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This is the mark of a studio band -- a band created and defined by their engineer rather than by their own musicianship. I expect it of Justin Bieber and that ilk; I expect more from Coachella bands....

3 perfect reminders of why your cell phone should stay in your fucking pocket:

1) The first minute of this video is dominated by some dipshit's cell phone as he's videoing the concert.
2) The...

There's only 1 behavior I find annoying at shows: Talking. I can't believe how many chicks stand at a fucking show and just chat loudly like there's nothing going on around them. SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP....

The guys next to us last year left their tent wide open every day, with iphones and laptops just sitting out for the world to see (and they were at the end of the row, where there was heavy foot...

Seriously.

How 'bout training them on how to recognize sunblock. One of those dickheads last year confiscated my sunblock because, after smelling it, he insisted it was vodka.

The point is, if one of these...

Seriously. These are the 2 bands I was most stoked for, and now can only see 1 of them. Grrr.

Since this thread has already been bumped, and since others coming this year might also have this question:

Yes, hard alcohol is served in the beer gardens (not just in VIP). Last year I ordered a...

*Jello Biafra
*Modest Mouse

These are my only 2 "must sees." But there's a very long list of "very much looking forward to seeing" including Wu Tang, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Violent Femmes, HTDA, & Bat...

Saw Puscifer in Las Vegas not too long ago. They sounded amazing, but every time Maynard sang, I wanted to hear Tool or Perfect Circle. Frustrating.

Carina's great, though.

Ya'll don't realize that Dre was a MAJOR sponsor of Coachella last year -- that's why the Beats logo was pasted on every-fucking-thing inside the venue. The "blank check" he got was signed by...

While I realize that this is GV's definition of a "professional" camera, only an idiot would agree. Even copying and pasting this sentence made me just a little stupider.

While a case could have...

Both fests should be embarrassed to give Phoenix a stage.

1) loop duct tape around leg
2) Loop other end of duct tape around cooler handle
3) Repeat on other side with similarly heavy object
4) Problem solved, McGuyver-style -- no stakes necessary

I fail to see the slightest difference in picking 1 over the other, except that I bought my Weekend 2 tickets in about 30 seconds while people online were bitching about waiting hours to get Weekend...

YOU FORGOT NOT TO WEAR HIGH HEELS!

Just listened to yet another sound-alike Phoenix album.

It's cool of GV to give us a Saturday headliner worthy of leaving the show and taking a shower on Saturday night. I just hope the line isn't...

*Social D is terrible, but I'm hopeful that they're good live (I heard a live Mike Ness album and it sounded way better than SD, but his between-song raps were retarded and embarrassing).
...

We camped next to an ice truck last year, and it was awesome. The generator noise drowned out everything else and I slept like a baby.

More on topic, our neighbors were very nice raver kids from...

"Getting dosed via spray bottle!!1!" is the new version of "Some dude gave me a joint and it was LACED!!1!"

If it happened as often as people claim, we'd be living in a sea of LSD, un-laced weed...

Apparently the 'boardies' are for dickless jerkoffs to tell you what the 'boardies' are for. How very meta of these 'boardies.'

I like the part where Ferris Bueller was bitch-slapping Lance Armstrong.

And ARE shit everywhere else. I just burned my sombrero after hearing this.

If you don't shower between 8 and 11 in the morning -- when EVERYONE else does -- there's no line. I've never waited in line to shower, and never even saw anyone else showering at the same time I...

I'm fascinated. In what way would the presence of this flag make the show more enjoyable for you or anyone else?

This is the thing to do. I've heard of people having point-and-shoot cameras with larger lenses not be allowed in. The guards know jack shit about what they're supposed to allow and not allow. (And...

Problem: The only time you'll need AC in your tent is very early in the morning. Who exactly is going to get up and plug the AC in at the crack of dawn? (That's a rhetorical question; clearly it will...

Murphys are just Pogues wannabes, but that's just my opinion. (Also: I expect them to be a very good show, but that's just my prediction.)

Yeah, pretty weak. Chili Peppers have some good stuff, but they don't deliver live (unless old age has improved them substantially). Fortunately there are over a dozen other bands to be excited...

Red Hot Chili Peppers may not be Sahara Bro, but they're definitely Bro.

Word of warning: Last year, a fatass old security guy took my spray-on sunblock on the last day, insisting I had filled it with vodka (I'm 40 -- I can BUY vodka). He wasn't impressed by my...