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weareyourfriends
02-26-2011, 11:11 AM
Hi boardies. I like to start with a disclaimer *I tried searching to see if any similar threads already exist, and I havenít found any. So I hope I donít gross you all out too much but this thread is dedicated to poo in relation to Coachella and all other elements of life.

Itís nearly impossible for me to go number 2 in public places or where I am sharing the bathroom with a group of people. At first I thought I was a freak for being this way but it turns out that plenty of other people share this condition.

I will be sharing a small condo with about 5 other people for Coachella this year, and I know tons of you will be in a similar situation (sharing condos, hotels, houses, etc). Usually I get my own hotel room but last year I stayed with tons of my friends, and not being able to go really put a damper on my experience. I feel like this is the perfect place to share with people who go to festivals all over the world, couch surf, and simply donít give a crap about taking a crap!

Iíd also like to add that Iím going away to college in late August where Iíll have to share a bathroom with roommates and others on my floor. I simply have to get over this condition and Iíd like to hear from people who have similar stories or suggestions of how to just get over myself.

Thanks y'all!

bottomfeeder
02-26-2011, 01:14 PM
Usually I get my own hotel room but last year I stayed with tons of my friends, and not being able to go really put a damper on my experience.

YOu held it for the entire weekend last year??? BRAVO!!!

The problem with hotel rooms is the walls are thin and circulation poor, so everyone can hear each "poop," "splash," "gurgle," "splorch," "brrrrrrrrraatt!!!" Not to mention the smell, which after a day filled with heinekin, spicy pie, and various insults can be intense. My point is, nobody enjoys dropping a steaming deuce in a hotel room full of friends. Every one in the room understands this. They are your friends. At some point you are just going to have to man-up (or woman-up) and DO IT.

Godspeed.

rskapcat
02-26-2011, 01:45 PM
Flush as often as necessary while taking care of business. Gets rid of the waste and smell. You won't leave behind any evidence, and your friends will be thankful for the non-stinky bathroom. Eat foods that keep things moving (especially at breakfast at least an hour before you plan on heading to the festival) so you can take care of business quickly. Bonus: That will also keep you from having to crap in a PortaPotty while at the festival.

menikmati
02-26-2011, 01:51 PM
I've never gone at Coachella, and I've been attending since 2005.

JustSteve
02-26-2011, 01:56 PM
really? those air conditioned trailers are heaven, especially early in the day.

LickTheLizzard
02-26-2011, 01:58 PM
shhhh

Stickjohn
02-26-2011, 02:04 PM
I need to digest this topic a little more before dispensing my pearls of wisdom, but I'll ask a related question:

Does it bother the ladies that the portapotties cut down on the social aspect of going to the lavatory in groups?

ivankay
02-26-2011, 02:05 PM
Figuring out the source of your embarrasment will free you to poo anywhere and anytime. - fortune cookie

thom cobain
02-26-2011, 02:25 PM
when we used to share one bathroom in our hotel room, we made trips to the lobby.

SoulDischarge
02-26-2011, 02:37 PM
Far more embarrassing than the act itself is the fact that you're an adult person using the term "poo."

bonerfromgrowingpains
02-26-2011, 02:39 PM
i have a similar problem, as i dont like for anyone to be in the same hotel room, and i like to take my time...you can't rush perfection.

that being said, with all of my travel experience, and the sharing of hotel rooms with others, the secret for me seems to be turning on the shower. it seems to "take away" the smell, and no one can hear you.

good luck

daxton
02-26-2011, 02:44 PM
Oh, so that's why you took so many showers.

bonerfromgrowingpains
02-26-2011, 02:45 PM
^exactly...i was wondering how long it would take for you to chime in. no one as unkept as me bathes that much...c'mon.

daxton
02-26-2011, 02:47 PM
You do know this is my secret too, right?

bonerfromgrowingpains
02-26-2011, 02:48 PM
^do we know each other? who are you?

daxton
02-26-2011, 02:50 PM
I'm going to punch you.

gaypalmsprings
02-26-2011, 02:52 PM
So you are poo shy. Get over it.

