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View Full Version : You are alone on a desert island...



Stefinitely Maybe
03-13-2007, 09:41 AM
Which would you choose?

http://img453.imageshack.us/img453/5164/full125083mt2.jpg

caco0283
03-13-2007, 09:54 AM
wow thats a great question

mob roulette
03-13-2007, 09:55 AM
i hate to say it but it's got to be the fish head. for several obvious reasons.

SheriNOIR
03-13-2007, 09:57 AM
A reverse mermaid looks too scary.
At least she'd have hands..

x

bartelby
03-13-2007, 09:58 AM
no way....there's still plenty of options with the top side

caco0283
03-13-2007, 09:59 AM
hands??? who cares about the hands....she can breath under water can you imagine the great head you would get

bmack86
03-13-2007, 09:59 AM
reverse mermaid would be a waste. She'd have to stay in water the whole time or else she couldn't breath, and she'd die off quickly because she'd be too slow and awkward to get food.

Alchemy
03-13-2007, 10:02 AM
I want to talk to my mermaid afterwards.

TomAz
03-13-2007, 10:03 AM
no way....there's still plenty of options with the top side

yeah that, plus the fact that the fish is ugly as all getout and probably not much of a conversationalist, steered my vote to the regular mermaid.

bartelby
03-13-2007, 10:04 AM
I want to talk to my mermaid afterwards.

LOL

gaypalmsprings
03-13-2007, 10:10 AM
I prefer Clint the Cowboy Merman....

http://us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/laraines_1941_14349815

semisonic
03-13-2007, 10:19 AM
Reverse mermain for me. Those fish lips don't look so bad to me. Also, only the top half has to stay in the water. Since this thread has obvious female-objectification, I'll add that if I were gay, I would prefer a reverse Clint the Cowboy, too: fish on top, cowboy on the bottom. Now if you had an amphibious alternative, that would really be the way to go.

TomAz
03-13-2007, 10:23 AM
http://www.jamesmarsh.com/image/frog_lady.jpg

caco0283
03-13-2007, 10:28 AM
fish on top, cowboy on the bottom. Now if you had an amphibious alternative, that would really be the way to go.

another man's penis is gross by itself...but another man's penis with a fish head makes me what to puke

i would like to add that the reverse mermaid would be distgusting becaue you are going to be smelling fish the whole time which reminds me of herpes

Hannahrain
03-13-2007, 10:30 AM
It's also probably worth mentioning that the life span of the average fish is much shorter than the life span of the average hot chick. You might at some point be hanging out with a really nice pair of living legs connected to a dead fish.


Plus the regular mermaid would be able to talk. She probably could tell you how the fuck to get off the island.

TomAz
03-13-2007, 10:33 AM
You might at some point be hanging out with a really nice pair of living legs connected to a dead fish.


...


i would like to add that the reverse mermaid would be distgusting becaue you are going to be smelling fish the whole time which reminds me of herpes

mob roulette
03-13-2007, 10:37 AM
regular mermaids don't have vaginas. but ok. whatever.

unless it's like daryl hannah in splash where she can dry off and grow legs and girly parts. if it's THAT type of mermaid then i'm in.

great question, btw. i feel absolutely disgusted with myself but great question.

caco0283
03-13-2007, 10:42 AM
egular mermaids don't have vaginas. but ok. whatever.



who cares about the vagina....you can deep throat her for as long as you want because she wont have to stop for air!!!!!

kreutz2112
03-13-2007, 10:52 AM
I would take the top half. I agree with caco. Head under water would be excellent. She also has, eyes, ears and nostrils, which out number the bottom holes 7 to 2.

John Peel is My Co-pilot
03-13-2007, 11:02 AM
Regular mermaid for me. She looks at least human, I don't think I could fuck a fish (to paraphrase Steve Martin).
Plus she has hands and a mouth for the pleasure part, and a great target for a pearl necklace!

invisiblerobots
03-13-2007, 11:50 AM
MerMAN!
http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b38/Hera_f/mermannn.jpg

SojuGorae
03-13-2007, 12:05 PM
Neither. Imagine the damage your dick would take from the scaled pussy of a mermaid. No thanks.

I'd just have sex with animals once I go completely insane from being alone on a deserted island.

Hannahrain
03-13-2007, 12:07 PM
Imagine the damage your dick would take from the scaled pussy of a mermaid.


