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Thread: Confessions

  1. #5581
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Reading the last 3 pages has made me like my boyfriend a little more.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  2. #5582
    troll, banned hydr1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    I have been trapped in relationships since 1998.
    there were never times when I was telling people or thinking, "man I need to get laid"
    Hate me all you want....but I've NEVER ever had a problem being loved, getting fucked or having a good time with women.

    I attribute it to my disgust in the matter. My fear of being attatched.

    Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance. Make some money, make some art...there's soooo many things better than blowing your money trying to win over some chick. Do you people really spend this much time wishing and working on getting a piece of ass? Guys are out there buying nice cars and working their asses off to impress women and land a better catch, in hopes of one day being married to her and having a happy family. Then one day you wake up and your divorced and half of everything you ever worked for is givven to some whack woman that you thought you'd tricked.

    Kind of like a job. Don't show up and give them everything ya got right away. They're just going to expect more. When you can't give them more, they will find someone new that is willing to kiss ass and be walked all over.

    Whatever though...like I said. I don't give a shit about lust and meeting more selfish humans. Everyone is out for thiers and its a pathetic game. I don't belive you should be trying so hard if it was meant to be. It will happen on its own. Its a curse.

  3. #5583
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    This is groundbreaking stuff.
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  4. #5584
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    I have been trapped in relationships since 1998.
    there were never times when I was telling people or thinking, "man I need to get laid"
    Hate me all you want....but I've NEVER ever had a problem being loved, getting fucked or having a good time with women.

    I attribute it to my disgust in the matter. My fear of being attatched.

    Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance. Make some money, make some art...there's soooo many things better than blowing your money trying to win over some chick. Do you people really spend this much time wishing and working on getting a piece of ass? Guys are out there buying nice cars and working their asses off to impress women and land a better catch, in hopes of one day being married to her and having a happy family. Then one day you wake up and your divorced and half of everything you ever worked for is givven to some whack woman that you thought you'd tricked.

    Kind of like a job. Don't show up and give them everything ya got right away. They're just going to expect more. When you can't give them more, they will find someone new that is willing to kiss ass and be walked all over.

    Whatever though...like I said. I don't give a shit about lust and meeting more selfish humans. Everyone is out for thiers and its a pathetic game. I don't belive you should be trying so hard if it was meant to be. It will happen on its own. Its a curse.
    Is the hypothetical divorce the hypothetical woman's fault?
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  5. #5585
    Coachella Junkie chiapet's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    What the fuck does that have to do with buying a chick a drink in a bar?
    You said it yourself that people picking up in a bar aren't looking to get married and have 2.5 kids.

    Your low sex drive doesn't make you better than anyone else.

  6. #5586
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    My favorite part is where he harpoons everybody for acting like they "know it all" in between overlong philosophical diatribes encapsulating how he's decided the world works.

  7. #5587
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance.
    Ok, like what?
    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    Make some money
    Oh.
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  8. #5588
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    What's going to happen when you argue with a chick you met at a bar? She's going to go back to the bar, be an emotional wreck and bang some other horny idiot. She's going to take her wedding ring off and go drink at a bar and look for attention from someone else.
    You would write the worst choose-your-own-adventure book ever.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  9. #5589
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hannahrain View Post
    My favorite part is where he harpoons everybody for acting like they "know it all" in between overlong philosophical diatribes encapsulating how he's decided the world works.
    But you have to admit it's a pretty novel and edgy stance: I mean, a GUY ... that DOESN'T WANT TO PUT MUCH EFFORT INTO GETTING A GIRLFRIEND?!?!

    Suck on that reality, SOCIETY!
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  10. #5590
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Sheep like you and me just don't get it, Malcolm. Drinks?

  11. #5591
    Coachella Junkie nathanfairchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    I have been trapped in relationships since 1998.
    there were never times when I was telling people or thinking, "man I need to get laid"
    Hate me all you want....but I've NEVER ever had a problem being loved, getting fucked or having a good time with women.

    I attribute it to my disgust in the matter. My fear of being attatched.

    Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance. Make some money, make some art...there's soooo many things better than blowing your money trying to win over some chick. Do you people really spend this much time wishing and working on getting a piece of ass? Guys are out there buying nice cars and working their asses off to impress women and land a better catch, in hopes of one day being married to her and having a happy family. Then one day you wake up and your divorced and half of everything you ever worked for is givven to some whack woman that you thought you'd tricked.

    Kind of like a job. Don't show up and give them everything ya got right away. They're just going to expect more. When you can't give them more, they will find someone new that is willing to kiss ass and be walked all over.

