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Thread: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

  1. #151
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    I can't believe we're indulging this ridiculous charade. The whore has an obvious case of ear chlamydia. Plain and simple.

  2. #152
    Dick Nicewonger kreutz2112's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Chlameardia
    RAPE STOVE

    white power?!

  3. #153
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Sounds like something somebody somewhere's a baron of.

  4. #154
    Coachella Junkie fatbastard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Sounds like someone needs to be nominated for the board's smallest penis.
    Whiskey Sour

    2 oz blended whiskey
    Juice of 1/2 lemon
    1/2 tsp powdered sugar
    1 cherry
    1/2 slice lemon

    Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.

  5. #155
    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Just saw an ad for Hands Only CPR. Seems to be the cool new kind of CPR.

    Is there any practical reason for Hands Only to be favoured over Mouth to Mouth, or are people just more likely to try performing it in an emergency?

  6. #156
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    And you do it to the rhythm of Stayin' Alive.

  7. #157
    Cult Leader koryp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by MissingPerson View Post
    Just saw an ad for Hands Only CPR. Seems to be the cool new kind of CPR.

    Is there any practical reason for Hands Only to be favoured over Mouth to Mouth, or are people just more likely to try performing it in an emergency?
    Studies showed most people sucked at doing both effectively, so we changed it to just one thing to do at a time. The planned update for 2016 has the first responder just basically standing around until an ambulance arrives. That way everyone can do CPR and feel good about themselves.
    Wow, 12 step meetings at Coachella, who knew? SOBERCHELLA.COM

    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case....

  8. #158

    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by MissingPerson View Post
    Just saw an ad for Hands Only CPR. Seems to be the cool new kind of CPR.

    Is there any practical reason for Hands Only to be favoured over Mouth to Mouth, or are people just more likely to try performing it in an emergency?
    I think people weren't willing to go M2M on a stranger and chances are that they weren't carrying pocket breath masks thingys so the people in charge of these things decided to have first responders concentrate on getting the chest compressions in correctly...

    I made all that up, but it sounds right
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    What if your woman is one of those water-filled bag things with a hole in the middle that is designed to fall out of your hands when you try to pick it up?

  9. #159
    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    It made me curious, so I went looking, and y'all are both right.

    People are more confident about charging in and doing something without the M2M element, and if they aren't trained to do rescue breaths effectively, they're just going to waste time they could be doing compressions.

  10. #160
    Cult Leader koryp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Droppin nursie knowledge.

    I didn't make mine up, I'm an instructor.
    Wow, 12 step meetings at Coachella, who knew? SOBERCHELLA.COM

    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case....

  11. #161
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Why do I wake up with a lot of dried mucus (boogers) in my nose after a night of drinking beer, and specifically after a night of drinking shitty beer?

    8/16: Anthony Naples, Maxmillion Dunbar @ f8
    8/18: Man Man @ The Chapel
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    9/24 - 28: Decibel Festival
    10/5: The War on Drugs, Cass McCombs @ The Fillmore
    10/18-19: Treasure Island Music Festival

  12. #162
    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by koryp View Post
    Droppin nursie knowledge.

    I didn't make mine up, I'm an instructor.
    I figured, I was just curious about it. I had to do a bunch of combat first aid stuff when I was in the army reserve many moons ago, and there was an awful lot of emphasis put on the first breath. We had the benefit of RescusiAndy to learn how to do it right though I guess, whereas the ad campaign is just telling people.

    The ad's brilliant, btw -


  13. #163
    Cult Leader koryp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Beautiful vid, but my fear is "hard and fast" will result in people with chest that feel like you're breaking celery in a bag of jello during compressions.
    Wow, 12 step meetings at Coachella, who knew? SOBERCHELLA.COM

    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case....

  14. #164
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Ha. That's a great video.

    I took a first aid and CPR class at the Red Cross a year or two ago, and they did teach us to alternate chest compressions with mouth to mouth, Baywatch style.

  15. #165
    Coachella Junkie fatbastard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Cosmetic advice or future ear problems?

    My barber stuck his finger in my ear after a haircut last week and twisted his finger up and down laughing. I was like, what? He tells me that hair is starting to grow in my ears.

