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what the devil? I want a dinosaur shaped bottle. Where can i get one?

here's a confession of mine. I only date ugly guys so i feel like i always have the upper hand.
The one time i dated someone better looking than me was the time i got my heat broken. I won't let...

I kind of read this a few days late..but anyway.
I've tried responding to ads in the strictly platonic section. They're still all weird. Some girl i messaged wanted to be friends and invited me over...

It makes me wonder what she said to set him off. No one gets that crazy over nothing. It certaintly wasn't something like this,
"Oh mel, i love you"
"WHAT? I hope you get raped by a pack of...

Where do i submit my resume? I'd like to get paid $10 an hour just to hang with someone, and have them take me out to dinner and sporting events.

Awesome! i just bought some dinosaur bones slip ons.

Does anyone else find it weird that no one in the audience is dancing, or even bopping their heads?

So im going to SFO in a few weeks... Anyone know where i can find either shrooms or acid?

haha, i have a friend that hosts corn dog parties every year on this day. He's been doing it since it started, i think

It's not really so much as a code, as what i define it as. And most people don't automatically know what i'm referring to when i say devils grass, so why not define it for the rest of you. And i...

I'm going to San Francisco for the first time ever in May. Excitement is seeping out of my eye sockets. Anyone know where i can find some devils grass (bud)? Also, is the Muir Forest worth going to?

i think a guy i dated has asperger's syndrome. I told him once that i thought he had it, and he researched it and thanked me because it shed some light on why he's so different than others. i should...

If you like foreign bands or whatever, you'll probably love Têtes Raides. They're up there in the top 5 bands i listen to. I just wish they'd tour the US, because i really don't feel like going to...

I'm pretty excited to see zee pixies in chicago. i'm tempted to see them more than one date, but i'm a pretty broke folk.

i bet you don't hate your receptionist paycheck.

And its not that bad. you fuck around all day and answer phone calls and the door.
It only gets shitty when someone is on the phone in a panic...

way back when, when i was in high school, my AP test score didn't transfer to my college. So i basically wasted $80

i'd say verizon.
I used to have AT&T and my calls were constantly dropped. I wasn't able to get signal in my house and it was just a shitty provider in general. I vaguely thought about going back to...

woulda been cooler if Barack was speaking instead.

like i even look at the arcade fire thread.

<object width="480" height="295"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/n495Tn7jn-w&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess"...

as far as food went, i stuck to places like the Hard Rock and Planet Hollywood. i know...not exactly english.

Theres a restaurant near Trafalgar Square that i went to called the Texas Embassy. They serve mexican food, and apparently that place, before it was a mexican restaurant, sold titanic tickets. i...

I live in the Chicago area, whenever i venture into the city i'm always clueless on what to do. So if you find anything cool to do, LET ME KNOW.
This time of year is kind of an awkward time anyway....

I went to London a couple years ago. It was really expensive. There aren't any huge cultural differences, although i think the english are nicer than americans. Riding the underground is super easy....

rofl. okay.

ps-you should go too

i'm seeing ratatat on monday in Chicago.

i'm not going. because i'm a broke folk. and i have finals the week following.

I had a roommate who left a bloody tampon in the toilet. I had my other roommate sit down with her and teach her bathroom etiquette.

And then another roommate would always call me asking where i...

Anyone else?

I got stuck in an elevator at the MGM in Las Vegas for an hour. Hella got comp'd though.

it's not a personal experience. it's a website. fmylife.com

i don't have one of those.

"Today, I got a "save the date" card for the wedding of a couple my husband knows. I was excited because I really wish to be better friends with these people. I emailed the bride, "I got your STD!"...

awe, man! Todd Palin didn't come in 1st in the dog race? i was really rootin' for him, but i guess somebody's gotta lose, and that somebody was him.

i wonder if this is the same thing, or maybe water buffalo are starting to stand up for themselves.
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/448983/buffalos_attack_lions/

I read one guy's ad, who listed his former profession as 'street pharmacist'
that made me giggle out loud.

i'd write someone, but i'd be scared they'd get out of prison and hunt my ass down. Or have their crew come find me.

Don't let Frankie aka samiksha do your homework. you'll fail, like i did.

SOMEONE DO MY TAXES. i'll pay you 5 bucks. Maybe 10 if you get me a good return.

that pizza sounds god awful. i'll stick to my chicago style deep dish.

i did it, but i really don't know what constitutes a 'smart' phone. i have an lg dare, whether that's smart or not...i do not know.

want me to call the WHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAmbulance for you?

who said i was your broseph?!

and the jaeger was stupendous.

flava flav is such a tool.

I got drunk last night by myself. It's far less interesting than it really was. i had two beers and roughly 10 shots of jaeger. my life RULES.

my dad looks like Mr. White from resevoir dogs. no shit.

http://videodetective.com/photos/097/004108_78.jpg

here's mine..

http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/2008/09/23-End/brad-pitt-and-angelina-jolie.jpg

we're in a RECESSION here. i can't afford that nonsense.

that actually looks really good!

http://www.techotic.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/hair-hats2.jpg

http://www.dailyhaha.com/_pics/hair_hat.jpg