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View Full Version : The Unofficial Kristen Nicole Brown Circa 1999 Fan Club



miscorrections
08-09-2007, 03:04 PM
This has been a long time coming because Andrew fails at PR but finally, here it is. We need to get the word out. It's time that everyone got behind our message.

Mission Statement:

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1040/880129507_fe0949c22a.jpg

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1216/944903632_8889e21838.jpg

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1060/944904078_8a7adc66f7.jpg

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1080/944976342_f01b27dcd4.jpg

Positions already filled:

Vice President (miscorrections)
Treasurer (Courtney)
PR/meeting DJ (bballarl)
Head of European Branch (sonofhal)
Fanzine Editor-in-Chief (CuervoPH)
Herald (mountmccabe)
Colorado Connection (J~$$$)
Authority Figure (TomAz)
Residant Pastry Monger (thefunkylama)
Guidance Counselor (mob roulette)
Director of Music History (canexplain)
Resident Alcoholic Idiot friend of Unicorn Salesman (nothingman00)
Space Filler (kimery08)

We've got to take care of business, folks. We are now taking applications for the following positions so we can really get down to admiring, appreciating, and stalking Kristen Nicole Brown (circa 1999):

President*
Secretary
Activities Coordinator

If you would like to create your own position please submit a request and it will be considered with gravity befitting this fine institution.

*I can fill this position in a pinch, but all I really want to do is cast a tie-breaking vote in the case of such an event.

fober
08-09-2007, 03:12 PM
Does the Delicious Snacks Director actually have to provide the snacks?

Also, who the fuck is Kristen Nicole Brown?

TomAz
08-09-2007, 03:15 PM
Plymouth "Rocks". oh jeez.

amyzzz
08-09-2007, 03:16 PM
Does the Delicious Snacks Director actually have to provide the snacks?

Also, who the fuck is Kristen Nicole Brown?
Didn't she die of a methadone overdose a few months back?

edit: no, wait, I mean didn't she get killed by her husband 13 years ago?

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 03:16 PM
Does the Delicious Snacks Director actually have to provide the snacks?

Also, who the fuck is Kristen Nicole Brown?

to the first: unless we physically get together, no. just provide the idea of snacks.

to the second: FOR SHAME. kristen = ewiggy.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 03:17 PM
Plymouth "Rocks". oh jeez.

tom, how about channeling your negative energy into positive channels and volunteering, hmm?

algunz
08-09-2007, 03:18 PM
Something or Somebody needs to kill her.

Edit - ooops sorry, E. If I'd known, I would have known.

amyzzz
08-09-2007, 03:18 PM
Who??

J~$$$
08-09-2007, 03:22 PM
Can I be the "colorado connection"?

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 03:23 PM
that would be beyond delightful. job duties will be up to you, so do as you see fit.

algunz
08-09-2007, 03:23 PM
I think you already are. You and Ron.

J~$$$
08-09-2007, 03:25 PM
that would be beyond delightful. job duties will be up to you, so do as you see fit.

I scare the shit out of goths.

algunz
08-09-2007, 03:26 PM
That's good, because they need to let some of that shit go.

TomAz
08-09-2007, 03:28 PM
tom, how about channeling your negative energy into positive channels and volunteering, hmm?

I was going to volunteer but I don't think I understand this club. namely the 'circa 1999' bit. I'm afraid of things I don't understand. There, I said it.


edit Also I don't understand why miscorrections has all this personal stuff on KNB '99. that kinda creeps me out a bit.

edit Also, goths don't listen to Okkervil River, so that confuses me a lot too. Let's face it, I'm just not as intellectually agile as I used to be.

amyzzz
08-09-2007, 03:30 PM
see the confessions thread and all will be clear.

TomAz
08-09-2007, 03:39 PM
thank you

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 03:45 PM
i have all kinds of personal stuff on her because that's what i do. i collect every scrap of knb c. 1999 information i can get my hands on.


also thanks for calling me creepy, tom. it means a lot coming from you.

TomAz
08-09-2007, 03:48 PM
that's twice in two days I've inadvertantly offended you. I need to be more deliberate about it. creep.

Sign me up for something or another, I'm in.

SFChrissy
08-09-2007, 03:51 PM
you guys are killing me with laughter.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 03:54 PM
that's twice in two days I've inadvertantly offended you. I need to be more deliberate about it. creep.

Sign me up for something or another, I'm in.

tom, will you be my dad? and as an extension of that, will you be the official fan club authority figure?

