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Thread: Ask Caco for relationship advice

  1. #151
    Coachella Junkie schoolofruckus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by caco0283 View Post
    Who am i kidding, i'm not going to a titty bar.
    After all that madness, THIS is the only part of it that I'm certain of. Although you almost had us with that bulletproof Chewbacca defense.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    The childless 20-something year olds on the board who find a 50 something year old man fucking teenage prostitutes distasteful will probably change the hum of their tune once they produce babies, definitely. That's the missing link.

  2. #152

    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    I don't understand why you are changing the lyrics to the Star Spangled Banner. On a side note, if that picture is of the two guys I wouldn't be surprised if they were have relations. They look like a cute couple.

  3. #153
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by jjphotos420 View Post
    I don't understand why you are changing the lyrics to the Star Spangled Banner. On a side note, if that picture is of the two guys I wouldn't be surprised if they were have relations. They look like a cute couple.
    This alias is like ten times better than sillygrl.

  4. #154

    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Courtney View Post
    This alias is like ten times better than sillygrl.
    Funny thing is I don't know sillygrl and I'm not an alias. Ask Bug he's the only person that got to know me.

  5. #155
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    ok.

  6. #156
    Member SillyGrl<3's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    WTF???
























































































    LOL <3

  7. #157
    MENACING Courtney's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    LOL JK I STILL LOVE YOU SILLYGRL <3 <3

  8. #158
    Member SillyGrl<3's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    <3 awwwwwwwwwwww LOL

  9. #159
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by jjphotos420 View Post
    I don't understand why you are changing the lyrics to the Star Spangled Banner. On a side note, if that picture is of the two guys I wouldn't be surprised if they were have relations. They look like a cute couple.
    Its an inside joke....I don't know how I feel about me and Greg as a couple
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  10. #160
    Coachella Junkie schoolofruckus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by jjphotos420 View Post
    I don't understand why you are changing the lyrics to the Star Spangled Banner. On a side note, if that picture is of the two guys I wouldn't be surprised if they were have relations. They look like a cute couple.
    He changed it because he's an illegal alien and he doesn't know the actual lyrics.....or was that not spelled out explicitly enough?
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    The childless 20-something year olds on the board who find a 50 something year old man fucking teenage prostitutes distasteful will probably change the hum of their tune once they produce babies, definitely. That's the missing link.

  11. #161
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    He changed it because he's an illegal alien and he doesn't know the actual lyrics.....or was that not spelled out explicitly enough?

    listen bitch don't make me kill your white ass....i fucking hate you.... i didn't want to tell everyone this but gabe tried to rape me when i crashed at his place before i caught me plane back to florida......hes the real homo.


    also when i get sent back and have to buy my freedom at least i can borrow 5grand from you....i knew that promotion was good for me too
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  12. #162
    Coachella Junkie schoolofruckus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    That's true. I could try to hire you in my office now so you can get your visa.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    The childless 20-something year olds on the board who find a 50 something year old man fucking teenage prostitutes distasteful will probably change the hum of their tune once they produce babies, definitely. That's the missing link.

  13. #163
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    anybody else notice he didnt deny the attempt of rape??? whats with you board members trying to get on my shit
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  14. #164
    Coachella Junkie schoolofruckus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Ronnie, you fuck guys? It's okay if you fuck guys, I got friends that fuck guys.......in jail.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    The childless 20-something year olds on the board who find a 50 something year old man fucking teenage prostitutes distasteful will probably change the hum of their tune once they produce babies, definitely. That's the missing link.

  15. #165
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    still no denial
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  16. #166

    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    You boys need a woman.

  17. #167
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    As I was reading my book "Real Questions, Real Answers about Sex: The Complete Guide to Intimacy as God Intended" by Melissa McBurney I started to think that it was full of shit. I decided to rant about my thoughts on some things the book brought up.

    The book did a study in Marble, Colorado on how many couples are informed about sex and are having problems sexually. They make a big deal in the book that 46% struggle with sex. Well listen my fellow Christians, put the fucking bible down and think about this. YOU ARE IN MARBLE, COLORADO. WHERE THE FUCK IS MARBLE, COLORADO??? It sounds like some hick ass town full of Baptist that don't even like to dance. Of course they are going to have problems in the bed. Baptist women don't suck dick. The only fish a Baptist guy eats comes from a lake. Sure they have a lake called Beaver Lake in Marble, but the men don't even eat the fish from that lake cos it may cause problems with God. They just throw the fish back.

    Most women don't realize testosterone creates a physiological drive in their husbands that demands expression ever few days. Without that kind of hormonal insistence, women have less physical drive for sexual release. Rather, what they crave is the relational closeness that leads to sexual intimacy
    Every time I watch men filled with ego and testosterone on ESPN I want to jump on top of every girl at the bar and make her scream my name until all she can scream is "i cant breath let me get some air...i cant breath let me get some air air air i i i cant breath" fucking idiot, Melissa McBurney, testosterone doesn't make me want to blow a load. God's work of art on a woman's body makes me want to blow the bass from my tuba all over her face.