    Whatever though...like I said. I don't give a shit about lust and meeting more selfish humans. Everyone is out for thiers and its a pathetic game. I don't belive you should be trying so hard if it was meant to be. It will happen on its own. Its a curse.
    yeah maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan. you're just so above it all. go put a bird on it.
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    Quote Originally Posted by SoulDischarge View Post
    Muse might as well named themselves the Pablo Honeys.

  12. #5592
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    You would write the worst choose-your-own-adventure book ever.
    You've reached the Enchanted Dungeon. The Princess is locked inside a golden cage, guarded by the Dragon Master. The Sword of Elders dangles from a long chain affixed to the ceiling in the center of the room.

    DO YOU:
    A: FORGET ABOUT THE PRINCESS BECAUSE YOU KNOW ALL SHE IS CONCERNED WITH IS MONEY AND THE SECOND SHE MEETS SOME OTHER KNIGHT WITH A NICER BMW THAT WEDDING RING IS COMING OFF

    OR

    B: LEAVE AND GO TO AN ART EXHIBITION BECAUSE MAYBE THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE THERE THAT ACTUALLY THINK INSTEAD OF SPENDING THEIR ENTIRE LIFE DRUNK IN A BAR HOOKING UP WITH PEOPLE BECAUSE THAT IS SERIOUSLY THE ONLY THINK THEY CAN THINK ABOUT
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  13. #5593
    cat hoarder rskapcat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    'Baby batter' needs to be excised from the world's slang vocabulary NOW. I actually make the "might barf" face when I read it.
    My name is Becca. Hi.

    Facebook, yo.
    Quote Originally Posted by SoulDischarge View Post
    If it was supposed to be a joke, there'd be a cat in the picture somewhere. That's how you can tell, on the internet.

  14. #5594
    troll, banned hydr1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.

    I've never been to a strip club, never had a one night stand. I just think that shits not real. Its like going to church or eating a candy bar. It makes you feel good. How many other thingss make you feel good though? If your out there doing rad shit and having fun doing things of suubstance your going to attract more people than you will trying to be witty and spit game in a bar. Meet a chick at the rock climbing gym for example. You share something in common. Your both being healthy. Your both in shape. You can see muscles and skin while using your brain and body. Your overcoming challenges.

    Is that a better adventure book than sharing an addiction in common, both being unable to walk or see straight, standing on the smoking patio, being in a dim lit room and not knowing if the person your talking to looks deformed or its just the lighting/booze. Your wasting money and adding pounds onto your ass?

  15. #5595
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.

    I've never been to a strip club, never had a one night stand. I just think that shits not real. Its like going to church or eating a candy bar. It makes you feel good. How many other thingss make you feel good though? If your out there doing rad shit and having fun doing things of suubstance your going to attract more people than you will trying to be witty and spit game in a bar. Meet a chick at the rock climbing gym for example. You share something in common. Your both being healthy. Your both in shape. You can see muscles and skin while using your brain and body. Your overcoming challenges.

    Is that a better adventure book than sharing an addiction in common, both being unable to walk or see straight, standing on the smoking patio, being in a dim lit room and not knowing if the person your talking to looks deformed or its just the lighting/booze. Your wasting money and adding pounds onto your ass?
    Do you have as big of a problem with the proper form of "you're" as you do with sex?
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  16. #5596
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by locachica73 View Post
    Reading the last 3 pages has made me like my boyfriend a little more.
    After reading the last 3 pages, I think I've realized my soulmate has been in the upper left hand side of my underwear drawer all this time.

  17. #5597
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  18. #5598
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Wait isn't this the guy who got so drunk he threw water on his girlfriend because she passed out instead of having sex with him?
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  19. #5599
    Coachella Junkie nathanfairchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.

    I've never been to a strip club, never had a one night stand. I just think that shits not real. Its like going to church or eating a candy bar. It makes you feel good. How many other thingss make you feel good though? If your out there doing rad shit and having fun doing things of suubstance your going to attract more people than you will trying to be witty and spit game in a bar. Meet a chick at the rock climbing gym for example. You share something in common. Your both being healthy. Your both in shape. You can see muscles and skin while using your brain and body. Your overcoming challenges.

    Is that a better adventure book than sharing an addiction in common, both being unable to walk or see straight, standing on the smoking patio, being in a dim lit room and not knowing if the person your talking to looks deformed or its just the lighting/booze. Your wasting money and adding pounds onto your ass?
    you sound genuinely unhappy
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    Quote Originally Posted by SoulDischarge View Post
    Muse might as well named themselves the Pablo Honeys.

