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randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 09:30 AM
Akabusi didn't like going to the dental hygenist as much as the next man but his smile was his bread and butters. So he lay back on the patent leather chair and felt his anus tighten like a pupil in flashlight.

The nurse came into the room and immediately Akabusi could smell pussy and it was strong. Within the confines of his dungerees he could feel the old chap twitch like a Michael J Fox without the pills. The nurse bent over Akabusi to check his molars and he caught a glimpse of her huge bristols.

He said "Ahhh". As the nurse left the room to get a lollipop and a sticker Akabusi wasted no time. He leapt up and slipped out of the dungerees, letting the air con in the room tingle his black and curlys. He thought briefly about having a w*nk before so he could last longer but it was too late.

The nurse walked into the room and spying the naked ebony Adonis before her became wetter than a paper towel in a Koh Sumai hotel on Boxing Day 2004. She let the white tunic slip to the ground and unleash an epic pair of tits and a pussy with less hair than Lex Luthor.

Akabusi mounted her like Dettori and rode her in the dentists chair until he came all over her like an airport fire hose. Because his mouth was so numb from the anesthetic he went down on her soaky wet clunge piece for about an hour before he came. And her as well. Obviously.

As he pulled on his dungerees he wiped his now fallen hero on the lollipop the nurse had given him, bent down over her spattered porcelain body and whispered "Awooga" in her ear before patting her on the fanny.

The End

bmack86
02-08-2007, 09:32 AM
is there a joke i'm not getting?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 09:33 AM
its british threadery at its best!

bmack86
02-08-2007, 09:35 AM
ahh.
Well, i'm not offended, but i guess just be warned that some people might get their panties in a bundle and report you.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 09:38 AM
report me for what?....there's plenty swearing and stuff on these message boards!

Mr.Nipples
02-08-2007, 09:46 AM
whoever takes the time to actually report somebody over something like this is an asshole...yeah but i dont get it...

hawkingvsreeve
02-08-2007, 10:14 AM
Please delete this thread.

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 10:18 AM
randy, remember when you tried to get it on with a dude on the old board?

TomAz
02-08-2007, 10:55 AM
I don't understand the purpose of this thread. This is not a forum for erotic writing. And even if it were why post this drivel?

RATMan
02-08-2007, 11:05 AM
Leave Randy alone, so what if he banged another dude on this board last year.. his post is British wit at its finest!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mq92Tv7Z-IE

John Peel is My Co-pilot
02-08-2007, 11:19 AM
Shouldn't this post start with "I am a student at a small Northeastern College and I never thought I'd ever have a story for your magazine"!

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 11:26 AM
http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b126/schoolofruckus/britishwit.jpg

RATMan
02-08-2007, 11:36 AM
Hahahhaa, Amelia Freebush, that's rich

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 12:06 PM
All these comments just go to show that British wit is the best in the world and wasted on you lot!!!!!

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 12:06 PM
randy, remember when you tried to get it on with a dude on the old board?

What you on about?

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 12:08 PM
All these comments just go to show that British wit is the best in the world and wasted on you lot!!!!!

Please show us which thread the wit was in so that we may enjoy it.

waxybk
02-08-2007, 12:08 PM
Please delete this thread.

That's what she said.

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 12:17 PM
All these comments just go to show that British wit is the best in the world and wasted on you lot!!!!!

Ha ha ha ha.....I've heard that this book has been taken out of circulation since this thread was began:

http://www.bloomsburystore.com/prodimages/large__09_12_2005_16_25_0091906318.02.LZZZZZZZ.jpg



Quote:
Originally Posted by schoolofruckus
randy, remember when you tried to get it on with a dude on the old board?

What you on about?

You kept hitting on dorkfish over and over again. Dorkfish is a fine piece of meat, no question, but he's a dude.

I'm just saying - do you remember that?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 01:07 PM
You reckon that was hitting on her!!?
I said the bird in the picture was alright but then checked the user name and realised it was some lad called brad. The other couple of posts were about some lad telling me to move along. (but you'll know if you've been following me!) and then i asked why he was bothered if dorkfish was a fucking bloke.
So hitting on eh, you Yanks don't half dramatise things..(eg. Pearl Harbour!!)

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 01:09 PM
So hitting on eh, you Yanks don't half dramatise things..(eg. Pearl Harbour!!)

I'm putting the "offle" in "roffle" right now.

Seriously, what on God's green earth are you blathering about?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 01:13 PM
You said I was hitting on her over and over. Bit of an exageration isn't it?
And i used the film 'Pearl Harbour' as an example of how American's dramatise things.....with me now?

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 02:08 PM
Surely you can see how I would be a little confused when you say Pearl Harbour in reference to a film whose title was "Pearl Harbor".

But yeah, otherwise, you were exactly right. The single stupidest and most clearly bullshit movie in the history of cinema is inassailable proof that Americans have a tendency for overdramatization.

Call me when an American cuts his balls off over a fucking football game.

TomAz
02-08-2007, 02:10 PM
aw come on, it was a big match!

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 02:21 PM
You reckon that was hitting on her!!?
I said the bird in the picture was alright but then checked the user name and realised it was some lad called brad. The other couple of posts were about some lad telling me to move along. (but you'll know if you've been following me!) and then i asked why he was bothered if dorkfish was a fucking bloke.
So hitting on eh, you Yanks don't half dramatise things..(eg. Pearl Harbour!!)


you have absolutely no talent for analogy and metaphor. I gave you the benefit of the doubt when you spewed your lame crap in the first post, believing it to be lame attempts at irony, but now I see that you clearly think yourself far more clever than you really are.

"wetter than a paper towel in a Koh Sumai hotel on Boxing Day 2004"? I figured you were trying to be funny likening a woman's bodily fluids to the worst natural disaster and loss of life in recent history, but you had just failed. Then "a pussy with less hair than Lex Luthor" and "he came all over her like an airport fire hose". What are you, 6 years old?

Now with the pearl harbor crack. British wit is reputed for being dry and subtle. You're neither. Grow up or get funny.

And this is not a gay personals board. Stop hitting on guys unless it's invited.

york707
02-08-2007, 02:37 PM
Brad was asking for it.

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 02:39 PM
You reckon that was hitting on her!!?
I said the bird in the picture was alright but then checked the user name and realised it was some lad called brad. The other couple of posts were about some lad telling me to move along. (but you'll know if you've been following me!) and then i asked why he was bothered if dorkfish was a fucking bloke.
So hitting on eh, you Yanks don't half dramatise things..(eg. Pearl Harbour!!)

