It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

[miscorrections]

cr******

[Somewhat Damaged]

I like how none of you morons apparently noticed that the author is Mindy Kaling and that it is thus obviously satirical.

[thewoodenman]

Yea I am not seeing how I'm anything like that dude, isn't he an old deadhead type fellow? I don't even like hippy stuff

[miscorrections]

Your writing style, or lack thereof, is well on its way to Ron-like incoherence.

[buddy]

I like how none of you morons apparently noticed that the author is Mindy Kaling and that it is thus obviously satirical.

they're probably the same people who didn't read thefunkylama was part of the crew setting up the slacklines.

[ramblinon]

Between OKC and Facebook misses... y'all are making the 25 year old virgin sound entertaining in comparison. But on the upside, you're making me feel a shit-ton better that I haven't had sex in 3 weeks. So keep on being amazingly boring and neurotic, I guess?

[Newro7ic]

Talked to her and she says she is too shy to meet up just yet? We met on pof and been talking for a few weeks, she offered me her Facebook shortly after pof because she was deleting her profile, then after a week or so offered her phone number and we've been talking regularly since. Hmm being led on? Give it time? I can understand Kinda because she has said from the beginning she was weary of the whole online thing and is shy...hm

She could be stringing you along, but it doesn't seem that way. Why would she go to all that trouble? I think you just need to decide if she seems cool enough to wait until she's ready, or cut and run. Lots of people *coughkatcough* think its weird to meet people off the Internet, and need time to warm up to the idea. Then there are the logical folks who realize that we're all just people, and you're just as likely to meet a psycho out on the street as you are on the Internet.

Good luck.

[thewoodenman]

Between OKC and Facebook misses... y'all are making the 25 year old virgin sound entertaining in comparison. But on the upside, you're making me feel a shit-ton better that I haven't had sex in 3 weeks. So keep on being amazingly boring and neurotic, I guess?

Hate to break it to you but I've got you beat there. You need to get on that, brah.

[Drinkey McDrinkerstein]

I like how none of you morons apparently noticed that the author is Mindy Kaling and that it is thus obviously satirical.

Is she a household name? I googled her now and recognize her from The Office, but you mentioning it is literally the first time I'd ever seen her name.

[ramblinon]

Hate to break it to you but I've got you beat there. You need to get on that, brah.

Good for you. Now write something worth reading.

[thewoodenman]

Your writing style, or lack thereof, is well on its way to Ron-like incoherence.

Oh...you can just suck it. I'm usually using my phone and am too impatient for this "coherence" you speak so highly of.

[thewoodenman]

Good for you. Now write something worth reading.

Welp, in relation to a story I posted here a while back I have since heard back from the ex...and her new fellow. That was an awkward conversation in which he wanted me to explain in detail everything we did. He was not pleased.

She could be stringing you along, but it doesn't seem that way. Why would she go to all that trouble? I think you just need to decide if she seems cool enough to wait until she's ready, or cut and run. Lots of people *coughkatcough* think its weird to meet people off the Internet, and need time to warm up to the idea. Then there are the logical folks who realize that we're all just people, and you're just as likely to meet a psycho out on the street as you are on the Internet.

Good luck.

Thanks for the insight. I'll give her a little while because she is pretty cool and unbearably hot.

[suprefan]

Is she a household name? I googled her now and recognize her from The Office, but you mentioning it is literally the first time I'd ever seen her name.

proof the guy living in bfe knows more than the guy who live in etertainment central.

[malcolmjamalawesome]

I like how none of you morons apparently noticed that the author is Mindy Kaling and that it is thus obviously satirical.

Yeah, morons.

[malcolmjamalawesome]

In case there was any confusion, as seems to be the case, let me clarify that the above photographed book pages were satire. No need to go on a woman-hating tangent, y'all.

There is always such a need.

[chairmenmeow47]

i love when people come in to a thread to point out that NO ONE has seen what they see yet when clearly a few other people did before their post.

<3 rick <3

[amyzzz]

Ugh. I thought Courtney was being serious in posting that because she is so classy.

[GuyInTucson]

Welp, in relation to a story I posted here a while back I have since heard back from the ex...and her new fellow. That was an awkward conversation in which he wanted me to explain in detail everything we did. He was not pleased.




Thanks for the insight. I'll give her a little while because she is pretty cool and unbearably hot.

Max, just give her a a little time and if she continues to do the same shit over and over, move on. Don't complicate it any more because you find her "hot".

[thewoodenman]

Good call Jason, I am not putting all my eggs in this one basket. Goin on a date with someone else this weekend. Also, your advice is that much better when I read it in Ron Swanson's voice.

[Courtney]

Ugh. I thought Courtney was being serious in posting that because she is so classy.

I think you are confusing "classy" with "snooty." Because mostly, I'm just the latter.

[Drinkey McDrinkerstein]

[thewoodenman]

^lolz

[Newro7ic]

Good call Jason, I am not putting all my eggs in this one basket. Goin on a date with someone else this weekend. Also, your advice is that much better when I read it in Ron Swanson's voice.

If she knows/thinks you're dating other women, it will make you more desirable. That's kind of how women work. So, this is a good idea.

[JustSteve]

Basically, I will only date you if you have an entire Bumble & Bumble store in your bathroom. You have been forewarned.

i prefer l'occitane. their baux deodorant is the greatest.

[miscorrections]

If she knows/thinks you're dating other women, it will make you more desirable. That's kind of how women work. So, this is a good idea.

Not always.

[JustSteve]

I know others that do too, but i haven't tried. I thought my feet were going to fall off after bringing only Chucks to San Francisco once. it could very well be an asphalt/grass difference.

My preferred sneakers are Nike Air Force ones. So nice. i have limited access to a wide variety of nice sneaker though, because of my very large shoe size. I would love to wear Puma, but they pretty much don't make anything larger than 13.

converse have always fucked my feet up, too narrow and lack of support. same with puma.

[Newro7ic]

Not always.

Rules. Exceptions. Etc.

[thewoodenman]

If she knows/thinks you're dating other women, it will make you more desirable. That's kind of how women work. So, this is a good idea.

hmm..interesting theory. so you're saying i should send her a picture message at 2 am of me banging some other girl, yes?

[JustSteve]

If I knew any guy that used Kiehl's or even heard of their products before I would die of shock.

i love their bar soap with the exfoliating stuff in it. please don't die, though.

this is my cologne, best i have ever used, pure parfum version:

[Newro7ic]

hmm..interesting theory. so you're saying i should send her a picture message at 2 am of me banging some other girl, yes?

Definitely.