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Thread: Confessions

  1. #10921
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by canexplain View Post
    I forgot how this talk got started. Sorry dude, that sucks for both you and BD...ron****
    I confess, it's my fault. I managed to take a productive member of society and seduce him with my wily ways into partaking in the ceremonial act of getting a little high while we were frolicking along the ocean shore of Hawaii on our honeymoon. Yes, folks, it was me. I was the bad influence... Poor guy married a pothead.

    Quote Originally Posted by Suffacated View Post
    Next time I'm just gonna give them my boxers...
    theres 3 different specimens to choose from that way.
    There isn't enough weed in the world that could convince me to ever hand wash your clothes, are we clear?
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  2. #10922
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    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    Today should end up being very productive.
    My student assistants got alerted from their friends that free food is being given away in the main student center and have subsequently been sent on a work related errand to fetch me some.

    10/18-19: Treasure Island Music Festival
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  3. #10923
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    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    Does weed now induce pica?
    Okay, I just had to look up pica and I can give you my report on the subject...As a stressed out youngster, I used to take advantage of each downswing on the swingset to scoop up a handful of dirt to ingest. It was comforting. I was also caught sneaking into the dog's house to share it's kibble. Never even heard of weed until I was about 13. I had already quit using the dirt as a crutch after realizing I was probably eating the kibble recycled instead of the fresh kibble the dog offered up, so my early teens were just wrought with stress and I had no choice but to turn to pot. It's been a lifesaver! I can't even imagine what size I'd be from being married to a guy who moves dirt for a living!

    There. I might be a little bit off, or a special case, but no, weed came after, not before, pica.
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  4. #10924
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    TRUE CONFESSION: I might be a little bit off.
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  5. #10925
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by guedita View Post
    My student assistants got alerted from their friends that free food is being given away in the main student center and have subsequently been sent on a work related errand to fetch me some.
    Damn, I should just bite the bullet and start applying at local colleges. I'd lose my tenure and about 10 years in retirement. It might be worth it if I could send my students on errands to feed my munchies.

  6. #10926
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    Damn, I should just bite the bullet and start applying at local colleges. I'd lose my tenure and about 10 years in retirement. It might be worth it if I could send my students on errands to feed my munchies.
    I agree with your first post but not the 2nd. See I can read and digest.
    Have Another Hit Of Colorado Sunshine

  7. #10927
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    Ron thinks that companies ask for you Facebook password.
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  8. #10928
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    Quote Originally Posted by BROKENDOLL View Post
    Okay, I just had to look up pica and I can give you my report on the subject...As a stressed out youngster, I used to take advantage of each downswing on the swingset to scoop up a handful of dirt to ingest. It was comforting. I was also caught sneaking into the dog's house to share it's kibble. Never even heard of weed until I was about 13. I had already quit using the dirt as a crutch after realizing I was probably eating the kibble recycled instead of the fresh kibble the dog offered up, so my early teens were just wrought with stress and I had no choice but to turn to pot. It's been a lifesaver! I can't even imagine what size I'd be from being married to a guy who moves dirt for a living!

    There. I might be a little bit off, or a special case, but no, weed came after, not before, pica.
    I think her question was more along the lines of a witty joke about what Cara was going to eat, not a real question...
    Quote Originally Posted by Newro7ic View Post
    Lakers fans are some of the most delusional people in the world, I swear.
    my name is casey. i love pavement and i want to pet every dog in the world.

  9. #10929
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    Quote Originally Posted by RotationSlimWang View Post
    Ron thinks that companies ask for you Facebook password.
    One of a hundred ......

    http://www.smartplanet.com/blog/thin...password/10872
    Have Another Hit Of Colorado Sunshine

  10. #10930
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Oops.

  11. #10931
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    That's not going to get anybody sued at all
    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    Hannah, I don't know that pigs have big weiners, and my early 20's facination with dogs because of weiner size, I think. If that helps.

  12. #10932
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    Quote Originally Posted by locachica73 View Post
    When you have a CDL you shouldn't be smoking or doing any other drugs. I am sorry, I am all for people smoking weed up until they are driving a big rig on long hauls across country. Especially with the kind of money you guys make, it's worth giving up until you can retire.