I'll let your performance speak for itself. (http://p073.ezboard.com/fgoldenvoicefrm12.showMessage?topicID=531.topic)

Of course you aren't actually trying to get it on with "her"; that was my prized American ridicule skill. Apparently it was wasted on you lot!

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 02:41 PM
Just because Brad chooses to dress the way he does doesn't mean he's asking for it.

bmack86
02-08-2007, 02:41 PM
The old board colors were shocking to my eyes.

york707
02-08-2007, 02:43 PM
Just because Brad chooses to dress the way he does doesn't mean he's asking for it.

That's what she said.

All That I Am
02-08-2007, 02:51 PM
hAHAHAHA this is classic, I love you guys.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 02:52 PM
you have absolutely no talent for analogy and metaphor. I gave you the benefit of the doubt when you spewed your lame crap in the first post, believing it to be lame attempts at irony, but now I see that you clearly think yourself far more clever than you really are.

"wetter than a paper towel in a Koh Sumai hotel on Boxing Day 2004"? I figured you were trying to be funny likening a woman's bodily fluids to the worst natural disaster and loss of life in recent history, but you had just failed. Then "a pussy with less hair than Lex Luthor" and "he came all over her like an airport fire hose". What are you, 6 years old?

Now with the pearl harbor crack. British wit is reputed for being dry and subtle. You're neither. Grow up or get funny.

And this is not a gay personals board. Stop hitting on guys unless it's invited.

The alternative was that he came over her and left her looking like a painter's radio...but thanks. Miserable bastard

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 02:56 PM
Surely you can see how I would be a little confused when you say Pearl Harbour in reference to a film whose title was "Pearl Harbor".

.

Oh and it is Harbour...as it is Colour!....you forget we invented ENGLISH!!!

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 03:01 PM
Oh and it is Harbour...as it is Colour!....you forget we invented ENGLISH!!!

The English you speak is as different from the original (which itself was a bastardization other languages) as the American versions. And you only have your own laziness to blame for it.

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 03:01 PM
You did? Personally? Jesus Christ, you're a hero of mine!

"We" made "Pearl Harbor". "We" spelled it without a u when we named it.

You are a big enough idiot that I almost thought you meant we overdramatized the actual Pearl (have it your way) Harbour attack, which is why I asked you to clarify.

full on idle
02-08-2007, 03:03 PM
gabestraw90210

Yablonowitz
02-08-2007, 03:12 PM
Can we please not call Randy names? Let's not be like that. We won't get any more sex stories this way.

blakely
02-08-2007, 03:33 PM
Please, if you would, explain to me how we over dramatized the unprovoked attack and murder of thousands of american soldiers and civilians....

go ahead, Im listening......

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 03:37 PM
Please, if you would, explain to me how we over dramatized the unprovoked attack and murder of thousands of american soldiers and civilians....

go ahead, Im listening......


he was speaking of the film

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 03:37 PM
You did? Personally? Jesus Christ, you're a hero of mine!

"We" made "Pearl Harbor". "We" spelled it without a u when we named it.

You are a big enough idiot that I almost thought you meant we overdramatized the actual Pearl (have it your way) Harbour attack, which is why I asked you to clarify.

What the fuck you on about?
English began in England...end of, fuckin period maaan!
You lot wanna get out more instead of debating issues on t'internet. If u don't like the Fantastic story of lust at the beginning of this thread then don't respond and fuck off to talk shite and argue with some other kids who don't get out much!

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 03:38 PM
Please, if you would, explain to me how we over dramatized the unprovoked attack and murder of thousands of american soldiers and civilians....

go ahead, Im listening......

I wasn't unprovoked anyway, you just got outwitted big style!

blakely
02-08-2007, 03:40 PM
he was speaking of the film

im well aware of that....

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 03:41 PM
What the fuck you on about?
English began in England...end of, fuckin period maaan!
You lot wanna get out more instead of debating issues on t'internet. If u don't like the Fantastic story of lust at the beginning of this thread then don't respond and fuck off to talk shite and argue with some other kids who don't get out much!

I wasn't supposed to tell you this, but we intentionally roped you into this debate to keep you in, so you don't do any real damage in England.

I'm on about the fact that you - Randy Ricochet - have invented absolutely nothing apart from a laugh-inducing attempt at erotica. If there was a show called "American Romance Novelist" - or "Pop Romance Novelist", if you prefer - you would be William Hung. That is all.

blakely
02-08-2007, 03:42 PM
I wasn't unprovoked anyway, you just got outwitted big style!


what????????????

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 03:42 PM
I wasn't unprovoked anyway, you just got outwitted big style!

Unless you think your contributions to this thread are an attack on the US armed forces, you just got REALLY outwitted big style.

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 03:43 PM
What the fuck you on about?
English began in England...end of, fuckin period maaan!
You lot wanna get out more instead of debating issues on t'internet. If u don't like the Fantastic story of lust at the beginning of this thread then don't respond and fuck off to talk shite and argue with some other kids who don't get out much!

Typical English. Claim to have invented everything. Your language is a sub-branch of the Germanics which itself is a sub-branch of other languages.

Besides, today 2/3's of all native English speaking people on the planet are Americans. We speak it as we damn well please and you can just stop paying attention if you don't want to. Yet somehow I doubt you people will.

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 03:46 PM
im well aware of that....

to be fair, the film was a bunch of over-dramatized crap, but that's just obvious. Randy's just an idiot for using it as an indictment of American sensibilities as if we all loved the movie.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 03:47 PM
It wasn't even me who wrote it. You see, it has been forwarded in many an email over here (and there are a whole selection of stories following on from Kriss' exploits). I thought I would post it here for a reaction but it appears you have summed up your reputation as a nation without sense of humour.

bmack86
02-08-2007, 03:50 PM
Randy ricochet once posted. He was stupid, and incurred the wrath and ire of all. He remained pasty and unloved.
The end

woogie846
02-08-2007, 03:51 PM
I think randy is pretending to be British.

Good Days Last
02-08-2007, 03:53 PM
Haha, Ricochet. Go die. Movie or not, you could've used any other movie in the entire history of american film, and you decide to use "Pearl Harbor".

Sad we've always had to cover England's asses as well as the French.

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 03:54 PM
All the cool British people here are praying that's the case, I assure you.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 03:55 PM
Unless you think your contributions to this thread are an attack on the US armed forces, you just got REALLY outwitted big style.

Do u all take everything so fuckin seriously?
What you gonna do, use a bit of friendly fire!!!?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 03:56 PM
Haha, Ricochet. Go die. Movie or not, you could've used any other movie in the entire history of american film, and you decide to use "Pearl Harbor".

Sad we've always had to cover England's asses as well as the French.

Touched a nerve kid?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 03:56 PM
Oh and it's Harbour!!

