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drewdrewdrew
01-31-2009, 03:22 PM
Alright, here goes. Last year, a friend and I had eaten an eigth of shrooms each about an hour before and we were walking from portishead to the sahara (we came back, dont worry) and on the way there were passed this huge shirtless man who was walking the opposite way. All of a sudden he stops, stares at us and as we walk buy he screams "whats it going to take to get you to make out with me?"

Needless to say we got the fuck out of there.

So here it is, share some funny shit.

jdaws
01-31-2009, 05:06 PM
i think this is a good idea for a thread, too bad nobodys posted in it yet!

ok so i got a pretty good one.. it was friday night after my first time rolling (awesome, but a completely different story). we also purchased some xanax, which was promptly snorted after we'd been back at our tent4a while and were desiring a good snooze. i think this was the night that it took me a long time to get to sleep, and i remember that when i woke up in the morning it felt like i hadn't slept a wink. so it was kinda shitty, the xanax didnt really do its job.

but my friend asks me the next day.. lol.. "do you remember pissing on the neighbors tent last night?" i look back with a face of shock and confusion and say noooo! no way!..but apparently my friend had overheard my stream splashing on the neighbors tent, and also voices from the other tent "..ummmm... is someone peeing on our tent?"

i honestly dont remember any of this. but i do have a history of sleep-peeing. lol once i peed on my friends tv and playstation 2.. i guess the xannies stacked on top of the dopamine depletion make increase my tendencies..ugh.

needless to say, we didnt hang out with them very much. SORRY!!!(EMBARASSED EMOTICON DEPICTED HERE)

nothingisnothing
01-31-2009, 06:06 PM
Fun fact: You will die alone

Amneeziac
02-01-2009, 04:19 AM
Cellar door.

Apeskies
02-01-2009, 10:09 AM
=\\\

clumsy342
02-01-2009, 10:20 AM
Here's one.. In 07.. We were still frying at the end of the night and we were wandering around forever, trying to find our parking lot. (that's right.. trying to find the right PARKING LOT). Anyhow, My brother and his girlfriend went to track down a security guard to get directions.
Meanwhile, I turn to my friend Nick and say:
"God.. I just want to sit down right now!"

Immediately after I say this, I turn around and there is a fucking COUCH behind me! It was near the roads/walkways between the parking lots, just fucking sitting there.

I then realized my gift.
I have the ability to manifest furniture at my will.

EDIT:
So we had a seat, figured out where we needed to go, then headed on our merry way.

Apeskies
02-01-2009, 10:23 AM
Here's one.. In 07.. We were still frying at the end of the night and we were wandering around forever, trying to find our parking lot. (that's right.. trying to find the right PARKING LOT). Anyhow, My brother and his girlfriend went to track down a security guard to get directions.
Meanwhile, I turn to my friend Nick and say:
"God.. I just want to sit down right now!"

Immediately after I say this, I turn around and there is a fucking COUCH behind me! It was near the roads/walkways between the parking lots, just fucking sitting there.

I then realized my gift.
I have the ability to manifest furniture at my will.

EDIT:
So we had a seat, figured out where we needed to go, then headed on our merry way.

This can be very useful. Where can I find you???

clumsy342
02-01-2009, 10:25 AM
Look inside your heart.

Apeskies
02-01-2009, 10:30 AM
Very inspiring! That, I will do.

JoshTheBoyd
02-01-2009, 08:29 PM
I then realized my gift.
I have the ability to manifest furniture at my will.


i just visualize a bunch of dope mortal kombat fatalities. perhaps i would be using your power for the dark side

JustSteve
02-01-2009, 08:43 PM
it was pretty funny walking in on this shit...literally!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v97/forgotaboutsteve/crap.jpg

algunz
02-01-2009, 08:53 PM
I can't remember the year, it was the year of the big bug. My husband and I were sitting not far from the bug just relaxing and these 3 kids came over and sat down near us. They kind of circled each other like dogs before they sat. One got up and the other 2 motioned toward him as if they didn't want him to leave, but they didn't have the energy. The one kid wandered toward the churros and the remaining 2 put their heads down in their hands and slowly started rocking back and forth. That was funny.

cansei de ser sexme
02-01-2009, 09:06 PM
there were these young probably barely teenage girls by themselves by the food stands
crying and talking about how their friendship was going downhill...at fucking coachella.

