Tips for Bringing a Toddler (No Snark Zone)

[blueduck]

She won't be allowed in the beer tent and we'll be with her at all times (when she's not with the babysitter, who will be doing that back at camp)

OK, so you win the Golden Star for the shittest parent award. 1. I hope you wouldn;t bring your 2 year old in the beer garden, all those drunk kids in there 20's spilling beer all over baby. 2. Your babysitter is going to be staying in the camp gorunds? that shows great parenting skills. 3. Sounds like your 18, had an opps baby, cant find a stay AT HOME babysitter. Sell your tickets, stay home, and stop being a selfish cunt

[JustSteve]

Are you even old enough to step foot in the beer garden blue? Doesn't appear so based on your grasp of basic spelling, grammar, and punctuation.

[blueduck]

Are you even old enough to step foot in the beer garden blue? Doesn't appear so based on your grasp of basic spelling, grammar, and punctuation.

I'm 29 with two kids myself. My kids have better grammer than i do.

[guedita]

My extensive experience in beer gardens is empirical proof that drunk people love spilling beers all over infants.

"Is that a baby?"

"Holy shit, that's a fucking baby."

(stumble over to said baby).

"HEY BABY!"

"ENJOY THIS BEER!" (pours beer all over baby).

"Haha, babies."

[weezy f baby]

My extensive experience in beer gardens is empirical proof that drunk people love spilling beers all over infants.

"Is that a baby?"

"Holy shit, that's a fucking baby."

(stumble over to said baby).

"HEY BABY!"

"ENJOY THIS BEER!" (pours beer all over baby).

"Haha, babies."

That's the rule at coachella. See a baby. Pour beer over said baby.

Besides the beer baby rule, why the fuck would you ever take your kid to Coachella? You do realize it's the fuckin desert right? Don't be fooled by the palm trees and grass. It gets hot and it's super dry. Not to mention the fact that someone could snatch your kid away when you're not looking, or your kid could get trampled or lost or any number of things. The benefits definitely do NOT outweigh the negatives because child safety should always be your #1, #2, #3, #4, and #5 concerns.

Darwin Parenting Award Winner 2012!

[guedita]

I'm ready to hear some of you explain in further detail the very serious and probable chance that there are baby snatchers lurking the Coachella grounds just ready to steal someone's toddler. Also the probability of toddler trampling.

[weezy f baby]

I'm ready to hear some of you explain in further detail the very serious and probable chance that there are baby snatchers lurking the Coachella grounds just ready to steal someone's toddler. Also the probability of toddler trampling.

Depends on the situation. If you take your kid deep into the Sahara Tent, the chance of trampling increases.

[thebaxter]

That's the rule at coachella. See a baby. Pour beer over said baby.

Besides the beer baby rule, why the fuck would you ever take your kid to Coachella? You do realize it's the fuckin desert right? Don't be fooled by the palm trees and grass. It gets hot and it's super dry. Not to mention the fact that someone could snatch your kid away when you're not looking, or your kid could get trampled or lost or any number of things.

Based on the reactions from people on this board, I don't think she's in any danger of being snatched up. It sounds like many of you are horrified by children. I do realize it's the fucking desert. I also realize that there are many people who live in the desert, including children. We've been to hot climates before. Her safety IS my #1 concern, but I'm not going to keep us all holed up in our house until she's 18 just because something *might* happen to her. There are plenty of places I won't be taking her, but those places usually don't allow children anyway. I assume that the reason there are still children allowed at Coachella is because it's been fine in the past.

And Blue, REALLY? Taking a kid to a concert, even with utmost preparedness (the whole reason I even posted here in the first place), makes me "the shittest parent"? Yep. I can't think of a single thing more damaging to a child than that.

[thebaxter]

Depends on the situation. If you take your kid deep into the Sahara Tent, the chance of trampling increases.

As I said, I don't plan to take her "deep into" anywhere. We're sticking to the outskirts and we're definitely going to look for quiet, shady spots whenever possible. Especially spots where other families are. Don't worry. I don't want to crash your crazy drug party with my toddler. I just want to hear some music with my family.

[thebaxter]

I'm 29 with two kids myself. My kids have better grammer than i do.