Good Days Last
02-08-2007, 03:56 PM
Touched a nerve kid?


Nah, just trying to stir something up. These boards are slow, and boring.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 03:58 PM
Why are you yanks all so fuckin tense and serious?..Just a harmless comedy post turns into this!

Good Days Last
02-08-2007, 03:58 PM
Harbor.

Pearl. Harbor.
http://www.history.navy.mil/photos/events/wwii-pac/pearlhbr/pearlhbr.htm

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 03:58 PM
Randy, really. I'm still waiting for you to explain the "overdramatization" crack when your always-good-humoured nation has a dude who snipped his own sack off because a football club lost. Let me guess.....that was his oh-so-witty way of accepting gracious defeat?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 03:59 PM
He was welsh you prick....I am English, get your facts right

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:00 PM
Randy, really. I'm still waiting for you to explain the "overdramatization" crack when your always-good-humoured nation has a dude who snipped his own sack off because a football club lost. Let me guess.....that was his oh-so-witty way of accepting gracious defeat?

I suppose its a little more humourous than if any of your boys lose, they just take it out on their allies!!!

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 04:01 PM
Okay, your kingdom. Excuse the fuck out of me.


Do u all take everything so fuckin seriously?
What you gonna do, use a bit of friendly fire!!!?

Really, are you the only one who can ever be funny? You said something ridiculously off-base, I made a joke about it.....it's really not that complicated.

Good Days Last
02-08-2007, 04:02 PM
Hey Randy, what's the dif between welsh and english?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:03 PM
Do enlighten me as to what joke you made?....All I read were a lot of clever remarks but without the natural comedy. Are you all in the same philosophy class at school or something?

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 04:04 PM
It wasn't even me who wrote it. You see, it has been forwarded in many an email over here (and there are a whole selection of stories following on from Kriss' exploits). I thought I would post it here for a reaction but it appears you have summed up your reputation as a nation without sense of humour.

once again. show us something funny and we'll laugh. Your pitiful hack at humor wouldn't fly in the UK either. Your countrymen are probably cringing over being associated with your horrible pre-school humor.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:05 PM
Hey Randy, what's the dif between welsh and english?

Welsh are from Wales, English are from England!.....You can dismiss my last comments about cleverness!!!

Good Days Last
02-08-2007, 04:06 PM
Aren't they all english anyway? I mean, they're all on the same island right?

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 04:06 PM
Welsh are from Wales, English are from England!.....You can dismiss my last comments about cleverness!!!

You're not too quick either. He was implying that there is no difference, jackass. You're easy to toy with.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:07 PM
once again. show us something funny and we'll laugh. Your pitiful hack at humor wouldn't fly in the UK either. Your countrymen are probably cringing over being associated with your horrible pre-school humor.

Everyone loves it over here. You should come over and try some of our comedy clubs...although don't sit at the front with your miserable opinionated face as you will get picked on a hell of a lot!!!

I have to admit that it would helpa little more if you knew who Kriss Akabusi was!

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:08 PM
You're not too quick either. He was implying that there is no difference, jackass. You're easy to toy with.

How do u confuse a yank?

Good Days Last
02-08-2007, 04:09 PM
Brit. ish. jealous cuz we rebelled and spawned away from them.
Ha

Stamp Act my butt.

We put a Boston Tea Party up in hereeeeeeeeeeeeeee

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 04:10 PM
I have to admit that it would helpa little more if you knew who Kriss Akabusi was!

I'd almost guarantee that it wouldn't, but thanks for clowning yourself by making fun of us for not getting a stupid joke with an obscure context.

You're awesome.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:10 PM
Aren't they all english anyway? I mean, they're all on the same island right?

So whats Canada like this time of year?

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 04:11 PM
How do u confuse a yank?

Well, I know if someone whispered "Awooga" in my ear, I'd be pretty bewildered.

Yablonowitz
02-08-2007, 04:11 PM
Randy:

U complete me.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v682/yablonowitz/renee_zellweger5.jpg

Good Days Last
02-08-2007, 04:11 PM
My roommate is canadian.
I'm not.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:11 PM
I'd almost guarantee that it wouldn't, but thanks for clowning yourself by making fun of us for not getting a stupid joke with an obscure context.

You're awesome.

Your a tosser and I will personally seek you out give you a good old knuckle sandwich at the festival!

Mr.Nipples
02-08-2007, 04:13 PM
Shut the fuck up you clart...

Yablonowitz
02-08-2007, 04:14 PM
Your a tosser and I will personally seek you out give you a good old knuckle sandwich at the festival!

Uh oh. He's steppin' on you, jack. How you gonna play it?

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 04:15 PM
Your a tosser and I will personally seek you out give you a good old knuckle sandwich at the festival!

kisses, randy. I'll be the freakishly tall guy in a boonie hat and green shoes.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:15 PM
would that be ethnic speak...as in bumbaclot?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:17 PM
kisses, randy. I'll be the freakishly tall guy in a boonie hat and green shoes.

You mean a beenie hat?....why do you have to change the name of everything?

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 04:17 PM
would that be ethnic speak...as in bumbaclot?

no.

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 04:17 PM
You mean a beenie hat?....why do you have to change the name of everything?

no. not a beanie, you douche. Look shit up.

bmack86
02-08-2007, 04:18 PM
Shut the fuck up Randy.
You're out of your element.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:18 PM
Fair enough

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:18 PM
I'll take you all on, fuckin douche bags!

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 04:19 PM
Fair enough

I look forward to enjoying a spot of tea with you, Randy.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:20 PM
and a couple of light beers eh jack perhaps with a twinkie

keriann
02-08-2007, 04:24 PM
i'm laughing so hard it hurts

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 04:24 PM
I think Nick Hornby just shot himself so that he could roll over in his grave.

Meadowsmeister
02-08-2007, 04:30 PM
once again. show us something funny and we'll laugh. Your pitiful hack at humor wouldn't fly in the UK either. Your countrymen are probably cringing over being associated with your horrible pre-school humor.

nope. He's just a southerner, leave him alone.

Yank's obviously have got nothing better to do than get all angry about a freaking story, big bunch of babies.

You dont like it, dont read it.

Meadowsmeister
02-08-2007, 04:32 PM
I think Nick Hornby just shot himself so that he could roll over in his grave.

Nick Hornby is american...

blakely
02-08-2007, 04:32 PM
i simply enjoy toying with people..........

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:33 PM
I'm from Preston but cheers kid!
And do get the humour in the Kriss Akabusi story?

Meadowsmeister
02-08-2007, 04:34 PM
of course i bloody do, unlike people from *OTHER* Countries, i have a sense of humour

big bada boom....

