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Suffacated
07-10-2011, 02:23 PM
No one touched this? Maybe the board is finally becoming a man.

You showed intent for bringing this one up....thats all that matters.

ramblinon
07-10-2011, 03:10 PM
I fear I've come to the age where getting caught having sex in an apartment complex pool is neither cool nor a badge of honor... it's a bit creepy.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-10-2011, 04:25 PM
FUCK YEAH, RAMBLINON

ramblinon
07-10-2011, 04:47 PM
FUCK YEAH, RAMBLINON

I eagerly await your fist-bump of approval, bro.


Just please don't use your cum-laden masturbatory hand. I'm sure it's gotten ample use through the years.

Drinkey McDrinkerstein
07-10-2011, 09:20 PM
I spend an absurd amount of time reading blogs and trip reports about amusement parks. I just spend the last half hour reading reviews of stunts shows at places I'll probably never visit.

Suffacated
07-10-2011, 09:38 PM
I've been sitting here in some parking lot off of the 91 freeway somewhere in Corona for about 1/2 hr just thinking about what I have just done. I hope I made the right choice. WTF! Those were gun shots and they were way too close to where I'm sitting. Time to go.

chiapet
07-10-2011, 09:52 PM
I have no game at all. Twice this week, strangers who weren't ugly insisted on buying me a drink. Each time I said "thanks" and walked away. :/

RedHotSgtPeppers
07-10-2011, 10:13 PM
I have no game at all. Twice this week, strangers who weren't ugly insisted on buying me a drink. Each time I said "thanks" and walked away. :/

Are you married?

Here is what you do. Have them buy you a drink, chug it like a boss, go "AAAAHHHH" (like you do when you you drink something delicious), say thank you, and walk away. Repeat for infinite drinks. Problem Lonlies?

ramblinon
07-10-2011, 10:17 PM
I have no game at all. Twice this week, strangers who weren't ugly insisted on buying me a drink. Each time I said "thanks" and walked away. :/

No offense, but that doesn't sound like it's about "having game" as much as being polite... or standard human interaction...

On a positive note, if guys trying to buy you drinks is your biggest problem, things could be plenty worse.

miscorrections
07-10-2011, 10:21 PM
I have no game at all. Twice this week, strangers who weren't ugly insisted on buying me a drink. Each time I said "thanks" and walked away. :/

My game has also deserted me. I was talking with my friend over some margaritas about how I felt bad about being such a bitch over some unimportant circumstance and a cute guy interrupted me to say, "You're too cute to be a bitch!" I looked at him like he had three heads and ran away shortly after.

miscorrections
07-10-2011, 10:22 PM
Why was it so easy in college? I feel like an idiot 99% of the time now.

chiapet
07-10-2011, 10:27 PM
I'm not married.


No offense, but that doesn't sound like it's about "having game" as much as being polite... or standard human interaction...

I don't think I'm particularly rude. The interaction usually goes something like this: guy asks what I'm ordering, I tell him, he orders for me, I try to give him money, he says he wants to buy the drink for me. I ask if he's sure and try to give him money. He insists. I make small talk while waiting for the drink. We get our drinks. AT THIS POINT, what else is there to do but say thanks and bye?

Let me clarify that this usually happens when I'm out with friends. When I'm out by myself I'd probably talk to the person longer.

But I'm not really clear on what's expected in this situation. Does accepting the drink obligate me to flirt? Offer my number? Just talk for a few minutes?


And yes, Corinna, it's miserably awkward after you leave college. At least in college you knew exactly what everyone was after.

Neighborhood Creep
07-10-2011, 10:37 PM
I sneezed on a clients food today, and still served it to him. It took over an hour to make and I wasn't about to start over.

RageAgainstTheAoki
07-10-2011, 10:43 PM
You uhhh... cook for "clients"? Backpage.com?

ramblinon
07-10-2011, 10:49 PM
I'm not married.



I don't think I'm particularly rude. The interaction usually goes something like this: guy asks what I'm ordering, I tell him, he orders for me, I try to give him money, he says he wants to buy the drink for me. I ask if he's sure and try to give him money. He insists. I make small talk while waiting for the drink. We get our drinks. AT THIS POINT, what else is there to do but say thanks and bye?

Let me clarify that this usually happens when I'm out with friends. When I'm out by myself I'd probably talk to the person longer.

But I'm not really clear on what's expected in this situation. Does accepting the drink obligate me to flirt? Offer my number? Just talk for a few minutes?


ok, that sounds much more normal...

I've always thought that at least a few minutes of conversation is proper in those situations. It's the least you can do for a guy spending upwards of $10 on you. If he seems less-than-desirable, you can always make up some lame excuse or claim to have a boyfriend...he wont know any better, probably wont get completely butthurt, and you've extricated yourself from the situation with a free drink...

fatbastard
07-10-2011, 11:40 PM
I'm not married.



I don't think I'm particularly rude. The interaction usually goes something like this: guy asks what I'm ordering, I tell him, he orders for me, I try to give him money, he says he wants to buy the drink for me. I ask if he's sure and try to give him money. He insists. I make small talk while waiting for the drink. We get our drinks. AT THIS POINT, what else is there to do but say thanks and bye?

Let me clarify that this usually happens when I'm out with friends. When I'm out by myself I'd probably talk to the person longer.

But I'm not really clear on what's expected in this situation. Does accepting the drink obligate me to flirt? Offer my number? Just talk for a few minutes?


And yes, Corinna, it's miserably awkward after you leave college. At least in college you knew exactly what everyone was after.

Yeah, I donít see this as rude and no, you are not obligated to speak with that person. Itís a sign that someone is interested. Saying thanks graciously and walking away is equivalent of saying that you appreciate the drink, but Iím just not feeling a connection.

Perhaps youíre not as aggressive to get your swirl on compared to when you were younger because youíve discovered that itís easy to find someone, but harder to find someone who doesnít land up being a dick.

My confession.
I drank 2 bottles of red wine last night. My last 3 shits over the past 8 hours have been dark purple. Iím not looking to be weird, just wanted to make sure everything goes down with the flush.

M Sparks
07-11-2011, 01:25 AM
At least in college you knew exactly what everyone was after.

It changes?

SoulDischarge
07-11-2011, 02:05 AM
I've never had any game at all. I have no confidence. Something I'm working on.

SoulDischarge
07-11-2011, 02:06 AM
It changes?

Some people want kids. Or your pancreas mounted on their mantle. Some people have mantles.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 09:07 AM
I wasn't complaining that guys buy me drinks when I'm not interested in them. Quite the opposite. I was confessing that I'm totally clueless when it comes to whatever expected flirting comes after that.

And fine, Marc, perhaps what people are after hasn't changed, but it's certainly more difficult. I don't know why that is. But it is.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 09:54 AM
I wasn't complaining that guys buy me drinks when I'm not interested in them. Quite the opposite. I was confessing that I'm totally clueless when it comes to whatever expected flirting comes after that.

And fine, Marc, perhaps what people are after hasn't changed, but it's certainly more difficult. I don't know why that is. But it is.

Try taking two shots of whiskey, drink a beer. Then wait for the offer to come.

"Hey can I buy you a drink chia?"

"No im already drunk, are you just offering so you can get to know me?"
Depending on his answer you take it from there.
IMO the problem with both of you ambiguous women is that you are submissive and you need someone aggressive.

guedita
07-11-2011, 09:54 AM
You're

hydr1
07-11-2011, 09:56 AM
You're

If I had a tail it would be between my legs.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 10:03 AM
^ what is wrong with you?

chiapet
07-11-2011, 10:08 AM
hyrd1's opinions of women are really perplexing.

I thought we were all lacking men because we're career-obsessed. That seems at odds with this new supposition that we're just too passive.

Actually, I'm not sure who you were referring to in the plural (other than me). If you were suggesting that miscorrections and I are not aggressive when it comes to pulling guys, my response is hahahahahhahaaha.

NachoCat
07-11-2011, 10:28 AM
I fear I've come to the age where getting caught having sex in an apartment complex pool is neither cool nor a badge of honor... it's a bit creepy.


HAHAHAHAHAAAA

M Sparks
07-11-2011, 11:52 AM
And fine, Marc, perhaps what people are after hasn't changed, but it's certainly more difficult. I don't know why that is. But it is.

Hmmm...I've found the exact opposite to be true. You'd think a divorce would have hurt my confidence...it did for like a month...and then I found it was really easy. I was a complete dating mess in college.


If you were suggesting that miscorrections and I are not aggressive when it comes to pulling guys, my response is hahahahahhahaaha.

