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Thread: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

  1. #2911
    Coachella Junkie chiapet's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Kat, you've mentioned before that you see a therapist. I assume you've talked with him/her about social anxiety? If you truly are not fishing for compliments and reassurance here, and are that "mortified" at the idea of talking to another person, this is something far better suited for conversation with your therapist than with internet strangers.

  2. #2912
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by Alchemy View Post
    Wanna join my baaaaand?
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    Yea I think a lot of men think they are bad ass, but a 12 year old with a AK can take me out I know ...... cr****

  3. #2913
    old school Robin's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Ugh. I can't believe I just wasted all this time catching up on this thread.

    It makes me want to drink when I get home tonight, then return with a reply on how I truly feel.

  4. #2914
    Coachella Junkie Mugwog's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Do it

    Or weekly: bust out spiderman cuz it's turning into a Kat thread again

  5. #2915
    Entry level Alt kitt kat's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Ugh, I just spent 10 minutes crying in my car. I am a failure

  6. #2916
    Coachella Junkie Mugwog's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Do you masturbate?

  7. #2917
    Member Hysteria's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I find it kind of hard to believe that the woman in the pic up there is having a hard time finding a relationship! She's very attractive. Of course I haven't read any of the past 98 pages so I have no idea whats wrong with her, if anything.

    But on another note, I just recently got into a relationship this past month after purposely avoiding any serious relationships for about 3 years. I don't wanna divulge too much here but it's weird, things with this girl are going kinda fast. The way I feel for her now is how I felt about another chick after about 7 months into that relationship. It's a little frightening because I'm not the type to allow myself to feel vulnerable to anyone that I just met a couple of months ago.

    So I ask of you boardies, do you think my strong feelings for this girl are merely because I haven't allowed myself to get close to anyone for several years? Should I slow things down?

  8. #2918
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Kat, I'm sorry you are feeling low. I understand what you're going through and it sucks. It will get better with practice.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  9. #2919
    Member MoSetsfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating




    thats you? gtfo. You have a very warped sense of self-perception. You are very cute.
    Quote Originally Posted by nerdtram View Post
    if you can't pull off getting drugs into a festival and consuming them, you don't deserve them.
    Quote Originally Posted by ods.. View Post
    Wait. You like Cudi but you think Outkast is a one hit wonder.

    Somebody shoot this fuck.

  10. #2920
    Coachella Junkie chiapet's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I don't think you should slow things down unless there are other reasons, warning signs, that you should not develop strong feelings for this person. Sometimes it just happens, why fight it? Are you worried that your feelings for her are stronger than hers for you, or is it just a matter of thinking it's too early in the relationship to care so much? If the latter (and provided she feels similarly), holding back probably only risks jeopardizing the growing relationship.

  11. #2921
    Coachella Junkie Mugwog's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Well I feel the more you date the more you know what you want and what you don't. If she's good to you and you're good to her. Go for it. Especially if you have minimal conflicts and when you do you can speak about them like adults and reason rather than bicker.

  12. #2922
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    And everyone else can just shut the fuck up about Kat.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  13. #2923
    Chest Rockwell Gribbz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    ^ Oh go fuck yourself. We've been trying to help her.
    Quote Originally Posted by nathanfairchild View Post
    Has Pitchfork revealed it's top 200 covers by Arcade Fire yet?

    Jamie xx - 8/27 - The Mohawk
    Little Dragon - 8/31 - Moody Theater
    Ty Segall - 9/5 - The Mohawk
    Seth Troxler - 9/5 - Vulcan Gas Company
    Black Lips/King Khan & BBQ Show - 9/12 - J. Lorraine Ghost Town
    DJ Shadow/Cut Chemist - 9/18 - Moody Theater

  14. #2924
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    I texted The Effeminate Laugher to say that I wasn't interested in going on a second date and he responded IMMEDIATELY with:

    Let me know if you change your mind. We could always just be friends.

