please share with us the latest news on the post-merger operational integration at US Airways. Do East and West still hate each other?
Jen, (this is my stock question...kinda)
Please pick your Coachella based on personal preference and not ticket sales.
3 headliners and 6 subs please.
2) I have given birth. There is no worse pain. If you boys want to know what it feels like, imagine what it would feel like to poop out a Honeydew melon. It's basically the same thing. The whole experience isn't exactly fun; the enema, the puking, the epesiotomy, the epidural, the stitches after. But the actual birthing is the worst.
Say there - your biggest regret of the last five years?
i think i might know the answers, but out of the Jonas Brothers, which would you fuck, marry and kill?
If you could advise one couple you know to separate, who would it be and why?
I don't feel bad for them because they're adults and they're the ones that have put themselves in the situation, but I keep thinking that the divorce that they eventually go through is going to be bombastic. I just want to scream at them "What the fuck are you doing? You're both so obviously miserable! Why are you even bothering?" I think Kristina is too possessive to let go and Mike is doing what he thinks he should be.
bombastic . . . what a great word.
When are you and Rick coming to SF?
a) He treats me like a princess but stands up to me and doesn't put up with my crazy bullshit. Sure, he has his problems, but they aren't the kind that make him mean, insensitive, or an asshole. We have our run-ins, but they're not major ones; I suspect every man has listening issues.
b) Hands down, he's the smartest person I know. Looking back, it seems like most of the people I dated were either stupid or irresponsible losers. I think I was attracted to the fact that they were attracted to me rather than who they really were. Rick has ambition and goals, yet he's responsible with them. I know I don't have to worry about him going out and buying a $50,000 truck behind my back. I know I don't have to worry about him at all, in fact.
c) We like the same things and have similar interests, but we're comfortable (even happy) to be apart at times. We like spending time together, but we don't always need to be together.
d) My parents like him; they don't like anybody.
I suspect your TMI comment is regarding wiener size. It's above average, and that's all I'll say about that.
When was the last time you really enjoyed a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?
July 21- Soundgarden- Bill Graham Civic Auditorium
July 30- Rage Against the Machine/Muse- LA Coliseum
Oct 21- Portishead- Berkeley Greek
Nov 18- Pixies- Fox Theater Bakersfield
My, what a pleasant suprise! Ms. Congeniality!
I just happen to have a questionnaire I designed just for you!
Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.
I'm not sure of the rules; is it ok if I ignore the churro questionnaire? I like churros, but I'm not sure I need to answer seven questions about them.
Edit: 6 questions. There's some misnumbering going on in there.
What is your favorite piece of music related visual art? Could be a music video or album art or a gig poster. Whatever.
Off the top of my head, the album art on Violator has always stuck with me. That single sketched rose on a black background pretty much defined the early nineties for me. I've also always dug those old 1960's concert posters with the hippie lettering and bright colors.
Do you read books? If so, what are your favorite books and/or authors?
I used to read A LOT when I was younger. Having a baby got me off books and I never really got back into them. I pick books up now and then at the airport (the last one being Too Fat to Fish by Artie Lange) but I don't read nearly as much as I used to.
When I do read, I prefer non-fiction over fiction. I love biographies and real life murder-mystery stuff. To me, non-fiction ends up being more interesting than anything a fiction writer can make up. I loved the book Patricia Cromwell wrote about Jack-the- Ripper. Enough so that we're going to do a Jack-the-Ripper walk in London in a couple of weeks.
I also recently read Running with Scissors, which was hilarious. My favorite of all time is Catcher in the Rye; I know that sounds hipster, but it's been my favorite since I was 15 and had to read it for school. So fuck the hipsters. I also really really love The Road by Cormac McCarthy.
What's your favorite joke to tell?
What is your favorite curse word? What is your favorite way to tell someone off?
My all-time favorite is a visual joke. I've been telling it since I was 13; my best friend's dad told it to me and I STILL TELL IT. I hooked up with her recently through Facebook and I told her I still tell this joke; she couldn't believe I still find it so amusing.
Q: Why is it that when an eagle is flying towards the sun he has a four-foot wingspan, but when he's flying away from the sun he has an eight-foot wingspan?
A: Because when he's flying towards the sun, he's flying like this: (At this point in the joke, I pretend to fly around with one arm covering my eyes).
I prefer to not tell someone off; I don't think it has as much value as SHOWING someone you're pissed. Example-some guy I used to fool around with fooled around with me the same weekend he got back together with his ex wife. Of course, he didn't tell me this until after he was done (which was like, 10 seconds). I got pissed and got up to leave, but before I left, I went into the bathroom and cleaned his dirty, filthy toilet with his toothbrush. And then I made sure he found out about it about a week later.