Anybody Got Any Ideas For Getting Away With Resume Exaggerations?

[thelastgreatman]

Specifically, the whole big fiasco with my dad happened when I was in my last semester on the way to a lazy BA in English. As a result I went a little loopy and never completed some of the coursework, thus still being 6 credits short of the degree. I always put down that I got it anyway on my res and shit 'cause I didn't really imagine it coming up, and now it is. I managed to land a really decent job that is thoroughly life-saving and my recruiter just sent me the background check releases, thankfully she didn't check the box for "Education Verification" so I just sent it back without filling that part out to at least stall temporarily. If I'm lucky, she didn't mention it or check the box because they aren't interested in verifying my education; if I'm unlucky, which is the prevailing wind of recent history, I need to figure out how to handle this conversation rather urgently.

So: anyone ever worked for one of these background check places and got any ideas, or work in HR and have some suggestions of strategic lies I should prepare, or work for a University and know a way to make my transcript unreleasable even with written authorization? Called my school and they said they send the whole transcript for these deals, which is even worse.

C'mon Board, show me some of that sweet, sweet pep...

[bug on your lip]

just don't open your mouth & you should be fine

[kreutz2112]

finish your degree.

[BlackSwan]

this thread is going to get funny...

C'mon Board, show me some of that sweet, sweet pep...

[Jenniehoo]

I didn't complete Speech in order to get my A.A. for like 2 years before I got my B.A. - so I put, "60 Hours of Coursework Completed - A.A. Equivalent". That way you can explain it - but they know that you did the work. I think being honest is the best thing you can do if they ask - I mean, short of, "oh man, I was fucked up for a semester and couldn't complete my degree," but tell them some personal issues arose and you were unable to complete the degree. But it's possible they won't ask. I didn't even have my degree in my portfolio for like 5 years and I managed to get two good jobs just on the assertion that I had one - they didn't ask for transcripts or anything.

[thelastgreatman]

I'm banking on them not making an issue of it. Failing that, I will pull on every heartstring this fucking lady has until I yank the one that counts.

[fiyahhh!]

How long ago was this "last semester"? If it was recent, you could always say it's "in progress"... if they bite, chances are they'll either a. forget about it over time or b. won't care after you've proven yourself as a valuable asset to their company. Good luck.

[thelastgreatman]

2003. Yeah, that ain't gonna work--way I see it my current obstacle is just explaining to the recruiter why I would have deceived her which I think I could get her to understand 'cause she loves me anyway. But I'm concerned whether or not she's definitely obliged to inform the client about this inconsistency/untruth, which might look horrible.

[BlackSwan]

2003. Yeah, that ain't gonna work--way I see it my current obstacle is just explaining to the recruiter why I would have deceived her which I think I could get her to understand 'cause she loves me anyway. But I'm concerned whether or not she's definitely obliged to inform the client about this inconsistency/untruth, which might look horrible.

the recruiter is probably a bigger liar than you are, they are going to do anything to get you hired so don't worry about them ratting you out now, especially since you are so close to being hired.. i have a couple friends who used to be recruiters and it is a super shady business.

[thelastgreatman]

Okay, she just called me to check about something else on the release I filled out and didn't mention anything about the education section--you are now all allowed to be relieved.

[SFChrissy]

Finish your degree your so close but in the mean time...say "Bachelor In English Degree Candidate"

It gives them the indication that you have a degree, are in the process of getting one or are soon to graduate...it works!!!

[chairmenmeow47]

finish your degree.

best answer so far. it's only 6 credits!!! you could maybe even test out of those if they aren't core classes!!! get on that!!!

forget my answer, you got it solved

best of luck, randy!!!

[thelastgreatman]

Fuck that goddamn degree. The school I went to is cunty about transferring credits to seemingly anywhere and it was a waste of time to begin with.

EDIT: all that profanity was not directed at you, Ivy. For you I naturally have nothing to say but whispers of sweet nothings and perhaps a few gentle interrogatories re: anal.