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:34 PM
i simply enjoy toying with people..........

I enjoy toying your mum!!!!!

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 04:34 PM
Yank's obviously have got nothing better to do than get all angry about a freaking story, big bunch of babies.

And Brit is obviously have got nothing better to say than "you're an American and you don't get our humor".

You jack-booted fascists! Why does everyone else in the world get to be funny except for us?

Meadowsmeister
02-08-2007, 04:35 PM
hehe, that was pretty funny i have to say.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:35 PM
For the last time, it's HUMOUR (with a u)

schoolofruckus
02-08-2007, 04:36 PM
Nick Hornby is american...

Born in Surrrey, lives in Highbury. Turn in your Anglo card.

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:37 PM
Nick Hornby invented the Hornby model railway

Meadowsmeister
02-08-2007, 04:37 PM
touche! (no, not douche)

blakely
02-08-2007, 04:38 PM
I enjoy toying your mum!!!!!

really man????

that all you have to contribute???

a your mom joke???

and not even a good one???

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:39 PM
Eh?

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:40 PM
really man????

that all you have to contribute???

a your mom joke???

and not even a good one???

Who said it was a joke?....and i contributed the initial piece of genius and have suceeded in creating a thread with 100 posts!

blakely
02-08-2007, 04:46 PM
want a cookie???

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:47 PM
randy, remember when you tried to get it on with a dude on the old board?

So anyway divot, who was the bird he used to have on his profile then or is it just some random?.....and when i said she looked lik Cameron Diaz, he replied in a rather feminine way, you should sort him out!

randy ricochet
02-08-2007, 04:47 PM
No ta

Yablonowitz
02-08-2007, 05:26 PM
So anyway divot, who was the bird he used to have on his profile then or is it just some random?.....and when i said she looked lik Cameron Diaz, he replied in a rather feminine way, you should sort him out!

Yes, because he had no intention of disabusing you of your assumption regarding his gender. I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but that is called humor with an "o" to the no-u.

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 06:43 PM
nope. He's just a southerner, leave him alone.

Yank's obviously have got nothing better to do than get all angry about a freaking story, big bunch of babies.

You dont like it, dont read it.

Don't read it? This is what a message board is for in case the two of you pasty-faced fog breathers hadn't figured that out yet. I didn't taunt him initially, only after he decided to level childish and banal remarks about americans on an american board. It's not offensive, just irritatingly stupid. You're just too british to admit that if an american entered a british message board, posted an assinine and poorly written sex story, then was arrogant enough to accuse them of "not getting it", he'd be flamed as well.
There are brits who frequent this board who are funny, but then there are vapid little tits like you who think you're clever hurling out American generalizations that aren't the least bit offensive. For the good of your countrymen, and the species in general, please slice your balls off like your welsh friend.

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 06:45 PM
So anyway divot, who was the bird he used to have on his profile then or is it just some random?.....and when i said she looked lik Cameron Diaz, he replied in a rather feminine way, you should sort him out!

Your protests are adorable, you little homo.

bmack86
02-08-2007, 06:46 PM
I'm very happy. Know why? I discovered this little button that says I can ignore Randy Ricochet automatically.
Randy, welcome to the ignore list buddy.

bmack86
02-08-2007, 06:47 PM
Oh god is that ever satisfying

kaeso
02-08-2007, 06:56 PM
this thread is strange

keriann
02-08-2007, 07:18 PM
hahahahaha someone gave this thread one star

Jenniehoo
02-08-2007, 07:33 PM
This is the best thing that's happened on the new board.

jerpar24
02-08-2007, 08:50 PM
Oh and it is Harbour...as it is Colour!....you forget we invented ENGLISH!!!

Randy you did get yourself in some shit. Its spelled Harbor because us Americans like to fuck things up and try to make them simple. I know it should be Harbour but alot of Americans don't know that.

But unlike my American brothers I did get the joke. I found it some what funny.

bmack86
02-08-2007, 09:26 PM
We speak a different dialect of English, and thus spellings and pronounciations change.

jackstraw94086
02-08-2007, 09:48 PM
Randy you did get yourself in some shit. Its spelled Harbor because us Americans like to fuck things up and try to make them simple. I know it should be Harbour but alot of Americans don't know that.

But unlike my American brothers I did get the joke. I found it some what funny.

Holy shit. I'm choking on the reek of arrogance in this thread. You must not get out much if you think most americans on a message board such as this don't know about the british and their colours and harbours and their practise of using s's instead of "zed"s and their serviettes, aluminium, lorries, lifts, and loos and hhhhherbs. It's not a fucking mystery. Gabe didn't give the little pissant shit because he thought he mispelled the word. He gave him shit because he DID mispell it. If he was refering to the American film the title is "Pearl Harbor". "harbor" is not a "fucked up" spelling. We changed it and fuck off if you don't want to spell it that way. Our english has been modified over the last few centuries by the millions of people that have come here from all over the world. Shit changes. It's why you're not sitting here reading fucking sanskrit. Get over it.

blakely
02-08-2007, 09:54 PM
haha, sanskrit......

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 12:54 AM
Holy shit. I'm choking on the reek of arrogance in this thread. You must not get out much if you think most americans on a message board such as this don't know about the british and their colours and harbours and their practise of using s's instead of "zed"s and their serviettes, aluminium, lorries, lifts, and loos and hhhhherbs. It's not a fucking mystery. Gabe didn't give the little pissant shit because he thought he mispelled the word. He gave him shit because he DID mispell it. If he was refering to the American film the title is "Pearl Harbor". "harbor" is not a "fucked up" spelling. We changed it and fuck off if you don't want to spell it that way. Our english has been modified over the last few centuries by the millions of people that have come here from all over the world. Shit changes. It's why you're not sitting here reading fucking sanskrit. Get over it.

Your very fuckin hormonal Jack aren't you!!....Is it your special time of the month?
Like I said way back.....' Why the fuck do you lot take things so fucking seriously?' Frickin douche bags.
Oh and herbs only has one h!!

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 12:56 AM
Yes, because he had no intention of disabusing you of your assumption regarding his gender. I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but that is called humor with an "o" to the no-u.

The trouble with your humour, is that you are too contrived and try to be way to clever!.....just relax and have a laugh. Perhaps you would like some advice?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 12:58 AM
I'm very happy. Know why? I discovered this little button that says I can ignore Randy Ricochet automatically.
Randy, welcome to the ignore list buddy.

Shit man, you've really hurt my feelings. Oh well, who needs you when I have your mum!!!!

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 06:39 AM
The trouble with your humour, is that you are too contrived and try to be way to clever!.....just relax and have a laugh. Perhaps you would like some advice?

