Morrissey retirement plans

[Rolwolf]

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/new...-smiths-333294

This is a bummer. He's obviously well past his prime but is still a lot of fun to see live when he's feeling it. Assuming he really does retire in 2 years, is a Smiths reunion more or less likely? One last fat paycheck before calling it a day?

[TomAz]

This does suck. Two more years of his blather? Jesus. Retire now you aging slab of tunafat.

[GuyInTucson]

In my world, Morrissey retired 25 years ago.

[rasooli]

The Smiths wouldn't be a Coachella headliner if they came back together.

[IceyHotshot]

The Smiths wouldn't be a Coachella headliner if they came back together.

What? Why not?

[concertgoer]

The Smiths wouldn't be a Coachella headliner if they came back together.

Seriously?

[GuyInTucson]

The Smiths wouldn't be a Coachella headliner if they came back together.

Incorrect.

[concertgoer]

Oh come on guys everyone knows that Goldenvoice likes to offer their subheadliners 10 million dollars to play........

[captncrzy]

The Smiths wouldn't be a Coachella headliner if they came back together.

If anyone needed proof that your brain is completely made of fried eggs, well...here it is.

[CrimesceneCookie]

The Smiths wouldn't be a Coachella headliner if they came back together.

LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS FOR THE NEXT 7 PAGES!

[travelfan]

Oh come on guys everyone knows that Goldenvoice likes to offer their subheadliners 10 million dollars to play........

Swedish House Mafia = most expensive subheadliner ever?

[grichsgang]

Don't let the door hitya where God splitya

[algunz]

"We will all probably be blown up by the Syrian government soon, anyway, so it hardly matters in the great scheme of things."

[betao]

What exactly is Morrissey retiring from? Being sick?

[Coachella Bound]

from being a vegetarian.... he needs the meat.

[SepaGroove]

Thank god. Morrissey sucks.

[stinkbutt]

Have any of you guys ever tried to talk about The Smiths to anyone? Rasooli is right, no one gives a fuck about them

[stinkbutt]

Oh you mean that band that had that somewhat of a hit in the 80s? Yeah, they are gonna headline the biggest music festival in the world right now.

Doesn't sound right does it?

[Grandma]

WHALE COCK
The Skateboard Is Dead

Welcomes Its New Am Morrissey

It was upon leaving The Cat and the Fiddle, a Hollywood English-style pub, with two friends, Aaron and Allan, that I made eye contact with the shy Manchester poet sitting quietly in the dark corner of the beer garden with two companions. "Holy shit!" I said once we were on the curb, "That was Morrissey!" In utter disbelief, Aaron returned to the beer garden and nearly walked right up to Morrissey before returning and saying, "You're right. Nice call."

I went and got my camera and asked Aaron to take a picture of me with my idol. Allan said, "you should pull your dick out for the photo." I heartily agreed, but as I approached Morrissey's table, all feelings of adversity left me, and I felt as if I were a little girl. Without saying his name, I extended my hand and squeaked, "I'm a big fan of yours." I noticed that one of his companions was a young Asian girl, his other guest I'm at a complete loss to which sex it belonged. He took my hand and shook it limply. His hands were soft. "Would you mind if I took a picture with you?" I asked, but before I had even finished the question, he was already rising. There was a weariness in his eyes and movements, like he had answered this request a million times before. Later, Allan would say, I used to think Morrissey was a prick, but that changed my opinion of him. He stood up to have his picture taken with you. That was really cool."

Aside from the ravages of time, of which I thought this gentle man would forever remain immune, and the gray in his hair and sideburns, he looked exactly how he was in the countless pictures I've seen of him. He was smartly dressed in a pair of jeans, with a green wool sweater pulled over a white collar shirt.

As I put my arm around him and drew him to me, I asked, "So, what are you doing in L.A.?" What else could I say? "Just having a drink." He said in his cute little Manchester accent.

After the picture was taken, I thanked him and despite my yearning to sing Smiths' lyrics to prove I was indeed a fan, I waved goodbye. But before I left, a peculiar thing happened. I turned and said, "I love you." I love you? What the fuck? I never say shit like that. True, I do love Morrissey, but you don't say that to someone. I mean dudes don't say that to dudes.

I've thought deeply on the incident, and I've decided that Morrissey has magic powers over men. He can make men fall in love with him. I know it sounds strange, but how else could you explain the countless number of men who have rushed the stages of his shows and kissed the little man, given him flowers and no doubt professed their love to him? I've decided this is not a bad thing, and I have given myself over to my love of Morrissey and his magic powers; in so doing, I have made him the first am on the Whale Cock team. You will be mesmerized by his magic powers and fall in love with Whale Cock skateboards.

Morrissey fans are pillocks

[Coachella Bound]

Have any of you guys ever tried to talk about The Smiths to anyone? Rasooli is right, no one gives a fuck about them

I tried to talk to myself about the Smiths just the other week, found myself putting on the record and realizing.... wow, this is some depressing and cynical crap. Will always love "What Difference Does It Make" and a few others, but otherwise i dont think id make it through an entire set.

[xuclarockerx]

is that dave grohl

[amyzzz]

This whole thread is a pile of

[gaypalmsprings]

[fatbastard]

Morrissey just needs more bran in his life.

[betao]

is that dave grohl

i thought it was dave navarro

[SoulDischarge]

Have any of you guys ever tried to talk about The Smiths to anyone? Rasooli is right, no one gives a fuck about them

I know so many people who have pretty much no interest in indie rock or 80s shit or anything else that Smiths fans are typically into that fucking love the Smiths. Queers especially. Every queer metalhead/hardcore bro I've ever known is a total Smiths fanatic.

[santasutt]

The Smiths wouldn't be a Coachella headliner if they came back together.

The longer they wait to reunite, the truer this becomes.

[breathewithme]

blistering version of "How Soon is Now" to wrap up his Coachella performance. Yes, he was whiny, and whatnot, but go back and listen to Suedehead...guy's a genius and an icon. I for one would love to see the Smiths perform, but it will never happen. Luckily I've seen him in Berkeley, SF and SJ...and had him cancel on me once or twice, but he's fucking Morrissey...he will always be cool.

[grichsgang]

Johnny Marr was the star of that band, in my opinion. Morrissey's singing style can grate, to say the least.

[rasooli]

If anyone needed proof that your brain is completely made of fried eggs, well...here it is.

I'm willing to bet 80% of the people who went to Coachella 2012 never heard of The Smiths.