The 2011 Secret Santa Thread -- ATP Style

[captncrzy]

ATP-Style meaning: I'll be wearing an old man sweater when I dole out the assignments. And scoffing at the lot of you.


This is the annual 2011 Secret Santa thread for whoever wants to participate.

WHAT TO DO:

1) Send an email to: 2012coachella@gmail.com with your FULL NAME AND ADDRESS. I will take on the responsibility of curating your Santa assignment; who you will be assigned to will be based on my mood and how much I like you; you will not know who your Santa is until your gift arrives.

2) Answer the questions below and post them. Your Santa will refer back to your post when he/she is trying to figure out what to get you.

3) Your Santa assignment will be sent to you on NOVEMBER 23 (in time for Black Friday). Once you discover who you are going to be Santa for, just check this thread to see what that person likes. DO NOT POST WHO YOU WILL BE A SANTA FOR.

4) Buy a gift accordingly and ship it NO LATER THAN DECEMBER 15. Gift price maximum is $20. Be creative! See the awesomeness in the 2010 thread. Also: 2009 and 2008. No dildos. This is serious business.

5) Don't be an asshole. If you sign up, don't leave someone hanging.

6) No n00bs. Sorry. If we’re going to be handing out other people’s names and addresses, we sort of need to know you. Some of these ladies around here don’t need another stalker. You must either a) have a post count of 500 b) have a member vouch for you or c) fly to Honolulu and have a Maui Brewing Company Coconut Porter with Courtney.


QUESTIONNAIRE: (Please copy and paste into a post of your own, and answer the questions as best you can).


1) What is your favorite color?

2) What is your T-shirt size?

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?

5) What movies do you like?

6) What eating establishments do you like?

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in

9) What are your sports teams?

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?


Merry Christmas.

[TomAz]

This would be more interesting if assignments were not 'random'. Go all out and curate the assignments with an eye towards mischief.

[captncrzy]

This would be more interesting if assignments were not 'random'. Go all out and curate the assignments with an eye towards mischief.

Oohhhhhh. Genius.

[TomAz]

I can't think of anyone better suited for the job than you.

[captncrzy]

I have been coined the Director of Opinions and Judgments at work. I'm trying to get it to become an official title.

[gaypalmsprings]

I hope you have the previous years' lists so there isn't too much redundancy. For example, I have never been the benefactor of PF's Coachella tix. Hint. Hint.

[gaypalmsprings]

1) What is your favorite color? Purple

2) What is your T-shirt size? XL

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? Unicorns & cats

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? Daft Punk, Robyn, Rufus Wainwright

5) What movies do you like? Wizard of Oz (already have the DVD), anything gay(ish)

6) What eating establishments do you like? Home Town Buffet, McDonalds

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? Chocolate

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in? NASCAR

9) What are your sports teams? Detroit Lions, #24 Jeff Gordon, Northwestern University Wildcats, Wyoming Cowboys

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? This old guy likes surprises, and anything with glitter or sparkle. He looks better in old guy stuff, rather than in speedos or tank tops. Anything gay is good. Even homemade is great - especially if it's got music on it or is edible. Say "hi" to Christmas Carol for me, and enjoy yourself at the North Pole.

[Neighborhood Creep]

1) What is your favorite color? any

2) What is your T-shirt size? large

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? pass

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? any

5) What movies do you like? thrillers

6) What eating establishments do you like? any

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? cheese

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in? disc golf

9) What are your sports teams? MN Twins

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? I appreciate anything

[bmack86]

1) What is your favorite color? I prefer blue

2) What is your T-shirt size? Xl, but I'm getting increasingly into the L range

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? I like cats aight.

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? Sonic Youth, Kurt Vile or The War on Drugs. Let's lean towards the second or third.

5) What movies do you like? Generally, things that you'd assume would be released on Criterion or crazy exploitation/action films.

