It Rubs The Lotion On Its Skin: A Thread About Dating

[venturas90sgirl]

That's why I could never bring myself to do those. I thought about it a few years back. MY DAD of all people kept pushing me to do eHarmony and I refused. It pays not to listen to parents sometimes.

[GuyInTucson]

Mugwog you shared entirely too much fucking information there.

[Goatchella]

Hahaha I was eating Greek yogurt while reading mugwogs yeast report.

Yogurt still tastes like honey and granola hahaha

[Courtney]

Oh, also, I'm going to put this out there:

If anyone wants to help me write my introductory paragraph on my online dating profile, that would be pretty awesome. I'm completely stuck on what to put. Weeklymix helped me with one aspect of my profile when I was first writing it, and it's probably the thing that gets the most positive comments out of the entire page -- so I trust in you all and your online dating abilities! Many of you know me quite well, so I would take any sort of suggestions for a few sentences to put under the heading "My Self-Summary."

[summerkid]

Wow. It's not this at all. I am glad me being honest and open is interpreted as being a self-centered cunt. Thanks!



Everyone keeps mentioning body language. I mean, I dunno how to know what it is I'm doing exactly that people are misinterpreting? Maybe someone needs to do a PI-type investigation and watch me in a social setting and then sit me down the next day and tell me everything I did wrong. Sigh

You are asking for advice and I gave it. Sorry that it wasn't to your liking but Courtney is right, a positive attitude about yourself goes a long way. If you are spending too much time feeling sorry for yourself it can become a black hole that allows you to be too self-centered.

[kitt kat]

Oh, also, I'm going to put this out there:

If anyone wants to help me write my introductory paragraph on my online dating profile, that would be pretty awesome. I'm completely stuck on what to put. Weeklymix helped me with one aspect of my profile when I was first writing it, and it's probably the thing that gets the most positive comments out of the entire page -- so I trust in you all and your online dating abilities! Many of you know me quite well, so I would take any sort of suggestions for a few sentences to put under the heading "My Self-Summary."

Does it say, "My name is Courtney and I am awesome"??? Because it should.

[bucketofpower]

I'll jump in as I've been on POF for some time and have had some funny experiences.

Black Cloud of Dating...Commence:

The first girl I believed I was going to hang out with had called me one night, before we had even met, bitching to me about how people try to take advantage of her. She then got in her car, drunk, and drove home. Yeahnothanks.

I met another girl from there where she seemed pretty smart and was fairly cute. She could speak multiple foreign languages (bonus!), but then I realized that it may not all be cake and unicorns with her. She was pursuing her doctorate in psychology, which is a warning sign for me. I then realized that she had this whole "Evil Genius" thing working for her. While eating dinner together, when she told me at how she and her ex had a crazy argument and she lit his clothes on fire after he left their house? Yeah, FUCK THAT.

I met another lady (not online) at a wedding reception. As each of us were there by ourselves, I figured no harm in striking up a convo with her. We talked for a good 2 hours, through the Best Man and Maid of Honor toasts. Then, she abruptly left after we danced to a few songs. Only later did I find out that she was engaged.

Another girl I met online and found out she was a stripper, and didn't have anything beyond that date.

Another whom I met online and we started to click on our first date, and then she dropped the fact that she'd be moving to San Francisco in a couple of weeks. You're welcome for the free meal and I'll never see you again.

Keep your collective heads up! And it's ok to laugh about it. I certainly have (through the tears).

[Goatchella]

This is like two monkeys fucking a football.

Not much being accomplished. Haha I'm over here wondering how I end up stuck in relationships and what I can do to stay away from women.

[Mugwog]

Mugwog you shared entirely too much fucking information there.

This is only a tidbit of the life of Mugwog

[romanticizer]

But see, the problem is no men want to talk to me. I go out, I see a ton of girls get hit on and talked to. I get nothing. It's depressing as hell. I don't know what's wrong.

Story of my LIFE.

[Mugwog]

This is like two monkeys fucking a football.

Not much being accomplished. Haha I'm over here wondering how I end up stuck in relationships and what I can do to stay away from women.

The less I say the longer they stay.