canexplain
02-01-2009, 09:14 PM
i guess these are suppose to be funny drug stories so: me and my sis went to the hollywood bowl to see pink floyd ... we tripped and saw one of the top ten shows i have ever seen .... we get back to her car and she locked the keys in the car ... we lived in La Habra and if you know LA, the bowl is about 25 miles away i think ... we just decided to hitch hike, how hard could that be eh ... we got a couple of short rides and only got about 5 miles .... finally about 330 a milk truck picked us up, one of those that used to deliver milk door to door .... well the driver was a head, so we spent the next 4 hours, tripping and smoking in this van like truck, stopping at what seemed every house in LA .... we just sat in the back, with the door part way open, drank what seemed like gallons of chocolate milk and watched the sun come up .... we didnt get home till like 730 in the morn .... cr****

Apeskies
02-01-2009, 09:26 PM
it was pretty funny walking in on this shit...literally!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v97/forgotaboutsteve/crap.jpg


Iiiiiii just threw up in my mouth a little.

there were these young probably barely teenage girls by themselves by the food stands
crying and talking about how their friendship was going downhill...at fucking coachella.

LOLOLOLLLL

=((((((((((( I dunno why, but this seriously made me laugh.

algunz
02-01-2009, 09:28 PM
I thought these were supposed to be past funny Coachella stories, if it's just past funny stories I got tons of those.

I was walking across campus with my best friend, and she suddenly fell flat on her butt. One second she was there and the next she was ass to cobblestone. We looked back and she had slipped on a banana peel. No joke. I laughed so hard I peed my pants.

Monklish
02-01-2009, 09:29 PM
I remember that portapotty, Steve.


It was delicious.

gooftroop
02-03-2009, 01:04 PM
Funniest thing I saw at Coachella last year is as follows:

During some downtime on the last day of Coachella (always my favorite day) we stopped by the Cubatron for some extreme visual stimulation coupled with extreme relaxation of actually sitting down for a few fucking minutes. Our relaxation was interuppted however when this younger gentleman, who was clearly more fucked up than even I was, stumbled onto the Cubatron. He grabbed the fence and started yelling violently but happily everytime it would change patterns.

"YEEEEAHH!!!" *stares unbelievably hard, like he's looking through it* *change* "YEEEEEEAAAAHHH!!!!!" repeat like 10X

We just started cracking up so hard we could barely contain ourselves. We started joining in on the yelling as did others, so now every time the Cubatron changed this guy was even more into it. I think he literally fell over at one point but was still clutching the fence like he wanted to climb it and get in the Cubatron.

Somehow we had come upon a large pile of blue and orange glowsticks (seriously like 20 just sitting in a pile) so we decided before we left we should go give him some. We walked over there and told him we had a gift for him and proceeded to dump 10 or so glowsticks around where he was sitting. Immediately he grabbed some and

"YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHH" *cubatron change* *turns on a dime and throws a glowstick into the cube* "YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!"

We were hardly able to walk after that we were laughing so hard. Anybody else see this guy? I'll never forget lol

jasonV
02-03-2009, 07:04 PM
i think this is a good idea for a thread, too bad nobodys posted in it yet!

ok so i got a pretty good one.. it was friday night after my first time rolling (awesome, but a completely different story). we also purchased some xanax, which was promptly snorted after we'd been back at our tent4a while and were desiring a good snooze. i think this was the night that it took me a long time to get to sleep, and i remember that when i woke up in the morning it felt like i hadn't slept a wink. so it was kinda shitty, the xanax didnt really do its job.

but my friend asks me the next day.. lol.. "do you remember pissing on the neighbors tent last night?" i look back with a face of shock and confusion and say noooo! no way!..but apparently my friend had overheard my stream splashing on the neighbors tent, and also voices from the other tent "..ummmm... is someone peeing on our tent?"

i honestly dont remember any of this. but i do have a history of sleep-peeing. lol once i peed on my friends tv and playstation 2.. i guess the xannies stacked on top of the dopamine depletion make increase my tendencies..ugh.

needless to say, we didnt hang out with them very much. SORRY!!!(EMBARASSED EMOTICON DEPICTED HERE)

im pretty sure that was my tent that you pissed on!

MrPiddles
02-03-2009, 07:57 PM
im pretty sure that was my tent that you pissed on!

