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Thread: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

  1. #1
    Coachella Junkie BlackSwan's Avatar
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    Default Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Seriously, this is how it starts, but I am ready to take preemptive action since the dead bodies will start turning into zombies shortly.

    Town Sealed Off After Deadly Outbreak

    BEIJING (Aug. 3)- A second man has died of pneumonic plague in northwest China, in an outbreak that prompted authorities to lock down a town where about a dozen people were infected with the highly contagious deadly lung disease, a state news agency said.

    The World Health Organization office in China said it was in close contact with Chinese health authorities and that measures taken so far to treat and quarantine sickened people were appropriate.

    The man who died Sunday was identified only as 37-year-old Danzin from Ziketan, the stricken town in Qinghai province, the official Xinhua News Agency said.

    Danzin was a neighbor of the first person who died, a 32-year-old herdsman whose name was not given. Another 10 people, mostly relatives of the first deceased man, were infected and undergoing isolated treatment in hospital, Xinhua said in a report late Sunday.

    The town of 10,000 people has been sealed off and a team of experts was sent to the area, the local health bureau said Sunday, warning that anyone with a cough or fever who visited the town since mid-July should seek treatment at a hospital.

    A food seller surnamed Han at the Crystal Alley Market in Ziketan said authorities have said homes and shops should be disinfected and residents should wear masks when they go out. He said 80 percent of shops in the town were closed and prices of disinfectants and some vegetables have tripled.

    "People are so scared. There are few people on the streets," Han said by telephone. "There are police guarding the quarantine center at the township hospital but not on the streets."

    The situation in Ziketan was stable, said an official surnamed Wang at the local disease control center, who added the measures taken were "scientific, orderly, effective and in accordance with the law."

    A woman who lives in Ziketan, who refused to give her name, said county officials distributed flyers and made TV and radio announcements on how to prevent infection. The woman contacted by phone said police checkpoints were set up in a 17-mile (28-kilometer) radius around Ziketan and residents were not allowed to leave.

    Pneumonic plague is spread through the air and can be passed from person to person through coughing, according to the World Health Organization. It is caused by the same bacteria that occurs in bubonic plague — the Black Death that killed an estimated 25 million people in Europe during the Middle Ages.

    Bubonic plague is usually transmitted by flea bite and can be treated with antibiotics if diagnosed early. Pneumonic plague is one of the deadliest infectious diseases, capable of killing humans within 24 hours of infection, according to the WHO.

    People infected with pneumonic plague must be given antibiotics within 24 hours of first showing symptoms, while people who have had direct contact with those infected can protect themselves by taking antibiotics for seven days, according to the Web site of the U.S. Centers for Disease Control.
    The WHO's spokeswoman in China, Vivian Tan, said China reported the first death and 11 other cases to the organization on Saturday.

    "In cases like this, we encourage the authorities to identify cases, to investigate any suspicious symptoms among close contacts and to treat confirmed cases as soon as possible. So far, they have done exactly that, so at this point we don't have any additional advice," Tan said.
    Who is ready to sign up to be on the first team that goes in to kill the zombies? I'm ready to lead, but I will need two white people (preferrably one very attractive woman), an Asian scientist, and one black guy. PM me with an essay on what qualifies you to kill zombies, and I will get back to you post-haste.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Quote Originally Posted by RotationSlimWang View Post
    Say goodbye to that acid, Greg.

  3. #3
    Member disgustipated's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    No zombie is safe from Chicago Ted.
    Quote Originally Posted by Young blood View Post
    Stop being a pussy should be the answer to all of life's problems. It has worked for me so far.

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    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Doesn't the black guy need to be a martial arts badass with an assemblage of automatic weapons? I don't mean to invade your zombie party, but you should be clearer on the roles here.
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

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    Banned marooko's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    the asian guy will be the martial arts badass. the black guy will have the guns.

    almost forgot, hope this kills millions. around the world.

  6. #6
    Coachella Junkie BlackSwan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Quote Originally Posted by captncrzy View Post
    Doesn't the black guy need to be a martial arts badass with an assemblage of automatic weapons? I don't mean to invade your zombie party, but you should be clearer on the roles here.
    The black guy should be funny, and possibly speak some sort of jive. I also suggest he gets his affairs in order, because he will be the first one sent off to investigate a weird noise.

  7. #7
    old school zenidogx's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    if no black guy volunteers, i'll gladly take over. i wouldn't mind being the first to die if it means getting away with wearing blackface.
    Quote Originally Posted by KungFuJoe View Post
    Here is all I'll say about borders ... the Los Angeles Angels.

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    Chest Rockwell Gribbz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    I think you also need a Bill Paxton type individual ala Aliens.

    Game over man, game over!
    Quote Originally Posted by nathanfairchild View Post
    Has Pitchfork revealed it's top 200 covers by Arcade Fire yet?

    DJ Shadow/Cut Chemist - 9/18 - Moody Theater
    Tycho - 9/20 - Emo's
    Bonobo (DJ set) - 10/10 - The Mohawk
    Screaming Females - 10/23 - Red 7
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    Banned marooko's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    you guys must not have watched any zombie movies. the hot chick is gonna die first. no way in hell the tough black dude is gonna take the first order to go check out the first noise. even though he signs on, he isnt gonna like any of you for the first death or two, you think he's gonna listen? sheesh.

  10. #10
    Coachella Junkie Blinken's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    I will sign on to be the fat white guy who survives much longer than he should. I will make sarcastic remarks shotting down everyone elses plan while just sitting on my fat ass, occasionally blasting a zombies head off with a shotgun.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    The Smiths - makes me think bin Laden has a point.