:rotfl

hydr1
07-11-2011, 12:59 PM
Came to a forum and stated y'all don't know how to act when guys buy you drinks,

Then ridicule me for assuming that you don't know how to act when guys buy you drinks.

Not making much sense.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 01:01 PM
Heidi is suggesting that though we may not know what to do when surprised with male attention, we are absolutely not afraid to make the first move to get what we want.

JebusLives
07-11-2011, 01:04 PM
I wasn't complaining that guys buy me drinks when I'm not interested in them. Quite the opposite. I was confessing that I'm totally clueless when it comes to whatever expected flirting comes after that.


I'm also at a complete loss when it comes to striking up conversation with a total stranger. Has little to do with dating, really, but it's why I don't buy girls drinks. What on earth do you open with that won't sound rediculous, overly-aggressive or just painfully obvious? Its just a really socially awkward way to meet. There has to be at least some context, some shared experience to rap about.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 01:10 PM
I'm also at a complete loss when it comes to striking up conversation with a total stranger. Has little to do with dating, really, but it's why I don't buy girls drinks. What on earth do you open with that won't sound rediculous, overly-aggressive or just painfully obvious? Its just a really socially awkward way to meet. There has to be at least some context, some shared experience to rap about.

i always open with, "so were you ever molested?" do this enough times and you're bound to find a girl that was and with that comes her being damaged and therefore, easy.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 01:22 PM
Heidi is suggesting that though we may not know what to do when surprised with male attention, we are absolutely not afraid to make the first move to get what we want.

I don't buy it. This is the interwebs.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 01:22 PM
Heidi is suggesting that though we may not know what to do when surprised with male attention, we are absolutely not afraid to make the first move to get what we want.

Right.

And in the event that the stranger is dazzling or otherwise immediately catches my eye and has made an attempt at conversation, obviously I keep track of the guy, buy the next round, and generally attempt to proceed in the direction of tearing at clothes while in a taxi together.

It's more situations where, some random person appears, and having not even said hi or made eye contact with me yet, insists on buying a drink. I find that a little weird. (Though I understand that maybe the guy is trying to act in the short time frame before you order your own drink and walk away). I might try to decline once in a very polite way, but I think being persistent comes across as bitchy and rude.

Then that's where the problem comes in, someone that I wouldn't have noticed otherwise is now looking at me to do something. Maybe he's only expecting me to make conversation for a few minutes. But I don't really know. So usually if he doesn't say something interesting in the time it takes to be served the drinks, I move on.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 01:23 PM
I'm also at a complete loss when it comes to striking up conversation with a total stranger. Has little to do with dating, really, but it's why I don't buy girls drinks. What on earth do you open with that won't sound rediculous, overly-aggressive or just painfully obvious? Its just a really socially awkward way to meet. There has to be at least some context, some shared experience to rap about.

Cheezy one liners....duh

Gribbz
07-11-2011, 01:25 PM
I'm also at a complete loss when it comes to striking up conversation with a total stranger. Has little to do with dating, really, but it's why I don't buy girls drinks. What on earth do you open with that won't sound rediculous, overly-aggressive or just painfully obvious? Its just a really socially awkward way to meet. There has to be at least some context, some shared experience to rap about.

I feel you. I'll buy a girl a drink if we've already been chatting, but I certainly won't open with it.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 01:27 PM
I'm also at a complete loss when it comes to striking up conversation with a total stranger. Has little to do with dating, really, but it's why I don't buy girls drinks. What on earth do you open with that won't sound rediculous, overly-aggressive or just painfully obvious? Its just a really socially awkward way to meet. There has to be at least some context, some shared experience to rap about.

I don't think it's a particularly contrived way to catch someone's attention. If she's definitely, absolutely repulsed and not interested in you, she will probably refuse the drink (or just walk away with it)?

I just feel like you have to have a game plan that extends further than that drink. Have something interesting to say. They're pick-up lines when they're cheesy and insincere. Saying something actually charming right off the bat has probably never served a guy wrong.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 01:28 PM
Its 2011....women have super powers these days...and^ obviously have careers that are more important than happiness. Give them some normal conversation, have them buy you drinks and fuckl their fat friend.

By the way...drunk women at bars are annoying as fuck. Intelligent drunk women at bars are even worse. Nothing says stay away more than a bitchy, confident, drunk chick.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 01:29 PM
I feel like this is getting blown out of proportion, a little. No one was complaining about guys hitting on chicks or buying them drinks, btw. It's just a tad bit awkward when a guy doesn't bother to make small talk first. It immediately makes the girl feel some level of obligation before you've even said hi to her.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 01:30 PM
Its 2011....women have super powers these days...and^ obviously have careers that are more important than happiness. Give them some normal conversation, have them buy you drinks and fuckl their fat friend.

You seem incredibly discontent about the fact that women have good careers. I repeat, your opinions about women are really strange and somewhat inconsistent with the rest of the reasonably forward-thinking views you seem to present.

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 01:31 PM
I'm also at a complete loss when it comes to striking up conversation with a total stranger. Has little to do with dating, really, but it's why I don't buy girls drinks. What on earth do you open with that won't sound rediculous, overly-aggressive or just painfully obvious? Its just a really socially awkward way to meet. There has to be at least some context, some shared experience to rap about.

Just be friendly. Find something unique about her that you feel you can relate to and run with it. Compliments are generally nice, if they come off as sincere (i.e. don't compliment for the sake of complimenting, find something that it appears she took some pride in)... ask questions, show genuine interest... don't be afraid to crack a dumb joke (dumb as in goofy, not dumb as in racist)...

And if all else fails...rohypnol.

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 01:34 PM
I feel like this is getting blown out of proportion, a little. No one was complaining about guys hitting on chicks or buying them drinks, btw. It's just a tad bit awkward when a guy doesn't bother to make small talk first. It immediately makes the girl feel some level of obligation before you've even said hi to her.

That I've never understood. I would think that the woman would assume his first intentions are to get her drunk (which past college, gets pretty creepy I'd imagine). Just throwing money at her hoping it will stick. Kinda bush league, actually.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:34 PM
Give them some normal conversation, have them buy you drinks and fuckl their fat friend.





fuckl

Gribbz
07-11-2011, 01:35 PM
Just be friendly. Find something unique about her that you feel you can relate to and run with it. Compliments are generally nice, if they come off as sincere (i.e. don't compliment for the sake of complimenting, find something that it appears she took some pride in)... ask questions, show genuine interest... don't be afraid to crack a dumb joke (dumb as in goofy, not dumb as in racist)...

This is pretty much what I do. It generally works.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 01:38 PM
I feel like this is getting blown out of proportion, a little. No one was complaining about guys hitting on chicks or buying them drinks, btw. It's just a tad bit awkward when a guy doesn't bother to make small talk first. It immediately makes the girl feel some level of obligation before you've even said hi to her.

Guys at bars looking to meet for a hook up are idiots...they use booze as lube to ease the situation. They're thinking "hey, I seem to get my ass kicked and get into fights alot easier when im drunk. Mabee I can get a chick to talk to me or kick my ass if I get her drunk too."

Places to find normal chicks: the beach, book stores,funerals , weddings, parks, gyms.

People aren't themselves when they drink. So why start off a relationship/friendship slurring your speech and being crosseyed. Bars are for getting drunk and making mistakes.

rskapcat
07-11-2011, 01:39 PM
A guy hit on me in the grocery store a few weeks ago. (Being the spaz I am, I forgot to put my wedding ring back on after my Bar Method class.) My instinct was to drop my groceries and run away or just blurt out whargarbl, so the fact that I managed actual words and exited the conversation with grace is astounding.

If I were single, I would probably also awkwardly thank the drink buyer and walk away if no conversation had occurred before the drink.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 01:40 PM
you could always go up to them and ask them if they like coachella. then you just flash your wristband you're still wearing and they swoon....they always swoon.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 01:42 PM
Guys at bars looking to meet for a hook up are idiots...they use booze as lube to ease the situation. They're thinking "hey, I seem to get my ass kicked and get into fights alot easier when im drunk. Mabee I can get a chick to talk to me or kick my ass if I get her drunk too."

Places to find normal chicks: the beach, book stores, funerals, weddings, parks, gyms.

People aren't themselves when they drink. So why start off a relationship/friendship slurring your speech and being crosseyed. Bars are for getting drunk and making mistakes.

in what way is this different? you're just using a highly emotional situation to pick them up.

they also aren't themselves when they're saying goodbye for the final time to a loved one.

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 01:42 PM
Guys at bars looking to meet for a hook up are idiots...they use booze as lube to ease the situation. They're thinking "hey, I seem to get my ass kicked and get into fights alot easier when im drunk. Mabee I can get a chick to talk to me or kick my ass if I get her drunk too."