Isn't the internet great?

jasonV
02-03-2009, 09:53 PM
haha yah man... thats fucked. i shoulda got out and beat the fuck outta you... but i too was pretty fucked up from alotta partying... i just laughed it off in the morning

indietron
02-03-2009, 10:00 PM
i guess these are suppose to be funny drug stories so: me and my sis went to the hollywood bowl to see pink floyd ... we tripped and saw one of the top ten shows i have ever seen .... we get back to her car and she locked the keys in the car ... we lived in La Habra and if you know LA, the bowl is about 25 miles away i think ... we just decided to hitch hike, how hard could that be eh ... we got a couple of short rides and only got about 5 miles .... finally about 330 a milk truck picked us up, one of those that used to deliver milk door to door .... well the driver was a head, so we spent the next 4 hours, tripping and smoking in this van like truck, stopping at what seemed every house in LA .... we just sat in the back, with the door part way open, drank what seemed like gallons of chocolate milk and watched the sun come up .... we didnt get home till like 730 in the morn .... cr****

Now that is a story. You never fail Ron

eskamo951
02-03-2009, 10:14 PM
Here's one.. In 07.. We were still frying at the end of the night and we were wandering around forever, trying to find our parking lot. (that's right.. trying to find the right PARKING LOT). Anyhow, My brother and his girlfriend went to track down a security guard to get directions.
Meanwhile, I turn to my friend Nick and say:
"God.. I just want to sit down right now!"

Immediately after I say this, I turn around and there is a fucking COUCH behind me! It was near the roads/walkways between the parking lots, just fucking sitting there.

I then realized my gift.
I have the ability to manifest furniture at my will.

EDIT:
So we had a seat, figured out where we needed to go, then headed on our merry way.

I want you on my team! Furniture manifestation can be very handy.

Hm...my funniest story...um...it's so hard to pick just one...
OK! I got it. So, last year, 2008, on Saturday, everyone in our camp group joked about how Prince would make it okay for ANY sex to go on that night. My friend and I were tripping hard through M.I.A. and Portishead, and by the time Prince appeared, we had made peace with the universe. We had settled in a spot near the shade tents and the closest group to us was a group of straight, frat looking guys. We could only sit there and feel amazing and kinda dance through Prince. In the middle of Purple Rain, I look over at the frat guys, and all of them are grinding on each other. Hardcore grinding. My friend and I looked at each other and all we could say was "PRINCE!" and giggle. I'm sure those guys took their friendship to a higher level after they left the polo fields.

thephatkat
02-03-2009, 10:30 PM
I want you on my team! Furniture manifestation can be very handy.

Hm...my funniest story...um...it's so hard to pick just one...
OK! I got it. So, last year, 2008, on Saturday, everyone in our camp group joked about how Prince would make it okay for ANY sex to go on that night. My friend and I were tripping hard through M.I.A. and Portishead, and by the time Prince appeared, we had made peace with the universe. We had settled in a spot near the shade tents and the closest group to us was a group of straight, frat looking guys. We could only sit there and feel amazing and kinda dance through Prince. In the middle of Purple Rain, I look over at the frat guys, and all of them are grinding on each other. Hardcore grinding. My friend and I looked at each other and all we could say was "PRINCE!" and giggle. I'm sure those guys took their friendship to a higher level after they left the polo fields.


ok...now i just threw up in my mouth a little....:winkiss

clumsy342
02-03-2009, 10:49 PM
Somehow we had come upon a large pile of blue and orange glowsticks (seriously like 20 just sitting in a pile)

Some raver took a dump.

hahaah.. good story.

CrimesceneCookie
02-04-2009, 12:25 AM
ok...now i just threw up in my mouth a little....:winkiss

what are you, mormon?

ZackQ
02-04-2009, 11:57 AM
Saw David Hasselhoff going into the porta johns by the Outdoor Stage. My friend, who is a little timid, had the digital camera. We camped out by the exit to the porta johns to snap a shot, you know so the whole world would know we saw the Hoff. My friend froze up and just stared at him.

I'm like, "what the hell was that?"

"I didn't want to bother him," my friend wussily replies.

I'll never let him live it down.

drewdrewdrew
02-04-2009, 12:15 PM
Saw David Hasselhoff going into the porta johns by the Outdoor Stage. My friend, who is a little timid, had the digital camera. We camped out by the exit to the porta johns to snap a shot, you know so the whole world would know we saw the Hoff. My friend froze up and just stared at him.

I'm like, "what the hell was that?"

"I didn't want to bother him," my friend wussily replies.