    Many husbands assume their wives will get aroused and reach climax as quickly as they do. But most women are only in the early arousal stage when their husbands acheive orgasm. So a wife feels cheated when her husband falls asleep just when she's getting interested. And a husband feels inadequate as a lover because he has failed to bring his wife to orgasm.
    Melissa McBurney you sound like Amy, by that I mean you are really a woman that loves the flesh between a woman's legs. Its ok so do I. But listen hear you closet lesibian, who doesn't like dick. Most men don't assume women bust what I like to call A NUT. Guys have off nights. OK? Sort of like the weather. You want to go snowboarding with your friends, you want some fresh powder the next morning but you don't know what you are going to get till the moment. It may pour the rich whiteness all over the place, or it might be a disappointment. Most of the time its womens fault anyways, all they do is lay there and scream "ah ah ah ee eh eh ee ah ah" SHUT THE FUCK UP AND BUST A NUT. All that screaming is just going to make my head hurt. Instead of exerting all your engergy by screaming you need to hold that energy in and build up a pressure inside your body and trust me, Krakatoa wont have nutting on you baby. You will explode and send cosmic sexual energy into the houses around you and they will get all horny from it. Ever sit there bored, watching ESPN with your hubby?? Then out of nowhere you get horny?? Well that's cos your neighbors wife shut the fuck up and busted a nut.
    Also men dont feel inadequate when they don't get their women to pop one. Want to know what I feel??? Nothing, cos my ass is satified and asleep. I always keep a carrot around for my ladies. I call it the R.T.M.Y.C. That stands for the Ronnie That Makes You Cum. It even has bushy hair on top so it looks like me. You can get as freaky as you want with RTMYC. Place him on the chair and ride him, put him between your boobs, bend over and stick it in the dark hole. Take him in the shower and have a three-some with Miss Shower Head. Satisfy yourself when your man doesn't. You don't hear me bitch when I'm not getting laid everyday. I just jack the straw. I school my palms in the art of self-ruckus. I rue my day. Ya, blow a load I just did about 3 times during this rant. See? I find ways to make it happen.

    Well thats all for now on my rant about this book...i hope you enjoyed it
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  18. #168
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    So in summation, according to Melissa, most women don't realize men typically want to have sex more often than them, and most men don't realize women do not get off as easily as a man. And you have the gall to question her expertise? You ought to be ashamed of yourself, I've learned so much just by reading those excerpts.

  19. #169
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    goodtimes.

  20. #170
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    When are you going to write a book Ronnie?

  21. #171
    Peaceful Oasis TomAz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by PotVsKtl View Post
    So in summation, according to Melissa, most women don't realize men typically want to have sex more often than them, and most men don't realize women do not get off as easily as a man. And you have the gall to question her expertise? You ought to be ashamed of yourself, I've learned so much just by reading those excerpts.
    it's actually surprising the people of Marble, Colorado have figured out how to propagate at all.
    Quote Originally Posted by efrain44 View Post
    Anyone know who the guy in the Cardinals jersey is? I've seen him in pictures on the board and I thought I saw him this year.

  22. #172
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by PotVsKtl View Post
    So in summation, according to Melissa, most women don't realize men typically want to have sex more often than them, and most men don't realize women do not get off as easily as a man. And you have the gall to question her expertise? You ought to be ashamed of yourself, I've learned so much just by reading those excerpts.

    Pot I'm glad you learned from Amy #2. Maybe deep down inside I want to be her, I want to be a man hating lesbian
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  23. #173
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by J~$$$ View Post
    When are you going to write a book Ronnie?

    I cant write a book, do you know how much my editor will hate me?? Plus I have no inspiration
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  24. #174
    Coachella Junkie fatbastard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Whiskey Sour

    2 oz blended whiskey
    Juice of 1/2 lemon
    1/2 tsp powdered sugar
    1 cherry
    1/2 slice lemon

    Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.

  25. #175
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Marble is a town in Gunnison County, Colorado, United States. The population was 105 at the 2000 census.

    Thats slim pickings.

  26. #176
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by J~$$$ View Post
    Marble is a town in Gunnison County, Colorado, United States. The population was 105 at the 2000 census.

    Thats slim pickings.
    thats awesome, i think i should send my rant to Melissa
    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  27. #177
    old school mob roulette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    I swear to Christ I was just getting ready to bump this. Well done Ronnie.

  28. #178
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    I visit the quarry in marble Marble, CO quite often for business. The mountain people there all start to look the same, flannel "butch"

  29. #179
    old school caco0283's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    Your lady's also in for drugs, right? Corinna's guy is in for murder and mine's in for a spree of home invasions. I think you're probably good.


    Quote Originally Posted by Drinkey McDrinkerstein View Post
    I'm pretty sure Ronnie painted that on her, with his dick.

  30. #180
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    Default Re: Ask Caco for relationship advice

    No wonder coitus is such a baffling ordeal.

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