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Thread: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

  1. #5911
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    I also have one of those in my feed.
    #gameface #trust #attackmode #believe #selflove #determination #hardwork #iamlistening #guidance
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  2. #5912
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Quote Originally Posted by fetuspiniata View Post
    I wasn't against hashtags until a girl in my training class at my new job added me on facebook. "Happy Hump Day!!! ‪#‎wednesday‬ ‪#‎almostthere‬ ‪#‎strength‬ ‪#‎midweek‬ ‪#‎humpday‬ ‪#‎whiteshirt‬ ‪#‎jeans‬ ‪#‎ootd‬ ‪#‎longhair‬ ‪#‎happy‬ ‪#‎goodvibes‬ ‪#‎staypositive"
    WHAT DOES LONG HAIR HAVE TO DO WITH THE RETARDEDNESS OF HUMP DAY?!?!

    also, when i walked into work yesterday after being off sick, this different security guard than normal was there and was all chipper and said "happy hump day" like the stupid commercial. i almost walked out of the building.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  3. #5913

    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    I'm guessing those are posts from instagram where it seems to be a contest of how many annoying hashtags you can come up with for every image.
    last.fm | facebook | twitter | tumblr
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  4. #5914
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Yep.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  5. #5915
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    WHAT DOES LONG HAIR HAVE TO DO WITH THE RETARDEDNESS OF HUMP DAY?!?!

    also, when i walked into work yesterday after being off sick, this different security guard than normal was there and was all chipper and said "happy hump day" like the stupid commercial. i almost walked out of the building.
    The horrible people I work with play the commercial over the intercom system every fucking Wednesday.

    They also play what does the fox say thing over the intercom regularly.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  6. #5916

    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Where do you work? That sounds awful, I wouldnt make it longer than a month there
    you are soooooooo good lookin

  7. #5917
    old school ThatGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Quote Originally Posted by locachica73 View Post

    They also play what does the fox say thing over the intercom regularly.
    That should be grounds for termination.
    Quote Originally Posted by M Sparks View Post
    It's all riding on this. You've got big dreams to ride to the top of the Flash Mob world. Well internet fame costs. And right now is when you start paying for it...in sweat.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    hey. get your own colonoscopy thread, bitch.

  8. #5918
    old school unit300021's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    So I added and deleted a person in record time this morning for me. Added me, I couldn't tell who he was from his profile picture but I shared close to 50 mutual friends with him. I accept it just to see who the hell he is. I figure it out but next thing I know he starts sending me request to like all of his shit so I delete him.

    Also what is the deal with all these fucking buzzfeed quizzes? Like I give a shit at what character someone from the Hunger Games is at all. I used to like buzzfeed but now it's just annoying as hell.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Why aren't there more good role models for fat people who fall down a lot?

  9. #5919
    Banned marooko's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    I still don't get why you people add others you don't know. fucking strange.

  10. #5920
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    I've had a few friend requests from people that I assume are on the board because of shared mutual friends, but I still have no fucking clue who they are. So I don't accept.

    11/28: Dixon @ TBA
    12/1: Angel Olsen, Kevin Morby @ GAMH
    12/6: Dream Police @ Brick and Mortar
    12/12: Ancient Methods @ Mercer
    12/13: RRose, Carlos Souffrant @ TBA
    12/17: Sleepy Sun @ Brick and Mortar

  11. #5921
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    ever have those days where you feel like a million bucks when you look in the mirror then you take a selfie and see every imperfection possible not even a filter can help? yeah, me too
    THERE'S A SOLUTION TO THIS PROBLEM

    11/28: Dixon @ TBA
    12/1: Angel Olsen, Kevin Morby @ GAMH
    12/6: Dream Police @ Brick and Mortar
    12/12: Ancient Methods @ Mercer
    12/13: RRose, Carlos Souffrant @ TBA
    12/17: Sleepy Sun @ Brick and Mortar

  12. #5922
    Coachella Junkie nathanfairchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Same guy from earlier:

    Nobel prize for work on atomic radius as it applies to an internal covalent radius and its emission of positrons to produce an endless amount of exothermic heat and light as energy from the nucleus of a stable isotopic form of the previously unstable decaying element ununseptium is in my reach! I don't know how or why but ladies and gentlemen I have solved the world energy problem indefinitely..

