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View Full Version : What is your favorite part of sex?



Yablonowitz
02-14-2008, 05:17 PM
Whatcha like?

Mr.Nipples
02-14-2008, 05:25 PM
a2m/gape

sbessiso
02-14-2008, 05:28 PM
piss/scat

JustSteve
02-14-2008, 05:41 PM
running off before paying...

gaypalmsprings
02-14-2008, 06:22 PM
smegma

invisiblerobots
02-14-2008, 06:30 PM
dog in a bathtub

miscorrections
02-14-2008, 07:56 PM
My S&M dungeon.

mvanwinkle
02-14-2008, 08:11 PM
dog in a bathtub

hahah. i had to think for a second what that was.

roberto73
02-14-2008, 08:18 PM
The uncontrollable weeping. Mine, not hers.

Boourns
02-14-2008, 08:26 PM
the donkey punch

jimmycrackcorn
02-14-2008, 09:00 PM
the buttflower

ayates
02-14-2008, 09:01 PM
Taking my partner(s) to Chuck E. Cheese afterwards.

miscorrections
02-14-2008, 09:22 PM
Little pink sock.

full on idle
02-14-2008, 10:07 PM
jesus christ yabs

BROKENDOLL
02-14-2008, 11:13 PM
When, without missing a beat, "Harder, Faster, Stronger" becomes "One More Time!" :dumbo

gratytrainridesagain
02-14-2008, 11:15 PM
Rusty Trombone

anti-square
02-14-2008, 11:18 PM
strawberry shortcake

Cpt. Funkaho
02-15-2008, 12:49 AM
Flying Camel...

Sometimes with the Richard Nixon variant.

Mr.Nipples
02-15-2008, 12:51 AM
When, without missing a beat, "Harder, Faster, Stronger" becomes "One More Time!" :dumbo

ppfffffffttttttttt...

Bluesky
02-15-2008, 05:28 AM
"what the FUCK was that"?

fatbastard
02-15-2008, 05:29 AM
a2m/gape

Your vote was funnier than the thread itself.

gaypalmsprings
02-15-2008, 05:32 AM
"Are you finished yet?"

invisiblerobots
02-15-2008, 05:42 AM
space docking

BROKENDOLL
02-15-2008, 06:53 AM
ppfffffffttttttttt...


"what the FUCK was that"? A "Queef," which occassionally occurs during Harder, Faster, Better Sex?

M Sparks
02-15-2008, 06:55 AM
Angry Pirate

roberto73
02-15-2008, 06:57 AM
Fast sandwich

Young blood
02-15-2008, 07:00 AM
when you and I cuddle.

<3 yablo 4 evah.

SFChrissy
02-15-2008, 07:35 AM
The part when you start to get all sweaty and hair is flying everywhere sticking to both bodies and you both are so HOT that you have to stop to open the windows and smoke a cigarette for a quick cooldown

PS...when I initially read option 2 I thought it said nipple fucking and had to ask myself wtf is that??? Then I reread it correctly...

thelastgreatman
02-15-2008, 11:09 AM
The olllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll' facefuck.

vinylmartyr
02-15-2008, 11:12 AM
t girl on girl.

Yablonowitz
02-15-2008, 01:28 PM
Grandma likes oral.

nationocean
02-15-2008, 01:36 PM
the jonbenet!

OhYeah! Meet me in the basement in five minutes hot stuff!

jonnypark
02-15-2008, 03:35 PM
Dirty Sanchez!

kreutz2112
02-15-2008, 03:39 PM
the superman. I was just told what this was a couple of days ago and it's fucking hilarious. It's where you cum on a girls back and she falls asleep on her back and when she wakes up the sheets are stuck to her back.

M Sparks
02-15-2008, 04:06 PM
These posts are much funnier if you don't explain them.

kreutz2112
02-15-2008, 04:07 PM
Did you know what a superman was?

Mr.Nipples
02-15-2008, 04:11 PM
It's where you cum on a girls back and she falls asleep on her back and when she wakes up the sheets are stuck to her back.

on her back?

kreutz2112
02-15-2008, 04:12 PM
doggy style.

M Sparks
02-15-2008, 04:17 PM
Check out 4:30-5:10 or so.
fjIuPSuYSOY

M Sparks
02-15-2008, 04:23 PM
Did you know what a superman was?

