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Thread: stuff white people like

  1. #1
    Member arbouler's Avatar
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    Default stuff white people like

    http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/

    it's so true...


    So when white people go to concerts at smaller venues, what to do they do? They stand still! This is an important part of white concert going as it enables you to focus on the music, and it will prevent drawing excess attention to you. Remember, at a concert everyone is watching you just waiting for you to try to start dancing. Then they will make fun of you.
    The most horrific recent example is Trucker hats, that shockingly went from mainstream in the 80s to Ironic in the early 2000s back to mainstream, at which point they are no longer rare or unique. Once something reaches this stage, irony cannot be restored for 10 years.
    But BE WARNED, talking about Indie Music with white people is perhaps the most dangerous subject you touch upon. One false move and you will lose their respect and admiration forever. Here are some general rules

    * Bands that have had their songs in an Apple ad are still marginally acceptable
    * Bands that have had their songs in ads for other companies are not acceptable
    * If you mention a band you like and the other person has heard of them, you lose. They own you. It is essential that you like the most obscure music possible.

    Remember, popular artists can turn unpopular in a heartbeat (Ryan Adams, Bright Eyes, The Strokes), so you would be best to stick to the following statements: “I love the Arcade Fire,” “I still think the Montreal scene is the best in the world,” “I would die without Stereogum or Fluxblog“* and “Joanna Newsom is maybe the most original artist today.”
    Counting the number of black friends is then clearly a divine imperative. The number of black friends white people possess also illustrates their comfort with black culture. Here’s a handy guide to the number system:

    1—The white novice. This black friend is the gateway to helping white people understand gang signs and Vietnamese beauty supply stores. This black friend is probably the only black friend for many white people and when they all hang out (because white people hang out) they bring their “mutual” black friend with them.

    2—The white black club-goer. Two black friends serve as bodyguards when white people go to black clubs to see how exactly one “pops, drops and locks” it.

    3 -4—The white BET-er. See Justin Timberlake/ Robin Thicke/ Jon B for more information. For old school reference, see Michael McDonald.

    5 and up—Impossible.

  2. #2
    Dick Nicewonger kreutz2112's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Mustaches are the new trucker hats.
    RAPE STOVE

    white power?!

  3. #3
    Member drugks Gillespie's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    they also love gated communities.

  4. #4
    Member All That I Am's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    They forgot casserole.
    I work in a grocery store and I hear countless casserole recipes from old white ladies. Every time its the same thing: The first item can be any item you can imagine, then you saute onions add them to the first item, beat two eggs and add a half a cup of milk then crush cornflakes and put them on that first item and the onions, pour the milk and eggs over that and top with chees, then bake until browned.
    I swear i've heard it all from Cottage cheese casserole to eggplant casserole.
    I miss Bill Hicks.

  5. #5
    old school gmoneyak's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like




    You can't forget their fondness for mocha frappuccinos either..


    Disclosure - October 12 - Reno, NV.
    Treasure Island Music Festival - October 19 - San Francisco, CA.
    Portugal, The Man - October 22 - Reno, NV.
    Cut Copy - October 31 - Reno, NV.
    Phoenix w/ Alt-J - December 5 - Reno, NV.

    COACHELLA '07, '08, '09, '11, '13

  6. #6

    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Man, this site is fucking funny. lol

  7. #7
    Banned thelastgreatman's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Fatboy Slim.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  8. #8
    No Clownery full on idle's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Portishead


    Roger Waters



    Grand Ole Party

  9. #9
    Banned thelastgreatman's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Having a never-ending rotation of avatars of black people.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  10. #10
    Banned thelastgreatman's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Also, not being as funny as me. At least, the gingers seem to love that.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  11. #11
    Coachella Junkie Boourns's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Fact: white people smell like wet dog and french fries.
    8/20 SISU and Tanlines @ Sayers Club, 8/21 The Zombies @ Santa Monica Pier, 8/23-24 FYF Fest, 9/10 Swans @ Roxy, 9/18 Neutral Milk Hotel & Daniel Johnston @ Hollywood Bowl, 9/19 Tokimonsta @ El Rey, 9/30 Cibo Matto @ the Roxy, 10/3-4 Desert Stars, 10/9 Zola Jesus @ El Rey, 10/16 Massive Attack @ Greek Theater, 10/22-25 CMJ, 10/26 Asobi Seksu & Slowdive @ Royale

  12. #12
    Banned thelastgreatman's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    White people sig Kitt Kat.