Are you sure you're familiar with the English language? The incident with dorkfish was the absolute opposite of contrived. The fact that you would get duped by a goofy avatar (a .gif animation no less!) of someone shrugging their shoulder and then telling them they look like Cameron Diaz was organically amusing. And dorkfish just played along with it. There wasn't any attempts at being clever...you were just an easy and daft target.

vinylmartyr
02-09-2007, 06:42 AM
way to many words in this thread.

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 06:47 AM
Shit man, you've really hurt my feelings. Oh well, who needs you when I have your mum!!!!

Again with the mom jokes. The wit.

All That I Am
02-09-2007, 07:02 AM
who needs you when I have your mum!!!!

Now that's british humor!
hahahahahhahaha

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 07:07 AM
Again with the mom jokes. The wit.

Fuck off you absolute twat!...your doing my head in now with your fucking moaning.....I would imagine you don't have a bird do you!

vinylmartyr
02-09-2007, 07:08 AM
Yablo is married Randy and hes an awesome person. I have met him and we are friends.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 07:10 AM
he is a fucking boring, moaning bastard

vinylmartyr
02-09-2007, 07:11 AM
tev

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 07:13 AM
Are you sure you're familiar with the English language? The incident with dorkfish was the absolute opposite of contrived. The fact that you would get duped by a goofy avatar (a .gif animation no less!) of someone shrugging their shoulder and then telling them they look like Cameron Diaz was organically amusing. And dorkfish just played along with it. There wasn't any attempts at being clever...you were just an easy and daft target.

Contrived - artificial ie your humour is not natural, you try to hard at being too clever, no slapstick!. Now if you don't stop moaning and trying to come up with another clever reply then I shall fuck your mum as well!!!

TomAz
02-09-2007, 07:16 AM
hey randy. I don't know if you've gotten to this in school yet but I suggest you go to wikipedia and look up Carl Jung. particularly the bit about projection. It might give you a bit of insightful self-knowledge. Just a friendly helpful suggestion.

blakely
02-09-2007, 07:17 AM
Dude!!!!~ I hate this guy!!!!!!!




Get off the message board.....
Youve been on for 24 hours for christ sake....
GET A LIFE.....

vinylmartyr
02-09-2007, 07:19 AM
randy ricochet sort of reminds me of mozzamarr from the old board

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 07:20 AM
The trouble with your humour, is that you are too contrived and try to be way to clever!.....just relax and have a laugh. Perhaps you would like some advice?
this is by far the funniest thing you've said in this thread. We're the ones trying to be clever and contrived? Who wrote the retarded attempt at a dumb story that we've enjoyed making fun of? Who quoted Pearl Harbor as evidence of America's penchant for over-dramitization? You did, you tiny little ignorant douche. How about learning something about americans from something other than your TV you humorless infant.


Your very fuckin hormonal Jack aren't you!!....Is it your special time of the month?
Like I said way back.....' Why the fuck do you lot take things so fucking seriously?' Frickin douche bags.
Oh and herbs only has one h!!
When you grow up you'll realize what this place is for. When you broadcast your idiocy you're going to have to accept that people will have fun ridiculing you for it. Your "special time of the month" crack only helps to more finely calibrate your age at about 17. And are is there really only one "h" in herbs? Are you sure there aren't 5 of them? You really are ignorant. Go brush your teeth and open your eyes, junior.

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 07:27 AM
Fuck off you absolute twat!...your doing my head in now with your fucking moaning.....I would imagine you don't have a bird do you!

OK, fine. I'll give you a slice of the yablomeat come 'chella time and YOU'LL be doing the moaning. We are going to rock it! I'm going to board the Randy train. CHOO CHOO!

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 07:30 AM
Eh up, the fucking miserable yanks are awake!!!
Have a nice day you fuckin twats!

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 07:32 AM
You know that's what he really wanted in the first place, yabs. Make him work for it.

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 07:35 AM
Eh up, the fucking miserable yanks are awake!!!
Have a nice day you fuckin twats!

I want your aids test before we 69 Randy, you hear me?!

Good Days Last
02-09-2007, 07:39 AM
Haha... I love this thread..

Continue being inane RR, please.

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 07:40 AM
Dude!!!!~ I hate this guy!!!!!!!




Get off the message board.....
Youve been on for 24 hours for christ sake....
GET A LIFE.....

I couldn't disagree more. randy ricochet and his complete lack of sense, comprehension, creativity, and yes, humor (British or otherwise) has led to possibly the funniest conversation on the new board. I say, keep it up, randy. Don't ever let us tell you what movie titles to spell correctly or which guys not to hit on or that mum jokes and expressions of nurse-fucking don't in any way display comic acuity.

jerpar24
02-09-2007, 07:41 AM
Eh up, the fucking miserable yanks are awake!!!
Have a nice day you fuckin twats!

Man Randy I got into this shit because I took your side in all this. You better not run away.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 07:44 AM
Man Randy I got into this shit because I took your side in all this. You better not run away.

Sorry kid, anyway i think I might start a new thread called ' Michael J Fox sex stories'!!

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 07:45 AM
*crosses fingers*

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 07:46 AM
One thread is enough to contain your adorable little tantrums

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 07:49 AM
it s difficult not to get frustrated with a bunckh of Americans with no sense of humour!...if you don't get it, just say..don't try and be clever and pick it apart.
Like I said early on, you all need to get out more!

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 07:51 AM
No no, it's not like we're actually aliens trying to radio the earth!

*wwwwrrrr* hello! *wwwwrrrr*

blakely
02-09-2007, 07:54 AM
it s difficult not to get frustrated with a bunckh of Americans with no sense of humour!...if you don't get it, just say..don't try and be clever and pick it apart.
Like I said early on, you all need to get out more!

We need to get out more?
Aren't you the one that has had his ass permanently stapled to his computer chair??? I dont think youve gone half an hour without posting something in the past day and a half......




This makes me happy.....
http://www.rit.edu/~les5934/scarface.gif

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 07:56 AM
Do the fuckin math!!!!.....your not really ver observant are you!....its at least8 hours!!!...

Stefinitely Maybe
02-09-2007, 07:59 AM
Randy, it's maths, not math! We're not American!

Also, everyone in this thread needs to chill out and watch some cheddarvision: http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_2193318.html?menu=

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 07:59 AM
Yablonowitz didn't like going to the dental hygenist as much as the next man but his smile was his bread and butters. So he lay back on the patent leather chair and felt his anus tighten like a pupil in flashlight.

