Anxiety, Depression, Medication, Mental Health

[TomAz]

I was joking, Mr. Serious.

[psychic friend]

i had a panic attack once. it was a horrid experience, especially when you don't know that's what's happening. Never had one since. Had the start of one once but talked myself out of it. I never want to go through that again.

[Yablonowitz]

Same for me, Yablo.

I tried CBT a couple of years ago and it worked really well for me. Mostly though I just learned what triggered my anxiety and how to avoid it or be able to predict it or come to terms with it. It happens a lot less frequently now, although it's still a huge part of my everyday life.

What do you make of that article from your friend you sent? To be honest, I found it kind of unsettling because I've been on ze paxil for 7 years now and the idea that I've caused permanent "imbalance" in my serotonin system is not very assuring. I'm not certain he's right about that, though. I could be misreading him. Also, he made a comment that after a while, everyone on an SSRI will start going through withdrawls even if they haven't gone off it...I don't think that's true either, at least I've never heard that. Do you know him personally pretty well? I think he might unintentionally be causing a lot of anxiety in people who read that...unless he's right.

[amyzzz]

This thread makes me nervous and depressed all at once.

[J~$$$]

MDMA.

[amyzzz]

MDMA started up my mood swings again after 10 years of not having them. yay mood swings.

[Monko]

MDMA started up my mood swings again after 10 years of not having them. yay mood swings.

MDMA is tricky. A fulfilling, well directed experience can set you down the road to recovering from depression or anxiety. For me it did just that, once I finally experienced a feeling of total control, and being completely at peace with myself, I set myself on a quest to feel those feelings again without the use of MDMA.

I say its tricky because although I believe it to set me down the right path, it might have broken my legs, so I couldn't travel down that path until they were healed.

[snowgirl_69]

I'd rather have anxiety than go through all that shit mythos described.

Also, all this talk of CBT should go on the "deviant sexual practices" thread. Sickos.

What are you talking about Tom?!?

[TomAz]

this thread here is what I am talking about.

[full on idle]

And that month was March 2007?

ka-ZAM

[NeverMyopic]

Nevermyopic - love the signature. I like Metric. Not sure if I've ever said that before.

Not to me. But I like Metric a lot.

But, I did want to tell you the thread is really cool. It is pretty different from most I've seen on here. A somewhat touchy and personal topic. It takes a lot of courage (I can't articulate it any other way) to just kind of come out and talk about it and ask the question to others..

We are all different and handle things different ways. Some people mentioned they don't like meds or they do other activities to relieve their syndromes; I am happy for them, but others may need the meds (go Placebo). I exercise almost everyday (play basketball, run a couple miles, lift some weights - used to surf), but I guess I still needed something during the "down times".

Anyway, good luck to all, and let's hope we can all work through our "items" in the best way we see fit.

[Encaitare]

I want to thank you for starting this thread Yablo. Word for speaking your mind, however pained it may be. We're all strangers, but we have some things in common...

I so don't feel comfortable discussing my mental instability with people I don't know.

I can understand that mentality, but it can be the complete other way for some people too... There is such a stigma with mental illness that some issues just can't be brought up unless with close friends, and even then we are lucky if they can be supportive and understand. Sometimes it takes the unthreatening ear/screen of a stranger, someone you know won't tell your boss or your friends.

Freshmen year of High School, I remember the relief of understanding and friendship, love. Someone to hold my hand and take me to the morning blood tests, the after school psychiatrist visits, to reassure me that I was normal. But I remember even more the phone call later that year from his mother, telling me to stay away from her son and her family, how she knew about "people like me" - that is, people with bi-polar disorder. I remember her spitting the words out at me like I was some leper on a rampage. She, like so many other people, had some preconceived notion of manic-depression as some liscence to kill, some untreatable, unreliable devil of a disease that would sneak up on her family in the night and destroy them. And in many ways it is some unreliable devil, but only in the torment it causes in the minds of its victims.

Since then, I don't really talk about my problems. I've gone through countless treatments over the past 8 years. Paxil, Wellbutrin, Neurontin, Lithium, Lexapro, Topamax, Xanax, various combinations thereof; all are the names of battles either lost or ongoing, and all have left either phsyical or emotional scars. It gets to the point where you begin to wonder if the side effects are worth the benefits, so you try to titrate down and then the withdrawls draw you back in. Or you fight through them and then your back to the illness, the ups and downs, the panick attacks, until you're on the verge of suicide and the meds are the only extending hand to safety. A vicious cycle.

