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Thread: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

  1. #11551
    Banned marooko's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Well shit, your a good looking dude.

  2. #11552

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    i'm a dude, i just like long hair
    and great tits apparently.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mammoth85 View Post
    I hope Wario and Donkey Kong don't conflict.

  3. #11553
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    BITCH TITS
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  4. #11554
    Member ENluv12's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Now THAT'S hot.
    Quote Originally Posted by involvelemons View Post
    Silent discos are like having sex with a virgin: really exciting in theory, extremely awkward in execution.
    Quote Originally Posted by BROKENDOLL View Post
    I bet Cara's gotten enough Twats on a Platter and Dick on a Stick to open her own Trolls to Go snack shop.

  5. #11555
    old school NachoCat's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Im not sure why but the phrase "bitch tits" turns me on.

  6. #11556
    Member fiopadp7791's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    So... there's a way I can prove I haven't been the greasy dbag at the bar/club- I'm too much of a wuss at those establishments to be that way. So, with that beng said: I frequent a place where it seems almost every time I go there, there's this unbelievably lovely lady that I see there as well. Stinkbutt knows of this place. So. After a year+ of seeing this girl there, I finally muster up the balls to say "hi" tonight. We make small talk, exchange names (because we all know "Gretchen" is a great name for a woman of Asian descent), and I try to get to know her a little. She's seeing someone. Maybe she really is. Maybe she always was. But maybe if i hit on her months ago she wasn't. But maybe I crashed and burned and she either never had any interest or I just had nothing good to say and decided she had no interest. Kinda bummed. Time for a dating site. If y'all wanna ridicule me for that one time... I deserve it...
    If y'all fresh to death, then I'm deceased... -Kanye West
    Jamiroquai 2015 please.
    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    How is any of that ironic? On this board I absolutely expect terrible people to call other people terrible.

  7. #11557
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    ... so she's seeming somebody. So what?
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  8. #11558
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Dude, if I passed by every chick who was "seeing someone" my numbers would be way lower. Hang around, you'll be the attractive alternative when the guy she's seeing turns out to be a dickbag.
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  9. #11559
    Member fiopadp7791's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I just assumed "seeing someone" either means she really is (although I don't think I've ever seen him), or it's the polite way of saying "get the fuck away from me, psycho"
    If y'all fresh to death, then I'm deceased... -Kanye West
    Jamiroquai 2015 please.
    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    How is any of that ironic? On this board I absolutely expect terrible people to call other people terrible.

  10. #11560
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    It could be the latter, and if it is you'll find out more clearly soon enough. In the meantime, be charming and flirt.
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  11. #11561
    Member MostlyMellow's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Yeah be a douche and live a day as rts

  12. #11562
    Member MostlyMellow's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Fuck a 6 like Guadita that personality adds at least 3 for me

  13. #11563
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Yay! Yet another incoherent dipshit is posting! Woo!
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  14. #11564
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by MostlyMellow View Post
    Fuck a 6 like Guadita that personality adds at least 3 for me
    You spelled my name wrong, asshole.

    8/30: Peaking Lights @ The Chapel
    9/3: Bear in Heaven @ The Independent
    9/11: Tomas Barfod @ The Rickshaw Stop
    9/12: Shifted @ Mercer
    9/24 - 28: Decibel Festival
    10/3-5: Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival
    10/4: Ought @ BoH
    10/5: The War on Drugs, Cass McCombs @ The Fillmore
    10/18-19: Treasure Island Music Festival

  15. #11565
    Can't Post anymore. bummer Zafocaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    You spelled my name wrong, asshole.
    Do a google image search of "guedita." Based on the results for "Zafocaine," I'm sure you'll find it depressing.

  16. #11566
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I think sexually speaking, I would rate my experiences with Guedi to be about a four. Would have been an eight, but she stole all my Norcos while she was going down on me and then "conveniently" fell asleep right before the anal was going to commence.
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  17. #11567
    Can't Post anymore. bummer Zafocaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by RotationSlimWang View Post
    I think sexually speaking, I would rate my experiences with Guedi to be about a four. Would have been an eight, but she stole all my Norcos while she was going down on me and then "conveniently" fell asleep right before the anal was going to commence.
    Do a google image search of "RotationalSlimWang." Based on the results for "Zafocaine," I'm sure you'll kill yourself.

  18. #11568
    Member fiopadp7791's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by RotationSlimWang View Post
    It could be the latter, and if it is you'll find out more clearly soon enough. In the meantime, be charming and flirt.
    We both frequent the place, so I'll definitely see her again more sooner than later. At least the super awkward breaking of the ice was done last night, so if I see her I can at least say "hey" (I'll try not to sound too much like the Fonz when I say it) if we pass by each other.

    Well maybe the ice wasn't broken but I at least introduced myself... for better or worse
    If y'all fresh to death, then I'm deceased... -Kanye West
    Jamiroquai 2015 please.
    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    How is any of that ironic? On this board I absolutely expect terrible people to call other people terrible.

  19. #11569

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    For better or for worse? What's so fucking bad about introducing yourself? The world's not going to end.

  20. #11570
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    ... YOU of all fucking people say that, Icey? What's so fucking bad about just having sex already? The world's not going to end.
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  21. #11571

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I agree with you. Which is why I packed condoms and a change of clothes for tonight's date. And even shaved my balls.

  22. #11572
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Go get 'em, iceyhotstuff!

  23. #11573
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    ...How does one nonchalantly bring a change of clothes on a date?

  24. #11574

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I thought I would leave that in my car trunk. MIND BLOWING I KNOW.

  25. #11575
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Leave it in the car?


    Jinx. You owe me a Coke in April, Icey.

  26. #11576
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Oh, I forgot people have cars. Hahahaaa.

  27. #11577
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Did you bring a change of clothes for the date or because you're expecting to be staying out all night?
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  28. #11578
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Let's see both outfits before we let you go fuck this all up.
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  29. #11579

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by RotationSlimWang View Post
    Did you bring a change of clothes for the date or because you're expecting to be staying out all night?
    The latter. I have work in the morning.

    I don't really expect it but want to be prepared.

    And I thought only guedita got outfit post requests?

  30. #11580
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Fuck it ALL up is exactly what we want him to do, Randy.

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