The nurse, Randy Richochet, came into the room and immediately Yablo could smell asspussy and it was strong. Within the confines of his dungerees he could feel the old chap twitch like a Michael J Fox without the pills. Randy bent over yablo to check his molars and he caught a glimpse of his huge bristols.

He said "Ahhh". As Randy left the room to get a lollipop and a sticker Yablo wasted no time. He leapt up and slipped out of the dungerees, letting the air con in the room tingle his white and curlys. He thought briefly about having a w*nk before so he could last longer but it was too late.

Randy walked into the room and spying the naked ivory Adonis before him became looser than Elton John at a men's fashion show. He let the white tunic slip to the ground and unleash an epic pair of mantits and an asspussy with more hair than Grizzly Adams without a razor.

Yablo mounted him like Dettori and rode him in the dentists chair until he came all over him like an airport fire hose. Because his mouth was so numb from the anesthetic he went down on his soaky wet assfoam for about an hour before he came. And him as well. Obviously.

As he pulled on his dungerees he wiped his now fallen hero on the lollipop Randy had given him, bent down over his spattered porcelain body and whispered "t'internet" in his ear before patting his moist and chunky fanny.

The End

blakely
02-09-2007, 08:06 AM
Do the fuckin math!!!!.....your not really ver observant are you!....its at least8 hours!!!...

Bullshit.....

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 08:07 AM
Not bad, however the Elton John bit was not really very funny now was it...and Grizzly adams with a razor!!!!?...come on you'v ebeen so clever all this time and now you've gone shy!!!
Oh and I don't do black!

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 08:08 AM
Bullshit.....

what you do is look at the times i posted and then subtract earliest time form the latest time and you might get an answer...Wanker!

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 08:19 AM
Not bad, however the Elton John bit was not really very funny now was it...and Grizzly adams with a razor!!!!?...come on you'v ebeen so clever all this time and now you've gone shy!!!
Oh and I don't do black!

You lack reading comprehension - Grizzly Adams withOUT a razor, meaning an extra hairy Grizzly Adams. And you're not doing black you racist pig, I changed it to ivory.

Of course the Elton John bit was not funny...but it certainly wasn't less funny than the Michael J Fox part. Or...do you not see that?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 08:30 AM
Sorry, wasn't reading it proper I admit. And why over write everything?...instead of wasn't less you could have said more!....Again your trying to be too clever. Just relax and be natural!
And I do see the original version as funny thats whay I posted it (including the Michael J Fox bit)

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 08:31 AM
or even a simple ' was funnier' wouldhave sufficed!

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 08:34 AM
hey randy, do you remember when you tried to get it on with a dude on the old board?

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 08:35 AM
Sorry, wasn't reading it proper I admit. And why over write everything?...instead of wasn't less you could have said more!....Again your trying to be too clever. Just relax and be natural!
And I do see the original version as funny thats whay I posted it (including the Michael J Fox bit)

So, are we going to fuck or what?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 08:42 AM
If you can catch me

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 08:56 AM
hey randy, do you remember when you tried to get it on with a dude on the old board?

Knob Jockey

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 09:01 AM
Sorry, wasn't reading it proper I admit. And why over write everything?...instead of wasn't less you could have said more!....Again your trying to be too clever. Just relax and be natural!

The irony of your posts is the only humorous thing about you.

kreutz2112
02-09-2007, 09:05 AM
Knob Jockey

http://members.cox.net/virtualfairy/jockey.jpg

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:05 AM
tosser

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:08 AM
You clearly have too much time on your hands kuntz!!

jerpar24
02-09-2007, 09:08 AM
We need to get out more?
Aren't you the one that has had his ass permanently stapled to his computer chair??? I dont think youve gone half an hour without posting something in the past day and a half......




This makes me happy.....
http://www.rit.edu/~les5934/scarface.gif

WOW no way would should Chunk getting shot should make you happy. The Goonies is the best kids movie ever.

jerpar24
02-09-2007, 09:09 AM
Man Randy these guys need to lighten up.

kreutz2112
02-09-2007, 09:09 AM
http://www.all-creatures.org/recipes/images/salad-tossed-bowl_small.jpg



http://biology.clc.uc.edu/graphics/bio105/tongue.jpg

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 09:10 AM
he's deflecting the bullets. That's gif is years old now.

kreutz2112
02-09-2007, 09:10 AM
http://images.google.com/url?q=http://image.listen.com/img/356x237/5/8/7/7/707785_356x237.jpg&usg=__UEt8vOKznpM9XlYZcqtPnkQNTvc=

"Ive got too much *clap* *clap* time on my hands"

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 09:11 AM
Man Randy these guys need to lighten up.

pssst, jerpar24, in case you hadn't ascertained this yet, the joke's on you too.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:13 AM
Man Randy these guys need to lighten up.

Its fair enough, If one english bloke can create a thread to entertain these clever little boys then thats fine!

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 09:14 AM
soaky wet assfoam
santorum

blakely
02-09-2007, 09:17 AM
YEAH, I HATE THE WORD "BLOKE"...
IT SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONES TRYING TO SAY MY NAME BUT THEYRE ChOKING ON SOMETHING....

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:18 AM
Nice one dick head

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 09:18 AM
Its fair enough, If one english bloke can create a thread to entertain these clever little boys then thats fine!
don't kid yourself. It's not the subject your thread that we're toying with. It's you.

I'm guessing you're a bit onery because you learned in school yesterday that the human penis stops growing at 18, and you're deathly afraid that the next 2 years isn't enough time for your cock to grow as large as the ones in your fathers magazines. You'll learn to cope with being stupid and inadequate soon enough.

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 09:22 AM
Randy,

Changing the subject for a moment: Who do you think would win in a fight to the death (no weapons, neutral terrain) between a silverback gorilla and a grizzly bear?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:23 AM
Can you find any other interseting anecdotes on t'internet to post to me!?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:23 AM
depends if a gorilla will travel that far for the fight

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:24 AM
agin didn't read properly....
gorilla

blakely
02-09-2007, 09:26 AM
Nice one dick head

Fhew....
Watch out for this guy.....
Thats some razor sharp wit you have there........

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:28 AM
am i bothered?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:29 AM
Oh and it's spelt Phew!!!

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:29 AM
illiterate twat

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 09:31 AM
Kind of like how it's spelt "Pearl Harbor"? Even in England?

http://ec1.images-amazon.com/images/P/B00005QB7O.02._AA240_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 09:32 AM
Can you find any other interseting anecdotes on t'internet to post to me!?

An anecdote is a short story.

This is a hypothetical situation.

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 09:33 AM
Oh and it's spelt Phew!!!

Is that how spelled is spelt?

