It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

[Robin]

You and like 90% of Asian chicks. This is why it's baffling that there are not a ton of Asian guys left over for me.

Oh, they're there. But you said you like tall Asians. That really narrows down the pool by A LOT.

[Kyliediscope]

I'm not white... well, not on the outside.
I'm a total twinkie.

That was in reference to me.

[MoSetsfire]

I hope this doesn't come off as racist, but white girls tend to be the lowest maintenance girls. Middle Eastern girls are borderline insane.

[fikus222]

I have a thing for tall honkies.

And I like mocha skinned women. We should hang out more

[chiapet]

Oh, they're there. But you said you like tall Asians. That really narrows down the pool by A LOT.

Robin, you know I'm short. Most guys are taller than me.

I *prefer* really tall guys but like 5'7" or 5'8" is tall enough.

[HotHamWater]

That was in reference to me.

Naturally.

[chiapet]

Also, have I mentioned, OKcupid "locals" is insane if you are female?

I've logged into it like 2 or 3 times. Each time I've gotten DOZENS of messages within a couple of hours.

Presently trying to figure out if I should respond to any of the 40+ messages I got last night, since I'm presuming most of them were just hoping to find someone to fuck that night.

[Robin]

That was in reference to me.

Ha! Oops. I thought you were referencing both of us.

And I like mocha skinned women. We should hang out more

Hey baby. What's up? Give me a call sometime. *wink*

Robin, you know I'm short. Most guys are taller than me.

I *prefer* really tall guys but like 5'7" or 5'8" is tall enough.

That still really narrowed down the pool. Lol.
I'd totally hook you up with my brother, but he's only 5'4"

[Courtney]

Heidi what is OKC Locals?

[guedita]

Hahahaha. Yes, Heidi....explain it.

[guedita]

I had a most excellent first date yesterday evening. We went record shopping and then drank beers. I made fun of his midwestern accent.

[Courtney]

Cara, I am impressed by how much you are putting yourself out there. Massive high fives.

[Kyliediscope]

Naturally.

yes. When I know that Robin is Asian and we were talking about personal preferences.

[chiapet]

Robin, I'm not quite 5'4". I dated a guy my height once. We wore the same size shoes, too. We used to swap footwear. LOL. (Just boots and stuff... )

Courtney, it's on the phone apps, it's a feature that lets you broadcast messages (and if you want, set availability to meet up with other people). Then it shows you people who are geographically very close, who have also said that they are available. You can see their profiles from the app, and then can send them a "let's meet" message. I haven't done that, but I've gotten a ton of those messages when I've signed on. (At some point last night, I was showing Cara, because my phone was beeping every few minutes with more "so and so wants to meet you" messages. LOL).

That is how I got my first OKCupid date, the really bad one. BUT, I will note that the quality / hotness of the guys who've contacted me that way is far far far far far far higher than the ones who've just found me browsing the site. I'm assuming it's because not many women use that feature, and also it only shows you a handful of profiles.

[chiapet]

Hahahaha. Yes, Heidi....explain it.

Look, I put my phone away after you yelled at me. Well, no, I put it away after posting on facebook that you told me to stop playing on OKCupid and to put my phone away.

At least I didn't send a bunch of drunk texts. I did send Salah one about you letting guys dance up on you and then telling them you had OCD. LOL.

[Courtney]

That sounds like a neat feature. Maybe I should install the phone app. I wonder what the parameters are for "very close."

Also, the dude I am totally infatuated with took me bowling. While getting shoes at the counter, I learned his feet are significantly larger than mine. This is a bonus. I don't think I'd want to be able to share shoes.

[scenicworld]

I had a most excellent first date yesterday evening. We went record shopping and then drank beers. I made fun of his midwestern accent.

[chiapet]

I"m not sure what cut off they use for "very close," but here in SF, it's shown me people in the same neighborhood that I was in when I set my status. Like, last night I was in Union Square, and it showed me only guys in Union Square, SOMA and the Financial District. It has an option for you to actually state where you are location wise or to suggest a place that you will go to meet.

Sometime when I have more free time, and I have some wing women in tow, I want to dress up cute, and like, go stalk these guys who actually say where they are... see if they are cute, and if they are cute, chat them up and convince them to buy me/us drinks.

Most of the guys I've dated have been well over 6' and had huge feet. So no shoe sharing. It was a nice novelty though, with that guy, because we both had a bunch of awesome Docs and such.

[guedita]

Hahahahahahaha I completely forgot about telling guys that I couldn't dance with them because of my OCD until just now. Singledrunkcara really is a riot.

[chiapet]

Singledrunkcara IS a riot. I'm kind of embarrassed to ever go back there though, after the conversation with the coat check guys.*

*Who -- I could be wrong because I was pretty drunk too -- I remember being pretty cute and they seemed WAY into the conversation.

[Courtney]

Go on...

[chiapet]

Go on...

No, you will just have to get into Berkeley, move here, and then experience it in person.

[guedita]

Yeah, go on. I don't remember talking to the coat check guys.

[Still-ill]

I hope this doesn't come off as racist, but white girls tend to be the lowest maintenance girls. Middle Eastern girls are borderline insane.

Good news.

[Robin]

Sometime when I have more free time, and I have some wing women in tow, I want to dress up cute, and like, go stalk these guys who actually say where they are... see if they are cute, and if they are cute, chat them up and convince them to buy me/us drinks.

This actually sounds fun! But I don't know how to dress cute, let alone own any "cute" clothes.

[chiapet]

You were relaying to me what was going on with the Moroccan? French? I don't know? guy. In great detail. I kept saying, "Why don't we continue this conversation when we get home?"

The coat check guys kept saying, "No, PLEASE, continue this conversation now."

They were cracking up, especially as you tried to figure out where he'd said he was from, and I helpfully told you he was 'brown." (Both the coat check guys were, erhm, brown, too. They didn't get offended. They were laughing at us). And then you actually told them that you were having a great time with him UNTIL you realized 1) the guy was not a very good kisser and 2) [ you remember this part ].

[chiapet]

This actually sounds fun! But I don't know how to dress cute, let alone own any "cute" clothes.

Yea, my idea of cute is mostly likely just awkward. I went dancing last night in a really clingy/silky shirt that just made me feel really sweaty. Hah.

[herro kitty]

Alright.. I am in need of some real advice.

My boyfriend dumped me because he developed feelings for another woman and couldn't decide who to be with. Even though it killed my pride, I fought for him for a good two months. It seems like I lost, though. How do I stop sinking to a blackhole of despair because I couldn't keep (who I thought was) the love of my life? I am very bitter and angry and hurt and wish I could fast-forward time. I thought I was a badass bitch who was strong and awesome and shit... but apparently not.

TLDR: Breakups suck.

[chairmenmeow47]

you ARE a badass bitch who deserves nothing less than a guy who loves you as much as you love him. rejection never feels good, but i hope time apart will help you move on i love you!!!!

[chiapet]

Barb, you are a badass bitch. Breakups stink, and it's very hard to deal with one without feeling angry and losing some confidence. But, that he chose to be with someone else... well, it SUCKS, but it doesn't than you are anything less than wonderful. For whatever reason, he couldn't see that. Some other guy will. I think once you get out there and really start trying to attract guys, you'll see that there are tons who would be happy to be with you.