6) What eating establishments do you like? Umami burger, Tomato pie pizza, good stuff

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? I'm trying to stay the eff away from that stuff

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in? Concerts, skiing, law school

9) What are your sports teams? Dodgers

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? I regularly wear my shirt from last year.

More importantly, I REALLY like records. And here's a list of every record I own. It's searchable, so if you wanted to get me a record, I've made it easy for you!

[chairmenmeow47]

1) What is your favorite color?
RAINBOW or orange. i like colours.

2) What is your T-shirt size?

large in girly sizes, medium in normal men's t-shirts

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?

dinosaur

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?

ben folds/ben folds five, portishead, radiohead, nine inch nails

5) What movies do you like?

tombstone, terminator 2, star wars

6) What eating establishments do you like?

mexican food

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?

please don't ship me food; even in the winter it's hot here during the day i don't anything to melt

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in

group sex, snowboarding, hiking, biking, crafting, getting drunk on tinychat

9) What are your sports teams?

the olympics are cool, but i'm really not into team sports

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?

i'm pretty fucking silly

also, i will be recovering from surgery, so whoever gets me as their santa should know i will either send your gift super early or late.

[westcoastpirate]

1) What is your favorite color? Mint green

2) What is your T-shirt size? Large

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? Red Panda

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? Air

5) What movies do you like? Walk Hard, the Dewey Cox Story, primarily into Dexter and Breaking Bad at the moment

6) What eating establishments do you like? Mexican and Pizza (not mexican pizza)

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? Baked potato chips, chocolate

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in? Riding bikes, concerts, walking, drinking beer!

9) What are your sports teams? Phoenix Suns, Arizona State University, anything soccer

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? I love cheesy shit

[stuporfly]

1) What is your favorite color?
Purple!

2) What is your T-shirt size?
XL (sigh) L soon!

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?
Animals are dicks.

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?
The Blur or the Beach Boys!

5) What movies do you like?
Rock/roll flicks.

6) What eating establishments do you like?
Local Brooklyn fare. The exotic-ier the better.

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?
I'm off that shit.

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in
Cynicism, fart jokes, seeking out obscure sites where historic rock & roll stuff happened wherever I go.

9) What are your sports teams?
Knicks, Yankees, Aston Villa

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?
Beards are itchy.

[JorgeC]

I love doing this, last 2 years have been fun. Thanks for coordinating again.

1) What is your favorite color? - BLUE

2) What is your T-shirt size? - LARGE

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? - DRAGONS, Wolves (as long as they look like Alcide from True Blood)

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? IAMX (buttons would be awesome)

5) What movies do you like? horror movies. 80s slasher pics.

6) What eating establishments do you like? fast food, the one and only Del Taco.

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? Almonds, pecans (no peanuts...not allergic, i just hate them)

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in - concerts, concerts, concerts.

9) What are your sports teams? pass...blah.

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? my safe word is PJ Harvey.

[sbconnection]

I'm definitely shy of the 500 post mark but I feel like i've met a decent amount of you guys to finally be included this year!

1) What is your favorite color? Purple/silver/black

2) What is your T-shirt size? womens medium

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? Narwhals, Mastodons or any animal that has big teeth(not a horse, they freak me the fuck out).

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? Bowie, NIN(even though i probably have everything), Mastodon, DEVO, Dinosaur Jr., The Cure...

5) What movies do you like? Anything Tarintino, Burton, Rodriguez, Or Muppet related

6) What eating establishments do you like? Sushi!!!...and burritos

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? CHOCOLATE MMMMMMNOMNOM

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in? Biking, BAKING!(bakeware is always appriciated), dressing up for just about anything, Concerts-DUH!

What else do you want the Elf Master to know? I could always use a new boa... they have always saved friends in a pinch when it comes to lack of costume ideas. Also, David Bowie + Trent Reznor = SWOON

Also, If there is a quality dildo out there for <$20, by all means send it!(un-used preferably).... Rebelling against the rules, RULES!

