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Thread: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

  1. #1
    Coachella Junkie SoulDischarge's Avatar
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    Default Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    I guess this could be considered the same thing as the confessions thread, but that fucker gets filled with "omg I just ate flavored yogurt and watched CSI allll daaaaay lol" bullshit. Basically, tell us about the things you think and do that make you a terrible person. Please feel free to include things from your past as well. And leave the pussy shit at the door, we don't care that you forgot to push your seat in at work last night.

    For example, when I was a teenager, my friends and I used to go around around Christmas time and knife peoples' blow up decorations just for the hell of it. We also smoked meth out of light bulbs.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Thanks for giving us the opportunity to not give a fuck again.

  2. #2
    Coachella Junkie SoulDischarge's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    And honestly, that's the mildest of the vandalism I was a part of as a teenager. That was just something I thought of today that inspired the thread. We used to throw bricks/rocks through people's car and house windows, always in wealthier neighborhoods than ours, read into that what you will. I videotaped a friend of mine smashing a glass door to a church. One of my friends was a compulsive thief and I went out with him a few times stealing car stereos (although to be fair, that's just the cycle of things in Akron, I had just as many stereos stolen out of my car as I had stolen myself, I wouldn't be surprised if a few didn't find their way back to the original owner). Some of my friends would break into people's houses, I got caught being the getaway driver for one of those instances. When I was a little bit younger, we would block the road by dragging all the trash from the curb into the middle of it. I think one time we tried to give semis flat tires with nail studded wood boards, but it didn't work. I was a truly fucking awful teenager.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Thanks for giving us the opportunity to not give a fuck again.

  3. #3
    Member TheMadeleine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    thanks for sharing
    Quote Originally Posted by JaysonBandivas View Post
    I want to know more about this festival.
    Weekend One & Weekend Two ftw

  4. #4
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    L'enfer, c'est les autres.
    Quote Originally Posted by efrain44 View Post
    Anyone know who the guy in the Cardinals jersey is? I've seen him in pictures on the board and I thought I saw him this year.

  5. #5
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    I was a chronic shoplifter, and I drank beer when I was pregnant with Izzy.

  6. #6
    Coachella Junkie sonofhal's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    How many copies of the Dre album did you steal in total?
    Quote Originally Posted by JustSteve View Post
    well, for all intensive porpoises it is, will sell out within seconds tomorrow.
    Quote Originally Posted by korbinn View Post
    It's jsut dawned on me that I'm overly confident and a extremely ocd perfectionist.
    Quote Originally Posted by kroqken View Post
    I don't give a flying fuck about the Kardashians, I doubt they know who Belle and Sebastian are.

  7. #7
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    I figure at least one.

  8. #8
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Tell Us Why You Think You Were a Badass in High School
    Quote Originally Posted by efrain44 View Post
    Anyone know who the guy in the Cardinals jersey is? I've seen him in pictures on the board and I thought I saw him this year.

  9. #9
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    My badassery came later.

  10. #10
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    mein are all high school exploits as well.

    i slept with a close friend's ex-boyfriend. i also frequently drove while on LSD. once at a rave, my friends and i found a wallet with a debit card that had the atm pin written on it. we stole money from the ATM and used it to buy a vile of ketamine. we got our comeuppance though when we asked someone we'd just met to cook the vile for us and they messed it all up.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  11. #11
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Damn, Patrick. I can't list my things because they are truly awful.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  12. #12
    Member joppy-slow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    I almost killed my dog with chocolate. True story

    When I was 5 my friend and I were playing in my parents basement. My friend told me that he had to go "potty" so I told him to go in the corner (the basement wasn't' finished yet - and I had done it a few times).

    As he started wizzin, I ran up stairs and told my mom what he was doing. She called his dad (ex-marine/cop) who came over and literally carried him to his cop car by his ear-lobe - as he screamed bloody murder. He never found out that i ratted him, but their will be a warm place in hell for me - next to hitler
    2001, 2004, 2007, 2009

    2013 EDM wishlish (please):

    classixx, stanton warriors, logistics, jefr tale
    spencer & hill, bent, eric prydz, mike realm, nick thayer
    kruder & dorfmeister, young punx, phonat, treasure fingers
    Kraak & Smaak, sergio & benoit, kris menace, bassjackers, DJ Craze
    DIGITALISM, knifeparty, chemical brothers, bassbintwins, seth troxler