    8/16: Anthony Naples, Maxmillion Dunbar @ f8
    8/18: Man Man @ The Chapel
    8/23-8/24: FYF Fest
    8/30: Peaking Lights @ The Chapel
    9/3: Bear in Heaven @ The Independent
    9/24 - 28: Decibel Festival
    10/5: The War on Drugs, Cass McCombs @ The Fillmore
    10/18-19: Treasure Island Music Festival

  15. #2925
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by chiapet View Post
    I don't think you should slow things down unless there are other reasons, warning signs, that you should not develop strong feelings for this person. Sometimes it just happens, why fight it? Are you worried that your feelings for her are stronger than hers for you, or is it just a matter of thinking it's too early in the relationship to care so much? If the latter (and provided she feels similarly), holding back probably only risks jeopardizing the growing relationship.
    I'm not worried that my feelings are stronger for her than hers are for me. She's reciprocated how I felt for her.

    I guess it is just that I think it might be too early for me to feel that way about someone.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mugwog View Post
    Well I feel the more you date the more you know what you want and what you don't. If she's good to you and you're good to her. Go for it. Especially if you have minimal conflicts and when you do you can speak about them like adults and reason rather than bicker.
    Yea that's one thing that I absolutely love about this girl. She doesn't play any of those bullshit high school games. If there's something wrong we can just talk about it with no beating around the bush shenanigans.

    Thanks for the insight! I still feel a bit strange about it but I won't let that hold me back from expressing how I truly feel about her

  16. #2926
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by Mugwog View Post
    Do you masturbate?
    I think this is a really good question. Kat?

  17. #2927
    Entry level Alt kitt kat's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Even if I did, I don't see how that would help with the crippling social anxiety, the overwhelming feeling of FOREVER ALONE and the intense self-loathing I've been experiencing since getting my heart broken.

  18. #2928
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Maybe you feel that way because you HAVEN'T been masturbating? It's a good release, you should try it sometime.

  19. #2929
    Chest Rockwell Gribbz's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by kitt kat View Post
    Even if I did, I don't see how that would help with the crippling social anxiety, the overwhelming feeling of FOREVER ALONE and the intense self-loathing I've been experiencing since getting my heart broken.
    Have you considered trying and accepting ANY of the advice we've given you today? I feel like all of this is going through one ear and out the other.


    EDIT* This is why people think you're fishing for compliments. You come to this thread and don't accept any of the advice anybody offers. Same process over and over.
    Last edited by Gribbz; 02-27-2012 at 04:20 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by nathanfairchild View Post
    Has Pitchfork revealed it's top 200 covers by Arcade Fire yet?

    Jamie xx - 8/27 - The Mohawk
    Little Dragon - 8/31 - Moody Theater
    Ty Segall - 9/5 - The Mohawk
    Seth Troxler - 9/5 - Vulcan Gas Company
    Black Lips/King Khan & BBQ Show - 9/12 - J. Lorraine Ghost Town
    DJ Shadow/Cut Chemist - 9/18 - Moody Theater

  20. #2930

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    From personal experience, I think those strong feelings are because you havent been close to anyone in several years and that is what you remember what a relationship should be. The fact you are asking if you should slow down, on face, indicates that you are going too fast. But I think whether to slow down or not depends on the other girl. If she is okay with the pace then I would guess it is okay. On the other hand if it is you who is initiating the pace then it might be a good idea to step back and slow it down so that both of you are comfortable. Should be something to talk out.

    edit to note that i need to type faster on this board
    Last edited by lt.roast.a.botch; 02-27-2012 at 04:20 PM.

  21. #2931

    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Forget it.

  22. #2932
    Coachella Junkie chiapet's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by Hysteria View Post
    I'm not worried that my feelings are stronger for her than hers are for me. She's reciprocated how I felt for her.

    I guess it is just that I think it might be too early for me to feel that way about someone.
    Well, as long as the other person isn't out of sync with how you're feeling, I don't think there is really a 'too early.' Granted, we probably all know people who "fall in love" constantly -- that's concerning -- but since this isn't a pattern for you, I say go with it. My parents only knew each other for a couple of months before they got married... they divorced eventually but they had 20+ happy years first.

    It's definitely scary, there was one guy I dated that I absolutely adored after only a few WEEKS, more or less let him move in with me at that point - something I didn't allow guys I'd dated for over a year to do. It didn't work out, but I don't regret the relationship or caring about him so much and so early.

    Edited to add: Neither of us had been out of the market for very long either, and we were both the type to not be very forthcoming expressing our feelings, so it was unexpected and unsettling. Our friends took great pleasure in teasing us about it.