    November 18 - Slayer
    November 19 - eyehategod
    December 4 - Behemoth
    January 30 - Behemoth
    February 3 - Zola Jesus
    February 6 - Sleep

  13. #5923
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    i think i am done with birthday greetings. too fucking many. it feels like a chore.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  14. #5924
    old school unit300021's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    I stopped doing that for the most part awhile ago. I figure the peoples birthday I really care I don't need Facebook to tell me when it is and I need to do more then just a Facebook post.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Why aren't there more good role models for fat people who fall down a lot?

  15. #5925
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Am I the only one with friends sharing an ungodly amount of "So and so did this. What happened next was unbelievable." stories? Is that, like, a thing now

  16. #5926
    old school HotHamWater's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    After leaving Facebook last May, the amount of greetings I got for my birthday in November went down by probably 95% from the year prior.

  17. #5927
    The Encyclopedia bmack86's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Quote Originally Posted by nathanfairchild View Post
    Same guy from earlier:
    Is his endless heat source all the fucking hot air he seems to be constantly releasing? What an idiot.
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    Remember Hitler? I don't but here we are again .. cr****

  18. #5928
    Coachella Junkie SoulDischarge's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    i think i am done with birthday greetings. too fucking many. it feels like a chore.
    It really simplifies everything.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Thanks for giving us the opportunity to not give a fuck again.

  19. #5929
    Coachella Junkie nathanfairchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    new gem tonight:

    *NOTE A FIRE ANT CAN VARY IN ITS SIZE BUT I USE 0.18 INCHES FOR ITS MAIN BODY LENGTH DUE TO THE RANGE OF FIRE ANT SIZES COMES TO 0.14"-0.22" THUS GIVING A MEDIAN SIZE OF 0.18" FOR THE BODY. ALSO NOTE THAT AT 0.18" LONG THE FIRE ANT CAN TRAVEL 4 INCHES IN 1 SECOND. THIS IS 22.222_ TIMES THE LENGTH OF ITS OWN BODY PER SECOND. THUS THE BELOW NUMBERS COME FROM CALCULATING RELATIVE SPEEDS OF A FIRE ANT IF IT WERE THE OVERALL SIZE, LENGTH WISE OF EACH ANIMAL I DEPICT BELOW. THE NUMBERS ARE CALCULATED TO EXACT VALUES AND TRANSLATING INCHES PER SECOND TO FEET PER SECOND IS DONE.THIS IS BY DIVIDING THE SPEED OF THE FIRE ANT AT WHICH EVER SIZE ITS COMPARED TO BY 12 INCHES FOR CONVERTING IT TO FEET PER SECOND. AFTER CONVERTING TO FEET PER SECOND I DIVIDE BY 88 THEN TIMES THE RESULT BY 60 THUS GIVING AN ACCURATE SPEED FOR THE FINAL RESULT. THIS IS DONE BECAUSE 60 MILES PER HOUR IS ONE MILE IN ONE MINUTE. THERE ARE 5,280 FEET IN 1 MILE AND 60 SECONDS IN 1 MINUTE. SO IF YOU DIVIDE 5,280 FEET BY 60 SECONDS THE ANSWER WILL BE APPROXIMATELY 88. MEANING YOU MUST TRAVEL 88 FEET EVERY SECOND IF YOU ARE GOING 60 MPH WHICH WILL AND WOULD AND IS 1 MILE A MINUTE. AND THUS I DIVIDE THE SPEED OF THE FIRE ANT AT EACH DIFFERENT COMPARED SIZE FROM ITS FEET PER SECOND BY 88 WHICH WILL TELL ME HOW MUCH IN TERMS OF PERCENT THE SPEED IS OF 60 MPH. MEANING 44 FEET PER SECOND AS A THEORETICAL SPEED EQUALS .50 OF 88 FEET PER SECOND. AND THUS, IT EQUALS .50 OF 60 MPH SINCE 88 FEET PER SECOND EQUALS 60 MILES PER HOUR. AND SO 44 FEET EVERY SECOND EQUALS 30 MILES PER HOUR. THAT IS HOW I CONVERT THE SPEEDS OF THE FIRE ANT WHEN SCALE UP TO ANIMALS OF DIFFERENT VARYING SIZES. ENJOY THE CALCULATIONS! LONG LIVE THE MAJESTIC SPEED DEMON FIRE ANT!!!!