[bug on your lip]

can u hold on a sec Randy ?

"worst day in Board History" thread is calling me on the other line

[chairmenmeow47]

Fuck that goddamn degree. The school I went to is cunty about transferring credits to seemingly anywhere and it was a waste of time to begin with.

SIX CREDITS!

the bigger waste of time is the other 114 credits that aren't an ACTUAL DEGREE! come on, randy!!! put up with their bullshit for 6 credits!!!

ok, i'll take my "i've worked for a university for 6 years" hat off now

*edit* i didn't think that was directed at me cause i'm not a goddamned pussy =P thanks for the sweet nothings, i still want you to finish your degree though!!! we'll have to get you a tutor a la billy madison...

[SFChrissy]

2003. Yeah, that ain't gonna work--way I see it my current obstacle is just explaining to the recruiter why I would have deceived her which I think I could get her to understand 'cause she loves me anyway. But I'm concerned whether or not she's definitely obliged to inform the client about this inconsistency/untruth, which might look horrible.

If she's representing you she's representing you so she can get her commission. She won't inform him of your inconsistency/untruth...she wants to fullfill her client and get her commission. If she likes you than she'll be more eager to push your resume and how you personally impact her client depends on you getting the job or not.

[thelastgreatman]

David Spade sent me a letter from 1993, Bug--he's asking that you cease and desist exuming that joke's corpse.

[thelastgreatman]

SIX CREDITS!

the bigger waste of time is the other 114 credits that aren't an ACTUAL DEGREE! come on, randy!!! put up with their bullshit for 6 credits!!!

ok, i'll take my "i've worked for a university for 6 years" hat off now

*edit* i didn't think that was directed at me cause i'm not a goddamned pussy =P thanks for the sweet nothings, i still want you to finish your degree though!!! we'll have to get you a tutor a la billy madison...

You work for a school? Well that automatically makes our tryst kinky for me, so that's good.

If she's representing you she's representing you so she can get her commission. She won't inform him of your inconsistency/untruth...she wants to fullfill her client and get her commission. If she likes you than she'll be more eager to push your resume and how you personally impact her client depends on you getting the job or not.

I like this kind of perspective. Good call, Chrissy.

[bug on your lip]

just pay the recruiter to finish yer degree

[kreutz2112]

can u hold on a sec Randy ?

"worst day in Board History" thread is calling me on the other line

lul

[SFChrissy]

I like this kind of perspective. Good call, Chrissy.

I had to deal with those fucks for 6 months and that's pretty much what it comes down too...good luck Randing!!!

[thelastgreatman]

Kreutz, your taste in Bug jokes is as devoid of a sense of humor as your demotivational posters.

Bug, I'll see you in bed, asshole.

[kreutz2112]

I know his joke wasn't that funny, thats why I said lul. lul is like a small chuckle to me.

[bug on your lip]

Randy

don't u see without this degree u r losing control...

some chick needing a commission controls u...

get yer effin 6 credits done or pop some pills & push a mop
either way u bring control back in yer balmy hands

[chairmenmeow47]

some chick needing a commission controls u...

isn't that always the way...

[thelastgreatman]

I'll pay one of these horseshit institutions the day that they pry the money from my cold, dead hands.


Seeing as I don't anticipate having any money in the near future I think I should be safe.

[thestripe]

isn't that always the way...

Young blood is living proof.

[locachica73]

I use to be the HR/Recruiter for the company I am with now and I can honestly say we never verified education, just work history. I guess we figured if the prior companies hired and gave good references then that was all that really mattered. But I guess it would depend on the position your going for. I think the only time they would really look into education is if you have to have a license of some sort to practice in the field your going for, i.e. doctor, teacher, lawyer. Just my thoughts.

[menikmati]

what kind of job?

[CalmerThanYou]

What's the name of the company? I need contact info too, i'll get this sorted out for you...