I imagine it'd be just as bad as the damage it would take from the nonexistent one.

caco0283
03-13-2007, 12:29 PM
Imagine the damage your dick would take from the scaled pussy of a mermaid.

its no worst than a girl with herpes

SojuGorae
03-13-2007, 01:59 PM
its no worst than a girl with herpes

True, but according to commercials for Herpecin-L, one can lead a normal life riding bicycles on the beach and running along nature trails with your herpes companion.

Hannahrain
03-13-2007, 02:00 PM
True, but according to commercials for Herpecin-L, one can lead a normal life riding bicycles on the beach and running along nature trails with your herpes companion.

And yet you've NEVER seen someone on tv riding a bike or jogging a trail with a fish-headed companion.

Coincidence? I think not.

omg wtf bbq
03-13-2007, 02:04 PM
regular

kimery08
03-13-2007, 02:05 PM
who cares about the vagina....you can deep throat her for as long as you want because she wont have to stop for air!!!!!

that has nothing to do with her gag reflexes.

luveebunni08
03-13-2007, 02:07 PM
i heart this thread!

caco0283
03-13-2007, 02:08 PM
that has nothing to do with her gag reflexes

thats a good point only if you care about her gagging or not

codytwo
03-13-2007, 02:11 PM
A mermaid would be able to rescue your stranded ass, as they are well-documented to be very good at it. A fucking reverse mermaid is just a monstrous freak of nature that, in all likelihood, would be soul-less and possibly threatening.

kimery08
03-13-2007, 02:13 PM
thats a good point only if you care about her gagging or not

true. but if you dont care about her gag reflexes then you shouldnt care about vomit on your dick, or her just being pissed and swimming away.

caco0283
03-13-2007, 02:15 PM
if she swims away ill just lay in the water naked as bait


okay im done with this conversation

jackstraw94086
03-13-2007, 03:04 PM
dalethethug and semisonic are ichthyophiles

bumper31
03-13-2007, 03:16 PM
A typical English 40 something, having split from his latest girlfriend, decided to take a vacation.
He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.
He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.
After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore.
In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?"
She replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island.
I landed here when my cruise ship sank."
"Amazing," he notes. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you."
"Oh, this thing?" explains the woman. "I made the boat out of raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree."
"But, where did you get the tools?"
"Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile iron. I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware."
The guy is stunned.
"Let's row over to my place," she says.
After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck.
As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much but I call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like a drink?"
"No! No thank you," he blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take another drop of coconut juice."
"It's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a still. How would you like a Pina Colada?"
Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable.
Would you like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet."
No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet, a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism.
"This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?"
When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines, strategically positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit down next to her. "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've been out here for many
months. You've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for?" She stares into his eyes.

He can't believe what he's hearing.
"You mean . . " he swallows excitedly and tears start to form in his eyes.

"Don't tell me you've got Sky Sports!!?" <----Insert ESPN here for you crazy americans

codytwo
03-13-2007, 03:22 PM
What the fuck is Sky Sports?

TomAz
03-13-2007, 03:27 PM
It's like ESPN except it shows cricket and motorcycle racing.

John Peel is My Co-pilot
03-13-2007, 03:30 PM
What the fuck is Sky Sports?


It's Fox Sports (owned by Murdoch) in the UK.

codytwo
03-13-2007, 03:32 PM
fuckin Brits just wont die....

jackstraw94086
03-13-2007, 04:04 PM
well did you ask them nicely? i doubt it.

jimmycrackcorn
03-13-2007, 04:53 PM
regular mermaid:thu

PotVsKtl
03-13-2007, 04:55 PM
Jesus you fucking idiots, you ride the mermaid to the mainland. So you take the half that can communicate.

PotVsKtl
03-13-2007, 04:58 PM
I'm apparently the only one who doesn't immediately fantasize about wrapping a festering flounder steak around their johnson the second nobody is watching.

John Peel is My Co-pilot
03-13-2007, 05:42 PM
I'm apparently the only one who doesn't immediately fantasize about wrapping a festering flounder steak around their johnson the second nobody is watching.

You prefer to do it in full view of everyone?

That shit's just wrong...

jerpar24
03-13-2007, 06:41 PM
I Love This Thread

Popcynical
03-13-2007, 06:50 PM
I can deal with blowjobs and handjobs. I won't fuck a fish.