    Had this been a DOT mandated test, I would have fucked myself. And while I agree that being under the influence of anything doing the kind of work that I do is like playing Russian Roulette.
    Pissing in a cup doesn't tell anyone if I had smoked that morning, the night before or a week ago.
    And because I had smoked 4 fucking weeks prior to pissing in the cup proves what?
    That i'm a danger to myself or others? That I'm likely to run over people?
    No... it's just another way that our civil liberties get taken away from us
    and it means that I was " unfit for employment" ....thats what the dude from Skanska told me that morning.
    I wanted to punch him in his throat.
    So..... if me smoking a joint while I'm on vacation, off duty, away from operating heavy equipment minding my own business 4 fucking weeks ago means that I'm unfit for employment.....then fuck me!
    From now on, Quick fix plus goes everywhere I go, I keep my cash truck driving job, I pick up my clearance from ECCO Equipment Rental and Skanska can kiss my ass.

  13. #10933
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    Default Re: Confessions

    The last drug test I took I had smoked about an hour before, but I passed. That was funny.

  14. #10934
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    When I was married I never smoked and never got called in for a random, the first time I decide to smoke after seperation I got called for a random two weeks after. Back then the only options were the tea that took 24 hours to clean your system, which I didn't have. So I drank a bunch of cranberry juice and water, and just rolled the dice, praying that it would come back ok. It was clean. So I don't quite buy that you had only smoked 1 joint 4 weeks prior because there is no way you would have still pissed a dirty test. Not that I am judging you for smoking, I am a smoker. I also agree with you that it sucks that this drug stays in your system for so long and there is no way to prove when you smoked. What I do not agree with is knowing that you are risking a $40+/hour job for a joint now and then. If I made that kind of money and knew that my number could get pulled at any time, it would just be a lot easier for me to say no. If your company reports that to DOT then you will never work as in the field again. It just isn't worth the risk in my opinion.

  15. #10935
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Because you were stoned...

  16. #10936
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    Quote Originally Posted by Suffacated View Post
    Because you were stoned...
    And I had been pretty much every day prior for several years. Obviously the place that I got tested at was really crappy at their job.

  17. #10937
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    26th of Jan Bev and I shared a joint.
    26th of Feb I pissed in the cup.
    Coachella has been my one and only week to smoke.
    Other than that,I don't risk it and believe me....I am a lightweight.
    Second hand smoke fucks me up.

  18. #10938
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    So . . . It really is BD's fault. Does she hotbox the house?

    And that's pretty shitty on her part to tempt you and put you at risk daily when you are the half that's bringing home the bacon.

    Sorry, Suff.

  19. #10939
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    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    And I had been pretty much every day prior for several years. Obviously the place that I got tested at was really crappy at their job.
    Or you have some super magical clean pee.
    Wanna sell some?

  20. #10940
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    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    So . . . It really is BD's fault. Does she hotbox the house?
    No.....its my fault. She didn't make me smoke.
    But she does pee in the shower.
    Last edited by Suffacated; 03-14-2013 at 02:36 PM.

  21. #10941
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Maybe I do. Luckily, I haven't had to test it in a while.

  22. #10942
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    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    So . . . It really is BD's fault. Does she hotbox the house?

    And that's pretty shitty on her part to tempt you and put you at risk daily when you are the half that's bringing home the bacon.

    Sorry, Suff.

    But I don't know how to cook the bacon. I need her.

  23. #10943
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    Quote Originally Posted by casey View Post
    I think her question was more along the lines of a witty joke about what Cara was going to eat, not a real question...
    Well it was sure a sneaky way of getting my confession to eating dirt out into the open now, didn't it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Suffacated View Post
    Had this been a DOT mandated test, I would have fucked myself. And while I agree that being under the influence of anything doing the kind of work that I do is like playing Russian Roulette.
    Pissing in a cup doesn't tell anyone if I had smoked that morning, the night before or a week ago.
    And because I had smoked 4 fucking weeks prior to pissing in the cup proves what?
    That i'm a danger to myself or others? That I'm likely to run over people?
    No... it's just another way that our civil liberties get taken away from us
    and it means that I was " unfit for employment" ....thats what the dude from Skanska told me that morning.
    I wanted to punch him in his throat.
    So..... if me smoking a joint while I'm on vacation, off duty, away from operating heavy equipment minding my own business 4 fucking weeks ago means that I'm unfit for employment.....then fuck me!
    From now on, Quick fix plus goes everywhere I go, I keep my cash truck driving job, I pick up my clearance from ECCO Equipment Rental and Skanska can kiss my ass.
    They should call it something more discreet, like, URINE LUCK or some shit.

    "Do you work in a place that likes to surprise you with a drug test? Do your parents accuse you of getting high on drugs and then threaten you with your future as a heroin addict, after smoking a little marijuana at a party the night before? URINE LUCK! Don't leave home without it!"
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  24. #10944
    ankle biter guedita's Avatar
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    Bev, you abstract internet art, you.