Places to find normal chicks: the beach, book stores,funerals , weddings, parks, gyms.

People aren't themselves when they drink. So why start off a relationship/friendship slurring your speech and being crosseyed. Bars are for getting drunk and making mistakes.

I can understand why people say you make no goddamn sense with bookend sentences like the bolded ones.

Gribbz
07-11-2011, 01:42 PM
you could always go up to them and ask them if they like coachella. then you just flash your wristband you're still wearing and they swoon....they always swoon.


Ha, funny you say that. I wear Coachella shirts constantly and girls have definitely struck up conversations with me due to that fact.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 01:43 PM
you could always go up to them and ask them if they like coachella. then you just flash your wristband you're still wearing and they swoon....they always swoon.

Are you suggesting you've gotten laid before?

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:45 PM
Guys at bars looking to meet for a hook up are idiots...they use booze as lube to ease the situation. They're thinking "hey, I seem to get my ass kicked and get into fights alot easier when im drunk. Mabee I can get a chick to talk to me or kick my ass if I get her drunk too."

Places to find normal chicks: the beach, book stores,funerals , weddings, parks, gyms.

People aren't themselves when they drink. So why start off a relationship/friendship slurring your speech and being crosseyed. Bars are for getting drunk and making mistakes.

EVERYONE IN A BAR IS DRUNK

A NORMAL WOMAN WILL NOT EVER BE IN A BAR

EVERYONE WHO DRINKS GETS DRUNK WHEN THEY DRINK

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 01:46 PM
Are you suggesting you've gotten laid before?

yes, because unlike you i don't hate women

hydr1
07-11-2011, 01:47 PM
in what way is this different? you're just using a highly emotional situation to pick them up.

they also aren't themselves when they're saying goodbye for the final time to a loved one.

Every person at a wedding or funeral isn't emotional or even tied to the dead/married party. How many weddings have you been to and not been emotional? How many funerals? The point is that at a funeral or wedding people are with their spouse. If they are not with someone, more than likely they are wishing they were. People are forced to think about these things when they are subjected to other couples supporting eachother emotionally.

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 01:48 PM
Every person at a wedding or funeral isn't emotional or even tied to the dead/married party. How many weddings have you been to and not been emotional? How many funerals? The point is that at a funeral or wedding people are with their spouse. If they are not with someone, more than likely they are wishing they were. People are forced to think about these things when they are subjected to other couples supporting eachother emotionally.

So loneliness is not an emotion.... go on....

Gribbz
07-11-2011, 01:48 PM
EVERYONE IN A BAR IS DRUNK

A NORMAL WOMAN WILL NOT EVER BE IN A BAR

EVERYONE WHO DRINKS GETS DRUNK WHEN THEY DRINK

It's all so simple!

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:50 PM
Every person at a wedding or funeral isn't emotional or even tied to the dead/married party. How many weddings have you been to and not been emotional? How many funerals? The point is that at a funeral or wedding people are with their spouse. If they are not with someone, more than likely they are wishing they were. People are forced to think about these things when they are subjected to other couples supporting eachother emotionally.

EVERYONE AT A WEDDING OR FUNERAL IS MARRIED AND WITH THE PERSON THEY ARE MARRIED TO.

ANYONE NOT MARRIED WISHES THAT THEY WERE MARRIED. NOBODY IS AGAINST BEING MARRIED OR INDIFFERENT TO BEING MARRIED.

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 01:52 PM
*sarcasm now beaten to death by mja*

chiapet
07-11-2011, 01:53 PM
Oh my god... hit on girls at funerals. You come across like an emotionally stunted idiot.


If I were single, I would probably also awkwardly thank the drink buyer and walk away if no conversation had occurred before the drink.

Well, I find both you and Corinna completely charming, so I'm going to assume this is actually the correct reaction. What would you do if some strange girl bought you a drink but just stood there staring at you? :pulse

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:54 PM
It's not sarcasm. I'm outlining the logical assumptions that would have to be true for hydr1's claims to be correct.

You fucking idiot.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:54 PM
I usually just buy girls nachos.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:55 PM
"Eat up, Legs."

hydr1
07-11-2011, 01:55 PM
EVERYONE IN A BAR IS DRUNK

A NORMAL WOMAN WILL NOT EVER BE IN A BAR

EVERYONE WHO DRINKS GETS DRUNK WHEN THEY DRINK

Yes...go on.

I agree...and yes I hate most HUMANS. Doesn't matter what sex they are. People that are caught up with getting laid and getting wasted have issues. They lack game. Some people these things are second nature. I do my best to make a bad impression with everyone I meet. Why? Because morons like you ( forum haters) are always going to judge and know it all. Yet your here online talking about how to get laid....and suggesting a coachella shirt or a certain conversation is going to win over someone and convince them to love you.

This is all subjective. What's going to happen when you argue with a chick you met at a bar? She's going to go back to the bar, be an emotional wreck and bang some other horny idiot. She's going to take her wedding ring off and go drink at a bar and look for attention from someone else.

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 01:55 PM
I usually just buy girls nachos.

But you hold them, so if they want to keep eating they have to stay and talk. Sounds effective to me.

NachoCat
07-11-2011, 01:56 PM
I went to a wedding once with a girlfriend and wished I was single. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. fuck I think by saying it out loud I might rip a hole in the universe or something. The space time continuum of dating is about to implode. Im sorry guys :/

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:57 PM
Yes...go on.

I agree...and yes I hate most HUMANS. Doesn't matter what sex they are. People that are caught up with getting laid and getting wasted have issues. They lack game. Some people these things are second nature. I do my best to make a bad impression with everyone I meet. Why? Because morons like you ( forum haters) are always going to judge and know it all. Yet your here online talking about how to get laid....and suggesting a coachella shirt or a certain conversation is going to win over someone and convince them to love you.

This is all subjective. What's going to happen when you argue with a chick you met at a bar? She's going to go back to the bar, be an emotional wreck and bang some other horny idiot. She's going to take her wedding ring off and go drink at a bar and look for attention from someone else.

IF YOU ARGUE WITH A GIRL IT IS IMPOSSIBLE THAT SHE WILL THEN GO TO A BAR.

PEOPLE WHO GO TO BARS ONLY AND ALWAYS GO TO BARS.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 01:57 PM
The point is that at a funeral or wedding people are with their spouse.


your whole point was that you are there to pick up women dummy.


People are forced to think about these things when they are subjected to other couples supporting eachother emotionally.

so you're taking advantage.............

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 01:57 PM
^^^ Yeah, and your implied acceptance of those assumptions is one of sarcasm. I get what you're trying to do.

And yet, I've only noticed two discernible skills you possess: ability to be an internet douchebag, and ability to be an internet asshole. Both of them extremely rare and valuable skills which will certainly lead to decades of success going forward. Riches await you, sir!

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:58 PM
Why are you ripping on poor nathanfairchild?

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 01:59 PM
Also, you clearly haven't read enough of my 11,000+ posts. Many of them are compassionate.

amyzzz
07-11-2011, 02:01 PM
Because morons like you ( forum haters) are always going to judge and know it all.
Admitting defeat so soon?

chiapet
07-11-2011, 02:01 PM
Nachos?! I KNEW you liked fat girls!!

hydr1
07-11-2011, 02:01 PM
If any of you had this shit figured out, you wouldn't be online talking about TRYING to get laid at bars.

Yet somehow you all are turning this into what a woman hater I am and how shallow I am. I am very traditional. One night stands, drunk hook ups, cheating, kissing strangers a strangers ass ect.<---- all that is for clowns.

I do my best to avoid relationships. When they happen they happen. Love is a curse and I hope all you freaks get what you deserve someday. Someday you will be in love and you too will be fucked.

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 02:01 PM
@ mja... Compassionate with your grammar correction? Fantastic.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:03 PM
Well, I don't want people going outside of the friendly confines of the Coachella Message Board and appearing like buffoons because of simple grammatical errors.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:04 PM
Nachos?! I KNEW you liked fat girls!!

It's actually a trap. If they accept the nachos, I take them back to the sorority house and make them stand on a table in their underwear while we circle all of their "trouble spots" with permanent marker.

locachica73
07-11-2011, 02:12 PM
Reading the last 3 pages has made me like my boyfriend a little more.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 02:15 PM
I have been trapped in relationships since 1998.
there were never times when I was telling people or thinking, "man I need to get laid"
Hate me all you want....but I've NEVER ever had a problem being loved, getting fucked or having a good time with women.

I attribute it to my disgust in the matter. My fear of being attatched.

Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance. Make some money, make some art...there's soooo many things better than blowing your money trying to win over some chick. Do you people really spend this much time wishing and working on getting a piece of ass? Guys are out there buying nice cars and working their asses off to impress women and land a better catch, in hopes of one day being married to her and having a happy family. Then one day you wake up and your divorced and half of everything you ever worked for is givven to some whack woman that you thought you'd tricked.

Kind of like a job. Don't show up and give them everything ya got right away. They're just going to expect more. When you can't give them more, they will find someone new that is willing to kiss ass and be walked all over.

Whatever though...like I said. I don't give a shit about lust and meeting more selfish humans. Everyone is out for thiers and its a pathetic game. I don't belive you should be trying so hard if it was meant to be. It will happen on its own. Its a curse.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:15 PM
This is groundbreaking stuff.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:17 PM
I have been trapped in relationships since 1998.
there were never times when I was telling people or thinking, "man I need to get laid"
Hate me all you want....but I've NEVER ever had a problem being loved, getting fucked or having a good time with women.

I attribute it to my disgust in the matter. My fear of being attatched.

Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance. Make some money, make some art...there's soooo many things better than blowing your money trying to win over some chick. Do you people really spend this much time wishing and working on getting a piece of ass? Guys are out there buying nice cars and working their asses off to impress women and land a better catch, in hopes of one day being married to her and having a happy family. Then one day you wake up and your divorced and half of everything you ever worked for is givven to some whack woman that you thought you'd tricked.

Kind of like a job. Don't show up and give them everything ya got right away. They're just going to expect more. When you can't give them more, they will find someone new that is willing to kiss ass and be walked all over.

Whatever though...like I said. I don't give a shit about lust and meeting more selfish humans. Everyone is out for thiers and its a pathetic game. I don't belive you should be trying so hard if it was meant to be. It will happen on its own. Its a curse.

Is the hypothetical divorce the hypothetical woman's fault?

chiapet
07-11-2011, 02:17 PM
What the fuck does that have to do with buying a chick a drink in a bar?
You said it yourself that people picking up in a bar aren't looking to get married and have 2.5 kids.

Your low sex drive doesn't make you better than anyone else. :)

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 02:19 PM
My favorite part is where he harpoons everybody for acting like they "know it all" in between overlong philosophical diatribes encapsulating how he's decided the world works.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:19 PM
Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance.

Ok, like what?

Make some money

Oh.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 02:19 PM
What's going to happen when you argue with a chick you met at a bar? She's going to go back to the bar, be an emotional wreck and bang some other horny idiot. She's going to take her wedding ring off and go drink at a bar and look for attention from someone else.

You would write the worst choose-your-own-adventure book ever.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:21 PM
My favorite part is where he harpoons everybody for acting like they "know it all" in between overlong philosophical diatribes encapsulating how he's decided the world works.

But you have to admit it's a pretty novel and edgy stance: I mean, a GUY ... that DOESN'T WANT TO PUT MUCH EFFORT INTO GETTING A GIRLFRIEND?!?!

Suck on that reality, SOCIETY!

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 02:23 PM
Sheep like you and me just don't get it, Malcolm. Drinks?

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 02:24 PM
I have been trapped in relationships since 1998.
there were never times when I was telling people or thinking, "man I need to get laid"
Hate me all you want....but I've NEVER ever had a problem being loved, getting fucked or having a good time with women.

I attribute it to my disgust in the matter. My fear of being attatched.

Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance. Make some money, make some art...there's soooo many things better than blowing your money trying to win over some chick. Do you people really spend this much time wishing and working on getting a piece of ass? Guys are out there buying nice cars and working their asses off to impress women and land a better catch, in hopes of one day being married to her and having a happy family. Then one day you wake up and your divorced and half of everything you ever worked for is givven to some whack woman that you thought you'd tricked.

Kind of like a job. Don't show up and give them everything ya got right away. They're just going to expect more. When you can't give them more, they will find someone new that is willing to kiss ass and be walked all over.

Whatever though...like I said. I don't give a shit about lust and meeting more selfish humans. Everyone is out for thiers and its a pathetic game. I don't belive you should be trying so hard if it was meant to be. It will happen on its own. Its a curse.

yeah maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan. you're just so above it all. go put a bird on it.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:25 PM
You would write the worst choose-your-own-adventure book ever.



You've reached the Enchanted Dungeon. The Princess is locked inside a golden cage, guarded by the Dragon Master. The Sword of Elders dangles from a long chain affixed to the ceiling in the center of the room.

DO YOU:
A: FORGET ABOUT THE PRINCESS BECAUSE YOU KNOW ALL SHE IS CONCERNED WITH IS MONEY AND THE SECOND SHE MEETS SOME OTHER KNIGHT WITH A NICER BMW THAT WEDDING RING IS COMING OFF

OR

B: LEAVE AND GO TO AN ART EXHIBITION BECAUSE MAYBE THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE THERE THAT ACTUALLY THINK INSTEAD OF SPENDING THEIR ENTIRE LIFE DRUNK IN A BAR HOOKING UP WITH PEOPLE BECAUSE THAT IS SERIOUSLY THE ONLY THINK THEY CAN THINK ABOUT

rskapcat
07-11-2011, 02:29 PM
'Baby batter' needs to be excised from the world's slang vocabulary NOW. I actually make the "might barf" face when I read it.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 02:30 PM
Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.

I've never been to a strip club, never had a one night stand. I just think that shits not real. Its like going to church or eating a candy bar. It makes you feel good. How many other thingss make you feel good though? If your out there doing rad shit and having fun doing things of suubstance your going to attract more people than you will trying to be witty and spit game in a bar. Meet a chick at the rock climbing gym for example. You share something in common. Your both being healthy. Your both in shape. You can see muscles and skin while using your brain and body. Your overcoming challenges.

Is that a better adventure book than sharing an addiction in common, both being unable to walk or see straight, standing on the smoking patio, being in a dim lit room and not knowing if the person your talking to looks deformed or its just the lighting/booze. Your wasting money and adding pounds onto your ass?

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:31 PM
Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.

I've never been to a strip club, never had a one night stand. I just think that shits not real. Its like going to church or eating a candy bar. It makes you feel good. How many other thingss make you feel good though? If your out there doing rad shit and having fun doing things of suubstance your going to attract more people than you will trying to be witty and spit game in a bar. Meet a chick at the rock climbing gym for example. You share something in common. Your both being healthy. Your both in shape. You can see muscles and skin while using your brain and body. Your overcoming challenges.

Is that a better adventure book than sharing an addiction in common, both being unable to walk or see straight, standing on the smoking patio, being in a dim lit room and not knowing if the person your talking to looks deformed or its just the lighting/booze. Your wasting money and adding pounds onto your ass?

Do you have as big of a problem with the proper form of "you're" as you do with sex?

BROKENDOLL
07-11-2011, 02:33 PM
Reading the last 3 pages has made me like my boyfriend a little more.
After reading the last 3 pages, I think I've realized my soulmate has been in the upper left hand side of my underwear drawer all this time.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:34 PM
Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.



http://images.wikia.com/southpark/images/c/cd/Goth_Kids.png

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 02:34 PM
Wait isn't this the guy who got so drunk he threw water on his girlfriend because she passed out instead of having sex with him?

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 02:35 PM
Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.

I've never been to a strip club, never had a one night stand. I just think that shits not real. Its like going to church or eating a candy bar. It makes you feel good. How many other thingss make you feel good though? If your out there doing rad shit and having fun doing things of suubstance your going to attract more people than you will trying to be witty and spit game in a bar. Meet a chick at the rock climbing gym for example. You share something in common. Your both being healthy. Your both in shape. You can see muscles and skin while using your brain and body. Your overcoming challenges.

Is that a better adventure book than sharing an addiction in common, both being unable to walk or see straight, standing on the smoking patio, being in a dim lit room and not knowing if the person your talking to looks deformed or its just the lighting/booze. Your wasting money and adding pounds onto your ass?

you sound genuinely unhappy

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 02:36 PM
Also MJA that was fantastic.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:37 PM
Thanks. I just felt like doing something of substance.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 02:38 PM
like making money?

locachica73
07-11-2011, 02:38 PM
Wait isn't this the guy who got so drunk he threw water on his girlfriend because she passed out instead of having sex with him?

I was thinking the exact same thing but get people confused too often so I was planning to go back and verify, thanks for confirming for me.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 02:42 PM
The only way I am better is if different is better. Im not sorry that I don't think like everyone else. I don't regret being in a relationship with my girl. Im happy. That's prob why im not worried about impressing people online or in public. I have everything I want already. Just riding the gravy train now and paying my dues. I will repeat though that falling in love is a curse, especially for someone who thinks like I do. My girl and everyone else I know thinks like the rest of you, so ill assume im the freak. I for sure the freak here.

