The Thread In Which We Post Our Facebook Friends' Annoying Status Updates

[stuporfly]

attourney

[SoulDischarge]

Godfuckingdammit. One of my fuckbuddies who I actually like a lot and have considered maybe dating in the past just posted one of those stupid graphics of totalitarian leaders that says "Gun Control Hall Of Fame" at the top. I need to just not have contact with people ever.

EDIT: I commented on it "Sigh, not you too." And his original post disappeared.

[JorgeC]

awwww, if he edited the post, it means he cares what you think about him. Hatefuck him really hard next time.

[GuyInTucson]

[gazercmh]

Jesus forgot to capitalize "Me" in his last reply.

[unit300021]

I just deleted a friend who has been pretty quite about political stuff but the past week been posting nothing but pro Rand Paul and gun rights stuff. Have to weed out the crazies right?

[betao]

Obama using children as props to push his gun laws (confiscation) hmmm wonder where else in history I have heard this oh wait Hitler where he then confiscated gun and killed 7 million Jews and 5 million political dissidents.

Saw this twice yesterday. Words cannot express the stupidity.

[unit300021]

I just say my first ever "such and such liked that such and such likes ...."

Not a status update but a Facebook update I guess? Why do I need to know of a like of a like?

[Neighborhood Creep]

My 16 year old white cousin-in-law.



My nephew my son *****! Fuck you kno bout bein grown and takin care of grown man shit!

If any ***** no me, he no I don't believe in excuses or complaints. I believe that you deal with shit how it come, good shit, bad shit, real life shit, or even death! So for you bitch niggas stressin on the things you can't change! #step.it.up!

Ima drop the top when I buy me a fast car, kid nap the squad ***** for some ransom!! - UNDERSTAND ME -

If you let a female come in the way of you an yo niggas relationship you either got trust issues or should have been cut a ***** off!

Loudest ***** in the room usually the brokest!!!!

[ENluv12]

Just wow.

[DaytonaDave]

My 16 year old white cousin-in-law.

And to think he will probably be spawning a few fine new additions to your family soon. That family tree needs pruning quick!

[nathanfairchild]

My 16 year old white cousin-in-law.



My nephew my son *****! Fuck you kno bout bein grown and takin care of grown man shit!

If any ***** no me, he no I don't believe in excuses or complaints. I believe that you deal with shit how it come, good shit, bad shit, real life shit, or even death! So for you bitch niggas stressin on the things you can't change! #step.it.up!

Ima drop the top when I buy me a fast car, kid nap the squad ***** for some ransom!! - UNDERSTAND ME -

If you let a female come in the way of you an yo niggas relationship you either got trust issues or should have been cut a ***** off!

Loudest ***** in the room usually the brokest!!!!

he'll straighten up the day he says something like this in front of a black guy and gets his teeth knocked in.

[Neighborhood Creep]

The problem is all his little black friends give him a pass because he has a black nephew I assume. They call him "niggga" as well. Christ. I am just happy I don't share the same last name and that that part of the family isn't in the loop as far as family holidays go.

[DaytonaDave]

And you are definitely lucky with the "in-law" part. You have a rock-solid reason for the divorce.

[Neighborhood Creep]

And you are definitely lucky with the "in-law" part. You have a rock-solid reason for the divorce.

He's related through my cousin's marriage. Not intermediate, so would that even be an in-law? Hmmm

My father's brother had 2 kids through a marriage. They divorced and she then had a third child with her newer husband. I guess in a sense he isn't related to me but it somewhat feels like he's a cousin due to the fact that he is the younger brother of my 2 first cousins.

[unit300021]

I went through a phase where I dropped the N-Bomb in conversation. Then I realized how stupid it was for a white guy to be saying it. Plus one of my best friends who is black wouldn't say anything to me about it but would give these looks that pretty much said shut the fuck up. Maybe that should be in the confession thread though. But maybe it's just a phase for your cousin also?

[roboticwaltz]

So this happened:

[Neighborhood Creep]

My city's mayor:
So, I have the house to myself today. How did I spend it? Five hours of power cleaning the house and revisiting my Pavement record collection. That's how much I love my wife.... and the music of Stephen Malkmus.
Next up? Folding laundry and Neutral Milk Hotel.

[VigoTheCarpathian]

I went through a phase where I dropped the N-Bomb in conversation. Then I realized how stupid it was for a white guy to be saying it. Plus one of my best friends who is black wouldn't say anything to me about it but would give these looks that pretty much said shut the fuck up. Maybe that should be in the confession thread though. But maybe it's just a phase for your cousin also?

When I was in high school, back in the 90's, a lot of the kids were really into hip hop culture, and I had a group of friends who thought they were pretty hard: they wore tommy hilfiger, bumped the tupac, rolled in a big crew, one of them had a Range Rover: real suburban gangsters I tell ya.

One evening they had the bright idea of going down to Florantine Gardens to get some bitches. For those who are too young: Florntine Gardens was a two story all age hip hop/house club in Hollywood which sold pizza and attracted a mostly very young African American and Latino crowd. That evening, in the parking lot, I watched my friends get the living shit beat out of them. That summer they all started listening to Modest Mouse. True story.

[getbetter]

Wow tonight was insanity! Lmfao!! Saw a bitch get supetmanned knocked out! Titties poppin out had to breAk up an insane brawl.. Tonight has been absolutely cray madness

This was posted 23 minutes ago from a girl i went to High School with..

[RotationSlimWang]

Isn't there a joke you should not be comprehending somewhere?

[algunz]

Amun!!! RA em hotep, ta em hotep.

Can somebody translate for me?

[PlayaDelWes]

The obvious successive post would be "Paging Ron"

[welgo800]

I'm in love with Seattle!!

WHAt!?

[PineapplePete]

wow it's all still here. you're all here.

[chairmenmeow47]

hi pete!

[Hannahrain]

This is from the Portland Mercury's anonymous letters blog, not a facebook. But.

All My Scars Are On The InsidePOSTED BY ANONYMOUS ON WED, FEB 6, 2013 AT 4:26 PM

Hey there, I noticed you’ve been scanning my body for various marks, welts, bruises, cuts, and scars. You’ve convinced yourself they’re products up an abusive partner. The presumptuous stance you’ve taken leads you to believe I’m a victim; but your concern is really a cloak of your own personal fantasies. The sympathy you thought you had is just your apathy for the scars that shine inside of me. All of which usually project when I have nothing to say or a tiny bit too much. Those scars are the opiate of my livelihood. Just a little reminder that I’m not in need of your help, so quit your assumptions!
Who or what I engage in, or with is none of your pea on brain’s concern. But here’s a sliver for your pocket to cherish for a later date of voyeuristic perversions; I've been abstinent for an extended period and I’m fulfilled with my own means of asexuality. BDSM is enjoyed through and throughout alone (some of the most intense, pleasurable to date)! Admittedly all those marks are really from less interesting sources and not from my personal asphyxiation kink!

Come clean that you’re a stalker and predator who views themselves as an upstanding fellow human; you and I know that you aren’t. Stay away from me, and keep your sympathy, apathy and prying eyes, hands, feet, and whatever else you feel the need to direct towards me to yourself!

[Hannahrain]

NONE OF YOUR PEA ON BRAIN'S CONCERN.

[amyzzz]

Peon brain? Pee on brain? Pea brain?

[xanman86]

This was posted 23 minutes ago from a girl i went to High School with..

Not sure if "supetmanned knocked out" or the random capital a in "breAk" is my favorite part lol