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Thread: Sex Stories

  1. #1

    Default Sex Stories

    Share them. *unzips pants*
    Quote Originally Posted by NiceArthur32 View Post
    what happens if someone makes a masturbation while i dancing so fast?
    Quote Originally Posted by Riggins33 View Post
    Ohh are you laughing Lithium??! You are soooo cool. You know so much more than everyone else don't you? Nerd.
    Quote Originally Posted by mbellingham View Post
    Thanks for your comment, Major Asshole (Lithium )

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    BJ in the car while waiting to go in 08..... she took it and i was thankful!

  3. #3

    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Having high sex for the first time on the first night last year.
    My gf saying "I'm to wet" out loud, because shes to high, and then our tent neighbors just start giggling.

  4. #4
    Coachella Junkie Monklish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    ... "too wet?" Since fucking when is there such a thing as a too wet vagoo?
    Quote Originally Posted by Monklish View Post
    Fuck you and fuck Haiti.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Sex Stories

    yeah i know that's what i always say but i guess when it gets the sheets dirty on the first night yah know.

  6. #6
    Coachella Junkie Monklish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    ... no, I don't know. What the fuck are you talking about?
    Quote Originally Posted by Monklish View Post
    Fuck you and fuck Haiti.

  7. #7
    Coachella Junkie SoulDischarge's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    If prostitution were legal, this board would be a lot more tolerable place to be around.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    too wet? holy shit that hilarious.... when it gets like that, you get a shot at the poopshoot with all the goo thats down there!!!!!!! hahaha

  9. #9

    Default Re: Sex Stories

    hahahahahahahahaha
    LOL! <33
    Quote Originally Posted by Zafocaine View Post
    Great advertising strategy for her vagina though! As if having a vagina weren't all a vagina needed. Now introducing the Lustful Scorned Lover scent, by RSW.

  10. #10
    Coachella Junkie fatbastard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by scoop49er View Post
    too wet? holy shit that hilarious.... when it gets like that, you get a shot at the poopshoot with all the goo thats down there!!!!!!! hahaha
    Thank goodness: a clear and helpful recommendation that everyone can utilize. I'll speculate about the lineup with you anytime.
    Whiskey Sour

    2 oz blended whiskey
    Juice of 1/2 lemon
    1/2 tsp powdered sugar
    1 cherry
    1/2 slice lemon

    Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.

  11. #11
    Member MaXiMuS501's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Now that is the type of info that this thread was created for!

  12. #12

    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by MaXiMuS501 View Post
    Now that is the type of info that this thread was created for!
    this is agreed. keep 'em coming. heh, coming...
    Quote Originally Posted by NiceArthur32 View Post
    what happens if someone makes a masturbation while i dancing so fast?
    Quote Originally Posted by Riggins33 View Post
    Ohh are you laughing Lithium??! You are soooo cool. You know so much more than everyone else don't you? Nerd.
    Quote Originally Posted by mbellingham View Post
    Thanks for your comment, Major Asshole (Lithium )

  13. #13
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    just remember, a girl's ass muscle flexes back and forth so get it moist and wait for the right time when it pulsates to a wide opening and its a home run!!!

    love,

    scoop49er

  14. #14
    Member WizardIsAboutToDie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Where did you do your OB-GYN residency?

  15. #15

    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by Monklish View Post
    ... no, I don't know. What the fuck are you talking about?
    You poor poor man.

    Quote Originally Posted by scoop49er View Post
    too wet? holy shit that hilarious.... when it gets like that, you get a shot at the poopshoot with all the goo thats down there!!!!!!! hahaha
    I think i have a new goal for coachella 10.

  16. #16

    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by scoop49er View Post
    too wet? holy shit that hilarious.... when it gets like that, you get a shot at the poopshoot with all the goo thats down there!!!!!!! hahaha
    Guys, if you take a "shot at the poopshoot" without asking first, then she gets an automatic shot at your poopshoot.

    It's only fair.

  17. #17
    The Bionic Listener Theijuiel's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by koliebo View Post
    Guys, if you take a "shot at the poopshoot" without asking first, then she gets an automatic shot at your poopshoot.

    It's only fair.

    With a 2 foot dildo,





















    still in the box.
    "Give me women, wine and snuff
    Until I cry out 'hold, enough!"
    John Keats

  18. #18
    Coachella Junkie Aurgasm's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    It was 2007. I went to see Gotan Project with the intention of dancing with various Latin girls. Instead I wound up with a Norwegian group..

    long story short.. we made it back to my tent and she brought with her a beeding kit of source.. rave candi stuff. A few shrooms and a couple horribly made bracelets later things heated up and I found myself having rough sex with a hippie norwegian while Tiesto blared overhead.

    the morning scene was remarkable. there i was...alone, beeds sticking to my ass and my back. The tent looked like if someone had thrown a hand grenade into Feather's bedroom..beads and craft stuff everywhere. my buddy slept outside the whole night...thanks Max!

    Never saw her again.
    Last edited by Aurgasm; 01-20-2010 at 11:48 AM.
    Rhythm is a dancer.

  19. #19
    Member GrossMagic's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    ^ I think you have Gotan to thank for that.

  20. #20
    Coachella Junkie Aurgasm's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by jgonen View Post
    ^ I think you have Gotan to thank for that.
    I give 100% to Gotan.

    I tried the same technique for Thievery Corp. last year and just ended up pissing off a bunch of bf's...

    its hit or miss. Gotta find that awesome crew of foreigners who are down for whatever. In my music festival experience they can be found for sure at 'world music' acts...
    Rhythm is a dancer.

  21. #21
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    I would say banging a bead-laden hippie falls more under the banner of shameful than high-five-ful.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  22. #22
    Coachella Junkie Aurgasm's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    I would say banging a bead-laden hippie falls more under the banner of shameful than high-five-ful.
    In most cases I'd agree.. but this hippie was interesting, intelligent and gorgeous.

    Living in Denver, I come across of bead-laden hippies who would certainly evoke a "ehhh its pussy" whereas this one was like "wow its pussy with a brain and some cunning"

    You ever have any shameful hook ups at coach misco? I've had plenty of drug fueled make out sessions..but my Norwegian was the only non-gf hook up in my coach history.
    Rhythm is a dancer.

  23. #23
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    I'm not about to relay details of sex I may or may not have had at Coachella.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  24. #24
    Beefy Soft Taco TommyboyUNM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    I can count on one hand how many people on this board I'd like to read sex stories about. None have posted in this thread so far.

  25. #25
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    This thread makes me ashamed to be human. today anyway.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  26. #26
    Coachella Junkie Monklish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by TommyboyUNM View Post
    I can count on one hand how many people on this board I'd like to read sex stories about. None have posted in this thread so far.
    Four of Tommy's picks are me.
    Quote Originally Posted by Monklish View Post
    Fuck you and fuck Haiti.

  27. #27
    Beefy Soft Taco TommyboyUNM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Watch you have sex? Sure. Read about it? Eww.

  28. #28
    Coachella Junkie weeklymix's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    This thread was a bit of a letdown I just hope I'm one of Tommy's fantasies.

  29. #29
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by TommyboyUNM View Post
    I can count on one hand how many people on this board I'd like to read sex stories about. None have posted in this thread so far.
    "Once upon a time, long ago..."
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  30. #30

    Default Re: Sex Stories

    Quote Originally Posted by SexPot View Post
    here is an excerpt from a 12 page recap of a threesome I had. enjoy. i have obviously changed my name and I am a Coachella vet
    you seriously wrote 11 more pages of this

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