TomAz
08-09-2007, 03:56 PM
tom, will you be my dad? and as an extension of that, will you be the official fan club authority figure?

dad? ouch. good one though.

authority figure? I have no authority that anyone respects. So, yes, I accept.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 03:59 PM
fantastic. thank you!

fober
08-09-2007, 03:59 PM
I'm campaigning for Delicious Snacks Director up until my future resignation prior to when snacks actually have to be provided.

tessalasset
08-09-2007, 04:00 PM
creepy, her name is kristen nicole brown? that's sort of unfortunate.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 04:00 PM
and then we'll rope in thefunkylama.

TomAz
08-09-2007, 04:02 PM
creepy, her name is kristen nicole brown? that's sort of unfortunate.

I don't get it. I told you this thread was confusing.

tessalasset
08-09-2007, 04:06 PM
Nicole Brown Simpson.


Amy already referenced it too.

TomAz
08-09-2007, 04:10 PM
http://www.channel4.com/media/userpages/accepted/216962_dunce.png

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 04:29 PM
tom, when did you join the junior klansmen?

TomAz
08-09-2007, 04:32 PM
when I became an authority figure.

CuervoPH
08-09-2007, 05:01 PM
I think for the first Fanzine, I'm going to do an interview with Kristen circa 1999. I realize I may have to make up some of the responses, but knowing is half the battle.

At some point, I also want to include photos from the first annual KNB Circa 1999 Convention. I'll have to check with our treasurer, Courtney, to see if we have enough funds for me to upgrade my digital cam. Otherwise, I'll make do. I'm a team player.

mob roulette
08-09-2007, 05:44 PM
I'm thinking maybe Catologuer of Journal Entries for me. I have a fairly good idea of what she might write circa 1999. Or would that be an Archivist? Historian? I think that position might already be filled by miscorrections. Then I was thinking Foster Parent, but that's totally Tom.

Oh wait, I got it. School Psychiatrist. Or Guidance Counselor. Yes, Guidance Counselor. That's me. Prescient and worthless. I also have a keen grasp of the obvious, so that certainly might help.

I wholeheartedly support this thread, by the way.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 05:47 PM
oh, i'm not a historian. i'm just the founder.

samiksha
08-09-2007, 06:05 PM
i know i'm not in the club or anything. just an observer. but could some one do a little digging and find out some things about kristen pre 1999? to better understand kristen circa 1999? is that too creepy?

also, what is that article even about? the colorado connection? what is that? has this already been discussed?

mob roulette
08-09-2007, 06:07 PM
Columbine.

samiksha
08-09-2007, 06:08 PM
OHHHHHHHHHHHH. right.:o

mob roulette
08-09-2007, 06:41 PM
http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1216/944903632_8889e21838.jpg


Is that a Bauhaus shirt in that one as well? I remember that design, but I don't remember who the band was.

Nicole, I am concerned. I think we need to talk. Let's get down and "rap" and see what's really going on with you. Please report to my office after sixth period. Thank you.

http://www.radaronline.com/features/images/2007/01/freaks-and-geeks.jpg

comiddle
08-09-2007, 07:02 PM
Huh. All this time I thought it was Kirsten.

bballarl
08-09-2007, 07:39 PM
*spins 1999 by Prince*

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 08:05 PM
and you thought we needed PotVsKtl, andrew. i sure proved you wrong.

not that Pot wouldn't be welcomed with cheers and open arms. him and his surviving pants.

bballarl
08-09-2007, 08:41 PM
*ignores miscorrections and spins Get Innocuous by LCD Soundsystem...grooves a bit*

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 08:51 PM
ignore me? don't you evah.

nothingman00
08-09-2007, 09:58 PM
Kristen Brown Simpson-OJ couldn't have been that bad... He was in Airplane.

canexplain
08-09-2007, 10:04 PM
I think you already are. You and Ron.
na J$$$$ deserves the colorado connection badge, hummm i want to be "director of music history" ya, thats the ticket cr****

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 10:05 PM
anything for the awesomeness that is ron.

nothingman00
08-09-2007, 10:06 PM
I like C.Ron. He;s like Tom on steroids but with bigger nuts.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 10:25 PM
Bitches think you can do this without me?

Fuck that. Fuck YOU.

















What title could I take that would allow me to be brazen and belligerent?

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 10:26 PM
hannah, i tried to get you into this a long time ago. YOU HAVE NO GROUNDS TO BE INDIGNANT, MISSY.

edit for proof:
would either of you be interested in officer positions? because andrew, he of little faith, won't accept that this is the best club ever until everything's filled.

that was addressed to you and bug. go see for yourself.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 10:31 PM
You're nothing but a dilettante. In five years, you'll be worshipping at the feet of someone who probably isn't even ON the internet yet.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 10:36 PM
in five years you'll be giving your swatch collection pet names.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 10:40 PM
In five MONTHS, your only friend (http://img.hexus.net/v2/lifestyle/internat_events/macworld07/iphone_inhandhome_c.jpg) will be obsolete.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 10:43 PM
HEY. LOW BLOW.

in five DAYS i'll make sure that you never work in this town again.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 10:45 PM
Why in god's name would I EVER want to work in La Jolla?