[captncrzy]

I can vouch for Sunni

[Sleepingrock]

1) What is your favorite color?
To wear, Black, Green or Blue.

2) What is your T-shirt size?
Medium or a small large to be on the safe side.

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?
I don't think I have any favorites.

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?
Holy Fuck, High Contrast, Max Cooper, Tycho, BoC, Deerhunter to name a couple.

5) What movies do you like?
Witty comedies, movies that make you think, documentaries.

6) What eating establishments do you like?
Vegetarian ones, and foodie ones, local establishments.

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?
Ginger Chews, I stick to the more "natural" side of candy and snacks, I'm picky.

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in
School (Anthropology major) and work, with listening to music tossed in there. I really enjoy hiking and camping in the summer though.

9) What are your sports teams?
I'm not a sports guy, I like hiking and camping.

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?
I think anything that anyone needs to know will be found in one of my posts somewhere.

If you need me to post more info, PM captaincrazy to PM me to get me to be a bit more descriptive.

[Hannahrain]

I'm popping in here briefly to promote the homemade gift exchange over in the DIY and Home Repair thread for anybody who wants to double up. We'd love to have you. If you don't suck.

[citizenerased]

1) What is your favorite color? Navy or Burgundy

2) What is your T-shirt size? Men's Medium

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? That's okay

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? Bright Eyes, Portugal. the Man, Royksopp

5) What movies do you like? Kill Bill, Black Swan, Star Wars

6) What eating establishments do you like? Benihana, In-N-Out

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? i'm over candy

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in Concerts, hiking, x-box, smoking weed

9) What are your sports teams? Real Madrid

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? I dunno

[Boourns]

1) What is your favorite color?
black

2) What is your T-shirt size?
XL or XXL if available

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?
Cryptids and evil overlords of scientology fame

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?
To avoid any duplicates, I will list a few bands I don't really own anything from:
Nisennenmondai (no merch, no music in physical form)
Little Dragon (no merch, own Machine Dreams on vinyl)
Fever Ray (no merch, own Mercy Street)
Bat for Lashes (no merch, most vinyl except for Two Suns and the Let's Get Lost single)
Sigur Ros (no merch)

Detailing which merch I have from Radiohead, Pulp, and Asobi Seksu would be too difficult.

5) What movies do you like?
movies of the fucked up variety.

6) What eating establishments do you like?
any place that has great burgers

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?
cheese, beer

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in
concerts, beer drinking, World of Warcraft, trips of all sorts

9) What are your sports teams?
none

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?
it wasn't me

[Courtney]

c) fly to Honolulu and have a Maui Brewing Company Coconut Porter with Courtney

YES!


1) What is your favorite color? I like them all! Especially if they are in stripe form. I like stripes. And chevrons. And plaid.

2) What is your T-shirt size? Large. But it better be a boat neck or scoop neck style, because I hate wearing crew neck anything.

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? Ummm. I like animals when Kiki Smith draws them.

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? Can I steal Bryan's answer and say Sonic Youth? Also Yo La Tengo. Oh, or Dean & Britta if you want to burn me a copy of their 13 Most Beautiful Songs for Andy Warhol Screen Tests, because I have been meaning to listen to that forever.

5) What movies do you like? Paris Texas, Lost In Translation, The Royal Tenenbaums, Pulp Fiction, The Graduate, Being John Malkovich, Heathers, The Usual Suspects, Almost Famous, The Maltese Falcon, North By Northwest, Memento, Citizen Kane, Roman Holiday, various other obvious and predictable choices.

6) What eating establishments do you like? I like eating places you've never heard of. I like eating places that don't even exist yet. Also, anywhere top-notch chefs are doing their version of local, seasonal, farm-to-table, in the style of Chez Panisse. But mostly locally I eat at Downtown at HiSAM/Town, and my kitchen.

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? I'm trying to be healthy, so right now that includes lots of fresh veggies, nuts, beans, and whole grains. But if you wanted to send me something edible, some sort of regional healthy food from your city would be cool. And I really like unusual spices and tea in pretty packaging. No candy.

