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Thread: This Is Necessary

  1. #31
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    And the angel of the lord came unto me, snatching me up from my place of slumber.

    And took me on high, and higher still until we moved to the spaces betwixt the air itself.

    And he brought me into a vast farmlands of our own midwest. And as we descended, cries of impending doom rose from the soil. One thousand, nay a million voices full of fear.

    And terror possesed me then.

    And I begged, "Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?"

    And the angel said unto me, "These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots!

    You see, Reverend Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day and to them it is the holocaust."

    And I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat like the tears of one million terrified brothers and roared, "Hear me now, I have seen the light! They have a consciousness, they have a life, they have a soul! Damn you! Let the rabbits wear glasses! Save our brothers!"

    Can I get an amen?

    Can I get a hallelujah?

    Thank you Jesus.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
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  2. #32
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    It was daylight when you woke up in your ditch. You looked up at your sky then. That made blue be your color. You had your knife there with you too. When you stood up there was goo all over your clothes. Your hands were sticky. You wiped them on your grass, so now your color was green. Oh Lord, why did everything always have to keep changing like this. You were already getting nervous again. Your head hurt and it rang when you stood up. Your head was almost empty. It always hurt you when you woke up like this.

    You crawled up out of your ditch onto your gravel road and began to walk, waiting for the rest of your mind to come back to you. You can see the car parked far down the road and you walked toward it. "If God is our Father," you thought, "then Satan must be our cousin." Why didn't anyone else understand these important things? You got to your car and tried all the doors. They were locked. It was a red car and it was new. There was an expensive leather camera case laying on the seat. Out across your field, you could see two tiny people walking by your woods. You began to walk towards them. Now red was your color and, of course, those little people out there were yours too.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  3. #33

    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Did you guys know that Widespread Panic has a three night run in LA this month?

  4. #34
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    Did you know that Widespread Panic blows puppies? I don't support bombarding your protein tales with Widespread Panic.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  5. #35
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    4 degrees warmer
    I'll take you. I can't promise to stay soft the whole time, though.

  6. #36
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Quote Originally Posted by fatbastard View Post
    i'm not a violent guy, buy every time i see these fuckers i get an overwhelming urge to beat the crap out of them.

  7. #37
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Speaking of which, BoneDad, when are we gonna chill and jog Maynard's cock together?
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  8. #38
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Quote Originally Posted by xbnmx View Post
    Fiction or non-fiction?
    non-fiction. a few people i know will hate me when it's done, lol.
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  9. #39

    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Non-fiction books are a serious undertaking. I'm trying to write a few chapters for one, can't imagine doing an entire book my self. Would take at least a year. Can I ask what the subject your addressing is?

  10. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by xbnmx View Post
    Non-fiction books are a serious undertaking. I'm trying to write a few chapters for one, can't imagine doing an entire book my self. Would take at least a year. Can I ask what the subject your addressing is?
    well, it's kind of private stuff so to be vague i'll just say that it's one of those coming to terms types of books. i'm also trying to maintain a theme of what it's like to be a woman these days. ya know, it's like my generation of girls is stuck between the "get married and have kids" generation and the "DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES GET MARRIED OR HAVE KIDS OR YOU'RE A FREAKIGN LOSER" generation.

    it takes place over a trip to vegas on new years, so there's a lot of ranting and raving about vegas too, lol. that place is weird.

    and it is hard. it's really difficult to focus on just pouring out the details and not worrying about how it reads. that's been my goal. slowly i'm piecing it all together though
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  11. #41
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    A word of advice if you're writing a piece of autobiographical non-fiction--start fictionalizing it. Almost no one's real life events make for a truly good story. It took me a few years to realize that I needed to dramatize my own autobiographical story for it to be successful. Don't let what really happened pin you down.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
    Look, your parenting is yours and Randy's business alone.
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  12. #42
    Coachella Junkie algunz's Avatar
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Quote Originally Posted by thelastgreatman View Post
    A word of advice if you're writing a piece of autobiographical non-fiction--start fictionalizing it. Almost no one's real life events make for a truly good story. It took me a few years to realize that I needed to dramatize my own autobiographical story for it to be successful. Don't let what really happened pin you down.
    Ding! Maybe that's my problem. (They need a light bulb icon to stick here.)

  13. #43
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Quote Originally Posted by thelastgreatman View Post
    A word of advice if you're writing a piece of autobiographical non-fiction--start fictionalizing it. Almost no one's real life events make for a truly good story. It took me a few years to realize that I needed to dramatize my own autobiographical story for it to be successful. Don't let what really happened pin you down.
    D. H. Lawrence had some very real people in his books.
    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    i fucking hate women with their lives together who try and help other people. where are the needy bitches at?!

  14. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by amyzzz View Post
    D. H. Lawrence had some very real people in his books.
    Haven't read any Lawrence. Where in what I posted did it say anything about eschewing all reality?
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
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  15. #45
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    I was agreeing with you. Yeesh.
    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    i fucking hate women with their lives together who try and help other people. where are the needy bitches at?!

  16. #46
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Oh. Alright. I don't understand how you were, but that might be because I haven't read him, I guess. Are you saying D.H. wrote fiction but used a lot of real people in his stories? If so, that's true of the vast majority of fiction I think. The old "write what you know" principle. Not a truer guideline in the world.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
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  17. #47
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Quote Originally Posted by thelastgreatman View Post
    Speaking of which, BoneDad, when are we gonna chill and jog Maynard's cock together?
    Come on into chat, it's so hot right now. I'm afraid I have som ebad news for you though. come on in.....
    I'll take you. I can't promise to stay soft the whole time, though.

