DM is sooooo not S & M.
Supre must go to the lamest gay bars. They're all hanging out in leather pants and band shirts, listening to Depeche Mode, awkwardly going around and being snotty about each others' whips but all too afraid to take their dicks out.
And taking pictures . . .
2 oz blended whiskey
Juice of 1/2 lemon
1/2 tsp powdered sugar
1/2 slice lemon
Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.
I'm picturing Xanman and Supre finding each other at the S & P (Sado-Photography) bar they frequent, showing each other their favorite shots on their viewfinders, and then finally after doing the dance for a long while they abscond off to a back room to get down to business. They each pull out unimpressive and weird-colored penises. They try their best to jerk each other off, but both are so frighteningly autistic and incapable of reading other people's emotions or body language that they have no fucking clue how to pleasure another person. Neither even achieves a semi-erection. They leave in an uncomfortable silence.
This still gets recorded in both their diaries as the most exciting night of their entire lives.
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Dating is a pain in the ass. Why am I supposed to care about this again?
I'm crying over the nightmares I'm going to have of Xan & Supre in leather & chains.
It doesn't. You should just get over the bullshit already and get a whore. They're nice people, they're familiar with your situation, and they'll get you past the uncomfortable phase of things so that you won't be so damn nervous and full of weird neurotic bullshit.
Either way it seems like it requires a lot of work.
Yes, work will be part of the scenario. It always should be.
You shouldn't need to pay a professional.
I'm not getting a whore.
I don't know if I should call the girl I went on the date with back, part of me feels like I should give her another chance, the other part can't be assed. I mean if we didn't click the first time why would seeing her again help?
What's the gain in not calling her?
People PAID for you!!?
Those must have been good days.
Wasn't a bad way to make money. I was picking up independent work as a Reiki massage therapist. Turned out in this city, you'll get at least a couple of clients who are really just bored housewives. When you're already a cute young guy and you're really fucking good with your hands, most of these clients will want the same thing men want when they get massages.
It'll happen naturally at some point and be awkward as hell and I won't have to pay for it. Big deal.
All the stuff from earlier in the year where I was talking about how I don't want to have sex with someone unless I love her was bullshit emotional baggage from my last relationship. I've since realized how bogus it was.
Look, my biggest problem is that it takes me a while to warm up to people. It takes me about 6 months to get to feel like I can act naturally around them. With women it's probably more. It's not because sex is on my mind or isn't, it's because I feel like I'm constantly being judged.
I'm getting better though. I'm learning to stop caring as much and actually have fun with it. Flirt. Tease. Be a dick. I feel like I'm actually finally living through my early 20s right now where I'm starting to figure shit out.