It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

[NachoCat]

This definitely has the "Most depressing thread of 2012" award already locked down.

[Goatchella]

Hahaha hurtin

[Gribbz]

I don't like it when guys call their girlfriend/wife as "babe," because I think he can only do that if he has a mullet or is wearing a leather jacket.

I kind of cringe when people call me "dear." Sounds like something a Grandma would say.

[Goatchella]

you really think i was fucking being serious when i referenced the 20s?

i had a Portlandia skit in my head and it just popped out

Is this a new hipster excuse for doing dumb things?

Blame it on portlandia.

[amyzzz]

I don't mind darlin and dear if the person saying it is Southern and/or black, for some reason, maybe because it is just part of their vernacular.

[Gribbz]

Is this a new hipster excuse for doing dumb things?

Blame it on portlandia.

Hahahhaa.

[stinkbutt]

I don't mind darlin and dear if the person saying it is Southern and/or black, for some reason, maybe because it is just part of their vernacular.

Fucking incredible

[psychic friend]

i say darling and dear because i think its funny that it sounds so old. so its more of a joke thing. dont like lady or ma'am. ok with girl, chick, babe. not ok with baby.. my 2 cents. as an over 30 "woman". hahaha

[mountmccabe]

The American and the girl with him sat at a table in the shade, outside the building. It was very hot and the express from Barcelona would come in forty minutes. It stopped at this junction for two minutes and went on to Madrid.
"What should we drink?" the girl asked. She had taken off her hat and put it on the table.
"It's pretty hot," the man said. "Let's drink beer."
"Dos cervezas," the man said into the curtain.
"Big ones?" a woman asked from the doorway.
"Yes. Two big ones."
The woman brought two glasses of beer and two felt pads. She put the felt pads and the beer glasses on the table and looked at the man and the girl. The girl was looking off at the line of hills. They were white in the sun and the country was brown and dry.
"They look like white elephants," she said.

--Hill Like White Elephants, Ernest Hemingway, 1927

I always figured that Jig was actually a girl, that she was like 17. There's not a lot of clues but she talks rather young.

EDIT: Wait a minute. Also: you're trying to prove the point with fiction? With fiction from Hemingway, of all people?

[BROKENDOLL]

While I agree with you in principle, we've had this discussion before. None of what you said matters without attraction.

And it's the principle that counts. I wonder if bachelor #1 would become more attractive if he were to lose his attention in her? Do you suppose he would then also be a jerk?

[faxman75]

Are people generally answering the drug questions honestly or is no the better reply? I smoke weed but I don't want someone thinking i'm a junkie, ya know?

Tips?

[Gribbz]

Are people generally answering the drug questions honestly or is no the better reply? I smoke weed but I don't want someone thinking i'm a junkie, ya know?

Tips?

I was hesitant at first, but being honest about it has actually worked out for the best. At least so far.

I mean, they'll match you up with people who either smoke weed or people who don't mind if their BF/GF does.

[faxman75]

Gotcha. I noticed blank was an option so I left it blank. ha.

[MoSetsfire]

Gotcha. I noticed blank was an option so I left it blank. ha.

They need an intermediate answer for the hard drugs one. Its not like im raging everyday, but I like to rage occasionally.

[Robin]

Just explain your answer in the box.
For the drug questions, I seldom ever do drugs.
Maybe once or twice every few years.
I have no issues with a person occasionally doing drugs, but I don't want to be someone who smokes weed all the time, or rolls every weekend, or shoots up and whatnot.

[Gribbz]

And that's why you should be honest on these things.

EDIT* A lot of people dislike weed. In fact, it's a deal breaker for some people. I don't know why you wouldn't want these people filtered out (unless you're willing to give up weed for him/her).

[Goatchella]

Just like a job interview...always blow it. Tell them you drink heavily and party hardy.

That way if you get hired there is nothing but improvement to show. If you lie though, and you pretend to be better than you are you have no room to improve andyou will have to maintain this standard.

Same for relationships. When you candy coat it and fake it your going to end up failing.

Example: at first he dressed nice, he had money on dates, he was sober and I was happy.
Three months down the line he is not grooming himself, he is a broke fuck and he is always drugged up.


So if you blow it from the start, and she loves you for who you really are ( a filthy loser)
Then you can improve. Nowhere but up. Like snapping on your clip on tie and going to Easter mass.
Playin the role. Doin the bull dance. Workin it.

[BROKENDOLL]

I have heard guys that call their girlfriend/wife "mommas."

Pete does this on occasion and it makes me want to grab him by the earlobe, throw him over my knee, and paddle his little behind with my fist.