I really hope you all find what you are looking for and enjoy the mystery of what might pop up during on of your watering hole adventures.

So this is my confession I guess. I don't give a fuck what women or anyone else thinks and im not going to waste my time trying to figure out how to trap someone or trick them into loving me. I have plenty that love me the way I am. Retarded, selfish, weird and illiterate.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:43 PM
http://img825.imageshack.us/img825/1491/8760927.jpg

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 02:43 PM
The only way I am better is if different is better. Im not sorry that I don't think like everyone else. I don't regret being in a relationship with my girl. Im happy. That's prob why im not worried about impressing people online or in public. I have everything I want already. Just riding the gravy train now and paying my dues. I will repeat though that falling in love is a curse, especially for someone who thinks like I do. My girl and everyone else I know thinks like the rest of you, so ill assume im the freak. I for sure the freak here.

I really hope you all find what you are looking for and enjoy the mystery of what might pop up during on of your watering hole adventures.

So this is my confession I guess. I don't give a fuck what women or anyone else thinks and im not going to waste my time trying to figure out how to trap someone or trick them into loving me. I have plenty that love me the way I am. Retarded, selfish, weird and illiterate.

i guess all that's left is to just kill yourself

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:44 PM
The only way I am better is if different is better. Im not sorry that I don't think like everyone else. I don't regret being in a relationship with my girl. Im happy. That's prob why im not worried about impressing people online or in public. I have everything I want already. Just riding the gravy train now and paying my dues. I will repeat though that falling in love is a curse, especially for someone who thinks like I do. My girl and everyone else I know thinks like the rest of you, so ill assume im the freak. I for sure the freak here.

I really hope you all find what you are looking for and enjoy the mystery of what might pop up during on of your watering hole adventures.

So this is my confession I guess. I don't give a fuck what women or anyone else thinks and im not going to waste my time trying to figure out how to trap someone or trick them into loving me. I have plenty that love me the way I am. Retarded, selfish, weird and illiterate.

You're very unique.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 02:44 PM
MJA, you have made me choke on my beverage (Let's face it, I go to bars, so I must *always* be drinking) TWICE in the last hour. You're causing me distress.

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 02:45 PM
I wish I could find a pithier way to suggest a Higher Plane Pseudoenlightened Being of the Week award.

BROKENDOLL
07-11-2011, 02:46 PM
I like hydr1.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:47 PM
hydr1, how did you meet your girlfriend?

hydr1
07-11-2011, 02:48 PM
Wait isn't this the guy who got so drunk he threw water on his girlfriend because she passed out instead of having sex with him?

Yes...after meeting my girlfriend and being in a relationship for four years we have gotten drunk a few times...what does that have to do with you being a bitch when a creep is trying to buy you a drink? He was hoping you were broke or shallow enough to fall for it. You were wishing he had something of substance to offer.

You came online to confess that you don't know how to react to this.

Im just trying to tell you that the only substance in a bar is alcohol and urine.

Btw...im very happy and talking about this makes me even happier. I didn't expect any of you to understand or be any different than the rest of the people trying to use booze to add some adventure to their lives.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 02:49 PM
hydr1, how did you meet your girlfriend?

I wasn't trying to meet her...she was there and we started talking.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:49 PM
Where is "there"?

ThatGirl
07-11-2011, 02:50 PM
MJA I'm crying with laughter right now.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 02:52 PM
...what does that have to do with you being a bitch when a creep is trying to buy you a drink? He was hoping you were broke or shallow enough to fall for it. You were wishing he had something of substance to offer.

I guess if there's one thing everyone should know about me it's that I wish for substance.

BROKENDOLL
07-11-2011, 02:52 PM
I'm about to embark on an adventure.

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 02:52 PM
I guess if there's one thing everyone should know about me it's that I wish for substance.

Shut up you sad empty she-husk. Nobody cares about your pathetic life at the dives.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 02:53 PM
I'm not real.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:53 PM
I really am genuinely interested as to what the venue in which hydr1 met his girlfriend was.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:54 PM
I have a good hunch about which substance you wish for.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 02:54 PM
What's funny, is that you get so caught up on the punctuation in the word you'r

But at the same time, you don't get caught up in the puntuation in the sentence

Do something of substance, make some money, make some art.

I didn't type

Do something of substance: make some money, make some art.

You see now you fucking dumbshit? That making money and doing things of substance were two seperate things all together? Do you see how your gramatical criticism has just discounted your lame ass joke?

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 02:55 PM
hydr1, if cancer is a substance, I hope you get it.

Also, you didn't answer his question.

JebusLives
07-11-2011, 02:56 PM
I just want to interject that, a few pages back, some of you might have gotten the idea that I wanted pickup advice. I was just saying that buying a girl a drink as a pretext for subsequent conversation is a genuinely awkward way to build a rapport, and that's probably why Chia feels awkward when approached that way.

I totally don't care what you guys think or anything (i just don't work that way, you know? Like you people), so I'm not sure why i'm even clarifying.

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 02:56 PM
Shhhh everybody hydr1 is being interesting.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 02:56 PM
You've been discounted, MJA. See you at the back of Safeway with the fifty-cent sippy cups.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 02:57 PM
What's funny, is that you get so caught up on the punctuation in the word you'r



Checkmate.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 02:58 PM
also hydr1, how can you be so against alcohol, when all you could talk about in the bonnaroo thread was about all the drugs you took that weekend?

hydr1
07-11-2011, 02:59 PM
You are my cancer you pathetic internet dweeb

JebusLives
07-11-2011, 03:00 PM
also hydr1, how can you be so against alcohol, when all you could talk about in the bonnaroo thread was about all the drugs you took that weekend?

You won't understand. he's like, waaaaaaay up here, right? And you're all way down there. How does one even begin?

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:00 PM
Im too selfish to give a fuck...go spank off and get the baby batter off the brain and talk about or do something of substance. Make some money, make some art...there's soooo many things better than blowing your money trying to win over some chick.

For the record, you wrote this. There was a period. You wrote a sentence encouraging people to talk about or do something of substance. Then you ended the sentence with a period. Then you immediately started a new sentence listing examples of things one could do, presumably, things of substance.

Seriously, though, WHERE did you meet your girlfriend?

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 03:00 PM
also hydr1, how can you be so against alcohol, when all you could talk about in the bonnaroo thread was about all the drugs you took that weekend?

Taking enough drugs to make the Teletubbies interesting = mind-expansion

Having a few drinks at your local watering hole = being a mindless, carbon-wasting drunk whore

Logical!

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:02 PM
You won't understand. he's like, waaaaaaay up here, right? And you're all way down there. How does one even begin?

Shutup, dumdum. He's the first person to ever have the inclination that getting drunk and hooking up with drunk people is not rewarding. He's also the first person to doubt the value of random hookups and of relationships. These are foreign concepts to us all, and he will lead us into a new age.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:02 PM
also hydr1, how can you be so against alcohol, when all you could talk about in the bonnaroo thread was about all the drugs you took that weekend?

We could probably use some quotes ASAP, just to make sure you're not misrepresenting what he said.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:05 PM
also hydr1, how can you be so against alcohol, when all you could talk about in the bonnaroo thread was about all the drugs you took that weekend?

How could you not have been aborted? Fucking Damien. Im not against alcohol moron. Im against trying to pick up on a date in a bar. Mabee you should pay more attention to what the conversation is about and spend less time trying to get these other tards to be your buddy. Pull your tounge out of the forums ass and mind your own business...noone is even responding to you or enjoying you or hating on you. Nothing.

PotVsKtl
07-11-2011, 03:05 PM
What do all you people do once you've got the women picked up? I tend to opt for a Warrior Press Slam, but I've heard the Tombstone Powerdriver puts them out like a light.

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 03:06 PM
Ever see House of Wax? It's sort of like that. That way I can use the carpool lane.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:07 PM
How could you not have been aborted? Fucking Damien. Im not against alcohol moron. Im against trying to pick up on a date in a bar. Mabee you should pay more attention to what the conversation is about and spend less time trying to get these other tards to be your buddy. Pull your tounge out of the forums ass and mind your own business...noone is even responding to you or enjoying you or hating on you. Nothing.

So, if you're not against alcohol or the effects of alcohol on people, I take it you are against bars for their architectural design? Or business plans?

Would you be ok with getting drunk and looking to meet people anywhere else so long as it wasn't a bar?

Let's dig deeper.