Hannahrain
03-13-2007, 06:56 PM
All you fellas are being pretty presumptuous in assuming that this mermaid/fishhead/whatev even wants to sleep with you in the first place. She's half human, half fish. Plenty of fish in the sea. Literally. The girl [thing?] has options.

fober
03-13-2007, 07:05 PM
A lot more holes on the regular mermaid.

full on idle
03-13-2007, 07:12 PM
gross

La Ferrassie
03-13-2007, 07:13 PM
I can deal with blowjobs and handjobs. I won't fuck a fish.

Same thing here.

codytwo
03-13-2007, 07:24 PM
All you fellas are being pretty presumptuous in assuming that this mermaid/fishhead/whatev even wants to sleep with you in the first place. She's half human, half fish. Plenty of fish in the sea. Literally. The girl [thing?] has options.

I'm thinking that a half-fish/half-human is gonna take it whenever he or she can get it. Although, chances are the normal mermaid will want to be a stupid flirty cunt about things. You know how mermaids are, beckoning you longingly into the deep and all that shit.

Hannahrain
03-13-2007, 07:35 PM
Keep in mind I'm a female. What the hell does the fish head/woman legs have to offer me? I'd be much better off with the girl for the top half. Although if the mermaid is as needy and naive as she looks in that picture, I'd rather be stranded by myself, thank you very much.

Yablonowitz
03-13-2007, 07:37 PM
who cares about the vagina....you can deep throat her for as long as you want because she wont have to stop for air!!!!!

Wait. What makes you so sure a regular mermaid doesn't need to breath air? I would assume that because their upper torso is human, they don't have gills so therefore, would need to breath air.

Secondly, both options disgust me because I can't stand the smell of fish AND, if you look at that regular mermaid, she looks like she has smaller boobs than zzz...and that she's about 12. So there's a dirty pervert thing going on and not much in the way for comfortable booby sex. The fish head thing would be flat out impossible to live with for a wide variety of reasons. The breathing issue for example means that the thing would have to be in the water at all times. Plus, the head of a fish is one of the least arousing images outside of the bug world.
Now...if it were a goat head...well...

Popcynical
03-13-2007, 07:37 PM
Keep in mind I'm a female. What the hell does the fish head/woman legs have to offer me? I'd be much better off with the girl for the top half. Although if the mermaid is as needy and naive as she looks in that picture, I'd rather be stranded by myself, thank you very much.

You could ... eat it.

Yablonowitz
03-13-2007, 07:39 PM
I'm apparently the only one who doesn't immediately fantasize about wrapping a festering flounder steak around their johnson the second nobody is watching.

The hypothetical scenario is asking what you would prefer as a companion. There's an unspoken assumption that you will be stuck with this creature, that you will not be able to leave the island, and it will be the opposite sex or...for the purposes of this conversation...will be the sex you are most attracted to.

La Ferrassie
03-13-2007, 07:39 PM
I wonder if making out with a fish head would taste like sushi?

PotVsKtl
03-13-2007, 07:43 PM
I don't believe in unspoken assumptions. I'm riding that bitch to freedom.

Hannahrain
03-13-2007, 07:46 PM
You could ... eat it.

No. To both the blatant meaning and the double entendre.

Popcynical
03-13-2007, 07:49 PM
No. To both the blatant meaning and the double entendre.

:D

...

codytwo
03-13-2007, 08:09 PM
hahahahahahaha

gaypalmsprings
03-13-2007, 08:30 PM
kiss me...

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/tennis/news/2001/09/24/mailbag/limpet.jpg

vinylmartyr
03-13-2007, 08:32 PM
Mermaids have butt holes right?

Popcynical
03-13-2007, 08:33 PM
They defecate through their ears.

Yablonowitz
03-13-2007, 10:36 PM
Jesus you fucking idiots, you ride the mermaid to the mainland. So you take the half that can communicate.

How do you know you'll be able to successfully communicate with her? Do mermaids speak English? Plus, you don't know how far away you are from land and riding on that so-called bitch of yours could be slow and laborous, not to mention potentially life threatening to her. You start riding that chick for a couple of hours and you're going to be one fucking heavy load and she might just say, "fuck it, there's no benefit to carrying this guy. I don't have a vagina, so he can't pleasure me when I get there and he's starting to strain my dorsal fin." Then she plunks you in the middle of the ocean. Not so sure you've thought this through, sizzle chest.

invisiblerobots
03-13-2007, 11:44 PM
Ya know, I once read a fascinating story about a dude gettin' it on with a dolphin...

caco0283
03-14-2007, 06:41 AM
Wait. What makes you so sure a regular mermaid doesn't need to breath air? I would assume that because their upper torso is human, they don't have gills so therefore, would need to breath air.

um greg, didn't you watch the little mermaid???



