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Thread: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

  1. #1

    Default Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Because you know it will happen. Share your coping mechanisms, ideas how to choose between sets, curse GV, etc.....

  2. #2

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    premature

  3. #3

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    fatalist snake

  4. #4

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Jay-Z & Deadmau5.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Chemical Brothers & Boys Noize.

  6. #6
    Lurker DerekClapton's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    waiting for these set times is conflicting with this essay I should be writing right now

  7. #7
    Old Gay Guy gaypalmsprings's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    this thread is gay

  8. #8
    Member Tandemind's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    When will the set times be released? Before or after 3pm PST?

  9. #9

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by DerekClapton View Post
    waiting for these set times is conflicting with this essay I should be writing right now
    sucks to ur edgemication...

  10. #10
    old school juloxx's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Game of Thrones and Loiter Squad
    G-funk acquired, thank you Coachella

    Quote Originally Posted by Theijuiel View Post
    Don't watch Conspiracy Theory while on mushrooms.
    You know a festival is in the process of dying when you start to see sports jerseys there....

  11. #11

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by Tandemind View Post
    When will the set times be released? Before or after 3pm PST?
    Neither. Exactly at 3PM PST is when I'll be releasing them.

  12. #12

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by juloxx View Post
    Game of Thrones and Loiter Squad
    I chooses Game of Thrones.

  13. #13
    Member blueduck's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by gaypalmsprings View Post
    this thread is gay
    i agree
    Friday: Outkast | Girl Talk | HAIM | Bonobo | Flume | Wye Oak | The Preatures
    Saturday: Lorde | Sleigh Bells | CHVRCHES | Capital Cities | Warpaint | Washed Out | Banks
    Sunday: Arcade Fire | Beck | Disclosure | Lana Del Rey | AlunaGeorge | Superchunk | Daughter | Poolside

  14. #14
    Happy Feet Coachella Bound's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Would you rather be stuck in an elevator w/ Whoopi Goldberg or Bette Midler....???
    Coachella 07 (the introduction), 08 (the bands), 09 (the documentary), 10 (the people i came with), 11 (the relationship test... we passed), 12 (whatever the weather, Dirty Epic forever), 13 (the year of the troll)

    - PEARL JAM WHY YOU HATE COACHELLA? -

  15. #15
    Member Tandemind's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Will the set times be posted under Lineup or Festival Info on the mainpage?

  16. #16

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by Coachella Bound View Post
    Would you rather be stuck in an elevator w/ Whoopi Goldberg or Bette Midler....???
    whoopi. mostly for her involvement in Star Trek.


  17. #17

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by Tandemind View Post
    Will the set times be posted under Lineup or Festival Info on the mainpage?
    Neither. Will be posted on Applebees main website, under menu.

  18. #18
    Member CitizenJ's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by Taylor View Post
    whoopi. mostly for her involvement in Star Trek.

    Let us not forget Eddie...


  19. #19

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    palestinian-israeli

  20. #20
    Member nerdtram's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    im going both weekends and im still expecting to cry over conflicts.

  21. #21
    Happy Feet Coachella Bound's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by CitizenJ View Post
    Let us not forget Eddie...

    Coachella 07 (the introduction), 08 (the bands), 09 (the documentary), 10 (the people i came with), 11 (the relationship test... we passed), 12 (whatever the weather, Dirty Epic forever), 13 (the year of the troll)

    - PEARL JAM WHY YOU HATE COACHELLA? -

  22. #22
    Member rambleonfreddy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by Coachella Bound View Post
    Would you rather be stuck in an elevator w/ Whoopi Goldberg or Bette Midler....???
    hmmm, i feel like Whoopi would have some good stories.
    "Tell me more about the Schwayze, please"

  23. #23

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Friday 2:30 PM: Givers
    Fridy 2:30 PM: Breakbot

  24. #24

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Set times will either come out tonight or tomorrow might (7-10pm pacific time).

  25. #25

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    It's really indeterminable seeing as how early in the day the lineup came out this year.

  26. #26

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by gaypalmsprings View Post
    this thread is gay
    You're damn right it's gay.

