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Thread: The Sex thread

  1. #2191
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    I don't know. He has tinnitus and is not into going to concerts right now. I took him to see the Psychedelic Furs last summer, he forgot his ear plugs, and he was miserable for weeks afterward and had trouble sleeping because of the tinnitus. He really enjoyed the show otherwise though. Coachella would be pretty rough for him.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  2. #2192
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    I didn't jam it in. But I don't want to be too descriptive because everyone would be too grossed out. I said it was easy.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  3. #2193
    Coachella Junkie Neighborhood Creep's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Did you fist pump while your arm was in there?
    Quote Originally Posted by theklein25 View Post
    When Foster the People played Pumped Up Kicks I freaked the fuck out because I thought that song was long gone

  4. #2194
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    amyzzz: sex thread sheriff
    If she's anything like Arpaio, we're all fucked.

    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    I have to choose?
    Quite a few people sent a flurry of texts my way yesterday after they egged her on in here. Amy doesn't seem to get that some people that are asking her questions about it are doing it to get her to spill her guts for game.
    Here's what you don't seem to get. It's not what you do (or did). Most people have done some weird ass shit. I'm not bad at sex; I get that people have fetishes and whatnot. It's that you don't seem to have any real concept of actions and consequences--not just with stuff here, but other shit that you have going on in your own life. Don't constantly bloviate about your 'boyfriend' and your bedroom practices in a public forum and then bitch when it comes back around to you.
    You must realize that these people aren't random strangers on the internet. These are people that you are going to have to shake hands with (or not, as it were) in April.
    Ahh, looking back, I guess I could see where choosing might be a hardship... But, would you at least let me know when she's gaining and coming up from behind? You know, the whole "dog thing" and all...

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Not sure why you're putting boyfriend in quotes. Sorry that I like to talk about this stuff. I don't care to shake hands with people anyway. Everyone knows how awkward I am. And I always wash my hands anyway. I don't see why you feel the need to make me feel bad about it.
    Amyzzz, my intentions are not to make you feel bad about your new found chocolate craving... I just don't understand why my mentioning the joys of a vibrator a few years ago got you all beside yourself enough to subsequently remind everyone how disgusting my posts are, while you go on about your Willy Wonka escapades.

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    I didn't jam it in. But I don't want to be too descriptive because everyone would be too grossed out. I said it was easy.
    Would you tell us more if the In and Out Burger theme song were playing in the background?
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  5. #2195
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by VigoTheCarpathian View Post
    Amy, now that you've jammed your fist into a man's asshole, do you see BROKENDOLL in a different light? Will you talk shop and be bff? That would be sweet.
    Are you suggesting that I am the light at the end of the tunnel that people look for in life?
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  6. #2196
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    I can't help but feel compelled to loan Amyzzz my avatar while she explores her boyfriend's nooks and crannies... that's the kind of BFF I'd be for her, you know.
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  7. #2197
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    I didn't jam it in. But I don't want to be too descriptive because everyone would be too grossed out. I said it was easy.
    Speaking of jamming it...


    "Easy"

    Know it sounds kinky
    But I just can't stand the pain
    Babe,I'm fisting you tomorrow
    Seems to me
    You know I've done all I can
    You see I begged, oiled
    until hollowed....

    Ooh, that's why it's easy
    it's easy even without warning
    That's why it's easy
    It's easy, at least it was the other morning....




    I'm sorry... I'll try to make this the last bit of stupid for the day...
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  8. #2198
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Fuckers, you realize that by leaving me in this thread all by myself, my mind starts to assume that you're all off somewhere fist pumping as a team without me, right?
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  9. #2199
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Woo, thanks for clearing capn out of the thread, Beverly.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  10. #2200
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Woo, thanks for clearing capn out of the thread, Beverly.
    Ah, don't kid yourself, Amyzzz... The Stage Manager is surely off side with her trusty clapboard, just waiting to yell, "Cut!"
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  11. #2201
    VigoTheCarpathian
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by BROKENDOLL View Post
    Are you suggesting that I am the light at the end of the tunnel that people look for in life?
    Of course not thats crazy. Im saying maybe you can invite her to the meetings. Introduce her to the card-carrying members. Give her the free buggery and tour.

  12. #2202
    Endearingly Dislikable RotationSlimWang's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    The sensation for the receiver is about the same, and it protects the giver from bacteria.
    This is insanely dumb. How would the sensation for the receiver be the same? Do you have tongue-textured Saran wrap?