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in? Competitive internet-surfing. Also sometimes reading magazines of the fashion and lifestyle variety, swimming (with about a pound of SPF 60 on me), hiking in the dark before sunrise so I can reach the peak as the sun is coming up and feel badass, icing my sore muscles and spending a lot of time in my gym's sauna and hot tub after aforementioned swimming and hiking, going to art museums and making snarky remarks about what the docent tours get wrong, dancing so so so poorly (preferably after drinking too much), popping blisters on my feet from the heels I wear for aforementioned dancing, swooning over Ira Glass from This American Life on NPR, sending/receiving handwritten letters, driving out into barren landscapes in the middle of nowhere to visit obscure earth art, lusting after well-designed foreign and niche office supplies (like this and this and this), revising this post until it becomes a full-on multi-page essay, and did I mention the internet?

9) What are your sports teams? I don't really watch sports unless it involves someone taking me on a date with the prospect of really good nookie afterwards, in which case I will occasionally make an exception.

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? Mail to Hawaii takes a fuckload of time, so please use USPS Priority Mail if you don't want it to be on a boat for six weeks.

[Miroir Noir]

1) What is your favorite color? Black, grey, and white. And I have been told by my girlfriend that I already have entirely too much of all three in my wardrobe. So, anything colorful.

2) What is your T-shirt size? I'm in a weird purgatory between men's medium and large. If it runs tight like a UK shirt or American Appy, I'm a large. Otherwise, medium usually works.

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? I like clever animals with cute people-like hands. If I go to the zoo, I like watching the animals that build things, cause mischief, play, etc. That said, I can't imagine wanting something with, say, a rock chuck on it.

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? I've been on a big Husker Du kick lately. '80s college rock is my favorite "era" or "genre." I'm not a vinyl collector though; simply don't have the room for it.

5) What movies do you like? Almost all of my favorite films are '60s European art house classics, or '70s New Hollywood films. Bergman is my favorite filmmaker. Godfather and Godfather, Part II (with a slight preference for Part II), are probably my favorites movies. I like all of the contemporary stuff most people would probably expect (P.T. Anderson, Wong, Charlie Kaufman, Sofia Coppola, etc.) But I can also enjoy a mindless comedy or action film; I enjoy trash as much as art sometimes. That said, I already own way too many DVDs and Blu-rays for my own good.

6) What eating establishments do you like? I love trying new local restaurants. Total sucker for pizza and carb-heavy comfort food.

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? a) Dark chocolate. b) Cookies. c) Combinations of a) and b).

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in? Music, film, politics, reading and debating about each the foregoing. Literature, when I have the time. Dining and wine. Hiking. Visiting National Parks. Drinking like Don Draper.

9) What are your sports teams? New York Yankees, Notre Dame football. I get enough grief for those two that I don't really need to pick any more up. Also, the Utah Jazz when they are relevant/playing.

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? I am the most Christmas-loving atheist you will ever meet.

[Pixiessp]

1) What is your favorite color?
Olive Green, Black.

2) What is your T-shirt size?
Small to Medium(girl sizes)

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?
Monkeys( for t-shirt purposes)

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?
Antlers, Austra, Portishead, This Mortal Coil, Xmal Deutschland.


5) What movies do you like?
To Kill a Mockingbird, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo Trilogy, Kill Bill, Secrets and Lies. (For t-shirt purposes)

6) What eating establishments do you like?
I rarely go out to eat but BJ's tends to draw me in from time to time.

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?
Paydays

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in
Bike riding, occasional hike.

9) What are your sports teams?
North Carolina Tarheels, UCSB Gauchos, San Antonio Spurs

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?
I love books and discovering new music(duh)

[gaypalmsprings]

I rarely go out to eat but BJ's tends to draw me in from time to time.

This kind of surprises me, considering...

[Pixiessp]

I walked right into that one, didn't I.