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 03:07 PM
Plus if you mold their hands right it's like lifesize Playmobil.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 03:08 PM
Another thread ruined by hydr1. I guess this was kind of a miserable thread to begin with, though.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 03:08 PM
How could you not have been aborted? Fucking Damien. Im not against alcohol moron. Im against trying to pick up on a date in a bar. Mabee you should pay more attention to what the conversation is about and spend less time trying to get these other tards to be your buddy. Pull your tounge out of the forums ass and mind your own business...noone is even responding to you or enjoying you or hating on you. Nothing.

*maybe

Look how angry you're getting.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:08 PM
I met my girlfriend at a polo match.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 03:09 PM
How substantial!

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:10 PM
Just to clarify, you are not against alcohol or other intoxicants GENERALLY. However, you are against alcohol or other intoxicants in the context of trying to meet a date.

Is that right?

JebusLives
07-11-2011, 03:10 PM
I also deeply want to know how and where you met the future Mrs. Hydr1. In my head it was sort of like Cold Mountain.

edit: Too late

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:10 PM
*maybe

Look how angry you're getting.

Im not angry at all. Im lauging. Oh wait. Sorry laughing.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:11 PM
Just to clarify, you are not against alcohol or other intoxicants GENERALLY. However, you are against alcohol or other intoxicants in the context of trying to meet a date.

Is that right?

Generally yes

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:12 PM
Another thread ruined by hydr1. I guess this was kind of a miserable thread to begin with, though.

The content and contributers were pretty pathetic.

JebusLives
07-11-2011, 03:13 PM
Back on track, I confess that I may have nailed hydr1's lady friend at polo yesterday. She was waaaaaasted.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:15 PM
That statement sounds more like a confession that your not funny.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:15 PM
Ok, so just to summarize, your grand anti-establishment stance and manifesto against the common man, the belief that you feel places you on the outskirts of formal society, is that being drunk is not the ideal condition under which to meet someone you want to date?

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:16 PM
Ok, so just to summarize, your grand anti-establishment stance and manifesto against the common man, the belief that you feel places you on the outskirts of formal society, is that being drunk is not the ideal condition under which to meet someone you want to date?

Im a sociopath yes

JebusLives
07-11-2011, 03:18 PM
drunk in a bar

hawkingvsreeve
07-11-2011, 03:19 PM
Woof.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:19 PM
Im a sociopath yes

I wouldn't say that. It's more that you're not particularly interesting.

ramblinon
07-11-2011, 03:21 PM
Polo matches = best place to meet women in stupid hats pretending to have class but who, when wasted on mint julips, are still just common bar sluts, except that they only bang guys with an extra 0 at the end of their paychecks.

NachoCat
07-11-2011, 03:21 PM
You seem pretty fuckin intrested in him MJA , just sayin.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:21 PM
Well, I'm not interesting, either.

NachoCat
07-11-2011, 03:21 PM
Polo matches = best place to meet women in stupid hats pretending to have class but who, when wasted on mint julips, are still just common bar sluts, except that they only bang guys with an extra 0 at the end of their paychecks.


Good point

JebusLives
07-11-2011, 03:22 PM
MJA seems particularly disinterested in his job today, you mean.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 03:31 PM
But quite interested in making me snort with laughter.

amyzzz
07-11-2011, 03:32 PM
I didn't expect any of you to understand or be any different than the rest of the people trying to use booze to add some adventure to their lives.
This from the guy who asked me drinking questions in the bmotw thread.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:36 PM
Malcom is funny.
Nathan is just trying too hard and sounding like a little dipshit that wants a black eye.

Sorry to get you all so upset. I know you don't like to hear about the reality of picking up dates at a bar. I just think you should try something else if what your doing is obviously not working (guys) and girls, lighten up and fucking smile. Seriously telling me how I seem unhappy and how I hate women? Too many stuck up bitches that don't know how to react to a man being nice and buying them a drink. Smile and say thanks and be honest. If the guy is ugly or creepy, tell him so.

If we were all drunk at a bar arguing about this, id buy malcom a drink before anyone else.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 03:37 PM
I burped and it tasted like Jack Daniels. It was pretty substantial.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:38 PM
This from the guy who asked me drinking questions in the bmotw thread.

And??? I was trying to see if you were a dumb drunk bitch...congrats. you passed the test.

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 03:38 PM
This is the most I have laughed on here since joining this forum. The last few pages have been classic.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:40 PM
For the record, I will drink more whiskey than any of you clowns any day of the week.
I can guarantee that nothing we talk about or do afterwards will have any substance.

Its not that being a drunk is lame...its trying to seek a future in a pothouse that's lame.

PotVsKtl
07-11-2011, 03:41 PM
Pothouse.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 03:41 PM
I seek my future in public toilets.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 03:42 PM
You can read the streaks like tea leaves.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:42 PM
I seek my future in public toilets.

Glory hole hero

amyzzz
07-11-2011, 03:43 PM
And??? I was trying to see if you were a dumb drunk bitch...congrats. you passed the test.
Woohoo, I'm just a dumb bitch.

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 03:43 PM
Holy cow - is hydr1 British?

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:45 PM
Holy cow - is hydr1 British?
Here here...ill be anything you want me to be. Im your huckleberry

Nathan is taking a long time with those quotes.

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 03:46 PM
For the record, I will drink more whiskey than any of you clowns any day of the week.
I can guarantee that nothing we talk about or do afterwards will have any substance.

It would appear that very little of what you talk about before drinks has any substance, either. This may well be where your bias comes from. It's liquor, not magic.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 03:48 PM
Here here...ill be anything you want me to be. Im your huckleberry

Nathan is taking a long time with those quotes.

I just got off work and had to drive home. I stay off my phone on the road. I'm glad you're eagerly awaiting my response to one of your many contradictions though.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:51 PM
It would appear that very little of what you talk about before drinks has any substance, either. This may well be where your bias comes from. It's liquor, not magic.

Because we have had so many conversations right? Another internet personality trying to fill its life with joy by making ironic, hypocritical statements.

It would appear that your a 300 pound hairy man as well...but I can't say that for sure now can I? Why don't you go take a bath with your toaster oven hannah.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 03:53 PM
Toaster friend, you and me, we are best friends.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 03:53 PM
It would appear that very little of what you talk about before drinks has any substance, either. This may well be where your bias comes from. It's liquor, not magic.

Hannah, I think I love you. It's probably those beers I had after lunch doing the talking though...

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 03:53 PM
Do you want it to be plugged or unplugged, hydr1?

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 03:54 PM
I'm going to go kill an animal for science. I hope there's something of substance by the time I come back.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:54 PM
I just got off work and had to drive home. I stay off my phone on the road. I'm glad you're eagerly awaiting my response to one of your many contradictions though.

You have no idea how eager I am Nathan. I really appreciate your diligence and perseverance at attempting to fit in and clown on me here. For some reason though, everyone else seems funny. You seem like a cunt and I can't wait to meet you sweetheart.

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 03:55 PM
I met my toaster oven at a bar. Things come full circle.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 03:57 PM
This is why you clowns can't get fucked.

nathanfairchild
07-11-2011, 03:58 PM
You have no idea how eager I am Nathan. I really appreciate your diligence and perseverance at attempting to fit in and clown on me here. For some reason though, everyone else seems funny. You seem like a cunt and I can't wait to meet you sweetheart.

Thing is I wasn't trying to be funny in any of those posts. Most of the time I was just pointing out the problems I had with your reasoning. You're the one who got all bent out of shape about it. And trust me, there will never be a scenario in which we'll meet.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 03:58 PM
hydr1, could you explain why any chick who disagrees with you is labeled by you as a "300 pound hairy man?" You've used that exact description a few times. You truly do seem to have a problem with independent women, whether that be in their career or financial success or solely holding to their own opinions in discourse with men. You call it "traditional;" I call it misogynistic and insecure.

I'm not a feminist nor a man-hating lesbian, so save yourself the effort of typing it out once more. This isn't about "men," it's personal and specific to you. I've tried to be nice to you because, inexplicably, people I regard as friends seem to think you're okay. It's baffling. There is nothing there that warrants tolerance of you.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 04:00 PM
Thing is I wasn't trying to be funny in any of those posts. Most of the time I was just pointing out the problems I had with your reasoning. You're the one who got all bent out of shape about it. And trust me, there will never be a scenario in which we'll meet.

Your loss my grammatically elite little fucktoy. We could have made magic.

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 04:02 PM
He's better IRL.

JebusLives
07-11-2011, 04:03 PM
hydr1, could you explain why any chick who disagrees with you is labeled by you as a "300 pound hairy man?"