    If a fire ant at 0.18 inches was the following sizes larger
    AT the size of: Running Speed
    V V
    1) Fire Ant:0.18" @0.18"=>4 inches per second

    =0.2273 MPH <-COMPARED TO->A leaf falling from a tree

    2) Cricket:1"-2" @1.5"=>33.333 inches per second

    =1.894 MPH <-COMPARED TO->A baby walking briskly

    3) Mouse:2.5"-4" @3.25"=>72.222 inches per second

    =4.10354 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> A normal walking pace

    4) Rat:4"-8" @6.00"=>133.333 inches per second

    =7.576 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> A fast jogging speed/run

    5) Rabbit:9"-14" @11.50"=>255.555 inches per second

    =14.5202 MPH <-COMPARED TO->Fast Running Speed for Avg Person

    6) House cat:14"-22" @18.00"=>400 inches per second

    =22.727 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> Speed of most College runners

    7) Fox:17"-26" @21.50"=>477.78 inches per second

    =27.1465 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> Speed of Olympic Sprinters

    8) Bobcat:24"-36" @30.00"=>666.667 inches per second

    =37.8788 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> Speed of most cars on side roads

    9) German Shepard"-48" @43.50"=>966.667 inches per second

    =54.924 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> Minimum speed of an avg highway

    10) Lion:6'3" or 75" @75.00"=>1,666.667 inches per second

    =94.697 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> Speed of a fast ball in baseball

    11) Tiger:8' or 96" @96.00"=>2,133.333 inches per second

    =121.212 MPH <-COMPARED TO->Thrill Dragster roller coaster,Ohio

    12) Horse:10' or 120" @120.0"=>2,666.667 inches per second

    =151.515 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> Top speed of a golfball drive

    13) Car:20' or 240" @240.0"=>5,333.333 inches per second

    =303.0303 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> Speed of worlds fastest tornado,OK

    14) Fire Truck:50' or 600" @600.0"=>13,333.333 inches per second

    =757.576 MPH <-COMPARED TO->Speed of sound traveling through air

    15) 747 Passenger plane:250'/3,000" @3,000.0"=>66,666.667 inches per second

    =3,787.8788 MPH <-COMPARED TO->.204 caliber ruger bullet in flight

    16) Carnival Cruise
    Liner "Victory" : 893'/10,716" @10,716.0"=>238,133.333 inches per second

    =13,530.303 MPH <-COMPARED TO-> Falcon Hypersonic Research Vehicle By D.A.R.P.A
    I don't even.....

    November 18 - Slayer
    November 19 - eyehategod
    December 4 - Behemoth
    January 30 - Behemoth
    February 3 - Zola Jesus
    February 6 - Sleep

  20. #5930
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates


  21. #5931
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    "A word of advice, don't ever take a laxative with a sleeping pill. Trust me."

  22. #5932
    Member Phantasma Del Mar's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    lol.

  23. #5933
    Member Phantasma Del Mar's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    It's about someone who shit themself.

  24. #5934
    Member Phantasma Del Mar's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Like a baby.

  25. #5935

    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    THERE'S A SOLUTION TO THIS PROBLEM
    THERE'S A SOLUTION TO THIS PROBLEM.
    Quote Originally Posted by fatbastard View Post
    Don't ever use Paul's name again in a posting. YOU GOT THAT YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKER? Paul was making his bones in the business back when you were just cum in your mother's ear.

  26. #5936
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates


  27. #5937
    Member gazercmh's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    One of my FB friends is a huge Denver Broncos fan and talked shit constantly through the playoffs about how the Broncos were going all the way. When the Broncos would beat other teams in the playoffs, he'd post big in-your-face rants and tag friends who rooted for the losing team just to make sure they saw his posts.

    By the fourth quarter of yesterday's "game," he had deleted his account.

  28. #5938
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates


  29. #5939
    old school unit300021's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Apparently people are upset about the Coke commercial which had America The Beautiful sung in different languages... Really people.

    F You Coke ! When my Ancestors came here, they could only speak Gaelic or German. In order to fit in and get jobs they had to learn English . There was no PRESS 1 for Gaelic. Every legal immigrant should be required to learn English
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Why aren't there more good role models for fat people who fall down a lot?

  30. #5940
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

    Quote Originally Posted by unit300021 View Post
    Apparently people are upset about the Coke commercial which had America The Beautiful sung in different languages... Really people.
    I am getting the same posts, except the girl kept referring to it as the national anthem.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

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