The Office Space Thread

[Somewhat Damaged]

A coworker in my old department was standing in the way of my path to the fridge this morning, talking to another coworker from that same department. I slowed my approach, hoping that seeing me would prompt her to position herself so she wasn't in the way. It didn't. She was talking about what her duties are and I finally interrupted to say, "Stand in people's way," and just walked in between her and the person she was talking to.

[RageAgainstTheAoki]

Well, now, you sound like a ray of sunshine at the office.

[locachica73]

I was very down yesterday and may have been seen crying at my desk at some point. Today I showed up to find a long stem red rose on my desk. I wish someone had left a name so I knew who to thank.

[ThatGirl]

That's so nice!

[Mr. Fuzz]

Blowjobs for everyone in the breakroom!

[guedita]

I spearheaded and operate the facebook page for the program I work for, which is about 15 minutes of work per week. The amount of praise I get from my coworkers and boss for managing this facebook page is grossly disproportionate to the effort I make.

[chairmenmeow47]

i get the same kind of praise for knowing how to spell check with F7 and for using find & replace.

hey guys, if you're going to change the meeting time to after it's already started, maybe let those of us sitting in the conference room know.

[guedita]

Coworker 1: Cara, those packets you made for orientation looked PHENOMENAL! So organized, so many different colored paper....Wow! I was so impressed!

Me: Oh, those? I minored in aesthetic collation in college.

Coworker 2: That's a strange sounding degree, what kind of classes did you have to take for that?

[ThatGirl]

Coworker 1: Cara, those packets you made for orientation looked PHENOMENAL! So organized, so many different colored paper....Wow! I was so impressed!

Me: Oh, those? I minored in aesthetic collation in college.

Coworker 2: That's a strange sounding degree, what kind of classes did you have to take for that?

I laughed for a few minutes only imagining the look on your face as a result of this commentary.

[PlayaDelWes]

My boss’ boss (who I’ve never met) is in town this week and hour one-on-ones have been scheduled for each of us (all my boss’ DRs). Specifically, I’ve been told to pick a couple topics that he’ll be interested in, and that I know cold. After some procrastination, I think what I put together may fill the hour, but we’ll see. I usually don’t get nervous about things like this, but I’ve had dreams about it for the last few days and now to kill the last few minutes, I’m posting on internet forums.

[nyarlathotoats]

My boss’ boss (who I’ve never met) is in town this week and hour one-on-ones have been scheduled for each of us (all my boss’ DRs). Specifically, I’ve been told to pick a couple topics that he’ll be interested in, and that I know cold. After some procrastination, I think what I put together may fill the hour, but we’ll see. I usually don’t get nervous about things like this, but I’ve had dreams about it for the last few days and now to kill the last few minutes, I’m posting on internet forums.

LOL. Playa, how did it go? Are you alive?

[shakermaker113]

I'm tired of presentations going black because the person who connected their laptop to the projector didn't turn off the power saving option that disables the screen after five minutes of inactivity. how are you people running companies?

[Drinkey McDrinkerstein]

I had to explain the other day to a client, the head of a digital marketing company, that his usb drive wasn't "broken," and the reason is was telling him it was 'full," was because he hadn't emptied his recycle bin on his computer.

[guedita]

I'm aware that the copier is out of toner. Because I put a sign on it informing you that more is coming.

[Mugwog]

I'm tired of presentations going black because the person who connected their laptop to the projector didn't turn off the power saving option that disables the screen after five minutes of inactivity. how are you people running companies?

I had to explain the other day to a client, the head of a digital marketing company, that his usb drive wasn't "broken," and the reason is was telling him it was 'full," was because he hadn't emptied his recycle bin on his computer.

I'm aware that the copier is out of toner. Because I put a sign on it informing you that more is coming.

You are all very patient individuals.

[amyzzz]

I'm here for overtime, and I've been on the phone with another department for 45 minutes. It's gonna be one of those days. *sigh*

[Robin]

On my lunch, I'm looking up other jobs because I don't really like mine. My boss comes to my desk as I have a screen open that says "Human Resources Generalist" really big on top. Oops.

[locachica73]

My boss and my coworker decided to come into my office for yet another meeting on what it is we are looking for in the new people we are going to be hiring. We have been talking about this shit for 2 months now and have yet to place an ad. So I am a little frustrated with all the talking, just fucking do it all ready. My boss caught me rolling my eyes and decided to close the door to yell at us. After some yelling and me explaining that I am sick of talking about it and just want it done already, he calmed down enough to ask me to place the ad. He then asked if I thought Craigslist or Careerbuilder is better. I said, "Well I look in both... OOPS! I mean, I use to look in both..." My boss is convinced I am quitting my job now. I need to stop being so fucking honest.

[Drinkey McDrinkerstein]

YOU DON'T HAVE TO SCREAM WHEN YOU ARE ON SPEAKERPHONE

[Mugwog]

Nor does it help translate english to non english speakers

[nyarlathotoats]

So since we've gotten a new boss, I've actually not had to do other people's work, which is nice foe a change; on the flipside, i feel more stressed than ever because new projects keep coming, and coming...

[RageAgainstTheAoki]

Approaching my last day of a convention in Vegas. I managed my company's presence at this conference; months of work. Exhausting. My first time ever doing this. And everyone was happy with my work. So much so that my boss is putting me in charge of all national conventions moving forward. This is.... horrifying.

[caeden]

work hard, do good job, get screwed over by your own competence

[amyzzz]

Holy crap. I just got off an awful call with a customer. No we can't give you your phone number back because when you shut it off with Magic Jack, Cox took it and gave it to someone else. Ugh.

[amyzzz]

Re: my union's contract renegotiations with my employer (telephone company), my cubemates are in an uproar because another co-worker who will be on vacation through October 6 (the day our contract expires) had to give her manager her ID badge and headset upon leaving work today. This has us wondering if we will all have to turn in our ID badges and headsets the day before we could potentially go on strike. I actually don't care a whole lot about that, but my co-workers think our employer is not acting in good faith by doing that.

[kitt kat]

This morning, I brought myself a prepackaged Trader Joe's salad for lunch.

Ten minutes ago, I went to the fridge to eat my salad.

My salad wasn't there.

WHO FUCKING STEALS SOMEONE ELSE'S PREPACKAGED LUNCH FROM THE FRIDGE!?

Is it rude of me if I put a note on the fridge asking whomever ate it to come reimburse me for my lunch? That was $5 wasted.

[heart cooks brain]

you should shin kick the perpetrator. totally worth $5.

[guedita]

Who do you suspect did it?

I worked as a receptionist at Wells Fargo Home Mortgage one summer to pay for a cruise after I graduated highschool and one day I got high during lunch and ate a coworker's entire tub of cream cheese. Then I tore down the signs that they posted demanding that it be replaced.

[guedita]

God that was a great summer.

[amyzzz]

This morning, I brought myself a prepackaged Trader Joe's salad for lunch.

Ten minutes ago, I went to the fridge to eat my salad.

My salad wasn't there.

WHO FUCKING STEALS SOMEONE ELSE'S PREPACKAGED LUNCH FROM THE FRIDGE!?

Is it rude of me if I put a note on the fridge asking whomever ate it to come reimburse me for my lunch? That was $5 wasted.

A lot of people do it apparently. It happens every once in a while at my work. I would trying to disguise the pre-packaged-ness of your lunch in the future so they don't know what it is readily.