The Office Space Thread

[eskamo951]

Apparently coming down to my office to yell at me will make field space magically open up in the city...if it works that way, I'll let you all know so you can try next tiem you need something from your local government.

[Drinkey McDrinkerstein]

Apparently coming down to my office to yell at me will make field space magically open up in the city...if it works that way, I'll let you all know so you can try next tiem you need something from your local government.

I love giving rational explanations to completely irrational people.

And even though this is mostly graphic design-related, I think everyone in this thread could can sympathize and laugh at the brilliance in this website, if you're not already familiar:
http://clientsfromhell.net/

[eskamo951]

Oh man, I love our clerical staff. Our sassy latina worker is going to yell at the guy, tell him I had a family emergeny, and make him feel stupid if he tries to be a dick. She's great with these situations. Today has been horrible, I can't deal with anymore yelling.

[RageAgainstTheAoki]

The guy who sent me this submission yesterday:



Sent a follow up today....
"Why no reply? My ice forms are good and strong. You will like."

I hope the VP of R&D doesn't mind that I requested samples.

[guedita]

I work at the front desk of a Language Program for ESL students who need to improve English before transferring to the University. We just finished our summer semester and the students had to fill out an evaluation survey. One section they are asked to offer suggestions for how to improve the program outside of just their classes.

"Bersal Office Skin Head Person Unfriendly" is one of the suggestions.

[eskamo951]

The guy who sent me this submission yesterday:



Sent a follow up today....
"Why no reply? My ice forms are good and strong. You will like."

I hope the VP of R&D doesn't mind that I requested samples.

Did you ever get those samples?

[donkey sex]

The Farter
Too Much Hairspray-er
Mr. Hog the Coffee with his large alluminum industrial thermous continuously filled
The "Always going to the bathroom cus they don't want to do work" person
THe Complete Kiss Ass
Mr. Inappropriate Dirty Joke Teller
Miss Nylon Stockings/Skirt Outfit
The Deteriorating Downcast Divorcee who gives up more and more on life daily
The Slut

[eskamo951]

Classic Office Space moment today.

Boss 1:"Hey, we're having an event at ___ Park, book out the picnic shelter so we don't have any overcrowding"
Which I promptly did.

Boss 2: "Hey, did you see that email about the event? Book out the picnic shelter so we don't have overcrowding"

Boss 3: "Hey, could you book out the picnic shelter this Saturday so we don't have any overcrowding?"

One more month until I'm out of here...

[miscorrections]

Someone must've spilled something interesting/toxic in some nearby lab because the entire hallway is cordoned off. Awesome.

[Hannahrain]

I got a free promotional rape whistle today.

[J~$$$$]

There is only one thing to do now.

Rape Whistle song. ft Hannahrain.

[Hannahrain]

Oh, it doesn't actually work. It's merely a visual deterrent.

[J~$$$$]

I heard that wearing your rape whistle too low leads to rape.

[Hannahrain]

So does using it to whistle Al Green sexytime music while you walk around alone at night, but I'm set in my ways.

[J~$$$$]

You'll never be raped with that attitude.

[Hannahrain]

Or that face. Zing. Self-zing. Autozing.

[shakermaker113]

oh hey, I never noticed this thread before.

[RageAgainstTheAoki]

Did you ever get those samples?

Negative. I'm glad you reminded me. I think I still have the email. I better check on those samples.

[miscorrections]

So it turns out what I though was a spill down the hall was ACTUALLY vials of questionable substances and origin scattered throughout our wing. Someone's trying to murder us all.

[BeHereNOW]

I truly believe this guy 2 offices down the hall has a night job a as a clown
Otherwise I don’t understand it

[locachica73]

My boss and I just had an hour conversation about his past heroin addiction and his experiences while on mushrooms and acid while he was a hells angel. Good times.

[eskamo951]

My boss and I just had an hour conversation about his past heroin addiction and his experiences while on mushrooms and acid while he was a hells angel. Good times.

It's always fun finding someone else who isn't straight edge conservative in the work place. Had a nice conversation about music and some substances with one of my employees today.


Today's adventure: Had to deliver some supplies and the truck ignition got locked in the "on" position. I could not turn it off. I did not know that could happen. It's always something new and surprising in my department.

[locachica73]

It's always fun finding someone else who isn't straight edge conservative in the work place. Had a nice conversation about music and some substances with one of my employees today.

He is straight edge now, doesn't even drink anymore. But he definitely has some good stories. We talked music too. He has seen some of the shows I wish I could go back in time to see.

[djandrews25]

2 great quotes already this morning:
"business is blooming"
"that is optionable"

[BeHereNOW]

i wish i could pull out a couple of Ari Gold's at work
my credit card debt turn me down of course

[JustSteve]

Apparently coming down to my office to yell at me will make field space magically open up in the city...if it works that way, I'll let you all know so you can try next tiem you need something from your local government.

kinda like people here yelling at goldenvoice to make the polo fields bigger...

[eskamo951]

kinda like people here yelling at goldenvoice to make the polo fields bigger...

Hahaha, exactly!

Today's field conflict "Why was someone else given MY field space when I turned my paperwork in a month after the deadline?!" I wasn't aware that he owned the fields.

[chairmenmeow47]

there is currently a discussion a few cubes over about how if you smoke cigarettes you might as well do heroin because it's the same thing.

[BeHereNOW]

trannys attending hotel parties with national soccer players.
great office talk day

[PlayaDelWes]

We have electricity today, but yesterday was a giant clusterfuck.

Around 11, the lights went off because lightening hit something in the neighborhood. Usually, that’s not a big deal, because all of our computers, servers, and network devices are plugged into these special orange outlets that are run through a giant battery that keeps the critical equipment on until the generators kick in. Well, about 5 seconds after the lights went off, all the critical stuff went out too. The trading floor erupted so loudly that security rushed in to assess the anarchy.

After returning from lunch, the power was back on in the neighborhood, but ironically enough, not for our computers etc… There was a lot of standing around, early happy hours, and going home.