But you know what? There are good days. There are days when I look back and realize Fuck that guy. I graduated with honors, am pursing my dreams, and am going to Coachella. Again.

[jackstraw94086]

[amyzzz]

I want to thank you for starting this thread Yablo. Word for speaking your mind, however pained it may be. We're all strangers, but we have some things in common...



I can understand that mentality, but it can be the complete other way for some people too... There is such a stigma with mental illness that some issues just can't be brought up unless with close friends, and even then we are lucky if they can be supportive and understand. Sometimes it takes the unthreatening ear/screen of a stranger, someone you know won't tell your boss or your friends.

Freshmen year of High School, I remember the relief of understanding and friendship, love. Someone to hold my hand and take me to the morning blood tests, the after school psychiatrist visits, to reassure me that I was normal. But I remember even more the phone call later that year from his mother, telling me to stay away from her son and her family, how she knew about "people like me" - that is, people with bi-polar disorder. I remember her spitting the words out at me like I was some leper on a rampage. She, like so many other people, had some preconceived notion of manic-depression as some liscence to kill, some untreatable, unreliable devil of a disease that would sneak up on her family in the night and destroy them. And in many ways it is some unreliable devil, but only in the torment it causes in the minds of its victims.

Since then, I don't really talk about my problems. I've gone through countless treatments over the past 8 years. Paxil, Wellbutrin, Neurontin, Lithium, Lexapro, Topamax, Xanax, various combinations thereof; all are the names of battles either lost or ongoing, and all have left either phsyical or emotional scars. It gets to the point where you begin to wonder if the side effects are worth the benefits, so you try to titrate down and then the withdrawls draw you back in. Or you fight through them and then your back to the illness, the ups and downs, the panick attacks, until you're on the verge of suicide and the meds are the only extending hand to safety. A vicious cycle.

But you know what? There are good days. There are days when I look back and realize Fuck that guy. I graduated with honors, am pursing my dreams, and am going to Coachella. Again.

Good for you, Encaitare. I went through a lot of shit in high school like that. It seems like once I got a secure job and a family, I haven't had as many emotional problems. I'm not sure why that is. Bipolar disorder is definitely a genetic thing: I know my mom has it, and she's pretty sure her mom had it. I just hope I don't have it as bad as my mom does when I get to be her age because she has CRAZY mood swings. One benefit for my mom though is it makes her a great telemarketer salesperson, but then she'll go impulse buying and spend way too much money. I haven't had long-term debilitating depression in a long, long time, and I hope to God I don't have it again.

[Yablonowitz]

Manic depression is a highly genetic condition and is most definitely a chemical imbalance that requires treatment. It's in our family - my aunt had it. Luckily, I don't. It's also likely that if you haven't started showing symptoms of it by your 30's, you likely won't get it.

[jackstraw94086]

[TomAz]

[Yablonowitz]

Steamroller!

[Encaitare]

amyzzz- yeah, high school is a bitch anyways, it seems like everyone is bipolar with their damn drama and hormones. Throw in a mood disorder and you can get the worst years of your life. I know I got it from my estranged father's side : schizophrenia, dementia, bipolar, you name it, it's rampant on that side. Unfortunatly, my mother has always been in denial of my condition, insists I was just a normal moody teen who grew up to be an emotional woman, despite the continual diagnosis from the 10+ psychiatric professionals I've seen over the years. It's funny, because she's an RN that works in a state run Mental Institute for the Criminally Insane. I guess she's just afraid.

Don't worry about turning out like your mom though, I bet you'll be better able to regulate yourself just by the fact that you're worrying about it already, and you've seen how it has effected a loved one.

[amyzzz]

amyzzz- yeah, high school is a bitch anyways, it seems like everyone is bipolar with their damn drama and hormones. Throw in a mood disorder and you can get the worst years of your life. I know I got it from my estranged father's side : schizophrenia, dementia, bipolar, you name it, it's rampant on that side. Unfortunatly, my mother has always been in denial of my condition, insists I was just a normal moody teen who grew up to be an emotional woman, despite the continual diagnosis from the 10+ psychiatric professionals I've seen over the years. It's funny, because she's an RN that works in a state run Mental Institute for the Criminally Insane. I guess she's just afraid.

Don't worry about turning out like your mom though, I bet you'll be better able to regulate yourself just by the fact that you're worrying about it already, and you've seen how it has effected a loved one.