TomAz
02-09-2007, 09:34 AM
that 'Phew' remark was a pretty good one. gotta give him that.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:34 AM
Didn't pay that much attention when watching it....apart from Kate Beckinsale but the rest of the film is typical american shite

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 09:35 AM
Whoa...learn something new every day:

Main Entry:
2spelt Listen to the pronunciation of 2spelt
Pronunciation:
\ˈspelt\

chiefly British past and past part of spell

Fine...spell spelt like that. See if I care. You limey twat.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:35 AM
Is that how spelled is spelt?

yes

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:37 AM
Whoa...learn something new every day:

Main Entry:
2spelt Listen to the pronunciation of 2spelt
Pronunciation:
\ˈspelt\

chiefly British past and past part of spell

Fine...spell spelt like that. See if I care. You limey twat.

What you on about you fucking twinkie munching arse bandit?

blakely
02-09-2007, 09:39 AM
Oh and it's spelt Phew!!!

Really?? Did you actually try to correct me on the spelling of an imaginary word???? God you are seriously getting dumber and dumber as the posts go on... Are you De-evolving right in front of your computer?? Do you have a sudden urge to eat some bananas or climb a tree?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:40 AM
An anecdote is a short story.

This is a hypothetical situation.

And?....it is something you read previously and thought you would post. A situation is also a story...as it has a beginning and an end.

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 09:41 AM
Didn't pay that much attention when watching it....apart from Kate Beckinsale but the rest of the film is typical american shite

Yeah, it's certainly no "Love Actually", I'll give you that.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:42 AM
Really?? Did you actually try to correct me on the spelling of an imaginary word???? God you are seriously getting dumber and dumber as the posts go on... Are you De-evolving right in front of your computer?? Do you have a sudden urge to eat some bananas or climb a tree?

How can it be imaginary if it was spoken?...thought you were clever?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:43 AM
Yeah, it's certainly no "Love Actually", I'll give you that.

Havn't seen it

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 09:52 AM
See...why do you guys say "arse" instead of ass? It has far less pop.

You also say: tele, footie, bonnet, etc. You wussify words. What's up with that?

Twinkie muncher? Don't flatter yourself. I'm thinking you're more like a baby snickers.

blakely
02-09-2007, 09:54 AM
How can it be imaginary if it was spoken?...thought you were clever?

Its imaginary because there is no exact spelling for a sound, like boing or splunk, its NOT an actual word....... you hapless moron

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:54 AM
So shoot, twinkie, bud, dude, muffler and LITE BEER are manliest words you have are they!?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:55 AM
Its imaginary because it is no exact spelling for a sound, boing or splunk, NOT an actual word....... you hapless moron

It is in the dictionary, cock flick!

Definition
Phew! Show phonetics
exclamation (ALSO Whew!) INFORMAL MAINLY HUMOROUS
used when you are happy that something difficult or dangerous has finished or is not going to happen, or when you are tired or hot:
Phew! I'm so glad I don't have to give that speech.
Phew, it's boiling in here!

Now fuck off to the ball park!

adamnikyo
02-09-2007, 09:57 AM
Havn't seen it

but you were sure to watch some american shite like Pearl Harbor?
are you too fucking dumb to remember what you like?

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 09:57 AM
So shoot, twinkie, bud, dude, muffler and LITE BEER are manliest words you have are they!?

You leave muffler out of this; he didn't do anything to you!

blakely
02-09-2007, 09:58 AM
i looked it up and apparently phew is in the dictionary.....
congratulations..... you might actually live to see the age of 18 without wandering in front of a moving bus........

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 09:59 AM
but you were sure to watch some american shite like Pearl Harbor?
are you too fucking dumb to remember what you like?

Oh hello, another fucking yank in on the action......bring it on, see how many of you can try and wind me up!!
If you read sunshine, it was because of Kate Beckinsale

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 10:00 AM
i looked it up and apparently phew is in the dictionary.....
congratulations..... you might actually live to see the age of 18 without wandering in front of a moving bus........

Why thankyou

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 10:00 AM
what the fuck does muffler have to do with anything?

Did he just make up some american slang or is he refering to the car exhaust component?

jerpar24
02-09-2007, 10:01 AM
YEAH, I HATE THE WORD "BLOKE"...
IT SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONES TRYING TO SAY MY NAME BUT THEYRE ChOKING ON SOMETHING....

Yes because BLAKELY is a cool name.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 10:02 AM
what the fuck does muffler have to do with anything?

Did he just make up some american slang or is he refering to the car exhaust component?

read the above posts before making a ridiculous comment!

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 10:02 AM
bring it on, see how many of you can try and wind me up!!



The funniest part is that you don't know you're already wound up. You're not one iota as clever as you believe yourself to be.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 10:02 AM
Yes because BLAKELY is a cool name.

It is a bit Homo isn't it!

adamnikyo
02-09-2007, 10:02 AM
it was because of Kate Beckinsale


haha. that's sad.

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:04 AM
Over in America, we have a phrase to describe Kate Beckinsale: BOX OFFICE POISON.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 10:05 AM
The funniest part is that you don't know you're already wound up. You're not one iota as clever as you believe yourself to be.

I don't believe myself to be clever. Like I keep saying, all i did was post a comic thread and this is what I get. A load of miserable twats who have more opinions than pubes!
Doesn't bother me one bit kid!...I could carry on for ages however I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave now as the pub beckons!!
Do try to entertain yourselves while I'm away!!!

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 10:05 AM
haha. that's sad.

And it was on tv...didn't purposely go out and see it.

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 10:06 AM
read the above posts before making a ridiculous comment!

I did, retard. You spouted "muffler" in this post:

So shoot, twinkie, bud, dude, muffler and LITE BEER are manliest words you have are they!?

What the fuck are you talking about?
If you simply tell me to "read the above posts" again you'll prove yourself to be the braindead little cunt we all suppose you are.

jerpar24
02-09-2007, 10:06 AM
Oh hello, another fucking yank in on the action......bring it on, see how many of you can try and wind me up!!
If you read sunshine, it was because of Kate Beckinsale

Kate Backinsale is the only reason I watched it and I'm a american. It was a piece of shit film.

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 10:08 AM
Over in America, we have a phrase to describe Kate Beckinsale: BOX OFFICE POISON.

We have a phrase in England to . 'Fuck off you miserable yank cunts!....I'm off out!

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:08 AM
I don't believe myself to be clever. Like I keep saying, all i did was post a comic thread and this is what I get. A load of miserable twats who have more opinions than pubes!

Other way around. We have many pubes, as we are all full grown adults; we have but one opinion, which is that you, your jokes, and your half-baked nationalism, are aggressively stupid to the point of being fucking hysterical.