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 10:52 PM
oh no you di'nt. i'm never letting you join this fan club. never.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 10:53 PM
I will beat you into submission with one hand tied behind my back.

psychic friend
08-09-2007, 10:54 PM
im confused, is mis - ewig?

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 10:59 PM
No. Mis is starting a Kristen circa 1999 club and she's all "Ohhhh Hannah please be in my club" but then I was all "Bitch you live in La Jolla" and she's all "I never wanted you in my club anyway waaahh wahhh waaaa" and I'm all "Whatev" then you were all "What?" and then I was all "explain explain explain" and so now you can be all "Ohhhhh".

psychic friend
08-09-2007, 11:00 PM
but i thought ewig was kristen. im so confused right now

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 11:01 PM
Ewig is Kristen. Miscorrections wants to bone Kristen. Miscorrections is Corinna. Corinna is not Kristen.

Kristen, Dani. Dani, Kristen. Corinna, Kristen. Kristen, Corinna. Dani, Corinna. Corinna, Dani.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 11:02 PM
oh girl don't even be frontin'. ima yank yo weave out you nastyass bitch.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 11:04 PM
I don't have a weave. It must be your eyelash weave on your droopy eyelids that you're seeing.

psychic friend
08-09-2007, 11:04 PM
ok i get it now. kristen is e, mis wants e. mmmm e

mob roulette
08-09-2007, 11:08 PM
I've been waiting to make a lesbian joke for nearly twenty minutes, but didn't dare make a sound in the hope that this might go further. Since the tone has now gone from playful to viperish, you all go ahead and fight. Maybe use pillows though. Maybe get into some more comfortable clothes too. Here, let me turn down the lights. You guys like Coltrane? I have some wine in the fridge.

Seriously. Please continue.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 11:08 PM
hannah, i hate fighting with you. we're soulmates.

mob roulette
08-09-2007, 11:09 PM
See, that's progress.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 11:09 PM
hannah, i hate fighting with you. we're soulmates.

I hate your soul.

disgustipated
08-09-2007, 11:11 PM
I was doin' the same Mob..

you ladies want some Opus?

disgustipated
08-09-2007, 11:12 PM
*Ok that was creepy, sorry...















carry on.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 11:13 PM
I hate your soul.

spiteful.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 11:16 PM
I think maybe we ought to put on lots and lots of bulky layers, and settle this with a from-the-heart discussion. Maybe while watching Lifetime and complaining about cramps.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 11:18 PM
i can't do bulky layers and i don't get cramps. you're so selfish sometimes.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 11:19 PM
I don't get them either. I was trying to extend an olive branch. You dumb slut.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 11:20 PM
i guess we could bond over that? the dumb slut thing. 'cause i was just gonna tell you that you were one.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 11:21 PM
Awww. You're so sweet. A girl couldn't ask for a better nemesis.

mob roulette
08-09-2007, 11:23 PM
Much better.

Hi Corinna, I'm James, btw. You into astronomy? Stargazing? You two wanna go for a drive or something? I know this place that makes the best hot chai with cream. We could talk. About whatever you want. I'm a good listener.

disgustipated
08-09-2007, 11:26 PM
you asshole!

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 11:26 PM
i'm sorry, but that has nothing to do with knb c. 1999.

when i'm not feuding with hannah kristen is the topic.

psychic friend
08-09-2007, 11:27 PM
this is beyond my realm but with in my humor

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 11:33 PM
It's well within your realm. Come on, PF. Call me a dumb slut. That's all it takes.

miscorrections
08-09-2007, 11:33 PM
hannah, when you're not a bitch you're a delight.

Hannahrain
08-09-2007, 11:35 PM
Come into chat so we can talk about mani/pedis.

disgustipated
08-09-2007, 11:36 PM
Call me a dumb slut. That's all it takes.

I was SO going to sig that, but I won't.

fatbastard
08-09-2007, 11:51 PM
This has been a long time coming because Andrew fails at PR but finally, here it is. We need to get the word out. It's time that everyone got behind our message.