No. But these posts have a cumulative effect. None of them are funny on their own ('cept maybe Randy gets points for style) but I keep scrolling and scrolling, and I know what half of them are, so I assume the other half are equally horrible, and I keep scrolling, and laughing, and scrolling, and then
http://www.totalcarcrashes.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/02/car_crash_0164.jpg

kreutz2112
02-15-2008, 04:26 PM
Check out 4:30-5:10 or so.
fjIuPSuYSOY

That was pretty funny and ridiculous.

kreutz2112
02-15-2008, 04:45 PM
No. But these posts have a cumulative effect. None of them are funny on their own ('cept maybe Randy gets points for style) but I keep scrolling and scrolling, and I know what half of them are, so I assume the other half are equally horrible, and I keep scrolling, and laughing, and scrolling, and then
http://www.totalcarcrashes.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/02/car_crash_0164.jpg

Well the way I heard about what a superman is, was from hearing that soulja boy song (don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about...I know you are the person that pretends not to know anything about mainstream music). Apparently that's what they are talking about when they say superman.

thelastgreatman
02-15-2008, 04:47 PM
Submarining is a good one too.


But the fact is: EVERYONE likes the olllllllllllllllllllllllllll' facefuck.

BROKENDOLL
02-15-2008, 07:38 PM
the superman. I was just told what this was a couple of days ago and it's fucking hilarious. It's where you cum on a girls back and she falls asleep on her back and when she wakes up the sheets are stuck to her back.
BTW kreutz2112...How 'bout a Superwoman? That's where she takes charge from above and by the time your orgasm is through, you get up off the bed with all the sheets bunched up your buttcrack from trying to prolong it!

Boourns
02-16-2008, 08:48 PM
kentucky hot pocket

BROKENDOLL
02-17-2008, 01:22 PM
Okay, I'll take the bait...A Kentucky Hot Pocket is?

thelastgreatman
02-17-2008, 03:02 PM
Brokendoll, when the fuck is the last time your signature HASN'T been something I said about you?

Stop crushing on me.

rage patton
02-17-2008, 03:20 PM
Nipple Licking - algunz, Mr.Nipples, Roger Waters - 3 - 10.00%

LOL.

gmoneyak
02-17-2008, 03:23 PM
I'm a big fan of the Gallagher, personally..

Natelevmofuggaz
02-17-2008, 08:28 PM
I like it when they shit in a cup and eat it.

Veloco22
02-17-2008, 10:06 PM
the abraham lincoln

Boourns
02-17-2008, 10:24 PM
Okay, I'll take the bait...A Kentucky Hot Pocket is?

defecating into a vag

algunz
02-17-2008, 11:31 PM
I learned that I have a very addictive personality. People are addicted to me and I’m addicted to many things. One of them was masturbation. I was a late bloomer with everything. And like everything, once I discovered the joys of masturbation I couldn’t stop.

The first time I experienced an orgasm was with Chris. He had his mouth in my crotch with my legs up over his shoulders as he knelt on the bed and I hung over the edge. All of the blood rushed to my head. I had been aroused before but I had never orgasmed. At the time, I hadn’t even realized exactly what an orgasm was. As Chris’ tongue stroked my clit I felt that wave for the first time. The backs of my knees began to sweat. My whole body became hot and heavy. My hands began to massage my breasts and my hips began to rock. All of these things seemed to happen outside of my awareness. I felt everything. Chris obviously aware of my state began to lick and suck. I moaned. His hands swept across my belly and squeezed my waist. And then it hit me. I felt the heat and the tickle move from my vagina up through my chest. Chris squeezed harder on my waist and held me as I twitched and groaned with excitement.

The next day I barely left my room. I woke up still spinning from the night before. All I could think about was learning how to do it myself. Chris left for class and I wasted no time. I got out of bed and walked around the room nude opening the windows. The city noises spilled in to my space. I stood by the window and stared out onto the street. I knew that if anyone looked up, they would see me naked in the window. That excited me. I touched my breast. I crept my hand down my stomach to my privates and slid my finger into its folds. I walked over to the floor length mirror and watched myself. My hand continued to massage my breast and I realized that if I focused more on just my nipple it made me hotter. I stroked my clit and fingered myself. My own wet created a lubricant and allowed my finger to massage better. I came quickly. I wanted the feeling again and so I started all over again.