How do you know you'll be able to successfully communicate with her? Do mermaids speak English? Plus, you don't know how far away you are from land and riding on that so-called bitch of yours could be slow and laborous, not to mention potentially life threatening to her. You start riding that chick for a couple of hours and you're going to be one fucking heavy load and she might just say, "fuck it, there's no benefit to carrying this guy.


that reminds me of a few nights ago

jimmycrackcorn
03-14-2007, 07:19 AM
[QUOTE sizzle chest.[/QUOTE]

wow haven't heard the jerky boys in FOREVER

PotVsKtl
03-14-2007, 10:39 AM
How do you know you'll be able to successfully communicate with her? Do mermaids speak English? Plus, you don't know how far away you are from land and riding on that so-called bitch of yours could be slow and laborous, not to mention potentially life threatening to her. You start riding that chick for a couple of hours and you're going to be one fucking heavy load and she might just say, "fuck it, there's no benefit to carrying this guy. I don't have a vagina, so he can't pleasure me when I get there and he's starting to strain my dorsal fin." Then she plunks you in the middle of the ocean. Not so sure you've thought this through, sizzle chest.

In case you hadn't heard the news, man is the dominant force on this earth and any other. I wonder why you see so few mermaids these days? Oh, that's right, because they're scared pissless of our manfaces. A mermaid will do what it's told and it will do it cheerfully or it will feel the full brute brunt force of our manboots in its underwater pleasure domes.

blakely
03-14-2007, 10:42 AM
In case you hadn't heard the news, man is the dominant force on this earth and any other. I wonder why you see so few mermaids these days? Oh, that's right, because they're scared pissless of our manfaces. A mermaid will do what it's told and it will do it cheerfully or it will feel the full brute brunt force of our manboots in its underwater pleasure domes.


https://dragonpharmacy.com/images/products/xanax.gif

TomAz
03-14-2007, 10:42 AM
plus, they're good eatin'.

caco0283
03-14-2007, 10:42 AM
plus women are supposed to listen to men

Hannahrain
03-15-2007, 12:39 AM
For all the people who answered reverse mermaid:

Would your answer change if you could choose anyone in the world to be the top half of your mermaid? Like your girlfriend, or halle berry or something.

For that matter, would everyone else change if they could choose their fish?

blakely
03-16-2007, 08:17 AM
For all the people who answered reverse mermaid:

Would your answer change if you could choose anyone in the world to be the top half of your mermaid? Like your girlfriend, or halle berry or something.

For that matter, would everyone else change if they could choose their fish?

Probably an Elisha Cuthbert/Shark. As sharks arent scaly which is a big selling point. Or maybe a Sophia Bush/Dolphin.

UnicornsForBreakfast
03-16-2007, 02:45 PM
I'd take scaly over sandpapery any day.

DeltaSigChi4
03-16-2007, 02:53 PM
Is this thread official?

E

Hannahrain
03-16-2007, 03:01 PM
Probably an Elisha Cuthbert/Shark. As sharks arent scaly which is a big selling point. Or maybe a Sophia Bush/Dolphin.

Blakely, you misunderstand. I was giving the option for people to choose either their top human half, or their top fish half. The other half is completely random. If you'd rather pick the bottom half because there is some weird fish tail that turns you on, go right ahead. But you only get to pick one half.

P.S. a dolphin is not a fish.

kimery08
03-16-2007, 03:22 PM
do these mermaids have special skin that doesnt get wrinkly and soggy when in water for an extended period of time?

Hannahrain
03-16-2007, 03:26 PM
Kimery, if you bother your mermaid with incessant questions she's not gonna stick around.

La Ferrassie
03-16-2007, 06:05 PM
I don't think mermaids get wrinkly. The little mermaid would look like a grandma.

sydaud
03-17-2007, 06:22 AM
Merman...cough, cough.....merman

bumper31
03-17-2007, 07:10 AM
Merman...cough, cough.....merman

Aren't they in Utah?

starbright777
03-20-2007, 10:19 AM
Numbers 15:39

You will have these tassels to look at and so you will remember all the commands of the LORD, that you may obey them and not prostitute yourselves by going after the lusts of your own hearts and eyes.

gaypalmsprings
03-20-2007, 10:27 AM
Numbers 15:39

You will have these tassels to look at and so you will remember all the commands of the LORD, that you may obey them and not prostitute yourselves by going after the lusts of your own hearts and eyes.

sicko