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Thread: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

  1. #13531
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    P.S. I don't have chlamydia.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  2. #13532
    Coachella Junkie SoulDischarge's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I was going to assume he was until that follow up comment. It has to suck dating with HIV and I hope I never have to experience that, but you should at least be respectful of other people's decision to not want to have anonymous sex with you if you're positive.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Thanks for giving us the opportunity to not give a fuck again.

  3. #13533
    old school JorgeC's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    you could easily be a snarky dick back at him, but sounds like it's better to just move on.

    Yay for no chlamydia!
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Which healthcare provider will euthanize you the fastest as a service to society?
    Coachella W2 - 4/25 Dillinger Escape Plan@Glass House - 5/1 The Horrors@First Unitarian Church - 5/9 Big Freedia@Echoplex - 6/28 Robyn/Royksopp@Bill Graham

  4. #13534
    The Encyclopedia bmack86's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I was going to say that sexy fun time can definitely lead to HIV or something else. Thanks Patrick and Corinna for thinking.
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    Remember Hitler? I don't but here we are again .. cr****

  5. #13535
    Coachella Junkie fatbastard's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Hmmm
    Whiskey Sour

    2 oz blended whiskey
    Juice of 1/2 lemon
    1/2 tsp powdered sugar
    1 cherry
    1/2 slice lemon

    Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.

  6. #13536
    Coachella Junkie SoulDischarge's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    And abortions give you acne. Be smart kids!
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Thanks for giving us the opportunity to not give a fuck again.

  7. #13537
    Coachella Junkie Neighborhood Creep's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    P.S. I don't have chlamydia.
    It's not the worst thing in the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by gaypalmsprings View Post
    kvnty offered me 2 fists for one companion parking pass

  8. #13538
    Coachella Junkie getbetter's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    No wonder i have been getting amce products for the last decade.

    Simian Mobile Disco, Earth @ Pappy and Harriet's 04/26/15
    Austin Psych Fest @ Carson Creek Ranch 05/02-04/14
    The Decemberist @ Crystal Ballroom 05/30/14
    Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds @ The Warfield 07/07/14


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    Quote Originally Posted by psychic friend View Post
    thanks for whatever you did in mexico.



  9. #13539
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Swing and a miss.

    4/20: Godflesh, Cut Hands @ DNA Lounge
    4/21: The Men @ Rickshaw Stop
    4/26: Simian Mobile Disco, Earth @ Pappy and Harriet's
    5/2-5/4: Austin Psych Fest @ Carson Creek Ranch
    5/10: Joey Anderson @ TBA
    5/17: Kishi Bashi @ GAMH
    5/17: Move D b2b Optimo, Jackmaster, J.Phlip @ PW
    5/21: Baths @ The Independent
    5/30: The Decemberists @ The Crystal Ballroom
    6/27: Fuck Buttons @ The Independent
    6/28: Robyn & Royksopp @ Bill Graham

  10. #13540
    Coachella Junkie getbetter's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Well Neutrogena does sponsor me

    Simian Mobile Disco, Earth @ Pappy and Harriet's 04/26/15
    Austin Psych Fest @ Carson Creek Ranch 05/02-04/14
    The Decemberist @ Crystal Ballroom 05/30/14
    Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds @ The Warfield 07/07/14


    Last.fm
    Quote Originally Posted by psychic friend View Post
    thanks for whatever you did in mexico.



  11. #13541
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    For your amce?

    4/20: Godflesh, Cut Hands @ DNA Lounge
    4/21: The Men @ Rickshaw Stop
    4/26: Simian Mobile Disco, Earth @ Pappy and Harriet's
    5/2-5/4: Austin Psych Fest @ Carson Creek Ranch
    5/10: Joey Anderson @ TBA
    5/17: Kishi Bashi @ GAMH
    5/17: Move D b2b Optimo, Jackmaster, J.Phlip @ PW
    5/21: Baths @ The Independent
    5/30: The Decemberists @ The Crystal Ballroom
    6/27: Fuck Buttons @ The Independent
    6/28: Robyn & Royksopp @ Bill Graham

  12. #13542
    Coachella Junkie getbetter's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I was trying to do a pun for the products for how I do my abortions with the whole Amce

    Simian Mobile Disco, Earth @ Pappy and Harriet's 04/26/15
    Austin Psych Fest @ Carson Creek Ranch 05/02-04/14
    The Decemberist @ Crystal Ballroom 05/30/14
    Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds @ The Warfield 07/07/14


    Last.fm
    Quote Originally Posted by psychic friend View Post
    thanks for whatever you did in mexico.



  13. #13543

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    It's his large personality, right?

  14. #13544
    Coachella Junkie fatbastard's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Checking with the first base umpire...
    Whiskey Sour

    2 oz blended whiskey
    Juice of 1/2 lemon
    1/2 tsp powdered sugar
    1 cherry
    1/2 slice lemon

    Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.

