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Thread: The Office Space Thread

  1. #91
    old school eskamo951's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Apparently coming down to my office to yell at me will make field space magically open up in the city...if it works that way, I'll let you all know so you can try next tiem you need something from your local government.
    Sean Penn Acid Test 2008 - Legendary

    2008 , 2009, 2010, 2011 , 2012 wk1, 2013 wk2. 6 years running!

    Hell or highwater, fire and brimstone, not even cancer is powerful enough to keep me from Coachella!

  2. #92
    Coachella Junkie Drinkey McDrinkerstein's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by eskamo951 View Post
    Apparently coming down to my office to yell at me will make field space magically open up in the city...if it works that way, I'll let you all know so you can try next tiem you need something from your local government.
    I love giving rational explanations to completely irrational people.

    And even though this is mostly graphic design-related, I think everyone in this thread could can sympathize and laugh at the brilliance in this website, if you're not already familiar:
    http://clientsfromhell.net/
    last.fm
    8/23-24/14 FYF Fest - Expo Park //8/25/14 Nine Inch Nails - Hollywood Bowl // 9/6/14 Elvis Costello & Ben Folds - Hollywood Bowl
    9/12-14/14 Riotfest - Humboldt Park, Chicago, IL // 9/18/14 Neutral Milk Hotel - Hollywood Bowl

  3. #93
    old school eskamo951's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Oh man, I love our clerical staff. Our sassy latina worker is going to yell at the guy, tell him I had a family emergeny, and make him feel stupid if he tries to be a dick. She's great with these situations. Today has been horrible, I can't deal with anymore yelling.
    Sean Penn Acid Test 2008 - Legendary

    2008 , 2009, 2010, 2011 , 2012 wk1, 2013 wk2. 6 years running!

    Hell or highwater, fire and brimstone, not even cancer is powerful enough to keep me from Coachella!

  4. #94
    old school RageAgainstTheAoki's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    The guy who sent me this submission yesterday:



    Sent a follow up today....
    "Why no reply? My ice forms are good and strong. You will like."

    I hope the VP of R&D doesn't mind that I requested samples.

  5. #95
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    I work at the front desk of a Language Program for ESL students who need to improve English before transferring to the University. We just finished our summer semester and the students had to fill out an evaluation survey. One section they are asked to offer suggestions for how to improve the program outside of just their classes.

    "Bersal Office Skin Head Person Unfriendly" is one of the suggestions.

    8/30: Peaking Lights @ The Chapel
    9/3: Bear in Heaven @ The Independent
    9/11: Tomas Barfod @ The Rickshaw Stop
    9/12: Shifted @ Mercer
    9/24 - 28: Decibel Festival
    10/3-5: Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival
    10/4: Ought @ BoH
    10/5: The War on Drugs, Cass McCombs @ The Fillmore
    10/18-19: Treasure Island Music Festival

  6. #96
    old school eskamo951's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by RageAgainstTheAoki View Post
    The guy who sent me this submission yesterday:



    Sent a follow up today....
    "Why no reply? My ice forms are good and strong. You will like."

    I hope the VP of R&D doesn't mind that I requested samples.
    Did you ever get those samples?
    Sean Penn Acid Test 2008 - Legendary

    2008 , 2009, 2010, 2011 , 2012 wk1, 2013 wk2. 6 years running!

    Hell or highwater, fire and brimstone, not even cancer is powerful enough to keep me from Coachella!

  7. #97
    Member donkey sex's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    The Farter
    Too Much Hairspray-er
    Mr. Hog the Coffee with his large alluminum industrial thermous continuously filled
    The "Always going to the bathroom cus they don't want to do work" person
    THe Complete Kiss Ass
    Mr. Inappropriate Dirty Joke Teller
    Miss Nylon Stockings/Skirt Outfit
    The Deteriorating Downcast Divorcee who gives up more and more on life daily
    The Slut
    *there are plans, but they have no dates*

  8. #98
    old school eskamo951's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Classic Office Space moment today.

    Boss 1:"Hey, we're having an event at ___ Park, book out the picnic shelter so we don't have any overcrowding"
    Which I promptly did.

    Boss 2: "Hey, did you see that email about the event? Book out the picnic shelter so we don't have overcrowding"

    Boss 3: "Hey, could you book out the picnic shelter this Saturday so we don't have any overcrowding?"

    One more month until I'm out of here...
    Sean Penn Acid Test 2008 - Legendary

    2008 , 2009, 2010, 2011 , 2012 wk1, 2013 wk2. 6 years running!

    Hell or highwater, fire and brimstone, not even cancer is powerful enough to keep me from Coachella!

  9. #99
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Someone must've spilled something interesting/toxic in some nearby lab because the entire hallway is cordoned off. Awesome.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  10. #100
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    I got a free promotional rape whistle today.