PlayaDelWes
02-26-2011, 02:54 PM
So what are the Related Issues?

gaypalmsprings
02-26-2011, 02:55 PM
http://funnypics.skooby.com/assets/images/10-01-08_funny_poop_34-1.jpg


http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2008/10/11/128682617147642377.jpg

frizzlefry
02-26-2011, 03:07 PM
http://images.amazon.com/images/P/0916291456.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_.gif
I don't know if you've heard of this but it's a fantastic read. It helped me get over all of the problems you listed by the time I was four. It's pretty easy to find so I'm surprised that alot of you are still having problems with taking a shit.

Theijuiel
02-26-2011, 03:26 PM
What about those who can't piss if there is no divider between urinals? If I really have to go, I can do it. Otherwise I'll just stand there with my dick in my hand waiting for nothing.

gaypalmsprings
02-26-2011, 03:34 PM
Like they had to indicate this was for men.

http://www.saynotocrack.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/03/chinese-outdoor-urinal.jpg

Stickjohn
02-26-2011, 04:01 PM
So you are poo shy. Get over it.

Or don't. And learn to make do.

Stickjohn
02-26-2011, 04:02 PM
I really hope Hannah posts in this thread.

TomAz
02-26-2011, 04:14 PM
not being able to go really put a damper on my experience

um, yeah, I bet.

I'm calling shenanigans on this thread. I think the guy is, um, full of shit.

gaypalmsprings
02-26-2011, 04:16 PM
not being able to go really put a Pamper on my experience.

fixed

Stickjohn
02-26-2011, 06:40 PM
I might have to get you this shirt Josh.

http://www.topatoco.com/graphics/00000001/hiji-unicornpoop.gif

sbessiso
02-26-2011, 06:44 PM
So what are the Related Issues?

When he starts taking it in the butt.


um, yeah, I bet.

I'm calling shenanigans on this thread. I think the guy is, um, full of shit.

He's not. Well he is, but he's not.

choice cat
02-26-2011, 06:54 PM
Get a little buzz on before going, you will all of a sudden care less

fetuspiniata
02-26-2011, 07:17 PM
Me and my buddys have an ongoing bet each year for who can make it the longest without pooing.(I always lose by friday night! lol) We've grown accustomed to refering to the act as "losing the bet". And now whenever we're on roadtrips or out and about it isnt uncommonto hear "can we pull over soon? i need to lose the bet!" :P

daxton
02-26-2011, 07:21 PM
I like that story, Tom.

choice cat
02-26-2011, 07:25 PM
nice story

BROKENDOLL
02-26-2011, 07:31 PM
um, yeah, I bet.

I'm calling shenanigans on this thread. I think the guy is, um, full of shit.
You know, I could have been the 1st reply and was going to say the same thing. Instead, I went searching for bashful poopers thinking I'd find some helpful tips...You wouldn't believe the shit out there on the internet!

ivankay
02-26-2011, 08:22 PM
Is it unhealthy to hold in your poop? (http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100222102257AAQzTXp)

daxton
02-26-2011, 08:32 PM
Sometimes, when schedules get all out of wack, like on a vacation, your bowels get crazy too and just seem to shut down. So, the fact that people are needing to go regularly during Coachella is surprising to me.

weareyourfriends
02-26-2011, 09:48 PM
I might have to get you this shirt Josh.

http://www.topatoco.com/graphics/00000001/hiji-unicornpoop.gif

Ahahaha love the shirt!!!

And thanks for the responses everyone... I'm thinking that I might just try getting to the festival as soon as they let everyone in on the Friday and take a dump then... but this doesn't really help with a long-term solution which is kinda what I'm searching for...

I'm strongly considering hypnotherapy and other desensitizing activities. I recently went in an airport bathroom but it was still pretty difficult for me :/

mehh

Hannahrain
02-27-2011, 09:44 AM
Otherwise I'll just stand there with my dick in my hand waiting for nothing.

