It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

[Courtney]

I mean, here's one from about 35 seconds ago:



Seriously?

[faxman75]

Do you have any of their numbers?

Ha, no I don't.

[Gribbz]

I put up a new photo and received an avalanche of messages, but not a single one from someone I would actually go on a date with. This is troublesome.

I wish they wouldn't put non-locals in my news feed.

[Courtney]

I wish they wouldn't put non-locals in my news feed.

Oh, that's weird. These are mostly locals, but just completely illiterate locals.

[lehorne]

One of my ole Iowa based co-workers always used “sweetie” as a chat up (“How you doin, sweetie?”). Customers and non-business related women alike. He influenced me so much that I started using it too with generally favorable responsiveness. The only ones who didn’t really care for it were husbands when said in front of them directly towards their wives. Maybe a bit too much familiarity there unless you’ve known them for a while.

I know women don’t like “dude” or “man” that much, so kinda dropped that from the arsenal as well after a brief trial.

[MoSetsfire]

One of my ole Iowa based co-workers always used “sweetie” as a chat up (“How you doin, sweetie?”). Customers and non-business related women alike. He influenced me so much that I started using it too with generally favorable responsiveness. The only ones who didn’t really care for it were husbands when said in front of them directly towards their wives. Maybe a bit too much familiarity there unless you’ve known them for a while.

I know women don’t like “dude” or “man” that much, so kinda dropped that from the arsenal as well after a brief trial.

I call some of my girl friends "bro." took them a little to get used to it. I dont even know how it started.

[lehorne]

"How do you feel about sweetie, sweetie?"

[RageAgainstTheAoki]

I used to have an OKC profile. On the "the first thing people notice about me" question, I said "the goiter". Most took this as a silly joke, but it did lead to some interesting responses. One of which contained the prospective mister's recommendations for goiter massage oils and cremes. It had an alarming degree of specificity.

So, I'm planning on going to India in 2013. Very first trip to the motherland. I've heard from family over there about how things have dramatically liberalized over the last decade or so, so I thought I might check the 'scene' out. Joined a dating site for gents of the sub-cont; just to check things out. There are a lot of bad poets on there. I think they're getting their ideals of love and romance from Bollywood. It's all heart-pounding stuff; terribly profound and lightly scented with rose petals and incense. Those romantic types also tend to call you "dear" a lot. Calling a perfect stranger? Another man? Dear? They sound like old aunties. Luckily, they're only about... 50% of the guys on there? BTW, there must be something in the water in Bangalore. There is a huge concentration of highly educated, culturally savvy and ridiculously good looking guys there. I guess I'll have to arrange a tour of the major call centers of Bangalore.

[lehorne]

I guess I'll have to arrange a tour of the major call centers of Bangalore.

"I'm here to speak with David"

"We're all David, my friend"

[faxman75]

I just sent my first message. She's a Rachel Maddow look-a-like. Heh. We had many things in common though and an 88% match.

[SoulDischarge]

Well if she thinks like Rachel Maddow as well, you know she'll be able to withstand your Facebook posts.

[downingthief]

I mean, here's one from about 35 seconds ago:



Seriously?

What, that won't work?

[Alchemy]

I want to make an OKCupid account to see how I match with all of you, but I don't want to be an eligible date on the site. Is there an unavailable option?

[Courtney]

I want to make an OKCupid account to see how I match with all of you, but I don't want to be an eligible date on the site. Is there an unavailable option?

Yes, you can put you are married or something like that. Although people might try to contact you anyway.

[Alchemy]

An intriguing challenge.

[SoulDischarge]

Or just make your profile as horrific and offputting as possible. Use board personalities for inspiration.

[faxman75]

Well if she thinks like Rachel Maddow as well, you know she'll be able to withstand your Facebook posts.

I know, right?! I hope she replies. There is also an attractive roller derby girl I dig. I'll have to message her next.

[Alchemy]

I put "I am seeing someone/here for friends." That was the closest thing to "I am seeing which Coachella boardie I should hypothetically get dirty with."

[HotHamWater]

Fax, post the message you sent so we can critique.

[Alchemy]

The website went down as I was trying to make my profile. Love is dead.

[Courtney]

Fax, post the message you sent so we can critique.

YES!

[Cameron Frye]

I mean, here's one from about 35 seconds ago:



Seriously?

I'm enamored with u

better?

[Alchemy]

Wait... You can find enemies on OKCupid!? This is something relevant to my interests.

[Robin]

Wait... You can find enemies on OKCupid!? This is something relevant to my interests.

I'm usually tempted to message people who have a significantly high enemies percentage.

[Robin]

I mean, here's one from about 35 seconds ago:



Seriously?

It got your attention!

Not sure why, but the "u" bothers me. How hard is it to type in "yo" before that "u"? It's not like the letters are on opposite ends of the keyboard.

[Miroir Noir]

U R obviously not a Prince fan.

[faxman75]

Fax, post the message you sent so we can critique.

Oh fuck. I missed a spelling error. This is going to be terrible but here it goes...

By the way she mentions she is a fan of The National in her profile it wasn't just a guess based on her name.

Hi lemonworld,

Great song and a great band. Does my nerd status increas if I say I have Alligator on green vinyl and Boxer on yellow? I'm quite obsessed with political and current event discussions as well. Anyway, I saw we had a bit in common and wanted to send you a message. I moved near downtown Phoenix last weekend and i'm looking to meet some new people, and that's not to say i'm a loner because I certainly have friends. I'm looking to explore the area a little more. I hope to make it to filmbar in the next few weeks and see what type of internet cafe's are around too. So what part of the valley do you live in? When and where have you seen the National? heh.

Mark

[SoulDischarge]

Oh man. Bragging about your vinyl collection in the second sentance. Doooooooooomed.

[Miroir Noir]

If she has a sense of humor, she'll respond with "I heard that you have a CD compilation of every good '60s cut and another box set from the '70s."

[Robin]

Saying that you're not a loner put up a red flag for me. But don't listen to me. I'm the one that doesn't like "u."