Would your kids make unfounded assumptions about a stranger and call them a cunt in a public forum? That's not the kind of example I want to set for mine.

[weezy f baby]

So it looks like you're hell bent on bringing your toddler. Here are my sugggestions:

Bring a bunch of beach towels you can lay out for nap time or come after the kid wakes up from their nap (cuz blankets aren't allowed). Bring an extra set of clothes for you and your kid. Bring a sweater for the kid. It gets cold at night. Bring extra cash for water and food. Bring toys for your kid to play with. Bring sunscreen. Be prepared to leave early.

Be safe and don't forget to have a great time.

[weezy f baby]

As I said, I don't plan to take her "deep into" anywhere. We're sticking to the outskirts and we're definitely going to look for quiet, shady spots whenever possible. Especially spots where other families are. Don't worry. I don't want to crash your crazy drug party with my toddler. I just want to hear some music with my family.

Damn! Trampling toddlers is a favorite past time of attendees of crazy drug parties.

[Goatchella]

Break the thiz into smaller pieces and get those mini glow sticks.


untz away kiddo

[blueduck]

I don't want to crash your crazy drug party with my toddler. I just want to hear some music with my family.

Then goto chuckycheese.

[Goatchella]

Blue duck is sXe

[blueduck]

Would your kids make unfounded assumptions about a stranger and call them a cunt in a public forum? That's not the kind of example I want to set for mine.

I wouldn't bring my kids around a place that has people on drugs. I normally don't go on public forums talking shit on anyone but you truly sound like a selfish cunt that is thinking of yourself before your child.

[blueduck]

Blue duck is sXe

I don't always drink beer but when I do I like to pour it on infants.

[Goatchella]

Don't worry man....the baby sitter will be back from snorting lines at the campsite and we can get closer to the stage.

[guedita]

Jesus Christ. Do you think a 2 year old knows what people on drugs look like? How dumb are some of you people?

I'd argue that even mature 2 year olds are pretty inexperienced when it comes to knowing what people on drugs might look like.

[thebaxter]

I wouldn't bring my kids around a place that has people on drugs. I normally don't go on public forums talking shit on anyone but you truly sound like a selfish cunt that is thinking of yourself before your child.

Fortunately, it looks like we will be seeing different bands. I'm MUCH more concerned about her meeting rude, judgmental people like you than people who are having a good time on drugs.

[blueduck]

Jesus Christ. Do you think a 2 year old knows what people on drugs look like? How dumb are some of you people?

I'd argue that even mature 2 year olds are pretty inexperienced when it comes to knowing what people on drugs might look like.

So your telling me you have never been to drunk or to high to care about your Surroundings running into people. I can see it now someone super trashed running threw the fields running into this lady with her mature 2 year old knocking it out of her hands head first on to the floor. Good Game

[Goatchella]

Dead baby on a stick

[guedita]

So your telling me you have never been to drunk or to high to care about your Surroundings running into people. I can see it know someone super trashed running threw the fields running into this lady with her mature 2 year old knocking it out of her hands head first on to the floor. Good Game

Have you ever been to Coachella? You come off as incredibly stupid.

[blueduck]

Have you ever been to Coachella? You come off as incredibly stupid.

[guedita]

Huh. It's almost as if the many coherent people around him aren't able to see him coming, and move away. So strange! I guess a single video of someone vamping up an acid trip is definitive proof that baxter's toddler is going to be gravely injured.

[blueduck]

It could happen that's why she should keep the ruggrat at home.

[guedita]

Baxter, do you ever take your toddler to the park? I saw a video once of a drunk homeless guy running around a park, eventually throwing up on a bench. I'm just saying, it's highly likely that a drunk homeless man will do the same thing, but the bench will be your baby.

[waterandcoffee]

She is a very mature 2.

193163_169882979730559_100001265731011_410240_5254497_o-1-1.jpg

[blueduck]

Baxter, do you ever take your toddler to the park? I saw a video once of a drunk homeless guy running around a park, eventually throwing up on a bench. I'm just saying, it's highly likely that a drunk homeless man will do the same thing, but the bench will be your baby.

A park 100 people max vs Coachella 50k plus. That's fine bring your kid to Coachella but I'll be on the look out for a mature 2 year old to spill my beer on.

[guedita]

I was at a park that held 200 people once.