Are you guys fucking kidding me? Nobody? Nothing? This isn't the board I joined.

- How long did it take the waterpark's security officer to have you removed?

- I don't think it works if you cut the hole yourself.

- That's not a zaftig steampunk fembot, Juiel, it's a crate of auto parts. You're going to need to calm down.

Really, people. Really.

Hannahrain
02-27-2011, 09:49 AM
Caption contest. Make your own.

Mugwog
02-27-2011, 05:52 PM
Ahahaha love the shirt!!!

And thanks for the responses everyone... I'm thinking that I might just try getting to the festival as soon as they let everyone in on the Friday and take a dump then... but this doesn't really help with a long-term solution which is kinda what I'm searching for...

I'm strongly considering hypnotherapy and other desensitizing activities. I recently went in an airport bathroom but it was still pretty difficult for me :/

mehh

STARBUCKS BATHROOM - usually they are single units that are locked and are kept pretty clean. Indio has quite a few coffee shops that popped up all over since Coachella helped developed the city. Several years of camping has taught me to take a drive thru Indio during the day, charge up my phone at an ATT store(they also have great AC during the day) and take a crap/homeless shower at a local coffee shop. Just tip em for not being dicks about it.

This way you can crap every day in solitude, bring a magazine, that always helps the flow. I find smoking a bowl also helps me make a quicker deuce.

weareyourfriends
02-27-2011, 06:09 PM
^ A+ suggestion! I love Starbucks bathrooms now that I think of it! I'll definitely try to spot some of those more private, gender neutral bathrooms.

The only thing is that I'm not trying to live with my neurosis; I'm trying to get rid of it all together... I want to be a hippy and poo wherever/whenever.

:(

Mugwog
02-27-2011, 06:14 PM
I dont shit at coachella thats disgusting. Don't feel bad.

choice cat
02-27-2011, 07:08 PM
bring toilet paper to campsite.

Radiohead
02-27-2011, 10:49 PM
I guess this is the appropriate place for this: I generally go every day, but at Coachella the past two years, I've only had the urge once the entire three-day festival. I wonder if my body subconsciously knows I'd prefer not to have to go as often...or maybe it's the Spicey Pie...

SoulDischarge
02-28-2011, 01:33 AM
Are you guys fucking kidding me? Nobody? Nothing? This isn't the board I joined.

- How long did it take the waterpark's security officer to have you removed?

- I don't think it works if you cut the hole yourself.

- That's not a zaftig steampunk fembot, Juiel, it's a crate of auto parts. You're going to need to calm down.

Really, people. Really.

Most people willing to put forth the effort of wit and the like are too clever to click on this thread.

BROKENDOLL
02-28-2011, 08:26 AM
What about those who can't piss if there is no divider between urinals? If I really have to go, I can do it. Otherwise I'll just stand there with my dick in my hand waiting for nothing.


Most people willing to put forth the effort of wit and the like are too clever to click on this thread.
Not necessarily, Patrick... I could have given Theijuiel a lot of shit for standing there with his dick in his hand like some jerkoff, but I figured I'd get shit on for doing so. So, poo-poop-ado!

weareyourfriends
02-28-2011, 12:55 PM
Most people willing to put forth the effort of wit and the like are too clever to click on this thread.

Why is this? Everyone poops and has there own experiences. Whether you have suggestions or just stories about not being able to shit, they'd be appreciated.

Please dish yall!

