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Thread: The Office Space Thread

  1. #1681
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    hahaha
    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    i fucking hate women with their lives together who try and help other people. where are the needy bitches at?!

  2. #1682
    Coachella Junkie Drinkey McDrinkerstein's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    God fucking dammit, hahahaha
    last.fm
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    Quote Originally Posted by getbetter View Post
    Comments about she left the movie feeling bad and she one of those girls that fuck in the ass to saving her Vagina intercourse for marriage.

  3. #1683
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Oops. I just got a tad bit lippy to some caller who wouldn't tell me who he was but was trying to get in contact with 3 of our company execs and didn't like that none of them answered their phone. (None of them are even in their office).

    "I know ____ has a secretary or admin, can I talk to her?"'

    "No, ____ doesn't have a secretary. There are women that work in his department, though."

    4/17: The Afghan Whigs @ Slim's
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  4. #1684
    old school Robin's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Fired.

  5. #1685
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    I'll pack my things.

    4/17: The Afghan Whigs @ Slim's
    4/17: Minilogue @ Mighty
    4/21: The Men @ Rickshaw Stop
    4/26: Simian Mobile Disco, Earth @ Pappy and Harriet's
    5/2-5/4: Austin Psych Fest @ Carson Creek Ranch
    5/10: Joey Anderson @ TBA
    5/17: Kishi Bashi @ GAMH
    5/17: Move D b2b Optimo, Jackmaster, J.Phlip @ PW
    5/21: Baths @ The Independent
    5/30: The Decemberists @ The Crystal Ballroom

  6. #1686
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    today i was over an hour late, paid all my bills online since it's payday, took an hour and a half lunch with the crew that's here today, did some homework, and am now requested by my VP at a brewery in 7 minutes. i love my life.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  7. #1687

    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    today i was over an hour late, paid all my bills online since it's payday, took an hour and a half lunch with the crew that's here today, did some homework, and am now requested by my VP at a brewery in 7 minutes. i love my life.
    I hate you.

  8. #1688
    Banned marooko's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    This was my office today.



    This was my view.


    Last edited by marooko; 10-19-2013 at 08:10 AM.
    Originally Posted by Riggins33
    Why don't you show me a pic of what you look like and I'll send you a pick of myself. I'm 6'5 230....
    Quote Originally Posted by PotVsKtl View Post
    Would you care to list the fixes I've proposed?
    Quote Originally Posted by Dogvolta View Post
    Thank god I did't suck that guy's dick.

  9. #1689
    Coachella Junkie PlayaDelWes's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    I just scheduled a 5:30 A.M. meeting with my employee tomorrow.*

    *after the little **** scheduled one with me at 6:00 A.M.
    Friday: Aloe Blacc, ZZ Ward, Caravan Palace, MS MR, Bastille, OutKast, Grouplove, Kate Nash, HAIM, Jagwar Ma, Tom Odell, Neko Case
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  10. #1690
    Banned marooko's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    that'll shown 'em.
    Originally Posted by Riggins33
    Why don't you show me a pic of what you look like and I'll send you a pick of myself. I'm 6'5 230....
    Quote Originally Posted by PotVsKtl View Post
    Would you care to list the fixes I've proposed?
    Quote Originally Posted by Dogvolta View Post
    Thank god I did't suck that guy's dick.

  11. #1691
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by PlayaDelWes View Post
    I just scheduled a 5:30 A.M. meeting with my employee tomorrow.*

    *after the little **** scheduled one with me at 6:00 A.M.
    little lamb?

    also, why do you allow other people to schedule things for you?
    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    HAY CAN SOMEONE DRIVE DOWN TO THE FESTIVAL GROUNDS AND SEE IF THE BEER BARN IS REALLY A BARN?

  12. #1692
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    I just gleefully stole a coffee cup from the galley.
    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    I think the safest course is to assume everyone is a fucking nightmare and proceed from there.
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.

  13. #1693
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    pics or it didn't happen
    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    HAY CAN SOMEONE DRIVE DOWN TO THE FESTIVAL GROUNDS AND SEE IF THE BEER BARN IS REALLY A BARN?

  14. #1694
    old school JorgeC's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Apparently caused an officewide panic in Canada when I was given an overview from a guy and I had to tell him that we were looking to "gain efficiencies" by combining what he does, with what my office does. Oops.

    Could be that i'll be out of a job after this project too (in like 3 years), but I guess i'm always looking for what's next. I thought people in Canada were chill Marlo, what's up??
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Which healthcare provider will euthanize you the fastest as a service to society?
    Coachella W2 - 4/25 Dillinger Escape Plan@Glass House - 5/1 The Horrors@First Unitarian Church - 5/9 Big Freedia@Echoplex - 6/28 Robyn/Royksopp@Bill Graham

  15. #1695
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by JorgeC View Post
    Apparently caused an officewide panic in Canada when I was given an overview from a guy and I had to tell him that we were looking to "gain efficiencies" by combining what he does, with what my office does. Oops.

    Could be that i'll be out of a job after this project too (in like 3 years), but I guess i'm always looking for what's next. I thought people in Canada were chill Marlo, what's up??
    Without the exact details it would be hard to determine what exactly caused the panic but in my experience anytime you try to merge or combine processes or systems it can be complicated. Plus people are pretty territorial when it comes to their systems and processes and are generally resistant to change. Perhaps a detailed change management plan might soothe some of their concerns.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  16. #1696
    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    pics or it didn't happen
    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    I think the safest course is to assume everyone is a fucking nightmare and proceed from there.
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.