  13. #13
    Coachella Junkie heart cooks brain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    mein are all high school exploits as well.

    i slept with a close friend's ex-boyfriend. i also frequently drove while on LSD. once at a rave, my friends and i found a wallet with a debit card that had the atm pin written on it. we stole money from the ATM and used it to buy a vile of ketamine. we got our comeuppance though when we asked someone we'd just met to cook the vile for us and they messed it all up.
    replace close with best and boyfriend with girlfriend and yeah. i still feel pretty terrible about it.
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    If moles had subways, molestation wouldn't be one of the creepiest words there is ....
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    Eat don't chat ...When I figure out what windlowless is, I'll respond .
    i hear voices in my head and they keep caaaaallin' me

  14. #14
    Member joppy-slow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Damn, Patrick. I can't list my things because they are truly awful.
    buzzed driving = drunk driving
    2001, 2004, 2007, 2009

    2013 EDM wishlish (please):

    classixx, stanton warriors, logistics, jefr tale
    spencer & hill, bent, eric prydz, mike realm, nick thayer
    kruder & dorfmeister, young punx, phonat, treasure fingers
    Kraak & Smaak, sergio & benoit, kris menace, bassjackers, DJ Craze
    DIGITALISM, knifeparty, chemical brothers, bassbintwins, seth troxler

  15. #15
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by heart cooks brain View Post
    replace close with best and boyfriend with girlfriend and yeah. i still feel pretty terrible about it.
    me too. i still feel pretty terrible about all those things.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  16. #16

    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by joppy-slow View Post
    I almost killed my dog with chocolate. True story

    When I was 5 my friend and I were playing in my parents basement. My friend told me that he had to go "potty" so I told him to go in the corner (the basement wasn't' finished yet - and I had done it a few times).

    As he started wizzin, I ran up stairs and told my mom what he was doing. She called his dad (ex-marine/cop) who came over and literally carried him to his cop car by his ear-lobe - as he screamed bloody murder. He never found out that i ratted him, but their will be a warm place in hell for me - next to hitler


    i just cringed...

  17. #17
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    That's rich
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

  18. #18
    Coachella Junkie Neighborhood Creep's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    I threw a bird in a wood chipper
    Quote Originally Posted by theklein25 View Post
    When Foster the People played Pumped Up Kicks I freaked the fuck out because I thought that song was long gone

  19. #19

    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    That's rich
    fatass

  20. #20
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by Neighborhood Creep View Post
    I threw a bird in a wood chipper
    Was it alive?

  21. #21
    Coachella Junkie heart cooks brain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by Neighborhood Creep View Post
    I threw a bird in a wood chipper
    Sarah Palin?
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    If moles had subways, molestation wouldn't be one of the creepiest words there is ....
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    Eat don't chat ...When I figure out what windlowless is, I'll respond .
    i hear voices in my head and they keep caaaaallin' me

  22. #22
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    we stole money from the ATM and used it to buy a vile of ketamine. we got our comeuppance though when we asked someone we'd just met to cook the vile for us and they messed it all up.
    I was given to understand that ketamine is generally pleasant.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  23. #23
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    I pushed a handicapped person out of a bus line so I could get on first.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  24. #24
    Coachella Junkie Neighborhood Creep's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    Was it alive?
    It was a dove and injured. I used to work in forestry and we always had wood chipped trailing behind our booms. I stuck it in with a small pine and gave it a push. I would have broke its neck but if I did it wrong I didn't want it to be hurt.
    It sounds cooler than it was.

    I was arrested at age 8 for stealing coins from an old lady with friends. That's hell worthy
    Quote Originally Posted by theklein25 View Post
    When Foster the People played Pumped Up Kicks I freaked the fuck out because I thought that song was long gone

  25. #25
    Coachella Junkie PlayaDelWes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    skimming off the top

  26. #26
    Member chbludevil's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    I masturbated once

  27. #27
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    You're going to hell because you only did it . . . once.

  28. #28
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    I refused to let my daughter go to the bathroom during Radiohead at Coachella. Near the end we ran to the bathroom between the main stage and the outdoor though. I feel really bad about that one.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  29. #29
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    That's really fucked up.
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

  30. #30
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tell Us Why You're Going To Hell

    You're going to give your kid a bladder infection.
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

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