I'll never let him live it down.

hahahahhahahahahahaha
thats what the hoff does to a man.

fergie
02-05-2009, 03:53 AM
LOL at the main stage last yr I was lucky enough to be able to lean up against a barrier, not the mosh pit.

Anyway, the show ends & people are going off to the next show. Well, this girl & her friend are walking & the girl has to heave. I mean big time! I mean it was several heaves of vomit!! Projectile stuff ! Thank god she aimed at the ground. I wish I had my camcorder with me cuz this girl was thin & was heaving up gallons of vomit.

People stared & we all in unionson said, 'eewww'!

She finally was able to give everyone a smile & a thumbs up! She disappeared into the crowd with her friend.

Now, the real story...LOL

Everybody milling about, not realizing what had just been deposited freshly onto the ground were oblivious to why people were yelling, 'eeewww'!! At them.

Those poor people who were barefoot I had to say something, it wouldn't be right to see someone stick their covered or oncovered foot in someone elses junk.

It was just a special moment & shit! Remember to bring a camcorder next time! LOL

Safety tip: don't drink alcohol in the heat. Hydrate with water, if you don't drink water in the heat you will vomit up your organs!

True story.

BrickTop24
02-09-2009, 03:13 PM
last year after friday ended, my friend fell out of the porta poddy.

lol he was so lucky that no one was there but me.

jdaws
02-10-2009, 12:48 AM
haha yah man... thats fucked. i shoulda got out and beat the fuck outta you... but i too was pretty fucked up from alotta partying... i just laughed it off in the morning

well im glad it didnt get to that point, and that you just shrugged the incident off. very chella of you. but i am sorry bout the pee pee (even if it wasnt mine - im sure i wasnt the only perpetrator).

boarderwoozel3
02-10-2009, 03:02 AM
Yeah, drug induced shenanigans are best overlooked at Coachella. Sometimes they just happen, rarely is there malicious intent.

mcskye
02-10-2009, 02:41 PM
Before RHCP two years ago this very stout man that was quite wider than he was tall started freaking out and needed to go get a bottle of water. It was so cramped that he couldn't get anywhere and started trying to climb people screaming "Hoist me, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HOIST ME!" Being the kind person I am, we tried to hoist him, but he was a load and didn't make it more than ten feet before crushing a group of unsuspecting tweens, screaming.

"HOIST ME, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!" I will never forget is curly blonde white boy fro and board shorts.

lickety_spit
02-10-2009, 09:40 PM
i got my arm lodged between a pair of huge, sweaty tits once.

another time, some ho was whining through every band before the pixies.
i was going to tell her to go cut about it,
then i noticed that she already had many times before.

jasonV
02-10-2009, 10:58 PM
well im glad it didnt get to that point, and that you just shrugged the incident off. very chella of you. but i am sorry bout the pee pee (even if it wasnt mine - im sure i wasnt the only perpetrator).

haha yah it was pretty funny... but from what you described im almost positive it was you ha ah

zajaa
02-10-2009, 11:12 PM
i was on break from working the campground, throwing a frisbee with brother, and some hoighty toighty biotch in a golf cart drove by with some other chick and was all "see thats one thing i dont like about coachella, people throwing frisbees and footballs and stuff". wtfff its just frisbee

Xenocide
02-11-2009, 12:52 AM
that's the one thing i hate about Coachella... fat bitches riding around in golf carts...

AlexBlewHimB4U
02-11-2009, 06:03 PM
I want you on my team! Furniture manifestation can be very handy.

Hm...my funniest story...um...it's so hard to pick just one...
OK! I got it. So, last year, 2008, on Saturday, everyone in our camp group joked about how Prince would make it okay for ANY sex to go on that night. My friend and I were tripping hard through M.I.A. and Portishead, and by the time Prince appeared, we had made peace with the universe. We had settled in a spot near the shade tents and the closest group to us was a group of straight, frat looking guys. We could only sit there and feel amazing and kinda dance through Prince. In the middle of Purple Rain, I look over at the frat guys, and all of them are grinding on each other. Hardcore grinding. My friend and I looked at each other and all we could say was "PRINCE!" and giggle. I'm sure those guys took their friendship to a higher level after they left the polo fields.

That is the funniest thing I have heard all day! Last year during Justice, there was a sweaty group of frat guys rubbing up against each other but shouting like idiots to make it seem as if they didn't enjoy every second of it.

Also, I was considering not doing drugs at Chella this year but this thread made me realize that I won't have any stories if I don't haha. Thanks.