  17. #1697
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    that's about as gleeful as I've ever seen you! I'm sold.
    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    HAY CAN SOMEONE DRIVE DOWN TO THE FESTIVAL GROUNDS AND SEE IF THE BEER BARN IS REALLY A BARN?

  18. #1698
    Banned marooko's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    That's a pretty nice picture, capn.
    Originally Posted by Riggins33
    Why don't you show me a pic of what you look like and I'll send you a pick of myself. I'm 6'5 230....
    Quote Originally Posted by PotVsKtl View Post
    Would you care to list the fixes I've proposed?
    Quote Originally Posted by Dogvolta View Post
    Thank god I did't suck that guy's dick.

  19. #1699
    old school JorgeC's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    Without the exact details it would be hard to determine what exactly caused the panic but in my experience anytime you try to merge or combine processes or systems it can be complicated. Plus people are pretty territorial when it comes to their systems and processes and are generally resistant to change. Perhaps a detailed change management plan might soothe some of their concerns.
    basically what you said, especially the bold.

    The problem with the meeting was that I heard about it the day before and it was really just a couple of execs saying "let's scope this". No project plan, very little direction, more high-level conversation which led to 2 weeks of meetings and putting "estimates" together. unfortunately the guy that walked us thru the processes on the Canada side then turned around and told everyone "OMG WE'RE ALL LOSING OUR JOBS" (or something to that effect...hyperbole, etc, etc)

    one of my old bosses told me "if you can improve your job so well that you're no longer needed, you'll always have a place to go within the company". worked well so far for me, I usually don't spend longer than 3 years in a position here.

    Also, Jen, great pic! If that's what free coffee does for you i'll be sure to carry some starbucks gift cards with me if I ever make it to AZ.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Which healthcare provider will euthanize you the fastest as a service to society?
    Coachella W2 - 4/25 Dillinger Escape Plan@Glass House - 5/1 The Horrors@First Unitarian Church - 5/9 Big Freedia@Echoplex - 6/28 Robyn/Royksopp@Bill Graham

  20. #1700
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Why nothing gets done at city/state/county offices:

    Our city manager decided to retire... I assume it wasn't a last minute decision so the city should have had some time to prepare, but for whatever reason they didn't. So there is now an acting city manager. One of the managers I work with informed me of the change and informed me that any documents that need to go out from 10/16 on need to have a new signature block showing the change. Because I am a doer I went through all of the templates I work with and changed the signature line, I also went through all the previously prepared documents that haven't gone out yet to make sure they were correct. I then sent an email to my team (I hate having to copy 15 people on an email) letting them know I made the change.

    I came back Saturday morning to 15 emails and 2 appointment requests so we can discuss the change. One manager gave me an atta girl for taking the initiative to make the change, while another chastised me for doing it before the law department approved the change... Which I had assumed had already happened considering the first manager told me to do it in the first place.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  21. #1701
    Banned marooko's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    congratulations on the new job.....I think.
    Originally Posted by Riggins33
    Why don't you show me a pic of what you look like and I'll send you a pick of myself. I'm 6'5 230....
    Quote Originally Posted by PotVsKtl View Post
    Would you care to list the fixes I've proposed?
    Quote Originally Posted by Dogvolta View Post
    Thank god I did't suck that guy's dick.

  22. #1702
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Thanks, but this is only my part time temporary job. I did get in with a fire protection company as an admin/billing clerk, I hate it a lot less than I do working for the city. I can curse and wear jeans, whoot.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  23. #1703
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    When working for a municipal body, always assume that red tape and long delays in getting anything done will take priority over efficiency and productivity, because it makes the lazy assholes that have been there doing next to nothing for 20 years look bad.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  24. #1704
    old school Robin's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    I did not realize the person I was talking on the phone with was stationed out on the east coast. We agreed to have another phone meeting at 0900 tomorrow morning. The calendar invite she sent me is now sitting on my calendar for 0600 PDT.

  25. #1705
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Robin View Post
    I did not realize the person I was talking on the phone with was stationed out on the east coast. We agreed to have another phone meeting at 0900 tomorrow morning. The calendar invite she sent me is now sitting on my calendar for 0600 PDT.
    You sent a request for a new time right?
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  26. #1706
    old school Robin's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    You sent a request for a new time right?
    I did. She read my email, but hasn't replied. I can do the 0600 meeting. I'll just still be in my pjs and not fully functional.

  27. #1707
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Robin View Post
    I'll just still be in my pjs and not fully functional.
    Working from home this pretty much describes my entire work day.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  28. #1708
    old school Robin's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    She just sent me an update. The latest time she's available is 0700 PDT. Working in pjs it is! At least this will give me time to brew some coffee and maybe get a shower in.

  29. #1709
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Robin View Post
    I did. She read my email, but hasn't replied. I can do the 0600 meeting. I'll just still be in my pjs and not fully functional.
    You should tell her to go fuck herself.
    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    HAY CAN SOMEONE DRIVE DOWN TO THE FESTIVAL GROUNDS AND SEE IF THE BEER BARN IS REALLY A BARN?

  30. #1710

    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    still waiting on my promo, been 8 months since i've been a receptionist (mother of the office, everyone's bitch especially my boss' & his faggotty ass douchey son) AND handling the claims for our company. been pretty stressful juggling both jobs & answering the phones efficiently while putting on the fakest smile on my face and kissing everyone's ass while getting shit done....my boss' stupid son just got another ridiculous bonus check, for nothing. he does absolutely nothing on his own, always asks for help and is the laughing stock of our office....

    looks like we're the laughing stock.

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