  11. #101
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    There is only one thing to do now.

    Rape Whistle song. ft Hannahrain.

  12. #102
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Oh, it doesn't actually work. It's merely a visual deterrent.

  13. #103
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    I heard that wearing your rape whistle too low leads to rape.

  14. #104
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    So does using it to whistle Al Green sexytime music while you walk around alone at night, but I'm set in my ways.

  15. #105
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    You'll never be raped with that attitude.

  16. #106
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Or that face. Zing. Self-zing. Autozing.

  17. #107
    Coachella Junkie shakermaker113's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    oh hey, I never noticed this thread before.

  18. #108
    old school RageAgainstTheAoki's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by eskamo951 View Post
    Did you ever get those samples?
    Negative. I'm glad you reminded me. I think I still have the email. I better check on those samples.

  19. #109
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    So it turns out what I though was a spill down the hall was ACTUALLY vials of questionable substances and origin scattered throughout our wing. Someone's trying to murder us all.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  20. #110
    Member BeHereNOW's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    I truly believe this guy 2 offices down the hall has a night job a as a clown
    Otherwise I don’t understand it

  21. #111
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    My boss and I just had an hour conversation about his past heroin addiction and his experiences while on mushrooms and acid while he was a hells angel. Good times.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  22. #112
    old school eskamo951's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by locachica73 View Post
    My boss and I just had an hour conversation about his past heroin addiction and his experiences while on mushrooms and acid while he was a hells angel. Good times.
    It's always fun finding someone else who isn't straight edge conservative in the work place. Had a nice conversation about music and some substances with one of my employees today.


    Today's adventure: Had to deliver some supplies and the truck ignition got locked in the "on" position. I could not turn it off. I did not know that could happen. It's always something new and surprising in my department.
    Sean Penn Acid Test 2008 - Legendary

    2008 , 2009, 2010, 2011 , 2012 wk1, 2013 wk2. 6 years running!

    Hell or highwater, fire and brimstone, not even cancer is powerful enough to keep me from Coachella!

  23. #113
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by eskamo951 View Post
    It's always fun finding someone else who isn't straight edge conservative in the work place. Had a nice conversation about music and some substances with one of my employees today.
    He is straight edge now, doesn't even drink anymore. But he definitely has some good stories. We talked music too. He has seen some of the shows I wish I could go back in time to see.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  24. #114
    old school djandrews25's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    2 great quotes already this morning:
    "business is blooming"
    "that is optionable"
    Quote Originally Posted by juloxx View Post
    Shut the fuck up you pussy. If you dont get down with Westside Connection you have no credibility in the music world what so-ever. Get off these forums you *** *** and go bump your N'sync
    Quote Originally Posted by Goatchella View Post
    I'm down with westside connect....fail again

  25. #115
    Member BeHereNOW's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    i wish i could pull out a couple of Ari Gold's at work
    my credit card debt turn me down of course

  26. #116
    Pedley Rocks JustSteve's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by eskamo951 View Post
    Apparently coming down to my office to yell at me will make field space magically open up in the city...if it works that way, I'll let you all know so you can try next tiem you need something from your local government.
    kinda like people here yelling at goldenvoice to make the polo fields bigger...

  27. #117
    old school eskamo951's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by JustSteve View Post
    kinda like people here yelling at goldenvoice to make the polo fields bigger...
    Hahaha, exactly!

    Today's field conflict "Why was someone else given MY field space when I turned my paperwork in a month after the deadline?!" I wasn't aware that he owned the fields.
    Sean Penn Acid Test 2008 - Legendary

    2008 , 2009, 2010, 2011 , 2012 wk1, 2013 wk2. 6 years running!

    Hell or highwater, fire and brimstone, not even cancer is powerful enough to keep me from Coachella!

  28. #118
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    there is currently a discussion a few cubes over about how if you smoke cigarettes you might as well do heroin because it's the same thing.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  29. #119
    Member BeHereNOW's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    trannys attending hotel parties with national soccer players.
    great office talk day

  30. #120
    Coachella Junkie PlayaDelWes's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Office Space Thread

    We have electricity today, but yesterday was a giant clusterfuck.

    Around 11, the lights went off because lightening hit something in the neighborhood. Usually, that’s not a big deal, because all of our computers, servers, and network devices are plugged into these special orange outlets that are run through a giant battery that keeps the critical equipment on until the generators kick in. Well, about 5 seconds after the lights went off, all the critical stuff went out too. The trading floor erupted so loudly that security rushed in to assess the anarchy.

    After returning from lunch, the power was back on in the neighborhood, but ironically enough, not for our computers etc… There was a lot of standing around, early happy hours, and going home.

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