget that I won departmental music awards when I was in the 8th grade choir.

  20. #260
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    that has never happened to me and probably never will lol. most of the execs here end up taking a lot of time off at the end of the fiscal year to not hit the cap.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  21. #261
    Coachella Junkie PlayaDelWes's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    I guess it's more relevant in non "use it or lose it" states. I have an employee who, on a regular basis, resentfully takes random days off so he doesn't stop accruing.
    Quote Originally Posted by dj12inches View Post
    What makes me qualified? I've watched EVERY fucking episode of American Idol, and every single episode of The Voice...Forget that I won departmental music awards when I was in the 8th grade choir.

  22. #262
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    We have a carry over of what they've accrued for one year up to a max of 150 hours, and they lose it if they don't take it. But since we employ lots of people that have moved here from overseas, they like to take extended trips back home so it's not hard for them to use it up. I am always trying to accrue more so I can take more time off. I never have enough time off.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  23. #263
    Member birdiearch's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Quote Originally Posted by PlayaDelWes View Post
    I guess it's more relevant in non "use it or lose it" states. I have an employee who, on a regular basis, resentfully takes random days off so he doesn't stop accruing.
    I'd do the same!!!!

    On another note, we keep getting bagels, courtesy of one of our roofing consultants. We can't eat them quickly enough.

  24. #264
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    I was returning a voicemail regarding a verification of employment. I accidentally dialed the number incorrectly and ended up calling a hotline for single people to talk to hot single people.

  25. #265

    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    So? Was it hot or not?

  26. #266
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    IMPORTANT QUESTION: do you call powerpoint presentations a "presentation" or a "deck"?
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  27. #267
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    A presentation.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  28. #268
    Coachella Junkie PlayaDelWes's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    Both interchangeably along with report and “those slides”
    Quote Originally Posted by dj12inches View Post
    What makes me qualified? I've watched EVERY fucking episode of American Idol, and every single episode of The Voice...Forget that I won departmental music awards when I was in the 8th grade choir.

  29. #269
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    yeah slides too. i don't know why i hate "deck" so much, but i do. assholes.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  30. #270
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread II - humanitarian edition

    I received the following email from Shayne, the guy I have assisted for the last 5 months:

    Need to put on our radar
    Audrey can you put the info on the calendar please
    My response:

    It’s there now, Shayney.

    Signed,
    AudrA
    No response.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

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