  15. #13545
    Banned thelastgreatman's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by getbetter View Post
    I was trying to do a pun for the products for how I do my abortions with the whole Amce
    ... heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy





    Cara, next year at Coachella do you think you could host a night-long seminar on Thursday for the other women entitled, "How I Do It?"
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  16. #13546
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Why the hell would I do that? I don't want them stealing my man.

    4/20: Godflesh, Cut Hands @ DNA Lounge
    4/21: The Men @ Rickshaw Stop
    4/26: Simian Mobile Disco, Earth @ Pappy and Harriet's
    5/2-5/4: Austin Psych Fest @ Carson Creek Ranch
    5/10: Joey Anderson @ TBA
    5/17: Kishi Bashi @ GAMH
    5/17: Move D b2b Optimo, Jackmaster, J.Phlip @ PW
    5/21: Baths @ The Independent
    5/30: The Decemberists @ The Crystal Ballroom
    6/27: Fuck Buttons @ The Independent
    6/28: Robyn & Royksopp @ Bill Graham

  17. #13547

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Awwwwaaaah backhanded compliments are sooo romantic.

  18. #13548

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Punching in messages to shot-in-the-dark foreign phone numbers using Whatapp is more effective than Okcupid.
    The pilgrimage is not perfected save by copulation with the camel.

  19. #13549

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Me: just curious, but what's a "pro online dater"? They get paid here?

    : ...you would think they get paid, the number of people they meet online then dump. I've met a couple. Their whole social circle is online....not too healthy. Just my opinion

    Me: That’s too bad.
    The pilgrimage is not perfected save by copulation with the camel.

  20. #13550
    Member Santa's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Those of you still looking for love: You're all single forever.

  21. #13551
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I offered to evenly split the bill with my date, and he said, "Why don't you just pay for all of the booze you bought and I'll get the rest."

    4/20: Godflesh, Cut Hands @ DNA Lounge
    4/21: The Men @ Rickshaw Stop
    4/26: Simian Mobile Disco, Earth @ Pappy and Harriet's
    5/2-5/4: Austin Psych Fest @ Carson Creek Ranch
    5/10: Joey Anderson @ TBA
    5/17: Kishi Bashi @ GAMH
    5/17: Move D b2b Optimo, Jackmaster, J.Phlip @ PW
    5/21: Baths @ The Independent
    5/30: The Decemberists @ The Crystal Ballroom
    6/27: Fuck Buttons @ The Independent
    6/28: Robyn & Royksopp @ Bill Graham

  22. #13552
    Banned thelastgreatman's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by thelastgreatman View Post
    ... heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy





    Cara, next year at Coachella do you think you could host a night-long seminar on Thursday for the other women entitled, "How I Do It?"
    Alright, let's change the name of the seminar to, "How Lucky You Are"
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
    Fans of TheLastGreatMan Accessory Shop

  23. #13553
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    At a stampede event this evening - (still no excuse) - pick up line attempt # 1, from a very tall man while I'm standing waiting for my friends: "Man, I shit bigger than you. Take that as a compliment."
    Pick up line attempt # 2: " So .. You banging somebody regular?"

    Really??
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  24. #13554
    Banned thelastgreatman's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    My favorite line ever (delivered with an icey-confidence and Lafayette-From-True-Blood level negro swagger inflection):

    "Giiiiiiiiiiirl, you been rolling 'round in doggy doo-doo? Cause you look like THE SHIT."
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
    Fans of TheLastGreatMan Accessory Shop

  25. #13555
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Another classic - "You kind of remind me of my big toe- cuz I'm gonna bang you on the coffee table later."
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  26. #13556
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by locachica73 View Post
    but sexy fun rarely hurts, unless you are doing it wrong.
    You have a limited worldview.
    Quote Originally Posted by efrain44 View Post
    Anyone know who the guy in the Cardinals jersey is? I've seen him in pictures on the board and I thought I saw him this year.

  27. #13557
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Seriously. I missed that shit.
    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    i fucking hate women with their lives together who try and help other people. where are the needy bitches at?!

  28. #13558
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Amy, you didn't miss it, your signature comes from that very discussion.

    Yes, I know a lot of people enjoy pain with sex.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  29. #13559
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I didn't think she was referring to the conversation that she was missing.
    Quote Originally Posted by efrain44 View Post
    Anyone know who the guy in the Cardinals jersey is? I've seen him in pictures on the board and I thought I saw him this year.

  30. #13560
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Sometimes I skim over things without reading them. I have bad reading comprehension, which is why people think I'm stupid all the time.
    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    i fucking hate women with their lives together who try and help other people. where are the needy bitches at?!

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