  13. #2203
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Cut
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

  14. #2204
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    Cut
    LOL "Cut," as in, "That's a wrap?" Because that's what we're debating about here on the set of Amyzzz XXX Maiden Voyage Down the Hershey Highway.
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  15. #2205
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    She just enjoys being a bully and talking shit behind other people's backs is all. Small people like to kick a dog when it's down.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  16. #2206
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    I'm certainly not the only one talking about you behind your back. I am, however, the only one that has tried to publicly give you some advice...first subtly and now, directly. Take it or not, I don't care. At least I made an attempt.


    I'm sure this is about your removal from the social group, so know that if you insist on being irritating, there are other social groups you can do it in. And I am sure you will be doing plenty of shit talking about me in them so, *shrug*
    Last edited by captncrzy; 10-27-2013 at 09:19 PM. Reason: Spelling
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

  17. #2207
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    She just enjoys being a bully and talking shit behind other people's backs is all. Small people like to kick a dog when it's down.
    What pisses you off more, Amyzzz?...People bullying other people, or people bullying dogs?
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  18. #2208
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    I'm certainly not the only one talking about you behind your back. I am, however, the only one that has tried to publicly give you some advice...first subtly and now, not so subtly. If you insist on being irritating, there are other social groups you can do it in.

    And I am sure you will be doing plenty of shit talking about me in them so, glass houses.
    Well, allrighty! Let's take a 15 minute break while our Stage Manager tries taming the Anal Diva. It appears as if they're trying to decide who should take control of the PR work on this project.

    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  19. #2209
    Coachella Junkie stinkbutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Small people like to kick a dog when it's down.
    No one??
    Quote Originally Posted by roboto View Post
    And stinkbutt leaving a motorhead set when you know he's dying just to talk shit ? Your a shitty person as well .please let mja give you an anal love disease .

  20. #2210
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    See?
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

  21. #2211

    Default Re: The Sex thread

    After hours of pain staking labour, Ive deduced that this is a great time for a new poster to hold his tongue.
    Certain songs they get so scratched into our souls

  22. #2212
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RotationSlimWang View Post
    This is insanely dumb. How would the sensation for the receiver be the same? Do you have tongue-textured Saran wrap?
    I said about the same. It's better than eating shit and the receiver is still pleased. Is that better for you?

  23. #2213
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    And to certain people, I would actually talk about sex and have talked about it.
    Did we talk about it? That is quite a blurry weekend for me.

  24. #2214
    Coachella Junkie stinkbutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Why do you care that amy overshares and people are snickering behind her back? It is no different than last year or the year before. Just like it is no different for me or you. I have met and spent time with enough boardies to know you guys LOVE to be catty about each other. If you have hung out with these people and think you are some sort of exception, you are fucking delusional. People IRL do this all the time, so why should here be any different? Is amy oversharing and being annoying? Sure, but I don't remember the last time you did anything to contribute lulz to the board.

    Cue the social group (aka the shit talking lounge) turn into a feeding frenzy about me
    Quote Originally Posted by roboto View Post
    And stinkbutt leaving a motorhead set when you know he's dying just to talk shit ? Your a shitty person as well .please let mja give you an anal love disease .

  25. #2215
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    I don't care. I'm all about over sharing in this thread.

  26. #2216
    Coachella Junkie stinkbutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    That obviously wasn't directed at you, dumbass
    Quote Originally Posted by roboto View Post
    And stinkbutt leaving a motorhead set when you know he's dying just to talk shit ? Your a shitty person as well .please let mja give you an anal love disease .

  27. #2217
    Coachella Junkie Drinkey McDrinkerstein's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    It completely bizarre to me that you wouldn't want to know that someone you know has had their hand inside a totally insane man's asshole. It's totally fascinating.
    last.fm
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    9/18/14 Neutral Milk Hotel - Hollywood Bowl

  28. #2218
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Quote Originally Posted by stinkbutt View Post
    That obviously wasn't directed at you, dumbass
    Didn't mean I couldn't answer, asshole.

  29. #2219
    Coachella Junkie stinkbutt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    It completely bizarre to me that you wouldn't want to know that someone you know has had their hand inside a totally insane man's asshole. It's totally fascinating.
    See?
    Quote Originally Posted by roboto View Post
    And stinkbutt leaving a motorhead set when you know he's dying just to talk shit ? Your a shitty person as well .please let mja give you an anal love disease .

  30. #2220
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Sex thread

    Dude, don't think for a second that I don't know that you people talk shit about me. As for why I care about all this..
    .fuck if I know. Maybe I just don't like to see people in real not-so-great situations make things worse for themselves.

    Whatever. I won't pop in here anymore and make any, however backhanded and clumsy it was, attempt to sort of help.
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

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