Mission Statement:

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1040/880129507_fe0949c22a.jpg

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1216/944903632_8889e21838.jpg

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1060/944904078_8a7adc66f7.jpg

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1080/944976342_f01b27dcd4.jpg

Positions already filled:

Vice President (miscorrections)
Treasurer (Courtney)
PR/meeting DJ (bballarl)
Head of European Branch (sonofhal)
Fanzine Editor-in-Chief (CuervoPH)
Herald (mountmccabe)
Colorado Connection (J-$$$)
Authority Figure (TomAz)
Delicious Snacks Director (fober)
Guidance Counselor (mob roulette)
Director of Music History (canexplain)

We've got to take care of business, folks. We are now taking applications for the following positions so we can really get down to admiring, appreciating, and stalking Kristen Nicole Brown (circa 1999):

President*
Secretary
Activities Coordinator

If you would like to create your own position please submit a request and it will be considered with gravity befitting this fine institution.

*I can fill this position in a pinch, but all I really want to do is cast a tie-breaking vote in the case of such an event.

Ewiggy was such a cuttie in high school.

With all due respect to Fober, I resent the fact of not being consitered for the role of Delicious Snacks Director! I have spent many painstaking hours at eating at many different places. I appreciate and understand food regardless if it's a taco truck on Cesar Chavez or a big chain on La Cienega. That is all, over.

nothingman00
08-09-2007, 11:56 PM
"Resident Alcoholic Idiot friend of Unicorn Salesman"- make it an honorary tite.

miscorrections
08-10-2007, 12:22 AM
Ewiggy was such a cuttie in high school.

With all due respect to Fober, I resent the fact of not being consitered for the role of Delicious Snacks Director! I have spent many painstaking hours at eating at many different places. I appreciate and understand food regardless if it's a taco truck on Cesar Chavez or a big chain on La Cienega. That is all, over.

you guys fight it out gladiator style. i will provide kitchen implements for use as weapons, pick one.

items:
spatula
whisk
mandoline
rolling pin
basting brush
potato masher
oven mit

fatbastard
08-10-2007, 12:31 AM
I'll take the basting brush. I can use it to rub the lavender, garlic, kosher salt, ginger, fresh ground pepper, olive oil mixture after knocking him out and laying him on a BBQ grill. I will then roll up his succulent meat in filo dough for appitizers and pass him around to the group to eat with a glass of Cakebread Merlot (sorry Fober).

http://www.enchantedlearning.com/ogifs/Ostrich_bw.GIF

disgustipated
08-10-2007, 12:45 AM
I would take the mandoline.

ewiggy
08-10-2007, 12:45 AM
creepy, her name is kristen nicole brown? that's sort of unfortunate.

not nearly as unfortunate as tessa lasset.

bballarl
08-10-2007, 01:16 AM
I leave for 10 minutes and you guys start making a mess. Maybe Hannah/Corinna's official names can be "Problem causers".

*plays Mazzy Star so everyone will calm down and focus on important stuff*

bballarl
08-10-2007, 01:17 AM
not nearly as unfortunate as tessa lasset.

Also, this is totally true. Lasset is a terrible last name. Maybe you should legally change it to something.

Hannahrain
08-10-2007, 09:26 AM
Maybe Hannah/Corinna's official names can be "Problem causers".

Maybe Andrew's official name should be "And they never heard from him again".

tessalasset
08-10-2007, 09:38 AM
you're right. i should definitely change my last name from lasset to something entirely different.

disgustipated
08-10-2007, 09:40 AM
just turn it around

tessalasset
08-10-2007, 09:41 AM
you are probably the first smart person on this board.

J~$$$
08-10-2007, 09:43 AM
L'asset. The apostrophe makes it dynamic.

CuervoPH
08-10-2007, 09:51 AM
L'asset...sounds like something in a French accounting class...as you can see, l'asset is offset by l'expense...

tessalasset
08-10-2007, 10:11 AM
You accountants are all the same.

miscorrections
08-10-2007, 11:35 AM
andrew, you're a deadbeat dj. i won't take any sass from you.

nothingman00
08-10-2007, 12:09 PM
Also, this is totally true. Lasset is a terrible last name. Maybe you should legally change it to something.