    In fact, Kitt Kat is probably a good combination of everything that's wrong with white people.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  13. #13
    business time tessalasset's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Frank are you white?


    I related to that site so much it's almost scary. I'm gonna have to bookmark it to finish reading tomorrow.


    Quote Originally Posted by Ardentbiscuit View Post
    This is the equivalent of musical water boarding.

  14. #14
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    I'm not white enough I guess. I always dance at concerts.
    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    Because fucking millenials that's what

  15. #15
    No Clownery full on idle's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Quote Originally Posted by thelastgreatman View Post
    Also, not being as funny as me. At least, the gingers seem to love that.
    why I eyes ya

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    I'm not white enough I guess.
    you're doing fine

  16. #16
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    I'm not white enough I guess. I always dance at concerts.
    they made a special note that this doesn't apply while on ecstacy...
    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case.

  17. #17
    Member All That I Am's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    White people also like to throw in the occasional word or phrase of french into a sentence. Spoken with a heavy french accent, I might add
    But, when they say things in spanish they anglofy it to the point where it becomes unidentifiable.
    I.E.
    Chile Relleno becomes Chilly Reyana
    Carne Asade becomes Carny Estrada
    Quesadilla becomes Kay Saw Deehaw
    I miss Bill Hicks.

  18. #18
    The Encyclopedia bmack86's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    "Peggy, it's not a Mah-Gah RRRRRRRita, its a mar-gar-eeeta."
    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    Remember Hitler? I don't but here we are again .. cr****

  19. #19
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    I think maybe I'm only half-white.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  20. #20
    Young blood
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    money and blow.

  21. #21
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    Quote Originally Posted by Young blood View Post
    money and blow.
    ha, funny you say that...on first glance at the thread title i swore it said "white stuff people like"
    I'm a reasonable man, get off my case.

  22. #22
    Young blood
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    obama.

  23. #23
    Young blood
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    Default Re: stuff white people like


  24. #24
    Young blood
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    like to flip off the camera.

  25. #25
    Dick Nicewonger kreutz2112's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    RAPE STOVE

    white power?!

  26. #26
    Young blood
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    Default Re: stuff white people like


  27. #27
    Dick Nicewonger kreutz2112's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    are asians white people too? They have white skin...
    RAPE STOVE

    white power?!

  28. #28
    Young blood
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    Default Re: stuff white people like



    r mostly crazy.

  29. #29
    Dick Nicewonger kreutz2112's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    RAPE STOVE

    white power?!

  30. #30
    Coachella Junkie Boourns's Avatar
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    Default Re: stuff white people like

    This should be called "stuff relatively affluent/younger/liberal/educated/etc white people like"

    I can guarantee that more white people actually shop at Wal-Mart than pity Wal-Mart shoppers.
    8/20 SISU and Tanlines @ Sayers Club, 8/21 The Zombies @ Santa Monica Pier, 8/23-24 FYF Fest, 9/10 Swans @ Roxy, 9/18 Neutral Milk Hotel & Daniel Johnston @ Hollywood Bowl, 9/19 Tokimonsta @ El Rey, 9/30 Cibo Matto @ the Roxy, 10/3-4 Desert Stars, 10/9 Zola Jesus @ El Rey, 10/16 Massive Attack @ Greek Theater, 10/22-25 CMJ, 10/26 Asobi Seksu & Slowdive @ Royale

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