  18. #48
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Quote Originally Posted by thelastgreatman View Post
    A word of advice if you're writing a piece of autobiographical non-fiction--start fictionalizing it. Almost no one's real life events make for a truly good story. It took me a few years to realize that I needed to dramatize my own autobiographical story for it to be successful. Don't let what really happened pin you down.
    well, that may be something to consider.

    i do think i have had a pretty interesting life though. my first friend ever tried to choke me to death, i went to a boarding school, i was raped, i had anti-freeze poured down my throat by some football players from another school, i graduated early, went to vegas on my 18th birthday to get married only to have car trouble and spend all the money on that...

    and i'll stop there. but i think i can make it interesting, that's the goal at least. if not, i will definitely take your advice. thanks for the tip
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  19. #49

    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Holy F' Ivy

    why the hell did they pour anti-freeze down your throat ?
    did u have health probs from it ?

    holy beejezus
    Quote Originally Posted by RotationSlimWang View Post
    Say goodbye to that acid, Greg.

  20. #50
    Coachella Junkie chairmenmeow47's Avatar
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    no, no health problems. they flushed most of it out at the scene and in the ambulance. they broke my friends arm though. it was in the parking lot of jack in the box on our lunchbreak.

    they were just assholes. it was a stupid situation. caused this huge fight between the skaters at our school and the football players from their school. my friends and i didn't ask them to do that and i didn't go, but i heard it was like braveheart, lol. all fine and dandy till they brought guns i guess. i felt bad, a lot of people got hurt over that.

    it was a football town, so nothing happened to them. i get victim's rights notifications though every time one of them gets outta jail for stealing a car or something. winners!
    Quote Originally Posted by malcolmjamalawesome View Post
    It's when we discuss Coachella that we are at our collective dipshittiest.

  21. #51
    zeezus amyzzz's Avatar
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    Holy shit.
    Quote Originally Posted by chairmenmeow47 View Post
    i fucking hate women with their lives together who try and help other people. where are the needy bitches at?!

  22. #52
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Post Office

    Post Script

    Post Cereal
    Grape Nuts of course!
    Last edited by shoegazer76; 06-05-2007 at 10:37 AM.

  23. #53
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    I have quite the bit of confidence of being able to beat Maynard in a grappling match. His jitsu is over*rated.

    And in a fight, I would just take him down, so it would basically be the same as a grappling match [for those that think in a fight sense, and not single-discipline].

    E

  24. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeltaSigChi4 View Post
    I have quite the bit of confidence of being able to beat Maynard in a grappling match. His jitsu is over*rated.

    And in a fight, I would just take him down, so it would basically be the same as a grappling match [for those that think in a fight sense, and not single-discipline].

    E
    ***** please, his trainer is Rickson fuckin' Gracie.

    This is one case where you ain't strong enough to hotbox with god.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
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  25. #55
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    if there was a negative star rating I would infinitely negatively rate this thread.
    RAPE STOVE

    white power?!

  26. #56
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Yes. I am certain that Maynard trains on a daily basis under Hickson.

    Also, Hickson means shit to me. There are a hundred better trainers in BJJ and MMA in the country right now. It isn't 1993 anymore.

    E

  27. #57
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Quote Originally Posted by thelastgreatman View Post
    It was daylight when you woke up in your ditch. You looked up at your sky then. That made blue be your color. You had your knife there with you too. When you stood up there was goo all over your clothes. Your hands were sticky. You wiped them on your grass, so now your color was green. Oh Lord, why did everything always have to keep changing like this. You were already getting nervous again. Your head hurt and it rang when you stood up. Your head was almost empty. It always hurt you when you woke up like this.

    You crawled up out of your ditch onto your gravel road and began to walk, waiting for the rest of your mind to come back to you. You can see the car parked far down the road and you walked toward it. "If God is our Father," you thought, "then Satan must be our cousin." Why didn't anyone else understand these important things? You got to your car and tried all the doors. They were locked. It was a red car and it was new. There was an expensive leather camera case laying on the seat. Out across your field, you could see two tiny people walking by your woods. You began to walk towards them. Now red was your color and, of course, those little people out there were yours too.
    what is your interpretation of this?
    Originally Posted by Riggins33
    Why don't you show me a pic of what you look like and I'll send you a pick of myself. I'm 6'5 230....
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    Would you care to list the fixes I've proposed?
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    Thank god I did't suck that guy's dick.

  28. #58
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    I try not to interpret the madness.

    Sorry Delt, but Maynard would go house on you even though you're Irak-hardened.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
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  29. #59
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Hello ,

    Sorry for random entry, but I have been hearing about Coachella over here in England . I would love to go in 2008 and so would my Mrs. Thats putting it mildly, would probably happily sell my own leg for tickets.

    What is the deal with the whole ticket process, how do the organisers announce sale date? How long do they take to sell out ? Is sale restricted to US residents only ?

    If any one could help that would be really appreciated ?

    Ed

  30. #60
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    Default Re: This Is Necessary

    Um, I don't know why you asked that in this thread, but if you want an answer you're going to have to recite the intro to Rosetta Stoned.
    Quote Originally Posted by schoolofruckus View Post
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