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    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    You get zombied in the last act though, Blinken, and nobody's sorry about re-killing you.

  12. #12
    Coachella Junkie Blinken's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    I am ok with that, but I will take at least one survivor down with me.
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    The Smiths - makes me think bin Laden has a point.

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    Stage Manager captncrzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Quote Originally Posted by Blinken View Post
    I will sign on to be the fat white guy who survives much longer than he should. I will make sarcastic remarks shotting down everyone elses plan while just sitting on my fat ass, occasionally blasting a zombies head off with a shotgun.
    This is very unrealistic.
    Odi profanum vulgus et arceo. I hate the unholy rabble and keep them away - Horace.
    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    Arcade FIre are a bunch of dicks, Deadmau5 is a dick, bands are dicks, David Bowie sucks dicks, Daft Punk is two human buttholes with semen for brains (that was loaded into a butthole from a dick that grew out of their moms), we're all dicks that fucked our moms assholes, God is going to put a giant dick down and fuck our mouths

  14. #14
    old school TickleMeElmo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.


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    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    I've already got mine.


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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Quote Originally Posted by MissingPerson View Post
    I've already got mine.

    I think you'll need more than just a hammer.
    Quote Originally Posted by nathanfairchild View Post
    Has Pitchfork revealed it's top 200 covers by Arcade Fire yet?

    DJ Shadow/Cut Chemist - 9/18 - Moody Theater
    Tycho - 9/20 - Emo's
    Bonobo (DJ set) - 10/10 - The Mohawk
    Screaming Females - 10/23 - Red 7
    Caribou & Jessy Lanza - 11/23 - The Mohawk

  17. #17
    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Pussies need more than a hammer.

  18. #18
    Chest Rockwell Gribbz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Or people who don't want to die foolishly.
    Quote Originally Posted by nathanfairchild View Post
    Has Pitchfork revealed it's top 200 covers by Arcade Fire yet?

    DJ Shadow/Cut Chemist - 9/18 - Moody Theater
    Tycho - 9/20 - Emo's
    Bonobo (DJ set) - 10/10 - The Mohawk
    Screaming Females - 10/23 - Red 7
    Caribou & Jessy Lanza - 11/23 - The Mohawk

  19. #19
    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Hammers don't need reloading at the last minute.

    You'll see. You'll all see.

  20. #20
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Guns can be used as effective clubs both before and after the bullets run out so they're useful over a variety of ranges. Obviously a superior choice.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  21. #21
    Chest Rockwell Gribbz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Quote Originally Posted by MissingPerson View Post
    Hammers don't need reloading at the last minute.

    You'll see. You'll all see.
    This is true. A hammer would be a nice weapon in a one on one situation. However, it might make things more difficult when multiple zombies are are attacking from different angles.

    Also, if you cannot reload in time you can use your rifle as a blunt instrument.
    Quote Originally Posted by nathanfairchild View Post
    Has Pitchfork revealed it's top 200 covers by Arcade Fire yet?

    DJ Shadow/Cut Chemist - 9/18 - Moody Theater
    Tycho - 9/20 - Emo's
    Bonobo (DJ set) - 10/10 - The Mohawk
    Screaming Females - 10/23 - Red 7
    Caribou & Jessy Lanza - 11/23 - The Mohawk

  22. #22
    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Can't build a window barricade with a gun.

    Well you can, but you'll probably accidentally shoot yourself in the eye or something.

  23. #23
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Just because you're hampered doesn't mean we all are.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  24. #24
    Chest Rockwell Gribbz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    I'm not opposed to having a hammer. I think you were insinuating that's ALL you need correct?
    Quote Originally Posted by nathanfairchild View Post
    Has Pitchfork revealed it's top 200 covers by Arcade Fire yet?

    DJ Shadow/Cut Chemist - 9/18 - Moody Theater
    Tycho - 9/20 - Emo's
    Bonobo (DJ set) - 10/10 - The Mohawk
    Screaming Females - 10/23 - Red 7
    Caribou & Jessy Lanza - 11/23 - The Mohawk

  25. #25
    old school whynotsmile99's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    i'd much rather have a pitchfork than a hammer
    Then I will hold you down and spit her percolations all over you until you're as greasy as the day she regrets pushing your big fat ass out her big fat cunt.

  26. #26
    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Yes. It's all I need. Anything else is just extravagance, really.

  27. #27
    old school emtgreg's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    If MissingPerson wants a hammer, I will gladly take her Egyptian Maadi Model 47.

    Although, I will have my own Hammer. And during close quarters combat, I will randomly yell STOP, HAMMER TIME!!.
    "It began as a mistake" - Charles Bukowski

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  28. #28
    Coachella Junkie BlackSwan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    I like MP's confidence in her ability to dispatch zombies only wielding a hammer. You would most certainly have a spot on the team. I think my ideal weapon would be a shotgun. I could do plenty of hammering with it once I ran out of ammo.

  29. #29
    Coachella Junkie MissingPerson's Avatar
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.

    Quote Originally Posted by emtgreg View Post
    If MissingPerson wants a hammer, I will gladly take her Egyptian Maadi Model 47.

    Although, I will have my own Hammer. And during close quarters combat, I will randomly yell STOP, HAMMER TIME!!.
    My God, I can't believe I didn't see this set-up happen.

    Well, I'm glad to have given the assist, at least.

  30. #30
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    Default Re: Zombie Apocalypse Starts In China.



    +

    X10000

    +



    =
    Safety
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    Yea I think a lot of men think they are bad ass, but a 12 year old with a AK can take me out I know ...... cr****

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