I masturbated for hours. I took breaks every few times to give my hands a rest. My forearm was sore. My nipples and clit became tender, but I couldn’t stop. Each time I would do it I would discover something new that made it better. I realized that if you push more blood down there by doing Kegel exercises the orgasm was more intense. I discovered that if you extend your legs wider it makes it better. I discovered that if you put something inside you it makes it stronger. I learned that if you rub the top of the clit and not just the tip it made it get aroused quicker. It’s like a little penis. It gets harder and longer. I was fascinated by my body and the things that it could do.

I finally had to stop because I was starving and I was sore all over. I got dressed and headed out onto Broadway still blurry eyed from my long day. I stared at the people I passed and I felt transformed.

I had a dirty, little secret.

Mr.Nipples
02-17-2008, 11:37 PM
why the fuck did i read that...

algunz
02-17-2008, 11:42 PM
Cuz it was there, that's how it usually works.

Mr.Nipples
02-17-2008, 11:48 PM
go fuck yourself...

thelastgreatman
02-17-2008, 11:57 PM
Gunz wanted to post a little piece of pseudo-erotica she wrote once in college. She thinks it's actually good writing.

anti-square
02-18-2008, 12:11 AM
The filthy algunz.

thelastgreatman
02-18-2008, 12:14 AM
If she doesn't do atm, I'm not impressed.


On the other hand, she's a schoolteacher, so there's a good shot.

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 12:27 AM
Brokendoll, when the fuck is the last time your signature HASN'T been something I said about you?

Stop crushing on me. "Scuse me for finding the shit you say about me funny and amusing enough to use as my sig...As for "crushing" on you..I didn't say I wanted to fuck you...I said you were funny. Christ, get over your damn self already!

thelastgreatman
02-18-2008, 12:32 AM
Lady, every post you write to me has a three-inch clit poking out of you. I've had like ten people mention to me, "So Brokendoll is clearly in love with you," and I'm like, "I KNOW, IT'S CREEPY, SHUT UP ABOUT IT."

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 01:02 AM
Lady, every post you write to me has a three-inch clit poking out of you. I've had like ten people mention to me, "So Brokendoll is clearly in love with you," and I'm like, "I KNOW, IT'S CREEPY, SHUT UP ABOUT IT." My Dearest Randy, Your sense of humor has amazed and awed me over the past 10 months and you've made me laugh at things that were otherwise unfunny in life. Oh, how I've looked forward to your obnoxious insults and rude behavior! And I can't thank you enough for all the wonderful things you've said, leaving me with no choice but to quote you. Unfortunately, darling, I must confess something to you...Everytime you post, I can't help but picture some asshole with a 3" dick and suddenly realize you aren't the lastgreatman afterall...I'm sorry honey, but you can be replaced with two "C" batteries...

thelastgreatman
02-18-2008, 02:42 AM
I would think that as a woman dating Super Mario, you would know that Gameboys take AAs, not Cs.

malcolmjamalawesome
02-18-2008, 07:47 AM
some asshole with a 3" dick

Did someone call my name?

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 10:12 AM
I would think that as a woman dating Super Mario, you would know that Gameboys take AAs, not Cs.Maybe once you grow out of your preadolescent game stage of life, you'll learn a thing or two...Adult toys are more exciting and pleasurable than sitting around with some Gameboy who thinks his dick is a joystick, and if you insist on staying in the AA category of Super Mario, fine. My Super Mario doesn't need batteries and doesn't mind if I play with my toys that do!

malcolmjamalawesome
02-18-2008, 10:15 AM
Reading BROKENDOLL's posts makes me want to die.

malcolmjamalawesome
02-18-2008, 10:19 AM
And for the record, my favorite part of sex is when thelastgreatman starts crying.

Suffacated
02-18-2008, 10:20 AM
I'm staying the hell oute this....

Suffacated
02-18-2008, 10:23 AM
And for the record, my favorite part of sex is when thelastgreatman starts crying.

Damnit...cant resist...

is it a good happy cry...
or a painfull kind of cry?

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 10:23 AM
Reading BROKENDOLL's posts makes me want to die. And having a 3" dick doesn't?

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 10:27 AM
And for the record, my favorite part of sex is when thelastgreatman starts crying.


Damnit...cant resist...

is it a good happy cry...
or a painfull kind of cry? Probably more of a cry of frustration since I'm assuming it's hard to play video games and jack off at the same time.

kreutz2112
02-18-2008, 10:30 AM
that doesn't even make sense.

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 10:31 AM
Yo, Mario! Christopher may think you're hot, but I still think you're F.I.N.E! BTW...What's up with the Prep-Jock avatar?