[koryp]

1) What is your favorite color?
Deep blues still do it for me.

2) What is your T-shirt size?
Medium

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?
The insides and outsides of humans keep me entertained. Otherwise no animals.

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?
I'm pretty open to anything.

5) What movies do you like?
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Resevoir Dogs
Where the day takes you

6) What eating establishments do you like?
Any place with a truely exceptional cup of coffee.

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?
Gummy worms/Sour worms

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in
Playing and listening to music.

9) What are your sports teams?
No teams, but I'm a regular at MMA events.

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?
The answer is 42.

[Aurgasm]

No Dildos?


Boring...

and i really suck. I SUCK.

[guedita]

1) What is your favorite color? Blue and Green.

2) What is your T-shirt size? Medium.

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)? My favorite animals are my cats. Not just "cats" in the abstract. MY CATS. But I wouldn't mind an article of clothing that had a giraffe, dolphin, or hippopotamus on it.

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose? The Apples in Stereo, Deerhunter, Something Untzy

5) What movies do you like? How To Train Your Dragon

6) What eating establishments do you like? Farmers Markets

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like? Kale Chips, Dried Apricots, SHARKIES.

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in? Internet Bullying, Recreational Sedatives, Couch Lounging, Apple-Coring

9) What are your sports teams? No.

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know? I have a small, hand crafted stone turtle named Abraham Curry that would like a friend to look out over the small waterway that runs past my back porch with him.

[fiopadp7791]

1) What is your favorite color?
Don't really have one... so if this leaves me open for some obnoxious hot pink item, I say "neato"

2) What is your T-shirt size?
medium or large... either work. Play it safe and go large, because shrinkage sucks

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?
I kinda like horse racing... otherwise I'm a sucker for dogs too.

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?
I don't own an Ipod. I still buy CDs. It's a little late, but I've been meaning to buy "Conditions" from Temper Trap only since that damn thing was released 2 or 3 years ago. Otherwise I wouldn't mind a CD of some really good artist of any genre that you like, but don't think is really well known (any genre)...

5) What movies do you like?
I'm so bad... I barely watch them.

6) What eating establishments do you like?
Green Mill, Famous Dave's, Broadway Pizza (MN)

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?
Nuts, Mixed Nuts, Cashews

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in
Music, Sports, Drinking PBR, Eating Drumsticks (the ice cream kind), playing with my pooches.

9) What are your sports teams?
Twins, Vikings, Gophers, T-Wolves

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?
I wouldn't mind a really cheap light-colored hat... baseball style, can be ugly, clearance rack-esque, something that will cover my buzzed head in the hot desert sun come April.

[unknown]

1) What is your favorite color?
I'm not picky - grey, blue, green, tan - as long as whatever it is looks nice

2) What is your T-shirt size?
women - med or lg, men - small

3) What is your favorite animal (if you want something with an animal on it)?
Elephant (Ganesh in particular), Peacock, or a Plastikman

4) If you would like to receive band merchandise, which band would you choose?
Apparat (has new shirts out), Flying Lotus (has a pretty rad shirt out too), Radiohead

5) What movies do you like?
Tree of Life, Eternal Sunshine, Life Aquatic, Royal Tenenbaums, Fantastic Mr. Fox

6) What eating establishments do you like?
I love cooking so Whole Foods (if going a gift card for food route)

7) What kinds of candy/snack foods do you like?
snickers, flaming hot doritos (rare if they even exist still)

8) What sorts of activities do you engage in?
I like making jewelry (chunky beaded things), creating stencils, painting, photography, cooking, wine and beer drinking (really love cabs and ipa's)

9) What are your sports teams?
San Diego Super Chargers. Although not so super these days.

10) What else do you want the Elf Master to know?
Please feel free to include a disc of mp3's you consider to be awesome. I love listening to new music.

[Mugwog]

No dildos. This is serious business.

How many times has this occurred in the past? I mean it must have considering this is a rule