LickTheLizzard
02-28-2011, 01:06 PM
bGk31fzle48

nosurprises12
02-28-2011, 02:15 PM
bGk31fzle48

Bwahaha, that's just too funny

greghead
02-28-2011, 02:21 PM
Two words for those poop-shy folks who are staying in hotels: Lobby Bathroom. Just about every non-shitty hotel has a lobby bathroom.

weareyourfriends
03-02-2011, 09:39 AM
^ yeah, I'm with you on that. I don't have a problem with the lobby bathroom but it sucks when everyone else is trying to go at the same time as you before the fest. Everyone shitting together :/ Still it's a good suggestion. I would probably go down before going to sleep to avoid the morning rush.

weareyourfriends
03-05-2011, 01:28 PM
Has anyone here ever had a terrible summer camp experience? Shared a bathroom with people during college?

eh?

nosurprises12
03-05-2011, 02:08 PM
I don't know about the rest of you, but I've found that the general cleanliness of the port-o-potties has improved dramatically over the past year or two in the campgrounds, as they are being cleaned out on a much more regular basis. Last year I just waited for the truck to go by (we happened to be relatively close to a row of bathrooms) and clean things out and BOOM!, a much better overall pooping experience (i.e. no nasty smell, fresh TP, clean floor, etc.).

As for pooping offsite, the Subway right by the 10 freeway entrance on Monroe has been my go-to place on Monday's for the last 5 years. It has a huge, clean bathroom, and is the perfect pit-stop before I drove back into LA (there are two gas stations right there as well if you need to gas up before hitting the road).

weareyourfriends
03-05-2011, 02:11 PM
I don't know about the rest of you, but I've found that the general cleanliness of the port-o-potties has improved dramatically over the past year or two in the campgrounds, as they are being cleaned out on a much more regular basis. Last year I just waited for the truck to go by (we happened to be relatively close to a row of bathrooms) and clean things out and BOOM!, a much better overall pooping experience (i.e. no nasty smell, fresh TP, clean floor, etc.)

I think I'm going to try getting into the festival early enough each day so that I can find an unused Port-o-Potty

nosurprises12
03-05-2011, 02:12 PM
Yeah, I'd recommend that as well. Not only is it cooler temperature-wise in the morning, but whatever has already been "deposited" hasn't had a chance to ferment in the sun yet ;)

weareyourfriends
03-05-2011, 02:16 PM
Yeah, I'd recommend that as well. Not only is it cooler temperature-wise in the morning, but whatever has already been "deposited" hasn't had a chance to ferment in the sun yet ;)

Mhmm. So I guess I never noticed before but... Aren't the potties emptied every day? How can they hold so much shit?!

nosurprises12
03-05-2011, 02:21 PM
Yes, they're emptied every day, but, in my opinion, the regularity of those cleanings has increased dramatically in the past year or two.

Hairyhenderson
03-05-2011, 08:36 PM
I think I'm going to try getting into the festival early enough each day so that I can find an unused Port-o-Potty

That's what I did last year, I got up at 8am almost everyday mainly because of the hot sun beating down and the smell of my own sweat in my tent which was absolutely disgusting.

I don't think its such an irregular thing at all to be a nervous poo-er since it's still a major taboo subject in our society. In combination with opposites sexes (if you are straight) the nervousness is at it's highest as anything to do with poo turns most people off immediately and in most relationships it is a subject which is not spoken of as long as there is a way around speaking about it.

Secondly shitting and pissing are both happening in the lower body area where all your stress and anxiety related issues physically go(i know that might not be 100% anatomically correct) However, when you're stressed or experiencing anxiety it goes directly to your stomach, causing stomache aches and can even lead to ulcers; as it this the area you are taking a shit/piss from it is affected greatly by tension and combining that with the societal taboo and fear of people realizing that you have done the dirty number two equals mental contstipation .

hobomilitia
03-06-2011, 08:35 AM
just eat at taco bell, late at night. that way, when you wake up you will have the runs and have no choice but to face your fear.

Hairyhenderson
03-06-2011, 08:39 AM
I didn't need taco bell for that last year, coachellas burgers and beer made for an interesting mixture though. All i can tell you is that it sucks to have runs at a festival.

weareyourfriends
03-06-2011, 08:41 AM
I didn't need taco bell for that last year, coachellas burgers and beer made for an interesting mixture though. All i can tell you is that it sucks to have runs at a festival.

REALLY Sucks to have the runs in a Porta Potty... Spicy Pie anyone?