  27. #27

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    Quote Originally Posted by bdb23 View Post
    premature
    I prefer fatalist snake

  28. #28

    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    I predict set times will come out tomorrow night

  29. #29
    Coachella Junkie heart cooks brain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    i would love them to be out by tomorrow morning so i have something to stare at on the plane :/
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    If moles had subways, molestation wouldn't be one of the creepiest words there is ....
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    Eat don't chat ...When I figure out what windlowless is, I'll respond .
    i hear voices in my head and they keep caaaaallin' me

  30. #30
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Cry About Your Conflicts Here

    In many cases, conflict in the workplace just seems to be a fact of life. We've all seen situations where different people with different goals and needs have come into conflict. And we've all seen the often-intense personal animosity that can result.

    The fact that conflict exists, however, is not necessarily a bad thing: As long as it is resolved effectively, it can lead to personal and professional growth.

    In many cases, effective conflict resolution can make the difference between positive and negative outcomes.

    The good news is that by resolving conflict successfully, you can solve many of the problems that it has brought to the surface, as well as getting benefits that you might not at first expect:

    •Increased understanding: The discussion needed to resolve conflict expands people's awareness of the situation, giving them an insight into how they can achieve their own goals without undermining those of other people.
    •Increased group cohesion: When conflict is resolved effectively, team members can develop stronger mutual respect, and a renewed faith in their ability to work together.
    •Improved self-knowledge: Conflict pushes individuals to examine their goals in close detail , helping them understand the things that are most important to them, sharpening their focus, and enhancing their effectiveness.
    However, if conflict is not handled effectively, the results can be damaging. Conflicting goals can quickly turn into personal dislike. Teamwork breaks down. Talent is wasted as people disengage from their work. And it's easy to end up in a vicious downward spiral of negativity and recrimination.

    If you're to keep your team or organization working effectively, you need to stop this downward spiral as soon as you can. To do this, it helps to understand two of the theories that lie behind effective conflict resolution:

    Understanding the Theory: Conflict Styles
    In the 1970s Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kilmann identified five main styles of dealing with conflict that vary in their degrees of cooperativeness and assertiveness. They argued that people typically have a preferred conflict resolution style. However they also noted that different styles were most useful in different situations. They developed the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI) which helps you to identify which style you tend towards when conflict arises.

    Thomas and Kilmann's styles are:

    Competitive: People who tend towards a competitive style take a firm stand, and know what they want. They usually operate from a position of power, drawn from things like position, rank, expertise, or persuasive ability. This style can be useful when there is an emergency and a decision needs to be make fast; when the decision is unpopular; or when defending against someone who is trying to exploit the situation selfishly. However it can leave people feeling bruised, unsatisfied and resentful when used in less urgent situations.

    Collaborative: People tending towards a collaborative style try to meet the needs of all people involved. These people can be highly assertive but unlike the competitor, they cooperate effectively and acknowledge that everyone is important. This style is useful when a you need to bring together a variety of viewpoints to get the best solution; when there have been previous conflicts in the group; or when the situation is too important for a simple trade-off.

    Compromising: People who prefer a compromising style try to find a solution that will at least partially satisfy everyone. Everyone is expected to give up something, and the compromiser him- or herself also expects to relinquish something. Compromise is useful when the cost of conflict is higher than the cost of losing ground, when equal strength opponents are at a standstill and when there is a deadline looming.

    Accommodating: This style indicates a willingness to meet the needs of others at the expense of the person's own needs. The accommodator often knows when to give in to others, but can be persuaded to surrender a position even when it is not warranted. This person is not assertive but is highly cooperative. Accommodation is appropriate when the issues matter more to the other party, when peace is more valuable than winning, or when you want to be in a position to collect on this "favor" you gave. However people may not return favors, and overall this approach is unlikely to give the best outcomes.

    Avoiding: People tending towards this style seek to evade the conflict entirely. This style is typified by delegating controversial decisions, accepting default decisions, and not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings. It can be appropriate when victory is impossible, when the controversy is trivial, or when someone else is in a better position to solve the problem. However in many situations this is a weak and ineffective approach to take.

    Once you understand the different styles, you can use them to think about the most appropriate approach (or mixture of approaches) for the situation you're in. You can also think about your own instinctive approach, and learn how you need to change this if necessary.

    Ideally you can adopt an approach that meets the situation, resolves the problem, respects people's legitimate interests, and mends damaged working relationships.
    Understanding The Theory: The "Interest-Based Relational Approach"
    The second theory is commonly referred to as the "Interest-Based Relational (IBR) Approach". This type of conflict resolution respects individual differences while helping people avoid becoming too entrenched in a fixed position.