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 10:32 AM
that doesn't even make sense. Sorry...I didn't realize this thread was being sensored...My bad.

Suffacated
02-18-2008, 10:38 AM
Brokendoll, when the fuck is the last time your signature HASN'T been something I said about you?

Stop crushing on me.

See...
your crying has once again paid off ....

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 10:44 AM
LOL

malcolmjamalawesome
02-18-2008, 11:00 AM
And having a 3" dick doesn't?

No, that also does.

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 11:10 AM
No, that also does. Stop your dying wishes by ignoring my posts and go get yourself a Gameboy.:winkiss

malcolmjamalawesome
02-18-2008, 11:12 AM
Stop your dying wishes by ignoring my posts and go get yourself a Gameboy.:winkiss

It's like posting with Mad Libs.

thelastgreatman
02-18-2008, 11:47 AM
For the record, my favorite part of sex with Malcolm is when I start crying too. I use the tears as lube.

algunz
02-18-2008, 01:03 PM
Gunz wanted to post a little piece of pseudo-erotica she wrote once in college. She thinks it's actually good writing.

No, that one I fully recognize as bad. : )

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 01:05 PM
See...
your crying has once again paid off ....


For the record, my favorite part of sex with Malcolm is when I start crying too. I use the tears as lube. That's a crying shame...

traviscanada
02-18-2008, 02:06 PM
This thread has gotten off topic.

Eiffel Tower.

jonnypark
02-18-2008, 02:25 PM
That's a crying shame...

hahahaha

jonnypark
02-18-2008, 09:02 PM
this thread used to be about something real

thelastgreatman
02-18-2008, 10:32 PM
this thread used to be about something real

Fuckbutt?

jonnypark
02-18-2008, 10:40 PM
exactly

MonsoonSeason
02-18-2008, 10:43 PM
I just like kissing

after that it's all downhill

BROKENDOLL
02-18-2008, 11:10 PM
Kissing can be really sexy... but, just at the peak of orgasm, when you're willing to hand over your credit cards, PIN #'s, and key to your life savings is the best part!

boarderwoozel3
02-19-2008, 12:22 AM
portuguese breakfast

sbessiso
02-19-2008, 03:48 AM
the part where i clean up after myself

BROKENDOLL
02-19-2008, 08:28 AM
As in washing your hands or having to mop the whole floor and wipe down the walls?

Stainofmind
02-19-2008, 04:59 PM
Pearl Necklace

BROKENDOLL
02-19-2008, 05:42 PM
They say that pearl necklaces compliment just about anything you wear...I mean, c'mon, look at Monica Lewinski... and hers was halfway down the front of her dress and she still made headlines!

Stainofmind
02-19-2008, 08:41 PM
They say that pearl necklaces compliment just about anything you wear...I mean, c'mon, look at Monica Lewinski... and hers was halfway down the front of her dress and she still made headlines!

lol

boarderwoozel3
02-19-2008, 11:18 PM
Ummm, I'm thinking the necklace wasn't what got her in the news. Just say'n.

BROKENDOLL
02-19-2008, 11:45 PM
Okay, so she could do shorthand...from under a desk...

thelastgreatman
02-20-2008, 01:50 AM
"You said you gave Mary Jane a pearl necklace."

"Clearly, you guys missed the point of that story."

kreutz2112
02-20-2008, 01:24 PM
Cleaning the pipe.

rage patton
02-22-2008, 01:31 PM
I want the Roger Water alias to post more often.

jigsaw
02-22-2008, 03:55 PM
when I make them titties bounce!!!

shoegazer76
02-22-2008, 03:59 PM
I like to serve up Biscuits & Gravy

Recipe for Biscuits & Gravy:
Don't shower for days or go jog & build a sweaty mung in your crotch.
Your partner wears a gas mask & blows you through the hole in it so all the smell & flavor can be taken in.

BROKENDOLL
02-23-2008, 12:04 AM
The hind-lick manuever...I taint kidding! And, speaking of taints...

Cpt. Funkaho
02-23-2008, 12:53 AM
God damn it, I knew clicking on this thread was a mistake.

everlay
02-23-2008, 06:50 AM
PONY RIDES!

kroqken
10-23-2009, 09:13 PM
I do enjoy nipple licking, it is underrated so far for others, not for me!

gaypalmsprings
10-23-2009, 09:52 PM
Sloppy seconds.

Kropladop
10-27-2009, 05:40 PM
New Zealand Triplefist