  20. #5600
    Gummi bear sultan miscorrections's Avatar
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    Also MJA that was fantastic.
    Quote Originally Posted by bmack86 View Post
    Has anyone gone on a date with a sandwich recently? What base did you get to? Ham?

  21. #5601
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    Thanks. I just felt like doing something of substance.
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  22. #5602
    Coachella Junkie nathanfairchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    like making money?
    April 22 - Thee Silver Mt. Zion Memorial
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    Quote Originally Posted by SoulDischarge View Post
    Muse might as well named themselves the Pablo Honeys.

  23. #5603
    Coachella Junkie locachica73's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by miscorrections View Post
    Wait isn't this the guy who got so drunk he threw water on his girlfriend because she passed out instead of having sex with him?
    I was thinking the exact same thing but get people confused too often so I was planning to go back and verify, thanks for confirming for me.
    Quote Originally Posted by SlowMotionApocalypse View Post
    I have snuck in weapons before
    Quote Originally Posted by TomAz View Post
    A butt plug is not a weapon.

  24. #5604
    troll, banned hydr1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    The only way I am better is if different is better. Im not sorry that I don't think like everyone else. I don't regret being in a relationship with my girl. Im happy. That's prob why im not worried about impressing people online or in public. I have everything I want already. Just riding the gravy train now and paying my dues. I will repeat though that falling in love is a curse, especially for someone who thinks like I do. My girl and everyone else I know thinks like the rest of you, so ill assume im the freak. I for sure the freak here.

    I really hope you all find what you are looking for and enjoy the mystery of what might pop up during on of your watering hole adventures.

    So this is my confession I guess. I don't give a fuck what women or anyone else thinks and im not going to waste my time trying to figure out how to trap someone or trick them into loving me. I have plenty that love me the way I am. Retarded, selfish, weird and illiterate.

  25. #5605
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  26. #5606
    Coachella Junkie nathanfairchild's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    The only way I am better is if different is better. Im not sorry that I don't think like everyone else. I don't regret being in a relationship with my girl. Im happy. That's prob why im not worried about impressing people online or in public. I have everything I want already. Just riding the gravy train now and paying my dues. I will repeat though that falling in love is a curse, especially for someone who thinks like I do. My girl and everyone else I know thinks like the rest of you, so ill assume im the freak. I for sure the freak here.

    I really hope you all find what you are looking for and enjoy the mystery of what might pop up during on of your watering hole adventures.

    So this is my confession I guess. I don't give a fuck what women or anyone else thinks and im not going to waste my time trying to figure out how to trap someone or trick them into loving me. I have plenty that love me the way I am. Retarded, selfish, weird and illiterate.
    i guess all that's left is to just kill yourself
    April 22 - Thee Silver Mt. Zion Memorial
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    June 6-8 - X Games Concerts
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    June 27 - Deafheaven / Swans


    Quote Originally Posted by SoulDischarge View Post
    Muse might as well named themselves the Pablo Honeys.

  27. #5607
    Coachella Junkie malcolmjamalawesome's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hydr1 View Post
    The only way I am better is if different is better. Im not sorry that I don't think like everyone else. I don't regret being in a relationship with my girl. Im happy. That's prob why im not worried about impressing people online or in public. I have everything I want already. Just riding the gravy train now and paying my dues. I will repeat though that falling in love is a curse, especially for someone who thinks like I do. My girl and everyone else I know thinks like the rest of you, so ill assume im the freak. I for sure the freak here.

    I really hope you all find what you are looking for and enjoy the mystery of what might pop up during on of your watering hole adventures.

    So this is my confession I guess. I don't give a fuck what women or anyone else thinks and im not going to waste my time trying to figure out how to trap someone or trick them into loving me. I have plenty that love me the way I am. Retarded, selfish, weird and illiterate.
    You're very unique.
    Quote Originally Posted by ruetheday View Post
    I don't fucking care. I don't even know who the hell Dave Wang is.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devin the Dude View Post
    you used to be that guy that just Dave Wang's everybody. that guy. he's gone now, and whoever you really are showed up, and that was utter disappointment.

  28. #5608
    Coachella Junkie chiapet's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    MJA, you have made me choke on my beverage (Let's face it, I go to bars, so I must *always* be drinking) TWICE in the last hour. You're causing me distress.

  29. #5609
    LOLocaust Survivor Hannahrain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    I wish I could find a pithier way to suggest a Higher Plane Pseudoenlightened Being of the Week award.

  30. #5610
    Daft Punky Junkie BROKENDOLL's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confessions

    I like hydr1.

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