    In resolving conflict using this approach, you follow these rules:

    •Make sure that good relationships are the first priority: As far as possible, make sure that you treat the other calmly and that you try to build mutual respect. Do your best to be courteous to one-another and remain constructive under pressure.
    •Keep people and problems separate: Recognize that in many cases the other person is not just "being difficult" – real and valid differences can lie behind conflictive positions. By separating the problem from the person, real issues can be debated without damaging working relationships.
    •Pay attention to the interests that are being presented: By listening carefully you'll most-likely understand why the person is adopting his or her position.
    •Listen first; talk second: To solve a problem effectively you have to understand where the other person is coming from before defending your own position.
    •Set out the "Facts": Agree and establish the objective, observable elements that will have an impact on the decision.
    •Explore options together: Be open to the idea that a third position may exist, and that you can get to this idea jointly.
    By following these rules, you can often keep contentious discussions positive and constructive. This helps to prevent the antagonism and dislike which so-often causes conflict to spin out of control.

    Using the Tool: A Conflict Resolution Process
    Based on these approaches, a starting point for dealing with conflict is to identify the overriding conflict style employed by yourself, your team or your organization.

    Over time, people's conflict management styles tend to mesh, and a "right" way to solve conflict emerges. It's good to recognize when this style can be used effectively, however make sure that people understand that different styles may suit different situations.

    Look at the circumstances, and think about the style that may be appropriate.

    Then use the process below to resolve the conflict:

    Step One: Set the Scene
    If appropriate to the situation, agree the rules of the IBR Approach (or at least consider using the approach yourself.) Make sure that people understand that the conflict may be a mutual problem, which may be best resolved through discussion and negotiation rather than through raw aggression.

    If you are involved in the conflict, emphasize the fact that you are presenting your perception of the problem. Use active listening skills to ensure you hear and understand other's positions and perceptions.

    •Restate.
    •Paraphrase.
    •Summarize.
    And make sure that when you talk, you're using an adult, assertive approach rather than a submissive or aggressive style.

    Step Two: Gather Information
    Here you are trying to get to the underlying interests, needs, and concerns. Ask for the other person's viewpoint and confirm that you respect his or her opinion and need his or her cooperation to solve the problem.

    Try to understand his or her motivations and goals, and see how your actions may be affecting these.

    Also, try to understand the conflict in objective terms: Is it affecting work performance? damaging the delivery to the client? disrupting team work? hampering decision-making? or so on. Be sure to focus on work issues and leave personalities out of the discussion.

    •Listen with empathy and see the conflict from the other person's point of view.
    •Identify issues clearly and concisely.
    •Use "I" statements.
    •Remain flexible.
    •Clarify feelings.
    Step Three: Agree the Problem
    This sounds like an obvious step, but often different underlying needs, interests and goals can cause people to perceive problems very differently. You'll need to agree the problems that you are trying to solve before you'll find a mutually acceptable solution.

    Sometimes different people will see different but interlocking problems – if you can't reach a common perception of the problem, then at the very least, you need to understand what the other person sees as the problem.

    Step Four: Brainstorm Possible Solutions
    If everyone is going to feel satisfied with the resolution, it will help if everyone has had fair input in generating solutions. Brainstorm possible solutions, and be open to all ideas, including ones you never considered before.

    Step Five: Negotiate a Solution
    By this stage, the conflict may be resolved: Both sides may better understand the position of the other, and a mutually satisfactory solution may be clear to all.

    However you may also have uncovered real differences between your positions. This is where a technique like win-win negotiation can be useful to find a solution that, at least to some extent, satisfies everyone.

    There are three guiding principles here: Be Calm, Be Patient, Have Respect.



    Key Points
    Conflict in the workplace can be incredibly destructive to good teamwork.

    Managed in the wrong way, real and legitimate differences between people can quickly spiral out of control, resulting in situations where co-operation breaks down and the team's mission is threatened. This is particularly the case where the wrong approaches to conflict resolution are used.

    To calm these situations down, it helps to take a positive approach to conflict resolution, where discussion is courteous and non-confrontational, and the focus is on issues rather than on individuals. If this is done, then, as long as people listen carefully and explore facts, issues and possible solutions properly, conflict can often be resolved effectively.
    To explore the process of conflict resolution in more depth, take our Bite-Sized Training session on Dealing with Conflict.
    Quote Originally Posted by efrain44 View Post
    Anyone know who the guy in the Cardinals jersey is? I've seen him in pictures on the board and I thought I saw him this year.

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