I think he just enjoys the idea that this is some sort of electric bear party. I know I do :thu

hydr1
07-11-2011, 04:09 PM
hydr1, could you explain why any chick who disagrees with you is labeled by you as a "300 pound hairy man?" You've used that exact description a few times. You truly do seem to have a problem with independent women, whether that be in their career or financial success or solely holding to their own opinions in discourse with men. You call it "traditional;" I call it misogynistic and insecure.

I'm not a feminist nor a man-hating lesbian, so save yourself the effort of typing it out once more. This isn't about "men," it's personal and specific to you. I've tried to be nice to you because, inexplicably, people I regard as friends seem to think you're okay. It's baffling. There is nothing there that warrants tolerance of you.

Don't flatter yourself....and id like to see the quote where I used that exact wording. Mabee im just not very original and im a one trick pony. I don't have a problem with anyone honey. Especially internet "women". Call it what you want. Im glad you have an opinion. It will continue to mean nothing to me or my reality. You don't need to tollerate me. You don't need to understand me. I cannot tollerate or understand myself. the people you regard as friends might be as crazy as myself to think I am a good person.


Your judging someone by what letters on a computer monitor are showing you. That sounds like a personal problem more than anything. I have judged you as well. I have issues. I have come to the conclusion that I like you. Nothing that anyone says or does will convince me otherwise. This has been a fun time and I think you should realize that if you did know me, you'd know that you can NEVER, EVER take ANYTHING that I say serious.

J~$$$$
07-11-2011, 04:14 PM
hydbro.

fatbastard
07-11-2011, 04:17 PM
Sex and what normal people are interested in bore me completely. I like getting my freak on and fucking and being loved, but its not interesting. Its a primal, simple thing. People think about it too much. It drives too much of the consumer zombies.

I've never been to a strip club, never had a one night stand. I just think that shits not real. Its like going to church or eating a candy bar. It makes you feel good. How many other thingss make you feel good though? If your out there doing rad shit and having fun doing things of suubstance your going to attract more people than you will trying to be witty and spit game in a bar. Meet a chick at the rock climbing gym for example. You share something in common. Your both being healthy. Your both in shape. You can see muscles and skin while using your brain and body. Your overcoming challenges.

Is that a better adventure book than sharing an addiction in common, both being unable to walk or see straight, standing on the smoking patio, being in a dim lit room and not knowing if the person your talking to looks deformed or its just the lighting/booze. Your wasting money and adding pounds onto your ass?

Go on...

hydr1
07-11-2011, 04:17 PM
hydbro.

Is J money your juggalo name?

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 04:19 PM
I figured more people would have had you blocked, hydr.

Any confessions from your trip to Portland over the weekend?

J~$$$$
07-11-2011, 04:20 PM
hydr1

http://www.mutantvehicle.com/name_generator.htm

hydr1
07-11-2011, 04:24 PM
I figured more people would have had you blocked, hydr.

Any confessions from your trip to Portland over the weekend?

I hung out with alot of homos from frisco, they liked me alot.
I don't like queercore.

I love vegan food and the idea but I love babyback ribs more.
I missed my flight because I was drinking in the airport bar.
My vans smell like death after not wearing sox for days

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 04:28 PM
Hope it didn't cost ya anything to catch a new flight.

You should get some Sanuks or something for fests. I can't rock bulky shoes like that in the warm weather.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 04:31 PM
Hope it didn't cost ya anything to catch a new flight.

You should get some Sanuks or something for fests. I can't rock bulky shoes like that in the warm weather.

I have sanuks, I wear hemp vans..they're not bulky at all.

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 04:34 PM
I was thinking the straight up skateboarding, thick shoes that someone like Billy wears.

Speaking of, he is still at the hospital. Day 27. He is getting 5 more shock treatments. He thinks you, brandon, zach and I still want to kill him.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 04:36 PM
Oh for fuck's sake take your trivial, insubstantial conversation somewhere else.

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 04:37 PM
Oh for fuck's sake take your trivial, insubstantial conversation somewhere else.

Lick the sweat off my balls

malcolmjamalawesome
07-11-2011, 04:38 PM
Speaking of, he is still at the hospital. Day 27. He is getting 5 more shock treatments. He thinks you, brandon, zach and I still want to kill him.

I want to kill both of you after reading these posts.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 04:39 PM
Lick the sweat off my balls

Does that fall under the heading of "art" or "money"?

RedHotSgtPeppers
07-11-2011, 04:40 PM
Taken exclusively from the Bonnaroo X 2011 thread, from the page on the thread that Roo began, until the last page:


There's plenty of water stations, the water is COLD. There were even mmarching bands with tents giving out FREE ice and chips or mouth wash for donations.

I cleaned myself, consumed as much psychs as I could, smoked as much tree as I could, gave away everything I could, slept for less than a couple hours a day and we camped in the furthest camp there was.

I tried to spend as much money as I could and drank 24/7....spent 300 bucks, which really isn't shit for the way things were going. I don't understand how you can die.

I saw some mutant 400 pound people doing the Roo...if theyy can survive, anyone can.


I blame deaths on drugs and lack of common sense. You gotta keep a balance.



The beer was epic...so cold and glorious.

The fungi and liquids kept me wierd and charging tho.

Sleeps for suckers.....I feel like I just finished a tour in Saigon...charlie all over the place.
got a sickk new bubbler fromm shakedown, I slayed 46 wooks, blew 32 minds and chased three kids with a machette.



Security/line checks at Roo--- first day, I walked in with ALOT of mushrooms, filled camel back and a half ounce of kush....no issues. Ice drops are always stealth.
second day, less mushroomms, bought a sherlock bubbler from shakedown and brought that in, half ounce of kush, shrooms, camel back full of mushroom tea, pineapple juice and ice.... No problems. Thinking this was too good to be true, I switched it up for day three. I brought about an ounce of herb, the bubbler and the ice drops.

Every time I walked through centeroo, I opened the pockets and there was my bubbler. "Got any glass?"
"No just this bubbler and some weed"
"Pass through"

Prob the karma from giving my herb and shrooms to anyone that would take them. Seemed like good herb and acid was skimp at the farm and people were having trouble finding them.



Security/line checks at Roo--- first day, I walked in with ALOT of mushrooms, filled camel back and a half ounce of kush....no issues. Ice drops are always stealth.
second day, less mushroomms, bought a sherlock bubbler from shakedown and brought that in, half ounce of kush, shrooms, camel back full of mushroom tea, pineapple juice and ice.... No problems. Thinking this was too good to be true, I switched it up for day three. I brought about an ounce of herb, the bubbler and the ice drops.

Every time I walked through centeroo, I opened the pockets and there was my bubbler. "Got any glass?"
"No just this bubbler and some weed"
"Pass through"

Prob the karma from giving my herb and shrooms to anyone that would take them. Seemed like good herb and acid was skimp at the farm and people were having trouble finding them.



Im no fun...no one wants to party with an illiterate, drugged out wook

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 04:41 PM
Art, only if you do it in certain patterns. Money, if its worth it.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 04:56 PM
I was thinking the straight up skateboarding, thick shoes that someone like Billy wears.

Speaking of, he is still at the hospital. Day 27. He is getting 5 more shock treatments. He thinks you, brandon, zach and I still want to kill him.

Mabee these board members will have more caution when they wanna meet up with me.
I will literally drive you crazy.
I confess I was talking about some pretty weird shit. Like when I was saying playing with wd40 and a lighter and cooking the wooks in their tents and stuff...is it possible he was arround when I was saying that stuff or something? I don't understand any of that. Is he really getting shock treatments? Do they think that will help him? That's like some old school psych therapy I thought.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 04:56 PM
You're hard.

amyzzz
07-11-2011, 05:02 PM
Who is getting shock treatments? And why? And why the hell are you discussing it here?

chiapet
07-11-2011, 05:05 PM
He is confessing that being around him has potentially driven one of his friends crazy.

RedHotSgtPeppers
07-11-2011, 05:06 PM
Who is getting shock treatments? And why? And why the hell are you discussing it here?

Some guy that NC knows that wigged out at Bonnaroo this year and ran away because he thought that Hydr1 and a couple other people were "after him" and that they were "going to kill him."

If I remember correctly, didn't he get on a bus or something and go to a different state to try to get away from them?

Suffacated
07-11-2011, 05:08 PM
Reading the last 3 pages has made me like my boyfriend a little more.

Bev.....pay attention to this one.....please...

I.F.A.
07-11-2011, 05:14 PM
I confess that I've been watching this thread like a train-wreck. To which point,


Seriously telling me how I seem unhappy and how I hate women? Too many stuck up bitches....

I was tempted to quote all of the times you've used misogynistic language, however I think this will suffice:


And??? I was trying to see if you were a dumb drunk bitch...