  23. #2933
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Self love can be the hardest to achieve. If masturbation is awkward or unsatisfying, i think it says a lot.

    You've shared most every other aspect of your dating and internal turmoil. Why would this topic be off limits?

  24. #2934
    Coachella Junkie Mugwog's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    I texted The Effeminate Laugher to say that I wasn't interested in going on a second date and he responded IMMEDIATELY with:
    Awwwwwww!

  25. #2935
    Coachella Junkie GuyInTucson's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating


  26. #2936
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    I only ever get hit on by nerdy hipster types when I'm secretly pining after the cholos at the end of the bar. It's a rough life.
    this made me LOL for real.
    .................................................. ..............
    She added the phrase "meany head" to my profile.
    I hardly think I'm an attention whore.
    I train birds of prey and am I licensed falconer

  27. #2937
    Coachella Junkie chiapet's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by Dale Gribble View Post
    Have you considered trying and accepting ANY of the advice we've given you today? I feel like all of this is going through one ear and out the other.


    EDIT* This is why people think you're fishing for compliments. You come to this thread and don't accept any of the advice anybody offers. Same process over and over.
    I agree, and I don't know why you even post on this thread when you reject any advice you're given and don't seem willing to change your approach, even after asking why it's not working.

    If your approach is not working, and has never worked, then you either have to change it, or become comfortable being alone. I'm not trying to be harsh, just blunt. It's a lesson I've had to learn myself, and while it's hard to act outside of my comfort zone, I decided the alternative (being single all the time, or at least never getting the interest of guys I'm into) was no longer an option. I have made a fool of myself a few times by hitting on people who turned out to not be interested, and it was mortifying for a while, but I survived it.

  28. #2938
    Milkshake suprefan's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    And everyone else can just shut the fuck up about Kat.
    Just like you should just shut the fuck up in general?

  29. #2939
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by lt.roast.a.botch View Post
    From personal experience, I think those strong feelings are because you havent been close to anyone in several years and that is what you remember what a relationship should be. The fact you are asking if you should slow down, on face, indicates that you are going too fast. But I think whether to slow down or not depends on the other girl. If she is okay with the pace then I would guess it is okay. On the other hand if it is you who is initiating the pace then it might be a good idea to step back and slow it down so that both of you are comfortable. Should be something to talk out.

    edit to note that i need to type faster on this board
    She kinda set the pace! But I didn't find myself having a problem with it at all so I went along with it.

    Quote Originally Posted by chiapet View Post
    Well, as long as the other person isn't out of sync with how you're feeling, I don't think there is really a 'too early.' Granted, we probably all know people who "fall in love" constantly -- that's concerning -- but since this isn't a pattern for you, I say go with it. My parents only knew each other for a couple of months before they got married... they divorced eventually but they had 20+ happy years first.

    It's definitely scary, there was one guy I dated that I absolutely adored after only a few WEEKS, more or less let him move in with me at that point - something I didn't allow guys I'd dated for over a year to do. It didn't work out, but I don't regret the relationship or caring about him so much and so early.

    Edited to add: Neither of us had been out of the market for very long either, and we were both the type to not be very forthcoming expressing our feelings, so it was unexpected and unsettling. Our friends took great pleasure in teasing us about it.
    I'm not afraid of the possibility that the relationship won't work out. I'll take it as a learning experience of sorts. It's just really unexpected for me because, like you said, I'm not of the people that "falls in love" quickly. Our relationship sounds very similar to yours. My ex wanted to get a place with me and I kindly rejected her offer, but with my current lady we've already discussed the possibility of moving in together. It's very unsettling but in the best way possible!

  30. #2940
    Milkshake suprefan's Avatar
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    Default Re: It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    Someone should start "The Thread In Which We Psychoanalyze Kit Katt's Text Messages and Sex Life".
    Don't hipsters communicate via land lines?

    Quote Originally Posted by Alchemy View Post
    It is perfectly fine to act disinterested when you are not interested.


    I recommend that you talk with these cholos so that you may build your social confidence. After all, there aren't many people more frightening than cholos.
    But girls act disinterested when THEY ARE interested also. Its a no win, cause all ya'll bitchez are just fucking weird.

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