[SoulDischarge]

I have heard guys that call their girlfriend/wife "mommas."

Some guys call their boyfriends "papi."

[BROKENDOLL]

Just like a job interview...always blow it. Tell them you drink heavily and party hardy.

That way if you get hired there is nothing but improvement to show. If you lie though, and you pretend to be better than you are you have no room to improve andyou will have to maintain this standard.

Same for relationships. When you candy coat it and fake it your going to end up failing.

Example: at first he dressed nice, he had money on dates, he was sober and I was happy.
Three months down the line he is not grooming himself, he is a broke fuck and he is always drugged up.


So if you blow it from the start, and she loves you for who you really are ( a filthy loser)
Then you can improve. Nowhere but up. Like snapping on your clip on tie and going to Easter mass.
Playin the role. Doin the bull dance. Workin it.

If that clip-on tie in church turns into a Chippendales bow tie afterwards, I'm sold.

[chiapet]

Are people generally answering the drug questions honestly or is no the better reply? I smoke weed but I don't want someone thinking i'm a junkie, ya know?

Tips?

I answer them honestly but leave the "Drugs?" question on the main profile blank (just as I leave a few other controversial ones blank). It's not to mislead potential dates, but more that I don't want coworkers and such to come across my profile and see that. (I know they could dig more deeply and find answers to the questions, but that's an awful lot of stalking and I feel like they wouldn't admit they'd looked that closely).

Most of the questions differentiate between pot and 'hard drugs'.

[M Sparks]

Most nicknames are terrible, they are a verbal crutch, not a term of endearment. I don't think I fall into using them, but I'm probably wrong. I usually use some version of a real name. My ex-wife called me Dadoo sometimes. I think it was from Animaniacs. It was more for practical purposes though...if she lost me in a store or public place, she would yell "DADOOOOOOOO". She tried to get me to do the same thing and pick a stupid name for her. It was Sneech, but I don't remember ever really using it in public.

[faxman75]

I answer them honestly but leave the "Drugs?" question on the main profile blank (just as I leave a few other controversial ones blank). It's not to mislead potential dates, but more that I don't want coworkers and such to come across my profile and see that. (I know they could dig more deeply and find answers to the questions, but that's an awful lot of stalking and I feel like they wouldn't admit they'd looked that closely).

Most of the questions differentiate between pot and 'hard drugs'.

This is what I did and with that I now have a profile on OK Cupid. It will be interesting to see how this pans out. This will be the first real go I have given a dating site. I've met people back in the day on some singles chat lines and in local yahoo chat rooms but we are talking more than a decade ago and none of them were really winners.

[bmack86]

Hi thread.

I had a great date last night. Woke up this morning to a text from her, just saying hi.

[Alchemy]

SUCCSEX!

[bluemamba]

If that clip-on tie in church turns into a Chippendales bow tie afterwards, I'm sold.

Smh....

[bluemamba]

Just like a job interview...always blow it. Tell them you drink heavily and party hardy.

That way if you get hired there is nothing but improvement to show. If you lie though, and you pretend to be better than you are you have no room to improve andyou will have to maintain this standard.

Same for relationships. When you candy coat it and fake it your going to end up failing.

Example: at first he dressed nice, he had money on dates, he was sober and I was happy.
Three months down the line he is not grooming himself, he is a broke fuck and he is always drugged up.


So if you blow it from the start, and she loves you for who you really are ( a filthy loser)
Then you can improve. Nowhere but up. Like snapping on your clip on tie and going to Easter mass.
Playin the role. Doin the bull dance. Workin it.

That's a good approach. I would take it one step further though. Not bathing. Driving a fucked up old car. My shirt has a tear. Just straight up dirty. Whatever is left at the end of the filter, that's your keeper. Then when you start getting back to normal, you can say you did it for her (looking deep into her eyes). It's romantic.

[BROKENDOLL]

That's a good approach. I would take it one step further though. Not bathing. Driving a fucked up old car. My shirt has a tear. Just straight up dirty. Whatever is left at the end of the filter, that's your keeper. Then when you start getting back to normal, you can say you did it for her (looking deep into her eyes). It's romantic.

Smh...

[M Sparks]

I've met people back in the day on some singles chat lines and in local yahoo chat rooms but we are talking more than a decade ago and none of them were really winners.

Do you have any of their numbers?

[Courtney]

I put up a new photo and received an avalanche of messages, but not a single one from someone I would actually go on a date with. This is troublesome.

But to respond to the above: YAY BRYAN. Those are the best sort of texts