Ignoring women has been the most successful dating strategy. Sadly enough.

[mmsk123]

Been on OKC since early last year but didn't try very much until late summer. I usually spend a week or two messaging back and forth instead of asking to meet up immediately. I've found out that I am apparently really good at messaging and getting girls to go on dates - I've gone on about a dozen since September - but as far as getting a second date I am 1 for 12. Being a socially awkward penguin and having zero success in real life this would seem quite good, but after so many failures I can only conclude that:

1. I am much less attractive in real life than I am in my photos
2. I suck at dating
3. Forever alone

The most recent date just made me completely discouraged. She was incredibly beautiful, we were clicking in messages, very similar interests, talked on phone and I had a decent date lined up (first fridays at the museum and dinner after). I personally thought it went ok, but she felt no "spark" and that was it. So I am just stuck and have no idea what I am doing wrong.. but I guess that's how it is.

[Goatchella]

They hate to be ignored...and they will do anything to mean more than money, accomplishments, goals, success, happiness and fun.

[IceyHotshot]

Courtney, thanks for the offer to help with my profile, but I deleted it permanently. Don't plan on making a new one.

[chiapet]

1. I am much less attractive in real life than I am in my photos

I'm really concerned with this, it would be awful/humiliating to wind up on a date with someone who felt duped by your profile picture. I put less flattering ones up and now the messages are coming in less frequently. :P

[romanticizer]

Watch how easy this is.

Mugwog- your sexy as fuck and I like your style. Can we date and see where it goes?

I actually tried this approach recently.
It didn't work.

[SoulDischarge]

My friend is on Plenty Of Fish and convinced me to make a profile on there a couple of months back despite the fact that I knew it would be pointless. My profile header is "Degenerate Wastoid Seeks Sexy Chupacabra" because I'm going to fucking choke if I read one more profile that says "Looking For A Nice Guy." I've only gotten one message in the last couple of months.

[guedita]

It might be more fun to list some of the more excellent OKC usernames. Today I've seen:

loveonlindatin
iheartmarvel
BayBaller4
iheartcspan
OpThomasPrime

[frizzlefry]

The first time I met someone over OKC was awful. Wasn't a date, just hanging out at her dirty house. She wasn't really crazy, her life was just a mess and her ambitions at the time chiefly concerned not taking drugs, I hung out with her that night and basically ignored her afterward, didn't feel too bad as it wasn't really a date. Since than I have met a couple women online and I guess I would call one of them a "success"

[SoulDischarge]

Hey. OpThomasPrime could be promising. Or at least maybe he has the ability to transform into someone interesting in crisis situations.

[Courtney]

Does it say, "My name is Courtney and I am awesome"??? Because it should.

"My name is Courtney and my friends from the internet tell me I'm AWESOME."

[Mugwog]

Oh god the "witty" names people have.


Ok Cupid has this thing with auto names and adding the word taco. So a lot of girls have the word taco in their name.

[Goatchella]

That means frizzle got some.

[Mugwog]

I hung out with her that night and basically ignored her afterward, didn't feel too bad as it wasn't really a date.

Yep, sounds like you got laid

[romanticizer]

Kat, do you look upset/bored/scared in person?
I have found that the biggest thing is smiling and pretending to enjoy yourself/seeming open even if you aren't.

That's all I got.
I'm totally hopeless in relationships - lately.

[chiapet]

Oh god...

I didn't realize apparently IM is turned on by default on OKC... people have been sending me IMs while I've been here complaining about dating sites. Panic.

[SoulDischarge]

"I was JUST talking about how awful you are. Isn't that IRONIC?"

[Goatchella]

You gone get raped**cue image

[Courtney]

Hahaaa. The only people who message me are people who I already know. I think I'm relieved that's the case.

[A-Ron]

I just got onto OKCupid after being on and off with someone for the past couple of years. It seems way more acceptable as a means of meeting someone than it was 5 years ago. I've always been a firm beliver that people really raise their standards (or have a "must be" list)though, and end up not giving folks a shot they would normally give a chance in real life. I tend to fair better in face to face meetings yet just don't have the time as before to make the needed effort when it is appropriate.