I couldn't agree more: Tessa Something has a real ring to it...

miscorrections
08-10-2007, 12:14 PM
also fober you have to state how you would fight fatbastard or else he'll win the position automatically for including a diagram of an ostrich.

kimery08
08-10-2007, 12:23 PM
i dont really know what position i can fill but i want to be the person everyone talks about in secret because i only go to meetings for the snacks and possibly a crush, but really contributes nothing at all.
what does that fall under?

miscorrections
08-10-2007, 12:24 PM
space filler

kimery08
08-10-2007, 12:32 PM
perfect.

wheres the snack guy? i want some string cheese

miscorrections
08-10-2007, 12:34 PM
we don't know who it is yet.

kimery08
08-10-2007, 12:35 PM
oh thats right. see, i dont even pay attention.

miscorrections
08-10-2007, 12:36 PM
you win member of the month. congratulations!

fatbastard
08-10-2007, 01:13 PM
perfect.

wheres the snack guy? i want some string cheese

Your cheese as requested.

http://www.hormel.com/images/glossary/c/cheese_string.jpg

Here's a napkin for you.
http://www.napkinfoldingguide.com/07-crown/foldnapkins/crownnapkinfold.jpg

thefunkylama
08-10-2007, 02:41 PM
I hate to break it to you, fober and bastard, but I just made your position obsolete.

Resident Pastry Monger: Thefunkylama.

tessalasset
08-10-2007, 02:55 PM
you guys dont even know what you're up against.

sonofhal
08-10-2007, 03:04 PM
Don't mess with the piemaster.

kimery08
08-10-2007, 03:09 PM
yes! pies are way better than cheese.
winner.

bballarl
08-10-2007, 04:21 PM
andrew, you're a deadbeat dj. i won't take any sass from you.

I can't hear you over the din. I'm playing Psychocandy by JAMC in its entirety.

miscorrections
08-10-2007, 05:12 PM
I'm playing your mom.

amyzzz
08-10-2007, 05:14 PM
Just shag already and get it over with.

miscorrections
08-10-2007, 08:55 PM
pipe down, amy. and i mean that in the nicest way possible.

alma, i think our numbers would swell if you'd be our pastry monger. pie at meetings = tears of gratitude.

ewiggy
08-10-2007, 09:06 PM
i can't tell who is being funny and who is not. i feel like i don't even know you guys anymore.

CuervoPH
08-10-2007, 09:14 PM
I oftentimes feel I'm being funny and later am told I'm not. This isn't one of those times, is it? (Don't worry. Your answer doesn't affect the fanzine in any way. I have principles.)

mob roulette
08-10-2007, 09:45 PM
Tmbiji_uP6c

(Uh. Probably NSFW in retrospect. But puppets!)

bballarl
08-11-2007, 12:21 AM
Hey Kristen. Are you in LA yet?

fatbastard
08-11-2007, 06:52 AM
The people have spoken.

TomAz
08-11-2007, 07:17 AM
i can't tell who is being funny and who is not. i feel like i don't even know you guys anymore.

you have a fan club. a FAN CLUB! you have no right to be paranoid.

bballarl
08-11-2007, 11:46 AM
I say at our first official meeting we create a metal sculpture of Kristen circa 1999.

Courtney
08-11-2007, 05:36 PM
As treasurer I might suggest fund-raising before any sort of sculpture-casting activities. Bake sale, anyone? Cookie in the shape of Kristen c. 1999's head?

CuervoPH
08-11-2007, 05:59 PM
We have a pastry monger now. I suggest mini-pies instead of, or in addition to, cookies. We probably want to sample them before we put them on sale. This will furnish us with key selling points that will ensure the fund raiser is an overwhelming success.

mob roulette
08-11-2007, 06:12 PM
I say at our first official meeting we create a metal sculpture of Kristen circa 1999.


As treasurer I might suggest fund-raising before any sort of sculpture-casting activities. Bake sale, anyone? Cookie in the shape of Kristen c. 1999's head?

R0Mj5VGqtKQ

miscorrections
08-11-2007, 06:21 PM
let's see if we can get someone to donate scrap metal and then hell yeah we'll make a sculpture. a big one, with one foot on an outcrop flying a bauhaus flag.

Hannahrain
08-11-2007, 07:02 PM
I can sew member jackets. Who's going to put in for leather sleeves?

thefunkylama
08-11-2007, 07:12 PM
We should ask Kristen circa now.

miscorrections
08-11-2007, 07:14 PM
i wish kristen circa now would join this club, it would add an air of authenticity.

tessalasset
08-11-2007, 07:14 PM
she has arrived according to her myspace bulletin.

ewiggy
08-11-2007, 10:53 PM
it's true.

tessalasset
08-12-2007, 03:19 AM
proof!

Alchemy
08-12-2007, 08:57 AM
Can I be just a regular member of this fanclub? Where do I subscribe to the fanzine?

CuervoPH
08-12-2007, 09:12 AM
Once I have met with the treasurer and determined how much funding the fanzine will initially have, I'll provide details on how to subscribe. But just to let you know, I am thinking about throwing in a Kristen circa 1999 trivia contest in the first issue where we would award a prize for the most correct answers. If anyone has any Kristen c. 1999 trivia they'd like to submit, feel free to do so. I will give you credit for the submission.