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 10:08 AM
I don't believe myself to be clever. Like I keep saying, all i did was post a comic thread and this is what I get. A load of miserable twats who have more opinions than pubes!
Doesn't bother me one bit kid!...I could carry on for ages however I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave now as the pub beckons!!
Do try to entertain yourselves while I'm away!!!

You are a pathetic liar. You're heaving as we speak. You absolutely are trying to be clever, you just can't seem to get it right.

You really should take Tom's advice and look up Carl Jung's idea of projection. It sums up your behavior here.

blakely
02-09-2007, 10:11 AM
It is a bit Homo isn't it!

Youve stuped to ridiculing my name??? Thats just childish.....

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 10:12 AM
I did, retard. You spouted "muffler" in this post:


What the fuck are you talking about?
If you simply tell me to "read the above posts" again you'll prove yourself to be the braindead little cunt we all suppose you are.

See...why do you guys say "arse" instead of ass? It has far less pop.

You also say: tele, footie, bonnet, etc. You wussify words. What's up with that?

That is where the muffler reply came from . Now you and all your mates who want to try it on, All go and spunk in each other's hair!

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 10:15 AM
See...why do you guys say "arse" instead of ass? It has far less pop.

You also say: tele, footie, bonnet, etc. You wussify words. What's up with that?

That is where the muffler reply came from . Now you and all your mates who want to try it on, All go and spunk in each other's hair!


that makes no fucking sense at all, doucheflush.

I'm trying to decide if you're just clueless about america or just trying to make another stupid, unfunny joke. I think both.

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:15 AM
Right. And what's so wrong with the word muffler? Root word is muffle, as in "Even Randy's mother had to muffle her own laughter when he read his stupid writings aloud at the talent show." A "muffler" muffles. It's not that difficult, and there's not really anything wussy about it.

Disco!
02-09-2007, 10:17 AM
See...why do you guys say "arse" instead of ass? It has far less pop.

You also say: tele, footie, bonnet, etc. You wussify words. What's up with that?

That is where the muffler reply came from . Now you and all your mates who want to try it on, All go and spunk in each other's hair!

Wait. What? You don't say tele/telly? Or footie
wtf?

randy ricochet
02-09-2007, 10:19 AM
Right. And what's so wrong with the word muffler? Root word is muffle, as in "Even Randy's mother had to muffle her own laughter when he read his stupid writings aloud at the talent show." A "muffler" muffles. It's not that difficult, and there's not really anything wussy about it.

It the same way as whats wrong with tele!...you cunt!
it is short for television so has a purpose.
Laters gaylords and look forward to speaking with you all monday!

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:20 AM
Randy's been here for pretty much 25 hours straight right now. That's pretty astounding. We've all been fucking with him in shifts.

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:21 AM
No, it's not the same. "Tele" is a wussy, cutesy shortening of "television". If someone called a "muffler" a "muff" - which, you probably would - then that would be wussifying it.

bballarl
02-09-2007, 10:22 AM
I just read the first and last pages of this thread. They are remarkable.

blakely
02-09-2007, 10:23 AM
Wait. What? You don't say tele/telly? Or footie
wtf?
Exactly......

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:23 AM
Andrew, you have to read all of it. The meat is where it really gets good.

blakely
02-09-2007, 10:25 AM
It the same way as whats wrong with tele!...you cunt!
it is short for television so has a purpose.
Laters gaylords and look forward to speaking with you all monday!


Right......

You'll be back here in an hour....... Just long enough to pleasure yourself and watch some "tele"......

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 10:25 AM
It the same way as whats wrong with tele!...you cunt!
it is short for television so has a purpose.
Laters gaylords and look forward to speaking with you all monday!

OK, I'll finally bite. Do you really believe americans say "tele" when refering to TV?

Disco!
02-09-2007, 10:26 AM
Andrew, you have to read all of it. The meat is where it really gets good.

Are you talking to me? Or another Andrew?

I think I might have an anuerysm if I read every page, this alone is making me cry, and they aint tears of joy.

Disco!
02-09-2007, 10:27 AM
OK, I'll finally bite. Do you really believe americans say "tele" when refering to TV?

Motherfuck I thought everyone here in the UK said tele when referring to the TV.

bballarl
02-09-2007, 10:27 AM
Hi Andrew. I'm Andrew. Pleased to meet you.

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:27 AM
bballarl's name is Andrew, and I actually know him, so I was talking to him. But welcome, different Andrew!

This thread has made me laugh until I cried....I don't think I've ever had this much fun on the message board in my life.

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 10:30 AM
Motherfuck I thought everyone here in the UK said tele when referring to the TV.

They do, but he's accusing americans of it. I'm trying to get him to decrypt his hack at a joke.

Disco!
02-09-2007, 10:36 AM
They do, but he's accusing americans of it. I'm trying to get him to decrypt his hack at a joke.

We're 8 pages deep, the only thing we can do is give him a bigger shovel.
Isn't there a mod who could lock the thread, ban the instigator and hold up this thread as a shining example of blinkers on head forward.

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:39 AM
Fuck that. I'd keep this going forever if possible.

bballarl
02-09-2007, 10:41 AM
I just read the whole thread. This needs to be preserved for future generations. Do we have any archivists?

adamnikyo
02-09-2007, 10:44 AM
Kate Backinsale is the only reason I watched it and I'm a american.


why would you watch a movie just to see a chick walk around and talk?
so lame.

blakely
02-09-2007, 10:45 AM
whats so wrong with kate beckinsale movies???

schoolofruckus
02-09-2007, 10:53 AM
They're almost always awful.

blakely
02-09-2007, 10:55 AM
you didnt like underworld????

jackstraw94086
02-09-2007, 11:02 AM
We're 8 pages deep, the only thing we can do is give him a bigger shovel.
Isn't there a mod who could lock the thread, ban the instigator and hold up this thread as a shining example of blinkers on head forward.

Why the hell would we want to stop him? This is hilarious. Somewhere along the line he accidentally discovered comedy even though he doesn't know how he's doing it.

John Peel is My Co-pilot
02-09-2007, 11:32 AM
why would you watch a movie just to see a chick walk around and talk?
so lame.


You obviously haven't seen the director's cut where she walks around naked straddling a thermos flask. It's the UK version!

Yablonowitz
02-09-2007, 11:56 AM
No, it's not the same. "Tele" is a wussy, cutesy shortening of "television". If someone called a "muffler" a "muff" - which, you probably would - then that would be wussifying it.

They would call it "muffie."

Oy! Me ears 're bleedin'. Get yer muffie fixed, lad!

corbo
02-09-2007, 12:17 PM
Underworld was a god awful movie....