First Two Cases of Swine Flu Confirmed on Message Board

[PierogiHead]

It looks like it's finally heading our way...

Health officials have confirmed the first two cases of swine flu on the Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival Message Board. Usernames Malcolm Jamal Awesome and HandBanana were admitted to local hospitals around 12pm today after both reported symptoms of the mysterious illness. It is said the two may have contracted the flu after sharing a passionate night inside a tent together without using protection at the Coachella festival two weeks ago, then making a trip to Mexico, where they vacationed among the country's nude beach resorts.

At the time that this report was published, health officials said the two were listed in serious condition as doctors worked to improve their symptoms. They are hoping that by removing HandBanana and Malcolm Jamal Awesome's faces, the alleviation of "asshole" from their bodies will help cure the two man-children.

[Alchemy]

Dave Wang isn't going to like this one bit.

[marooko]

im beginning to grow a fondness of this hatred for you.

[PierogiHead]

Say it to my face, you won't!!!

[fatbastard]

Good thing I didn't get one of those frozen lemonaides.

[marooko]

Say it to my face, you won't!!!

relax yoda.

[vogina]

When the moon hits the sky like a big pizza pie its..

[Still-ill]

Good thing I didn't get one of those frozen lemonaides.

shit...

[TomAz]

I have looked at this thread like three or four times now and it's not getting any better no matter how many times I try.

[marooko]

its better now, because you're here.

[HandBanana]

MJA was a firm (some would say "harsh") but fair lover.

He was gentle as I bled, but intense and fiery when I was healed.

[gaypalmsprings]

Here's a pic of HandBanana on his way to the CDC in DC.

[TomAz]

HandBanana is dumb, everyone knows the CDC is in Atlanta.

[JustSteve]

Good thing I didn't get one of those frozen lemonaides.

you mean frozen lemonAIDZ

[HandBanana]

HandBanana is dumb, everyone knows the CDC is in Atlanta.

You try reading the Departures board in that fucking suit.

[PierogiHead]

HandBanana, your lungs look like octopuss legs.

[Blinken]

Why the fuck are you still here???????

[PierogiHead]

Shut up Blinken, this doesn't involve you. This is personal.

[malcolmjamalawesome]

When do the ha ha's commence

[Gribbz]

Wow, that thread could not have been deleted fast enough.

[malcolmjamalawesome]

The fucked up part? Feather deleted it with her mind.



I warned all of you.

[Gribbz]

Some retarded pieorgihead thread about feather and sars.

[PierogiHead]

Oh so because shes a girl the thread gets deleted? That's dumb. Who's she fucking on here, PsychicFriend AND HandBanana?

[MissingPerson]

The fucked up part? Feather deleted it with her mind.



I warned all of you.

...

Awesome.

[chairmenmeow47]

[Mr. Dylanja]

When the moon hits the sky like a big pizza pie its..

What set was this played at?

[PierogiHead]

ivy, are you the fucked up looking girl with the weird ass red orange dread braids or whatever? If so, please stop ruining our world. kthxbye.

[malcolmjamalawesome]

This is all going to end very badly.

You've all mistaken Feather for a harmless rave pixie.

But inside of her burns the anger and fury of a thousand Daft Punk pyramids multiplied by a zillion MSTRKRFT holograms.

May God have mercy on all of your souls, though I fear it is too late for us now.

[chairmenmeow47]

weird, i thought i heard some douchebag talking, but then i realized he was whining recently about what a bleeding vag he was and he said he was leaving so it couldn't be him, weird...

[MissingPerson]

ivy, are you the fucked up looking girl with the weird ass red orange dread braids or whatever? If so, please stop ruining our world. kthxbye.

Okay. This isn't just trolling. I think we're actually witnessing a mental episode unfolding, right in real time.