    10/18-19: Treasure Island Music Festival
    10/22: Roman Flugel @ f8
    10/25: Moodymann @ PW
    11/20: The Drive by Truckers, Sturgill Simpson @ The Fillmore

  25. #10945
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    Quote Originally Posted by BROKENDOLL View Post
    Well it was sure a sneaky way of getting my confession to eating dirt out into the open now, didn't it?


    They should call it something more discreet, like, URINE LUCK or some shit.

    "Do you work in a place that likes to surprise you with a drug test? Do your parents accuse you of getting high on drugs and then threaten you with your future as a heroin addict, after smoking a little marijuana at a party the night before? URINE LUCK! Don't leave home without it!"

    Quote Originally Posted by Newro7ic View Post
    Lakers fans are some of the most delusional people in the world, I swear.
    my name is casey. i love pavement and i want to pet every dog in the world.

  26. #10946
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    I thought that brilliant idea sounded familiar.

  27. #10947
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    See? Now I'm reduced to 1/2 an abstract

    Quote Originally Posted by locachica73 View Post
    When I was married I never smoked and never got called in for a random, the first time I decide to smoke after seperation I got called for a random two weeks after. Back then the only options were the tea that took 24 hours to clean your system, which I didn't have. So I drank a bunch of cranberry juice and water, and just rolled the dice, praying that it would come back ok. It was clean. So I don't quite buy that you had only smoked 1 joint 4 weeks prior because there is no way you would have still pissed a dirty test. Not that I am judging you for smoking, I am a smoker. I also agree with you that it sucks that this drug stays in your system for so long and there is no way to prove when you smoked. What I do not agree with is knowing that you are risking a $40+/hour job for a joint now and then. If I made that kind of money and knew that my number could get pulled at any time, it would just be a lot easier for me to say no. If your company reports that to DOT then you will never work as in the field again. It just isn't worth the risk in my opinion.
    Seriously, we were just as surprised, and weed wasn't the first thing I considered for a dirty test...

    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    And I had been pretty much every day prior for several years. Obviously the place that I got tested at was really crappy at their job.
    I have a feeling that the company he was looking at uses a lab that has the ability to do further testing if necessary. He's used that stuff before without a problem, and I know he did everything right because he made a production out of here before leaving. Watching him walk to his truck, I couldn't help but think that if it were me, some way some how, I'd make it to the front desk at the lab and a puddle would start forming at my feet. After he told me the procedure and how he was the very first person of their day, I figured maybe the temp issue was from the office being cold. When he pointed out that this technician had a hard time reading the temp and just tossed it out telling him to pee again, the thought crossed my mind that maybe they do that, knowing there's a chance that the first batch was fake. Seems to me that temp or not, they could have still tested it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Suffacated View Post
    No.....its my fault. She didn't make me smoke.
    But she does pee in the shower.
    Doesn't everybody?

    Quote Originally Posted by algunz View Post
    So . . . It really is BD's fault. Does she hotbox the house?

    And that's pretty shitty on her part to tempt you and put you at risk daily when you are the half that's bringing home the bacon.

    Sorry, Suff.
    Hotbox the house??? I don't know how big you roll your joints before heading off to teach, but I can assure you that my one-hitter in the other room isn't capable of providing enough second hand smoke to put him at risk. Hell, since he quit smoking, I try to avoid smoking around him, period.
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  28. #10948
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    Default Re: Confessions

    The wife and I celebrated 24 years this week and I confess that the only thing on my mind was what sweet dessert to eat on the occasion.
    Whiskey Sour

    2 oz blended whiskey
    Juice of 1/2 lemon
    1/2 tsp powdered sugar
    1 cherry
    1/2 slice lemon

    Shake blended whiskey, juice of lemon, and powdered sugar with ice and strain into a whiskey sour glass. Decorate with the half-slice of lemon, top with the cherry, and serve.

  29. #10949
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    Quote Originally Posted by fatbastard View Post
    The wife and I celebrated 24 years this week and I confess that the only thing on my mind was what sweet dessert to eat on the occasion.
    Big Congrats, fb! I hope she showed up wearing a chocolate mousse ensemble with whip cream for the trim... -
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

  30. #10950
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    Default Re: Confessions

    You know, it's probably a good thing I waited to remarry later in life... I can't imagine someone having to tolerate my ass for 24 years.
    Its like the Infinite Monkey Theorem, if you put X amount of monkeys in a room with a typewriter and ask them to give you Shakespeare 99% of them will fling their shit at you while the other 1% will masturbate in the corner.

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