My mom didn't know she had it until I got diagnosed at age 16. Then she was like "THAT'S what's wrong with me!" It was kind of a relief to her to know there was a name for it.

[bassmintpdx]

I'm not aware of any side effects. It works well for me, I just feel generally more relaxed and less angry. Of course, it does the exact same thing Paxil does, increase serotonin and therefore has the same negative effects which caused me to subject myself to the electrical brain shocks of Paxil withdrawal - namely, being a fucking zombie. I try to keep the dose low and stagger it, it seems more effective during initial use than as a prolonged supplement. So I go on and off it. I'm pretty sure extended periods of MDMA use caused a lot of my problems, so 5HTP is perfect.

Whoa I didn't know you use that. I have 5HTP and St. John's Wort also. Good analysis of it.

[bassmintpdx]

It's been said that depressed people usually have depressing lives. I think that's fairly true. If you have a really full life and a lot to look forward to, then what do you have to be depressed about?

That said though I think family issues as well as genetics have their role. I've read that a person's mother can have a lot to do with it. I've also read though that a genetic tendency is just that though, a tendency. So you just have to work a little harder to keep yourself up basically and not fall into that tendency.

[PARTY]

Hi, I went to Coachella this year and it was really fun MY Name Is James Ibach
and I Have the Following Itiems missing from:
1. Blue Bag
2.shoulder Strap Gym Bag [Everest]
3.Bathing Ape Hoody
4.Girl Pants
5.american Apperal V neck Shirt
6.Bdg Pants
7.2 waters [ side zipper ]
8.2 granola bars
9.A key And a Lock
10.A Phone Charger
11.a Verizon Phone With Leather Cover
12. A Andy Wharhol Wallet
13.Contants In The Wallet:
A. DisneyLand Passport
B.Kaiser Card
C.BOA Credit Card
D.Social Security Card
E.California Licence
F.24 Hour Fitness Sport Membership

P.S.
EMAIL ME @ Lesgeorgesleningrad@msn.com
Or Call (909) 887-8290

6109 Lori Lane
San Bernardino, Ca
92407

[Vericuester]

And 5HTP is genuinely effective. St. John's Wort never made me feel any different - I've never taken prescription drugs, so I can't comment on most of this, but I noticed a really big change in my personality after I quit smoking pot a lot. I was happier and more at ease. That's kind of "duh" - but for a long time I convinced myself it was the only thing that could make me happy.

I was just going to post on St. John's Wort! Wikipedia says it's only effective for people with mild to moderately severe depression. It doesn't do shit for me, but that's just me. It might work for other people. Someone talked about self-medication...I don't think that's the best thing. lol, things like pot can just agitate other mental disorders, like if one has schizophrenia. If you start self-medicating in high school, like me, you can become an addict too, which sucks.

Anyway, great discussion, people. It's great people are talking about this.

[Yablonowitz]

Hi, I went to Coachella this year and it was really fun MY Name Is James Ibach
and I Have the Following Itiems missing from:
1. Blue Bag
2.shoulder Strap Gym Bag [Everest]
3.Bathing Ape Hoody
4.Girl Pants
5.american Apperal V neck Shirt
6.Bdg Pants
7.2 waters [ side zipper ]
8.2 granola bars
9.A key And a Lock
10.A Phone Charger
11.a Verizon Phone With Leather Cover
12. A Andy Wharhol Wallet
13.Contants In The Wallet:
A. DisneyLand Passport
B.Kaiser Card
C.BOA Credit Card
D.Social Security Card
E.California Licence
F.24 Hour Fitness Sport Membership

P.S.
EMAIL ME @ Lesgeorgesleningrad@msn.com
Or Call (909) 887-8290

6109 Lori Lane
San Bernardino, Ca
92407

What kind of anxiety are you experiencing related to this?

[mob roulette]

he's posting it in every thread. monkey.

[Yablonowitz]

he's posting it in every thread. monkey.

I didn't see you at the fest. Monkey.

[HowToDisappear]

Yablo, I understand you are an honest-to-God internet celebrity.
Someone recognized you on the plane coming over to CA?

[Yablonowitz]

Yablo, I understand you are an honest-to-God internet celebrity.
Someone recognized you on the plane coming over to CA?

Yeah! Invisible Robots! It was hilarious. He's good shit, very nice guy.

I wish I could have met the Atom Family!

[HowToDisappear]

The Atom Family wishes they could've met you, too! You'll have to settle for just the parental half next year. The girls will be at school in MA for the next four years at Coachella time.