Plus, Chia beat me to it:


hydr1, could you explain why any chick who disagrees with you is labeled by you as a "300 pound hairy man?" You've used that exact description a few times. You truly do seem to have a problem with independent women, whether that be in their career or financial success or solely holding to their own opinions in discourse with men. You call it "traditional;" I call it misogynistic and insecure.


Inasmuch as your attitude on here is a correct representation of your feelings toward women, I truly feel sorry for your girlfriend.

locachica73
07-11-2011, 05:18 PM
Inasmuch as your attitude on here is a correct representation of your feelings toward women, I truly feel sorry for your girlfriend.

I was thinking the same thing, you just use better words than I do.

RedHotSgtPeppers
07-11-2011, 05:24 PM
This is the point at which this seems appropriate:

http://i53.tinypic.com/2w7juh0.jpg

hydr1
07-11-2011, 05:29 PM
:yyablo

You poor poor people. Its so hard to deal with my dipshit thinking and terrible grammar. You are all much better people than me and you have me figured out so well.

J~$$$$
07-11-2011, 05:37 PM
Bitches just can't keep up with hydbros intensity. Bro is fringe.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 05:41 PM
Are you confessing that you can't keep me off your mind?
Or that you think everyone is a bro like all techno is dubstep?

RedHotSgtPeppers
07-11-2011, 05:43 PM
http://i53.tinypic.com/5kli7t.png

hydr1
07-11-2011, 05:45 PM
I confess that I've been watching this thread like a train-wreck. To which point,
I was tempted to quote all of the times you've used misogynistic language, however I think this will suffice
Plus, Chia beat me to it:

Inasmuch as your attitude on here is a correct representation of your feelings toward women, I truly feel sorry for your girlfriend.

Another cry baby...how surprising. My attitude here is a correct representation of what I lead you to believe dummie, dum dumb, dummy. You must assume jesus died for your sins because it said so in a book you read somewhere. When you actually meet him and figure him out come back and tell me what he's really like please. Could you do that?

That there boah used the wherd bitches and he can't spell very well. He must beat his dahg and hate his mother. Their seems to be hate were experienceing.

chiapet
07-11-2011, 06:28 PM
You know, I don't care when you say ridiculously condescending stuff to me, but I'm tired of seeing you lash out at every chick that crosses your path on this board. You have some serious issues, and I've tired of reading them. Back on ignore.

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 06:33 PM
Lol.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 06:37 PM
Like I know which of you idiots is a woman and which is a man.
you will all be treated like shit equally.

J~$$$$
07-11-2011, 06:41 PM
Bitches and men.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 06:52 PM
All this sadness over words. Judgment all around. Anyone complaining about what I think is a fucking tard. Whocares if I hate women or men or I hate animals or anything else. What's so hard to understand. People think differently. Respect is earned. I don't know any of you. Ill never allow you to disrespect me. Your all internet goobers I must confess.

Women= a lady with respect
Man= a man with respect
bitches= anyone of any gender that crys like a little baby or thinks they're bad ass and bossy.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 06:59 PM
Mabee one of those free drinks had roofies in it.

RedHotSgtPeppers
07-11-2011, 07:04 PM
Jesus Christ, it's spelled "maybe."

hydr1
07-11-2011, 07:07 PM
Jesus Christ, it's spelled "maybe."

Its spelled however I want to spell it you assclown. Call me an idiot or give me an f on my report card. Your the fucking loser spell checking the internet. This isn't a spelling bee.

PotVsKtl
07-11-2011, 07:10 PM
Something terrible is happening here.

guedita
07-11-2011, 07:14 PM
I usually just buy girls nachos.

With.....sour cream?

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 07:17 PM
This is almost as entertaining as the homerun derby Prince is about to win

guedita
07-11-2011, 07:17 PM
Its spelled however I want to spell it you assclown. Call me an idiot or give me an f on my report card. Your the fucking loser spell checking the internet. This isn't a spelling bee.

You're

hydr1
07-11-2011, 07:18 PM
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h296/tntinucci/hydr%20farm/2011/images-1-2.jpg

hydr1
07-11-2011, 07:31 PM
You're

Its funny and I understand why you correct bad grammer. Its equally entertaining that it gets you worked up. I know better, its not like I didn't get near perfect grades in english. That was one of my strongest subjects and I enjoy reading and writing. This is the internet however. Proofing and editing is for things being turned in for a grade or to be published.

If you enjoy editing so much, why not make a career of it and get paid for doing what you love. I get paid for doing what I love. Its fun. Try it.

RedHotSgtPeppers
07-11-2011, 07:31 PM
Okay, then.

Hydr1, you sir, are an idiot. I am not spell checking the Internet, I am spell checking an idiot ON the Internet.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 07:33 PM
Okay, then.

Hydr1, you sir, are an idiot. I am not spell checking the Internet, I am spell checking an idiot ON the Internet.

Your doing it because?
its funny?
your impressing your internet buddies?
You want me to not be an idiot?

Confess here. This is a confession thread. Why are you correcting an idiots spelling on the internet?

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 07:34 PM
Why don't we collectively move on now.

After walking home from the grocery store and finding myself locked out, I was too shy and embarrassed to take up any of my neighbors on their offer of letting me hang out until the manager came home so I sat outside my door and ate all the popsicles.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 07:38 PM
Why don't we collectively move on now.

After walking home from the grocery store and finding myself locked out, I was too shy and embarrassed to take up any of my neighbors on their offer of letting me hang out until the manager came home so I sat outside my door and ate all the popsicles.

Like a few single popsicles or a box? Fudge or fruit?

Hannahrain
07-11-2011, 07:44 PM
Trader Joe's fruit bars. A box of four, but I did give one away to a passerby. They weren't going to hold up long enough to make it inside.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 07:48 PM
Trader Joe's fruit bars. A box of four, but I did give one away to a passerby. They weren't going to hold up long enough to make it inside.

I love the mango bars

guedita
07-11-2011, 07:59 PM
get paid for doing what you love. I get paid for doing what I love. Its fun. Try it.

The job market for sleeping in and watching Law and Order SVU marathons til I pass out again has really suffered because of the economy, unfortunately. I'm stuck having to do an unpaid internship in the field.

hydr1
07-11-2011, 08:17 PM
The job market for sleeping in and watching Law and Order SVU marathons til I pass out again has really suffered because of the economy, unfortunately. I'm stuck having to do an unpaid internship in the field.

It will pay off im sure. Id prob type alot better here if I wasn't doing everything from a droid. Im still working on the cell phone skills. They didn't offer the courses when I was in school. Im fluent in pager code though.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 09:55 PM
I want to dig myself a shallow grave and weep.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 09:56 PM
But I'll dig hydr a much deeper one first.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 09:57 PM
To get this thread back on track/a tiny bit less dumb: I confess every time I see the Olympics silhouetted against the sunset with the Sound in front I think that I could stay here for a very long time.

PlayaDelWes
07-11-2011, 10:05 PM
Cliff notes for the last five pages of this thread please. Thanks in advance.

miscorrections
07-11-2011, 10:11 PM
Hydr vs. the world.

You're welcome.

Neighborhood Creep
07-11-2011, 10:15 PM
Worth the read. You might even applaud at times.

caeden
07-11-2011, 10:17 PM
or scratch out your eyes due to frustration

BROKENDOLL
07-11-2011, 10:29 PM
2 peaches, 1 cheese stick with 3 salami slices, 1 1/2 stale Oreos, 1 16 oz. can of chicken, eaten straight out of the can with a plastic fork, and 2 bags of microwave popcorn... one with 1/4 cup of added butter and Parmesan cheese for a twist... All of this washed down with 3 shots of tequila and bitter tears... I am a broken doll...

BROKENDOLL
07-11-2011, 10:31 PM
It could have been more than 3 shots. Who's counting?

M Sparks
07-12-2011, 12:52 AM
Wow

BROKENDOLL
07-12-2011, 02:00 AM
You've been on this diet before?

frizzlefry
07-12-2011, 02:06 AM
1. Read the last ten pages of this thread

2. Had an apparently unsubstantial and zombie-esqe romp with a new friend last night and I'm coming to terms with the fact that the quote "Nothing better than pussy, except new pussy" is false

SoulDischarge
07-12-2011, 06:17 AM
Just to reiterate . . .


Portrait Of The canexplain As A Young Man.

Thanks for the good times board. We don't do this kind of thing any more nearly as often as we should. I blame the women of the board primarily for not keeping the spark alive.

Suffacated
07-12-2011, 07:13 AM
Its spelled however I want to spell it you assclown. Call me an idiot or give me an f on my report card. Your the fucking loser spell checking the internet. This isn't a spelling bee.

I know the difference between write and wrong.