    Question, is it OK to trim/shave or just leave it alone? If it's trimmed/shaved, will it grow back thicker?
    Whiskey Sour

    2 oz blended whiskey
    Juice of 1/2 lemon
    1/2 tsp powdered sugar
    1 cherry
    1/2 slice lemon

    Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.

  16. #166
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    This sounds like a question for The Gentlemen Thread.

  17. #167
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Fb, trim it or look like an old man. your choice.

    also, your barber's a dick.
    Quote Originally Posted by efrain44 View Post
    Anyone know who the guy in the Cardinals jersey is? I've seen him in pictures on the board and I thought I saw him this year.

  18. #168
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    I had some pork in my fridge that was on the edge of smelling a little funky. So I smothered it in sesame oil, soy sauce, fish sauce, garlic, chile and ginger and cooked it up with some choy sum, sliced rice cake and scallions.

    It occured to me after finishing dinner that there's a reason the human body thinks old meat smells bad. Am I going to die?

  19. #169
    Cult Leader koryp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    We'll let you know in the morning...
    Wow, 12 step meetings at Coachella, who knew? SOBERCHELLA.COM

    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case....

  20. #170

    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by koryp View Post
    Beautiful vid, but my fear is "hard and fast" will result in people with chest that feel like you're breaking celery in a bag of jello during compressions.
    It's not uncommon to break ribs when doing proper compressions.

  21. #171
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    I'd rather have a few broken ribs than be dead.

  22. #172
    Cult Leader koryp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    I don't really care about the patients one way or the other, it just grosses me out every time hear that squishy crunchy sound during a code.
    Wow, 12 step meetings at Coachella, who knew? SOBERCHELLA.COM

    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case....

  23. #173
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    You have to care a little.

  24. #174
    Cult Leader koryp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    You have to care a little.
    not a job requirement
    Wow, 12 step meetings at Coachella, who knew? SOBERCHELLA.COM

    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case....

  25. #175
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    I can imagine you have to eventually be desensitized.

  26. #176
    Cult Leader koryp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    I can imagine you have to eventually be desensitized.
    WINNER! See what you have to look forward to Barb. Good luck at your first position and congrats on joining our hallowed ranks. I'll be rooting for ya.
    Wow, 12 step meetings at Coachella, who knew? SOBERCHELLA.COM

    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case....

  27. #177

    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    People who don't get desensitized do not last long in the field. I used to work with a girl who could remember the names of every patient that she had lost. She's been on stress leave for over a year now.

  28. #178
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    If anything, I would think that a little desensitization would work to your advantage. I mean, if you're dealing with a life-or-death situation, and you're too focused on the OH-SHIT-THIS-PERSON-IS-GOING-TO-CROAK-AND-IT-WILL-BE-MY-FAULT, you're not going to be too distracted and not giving the patient the best care.

  29. #179

    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    Ribs will be cracked. That's why it's important to tell super old people about DNR... So they don't have to try to live with broken ribs at 95 after they come back from a cardiac arrest.

    What do you do, koryp? Are you a nurse too??

    Courtney, you have 7 days to live. It was nice knowing you :'(

    I am a little worried because I am pretty sociable and like to make friends with everybody. I'm sure I'll get used to deaths soon enough.
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    What if your woman is one of those water-filled bag things with a hole in the middle that is designed to fall out of your hands when you try to pick it up?

  30. #180
    Cult Leader koryp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weird rash? Genitals leaking green fluid? Have some Illegitimate Medical Advice!!

    BSN with all that alphebet soup we get over the years. You will get used to deaths Barb. It's just part of the journey of life and can be just as beautiful as birth if prepared for and supported by those present. It can also be horrific and unfair, but 31 flavors and all. What kind of a setting are you starting out in?

    I'm in at least 3 codes a week and ribs maybe get broken once a week around me. Its almost always the result of compressions done too rapidly on the downstroke(not a 50/50 stroke), done over the wrong location, or done too deeply. Still better than no compressions at all.
    Wow, 12 step meetings at Coachella, who knew? SOBERCHELLA.COM

    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case....

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